If you guys ever needed proof of our insanity, check out a totally imaginary instant message conversation between entirely fabricated people about an undeniably real event you undoubtedly want to attend. (Would we lie to you?)

TtlyKewl: Hey, what are you doing Sunday?

BrdNYC: I don't know. Picking my ass, probably.

TtlyKewl: Hmm, while that sounds pretty compelling, why don't you head down to Cielo around 10pm.

BrdNYC: Why? Is the Westboro Baptist Church performing?

TtlyKewl: No. Way better than that.

BrdNYC: What could better than the musical stylings of WBC?

TtlyKewl: Fischerspooner.

BrdNYC: Wow! You're right. Fischerspooner's way cooler that WBC.

TtlyKewl: I know. So you should head down to Cielo for Josh Wood's Master Class series and hear some Fischerspooner, homie. Oh, and John Selway's opening.

BrdNYC: Cool. What's the cover?

TtlyKewl: 10 bones before midnight, 15 after, but a portion of the proceeds go The Stonewall Foundation - you know, the LGBT grantwriters who've given away over $11 million since their 1990 founding.

BrdNYC: Sweet. I'm there.

TtlyKewl: Neat.

BrdNYC: Wait, where's Cielo?

TtlyKewl: 18 Little West 12th Street.

(Art by Saul Zanolari)