In what we believe is the first contest of its type on the radio, Howard Stern held a "small penis contest" that was surprisingly well-attended. From what we can tell, it involved showing up naked for the Howard Stern show, telling a story about your small penis, and then singing a song about it. Then the contestants were subjected to ridicule by Howard "I have a small penis" Stern and his cronies.

We at Queerty are not size-queens by any means, but we were intrigued by some of the guys in the video, as they really had no penis at all. Fascinating!

1st Annual Small Penis Contest [NSFW] [Howard Stern via WOW Report]

• Al Gore is so totally running for President in 2008. [NYDailyNews]

• Speaking of politics: the State Department is taking on rude Americans tourists who travel abroad. Finally! Maybe they can teach President Bush a thing or two. [ManoloMen]

• Speaking of abroad: the most attractive man in the U.K. Really? [FemaleFirst]

• Speaking of femalefirst.com, Lindsey Lohan will visit AIDS clinics in Kenya. We loves the Lohan. [FemaleFirst]

• Howard Stern likes Rosie O'Donnell now. See? Even Howard is on our campaign to bring Rosie back. [The Malcontent]

• Johnny Weir is too gay for ice skating, according to officials. In a related report, the officials complained the ice is too cold for ice skating, the sky is too blue, and no one should ever look at Josh Duhamel ever again because he is just too attractive. [SocialiteLife]

• Wanna see Clay Aiken’s white torso and cam pics? Neither did we. [Perez Hilton]

• Andy found Tyler from the Real World on Friendster. [Towleroad]

• Bad news for cokeheads. [Gizmodo]

• A lesbian writer shares her love of Howard Stern. [Gay.com]

• The new James Bond is pretty freaking hot. [Kenneth in the (212)]

• Nate Berkus shows up on the cover of O at Home magazine, looking as good as always and bent over in our favorite position. [Oprah.com]

• Howard Stern picked the brain of Clay Aiken's bedpost notch John Paulus on his radio show this morning and Paulus revealed that Clay is (gasp!) a top! [The Malcontent]

• A "study released by gay rights advocates shows gay and lesbian students in Iowa schools are subjected to taunts and harassment." And in other news, the Earth revolves around the sun. [Radio Iowa]

• The Family Institute of Connecticut has evidence that gay & lesbian homes are harmful environments for children. Paparazzi photographs of Michael Jackson and his occasionaly balcony-dangling, constantly shrouded kids don't count. [The Boston Globe]

• Gawker has announced the winner of Project Runway and It's Nick who just so happened to get eliminated from last night's episode! Yeah. Not so much. [Gawker]

• Attempting to cash in on Brokeback Mountain as much as he can, Heath Ledger has put his Aussie home up for sale. [Towleroad]

• We don’t know what was more surprising about Madonna’s Grammy performance, her perfect body or her ability to actually carry a tune. [You Tube]

• And for the record: the new video is fierce. [You Tube]

• Michael Lucas is on Howard Stern’s show this AM with Clay Aiken’s buttboy. Someone needs to tell us what was said. [Lucas Blog]

• Planet Out is looking for a blog network manager to develop their blog network. And they have not called us up yet, why? [Craigslist]

• This is a great interview with Jody Watley, who we love dearly here at Queerty. [Midnight Lounge]

• We think that secretly Gene Shalit loved Brokeback Mountain and we think he'll secretly love this poster just as much. (Thanks Matthew)

• Howard Stern has always supported the gays. Well, at least the lesbians. He's now given out actor George Takei an announcer gig on his new Sirius show. Maybe now we can hear the Star Trek thespian enunciate more than just the phrase "wet hot bitches." [Philly Burbs]

• Phantom of the Opera becomes the longest running musical in Broadway history, thanks mostly to all of us faithful gays. [Reuters]

• Kathy Griffin won't back down to anyone, even Hollywood God Steven Spielberg. This is why she is our queen. [NY Post]

• Camera whore Lisa Gastineau most likely crashes lesbian bars for the attention and not because she's earnestly searching for fish. [Gawker]

•We know you used to sit in your bedroom and sing "People Are People" dreaming of the day you could act out your adolecent lust for other boys. Well take a stroll down memory lane this fall. Depeche Mode are going on tour.

•In a post from last week we suggested supporting the Children's AIDS Fund. Well don't. A reader alerts us to the fact that the organization is run by Anita and Shephard Smith, who are abstinence-only fundamentalists. See? Give here instead.

•An "ex-gay" goes on Howard Stern and and Howard plays clips of gay porn. Classic.

•Champagne for Hilary! We mean Lulu! Hillary Clinton and British pop tart/AbFab alum Lulu, seperated at birth?

•City Rag shows us that Hellbent is not the 1st gay horror film. Anyone remember A Nightmare On Elm Street Part 2: Freddy's Revenge? Well, duh. We don't either but this is funny nonetheless.