Looking for some turkeys to stuff this year? Feces on the Family, or, excuse us, the group is called Focus on the Family, is going to be out in force along the length of the Macy’s parade, distributing materials promoting an ex-gay ministry. Macy’s can’t lift a limp whanger against the group because the parade is on public property. That doesn’t exactly excuse Dr. Phil and Oprah Winfrey, on whose programs “Feces” began running ads this past Monday.

Oprah once said: “Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody’s going to know whether you did it or not.” Queerty calls for her to put her money where her mouth is and order the Feces ads removed from her program’s time slots.

An FOF web site offers visitors pages addressing various problems, including “Gambling” and “Spiritual Struggles;” they need to add one for “Narrow Mindedness.”

The campaign of ignorance about homosexuality will include the tossing out of hand-sized squeezable “stress balls” imprinted with the Feces ex-gay message. Queerty can think of no better protest than for drag queens to mob the parade route, catching the balls, squealing with delight, and then padding their bras with them. If Macy’s wants to make it up to us next year, they should introduce a balloon modeled on Jared Leto’s member.