Madonna's publicist may have dismissed rumors the material mom's on the prowl for another Malawian baby, but The Sun reports otherwise. Madge's forthcoming goodwill mission to the African nation may be a stake out on a little girl named Grace. A source "close to the star" - whatever that means - tells the British tab-rag:

Madonna saw a film of children at a place called The Consol Home. She spotted a beautiful girl called Grace who lit the room with her smile, and fell head over heels for her. Madonna kept saying, ‘That girl has so much love in her. I want to help her achieve her potential’.

But adoption officials are being very strict after the uproar when Madonna adopted David. They know Grace is her first choice, but have insisted she looks at other girls first — and that the final decision is theirs.

Apparently adoption authorities are asking Madonna to take a look at a wider selection before making her final decision. Among the potential adoptees, a little girl named Jessica and another called Mercy. Mercy versus Grace - how poetic.

The controversy over David erupted primarily because his father's still in the picture. Little Grace, however, has lost both parents, which means, of course, she's an easier sell.

All is not well in the House of Madge. MSNBC reports that director hubbie Guy Ritchie's not so keen on her new plan to steal adopt every last baby in Malawi. A friend allegedly told British rag, The People:

She drove the whole adoption process on from start to finish and Guy was left trailing in her slipstream just nodding and going along with things...Guy doesn’t want to go through all the media attention again which he hates. Although he loves little David [Banda, the African boy the couple adopted] as his own, he thinks they should be both concentrating on their own relationship at this time, not adding a new one.

We'd like to say a few things about this quote. One, when has Ritchie not trailed behind Madonna? Two, Ritchie's superstar wife could fart and make the front page, so if he hates all the media attention, he really shouldn't have married her. Third, if Ritchie puts a stop to Madonna's Malawi adventure, young David's the luckiest not-so orphan in the world. If Ritchie fails, well, then he's going to have to settle for being one of the luckiest not-so orphans in the world.

Sorry, kid, life's tough.

Related: More Madonna Maternal Malawi Mining?

Just when you thought it was safe to adopt an African baby!

It seems Madonna - the little known American singer who recently "adopted" a child from Malawi - may not have explained everything to Yohane Banda, the father of her new tot, David. Even though Banda supported Madonna just last week, as international groups raised a stink against Madonna for what seemed like a great colonial kidnapping, he now claims he's been duped, insisting he didn't understand what Madonna meant by "adopting."

Banda was under the impression that Madonna was going to raise the kid and then give him back to Banda. He says:

Had they told us that Madonna wanted to adopt my son and make him her own son, we would not have agreed to that... I cannot read and write so I relied on what the (government) officials told me that the papers said Madonna would look after the child the way the orphanage planned to educate him and then he comes back to me...

Well, basically Banda's right: Madonna will care for David, give him everything he needs/wants, school him, and the rest. Of course, as with all adoptions, lil' David will no doubt have his chance to return to his home at the age of eighteen.

Yeah fucking right! Like that kids going to just leave Madonna and his millions of dollars to go chill in Malawi with pops. If he's a good kid, he'll take some of the money Madonna will no doubt give him and send it to his father or - if he's a fucking saint - he'll bring his father to London to live with him.

Oh, and if you want to know what Jacob Zuma says about all of this adoption drama, he says that Malawi should have more flexible laws. You know, just so you're informed...

Alright, so by now we all know that Madonna's adopted/stolen a baby from Malawi.

So, how does Madge feel now that's she gotten her new guppie? In a statement, the pop-star insisted, "It's so worth it. He's just the best baby ever. Guy and I have never been happier."

See the above picture? That's the new baby. Who's that woman holding the baby? Not Madonna. But don't worry, Madonna's really, really excited about the baby. So excited, in fact, that she can only hold its bottle.

She probably can't concentrate as she plots her next baby crime-spree. The Daily Mail reports:

And she has already got her eyes on a three-year-old girl from the same village as David. Describing the moment she saw her, she said: "I looked at this child with questioning dark eyes and the saddest smile. I thought, 'She looks just like me.' I told Guy, 'We must give this child a home, too.'"

Damn! This bitch is far crazier than we ever imagined! Her excessive fame fame has either turned her brain to mush or she lives in a parallel universe (or both, actually). Anyway you cut it, she's out of control.

Does she plan on just taking babies until someone stops her? Is she trying for an entire rainbow of children? We've got Lourdes, who is brown, Rocco, who's a little cracker if we ever saw one, and now little black Daniel.

Where will she strike next? Your guess is as good/offensive as ours.

Another day, another Madonna adopts a Malawian baby rumor. First a government official says that Madge came to the small African country to find a baby boy, then her publicist says that ain't nothing but bullshit, and now we've got yet another report that she'll be bringing more than just a few knick-knacks back from her trip.

Malawian government officials said last week the pop star planned to adopt a Malawian boy while she is in the impoverished African nation visiting projects she funds for AIDS orphans. However, they declined to comment on Yohame Banda's claim that his son David had been adopted by the singer.

You gotta hand it to Madonna. Even after all these years, she still manages to keep us guessing.

We're inclined to believe it, not because we trust this Banda character, but because Liz Rosenberg, the material mama's publicist, has yet to issue a denial. That's like Hollywood's version of a confirmation. Only not. Tricky, right?

Still, things about this "story" remain a bit dodgy: some say the potential baby goes by the name David, while others insist he's called Luca, while yet others doubt he even exists.

Through all of this baby drama, we keep asking ourselves why we care. Then we remember: we're gay. Madonna's so ingrained in our DNA that she could take a shit and we'd call it news.

Breaking: Madonna Just Farted!

Previously: Madonna Has No African Baby

Months of touring isn't tiring Madonna. Rather than take a break to let the paparazzi trail her as she plays in the park with Lourdes, she's already on to a new project: Malawi. In an interview with Time, the reigning queen of pop says she's making the African nation a priority, donating her time, cash, and, certainly, her celebrity presence. Because Angelina Jolie ain't the only lass in town who can make every third grader and 77-year-old suddenly know where to find an African country on a map.

And being Madonna, she's not arriving in Malawi by halves. She has already committed to raising at least $3 million to fund programs particularly aimed at orphans there. Of Malawi's population of 12 million, about a million are orphans. Ground has just been broken on an orphan care center, which aims to feed and educate as many as 1,000 children a day. She has also formed a partnership with developing-world economic guru Jeffrey Sachs on programs to improve the health, agriculture and economy of a village nearby. She's financing—to the tune of about $1 million—a documentary about the plight of children there. And she has met with Bill Clinton to see if they can work together to bring low-cost medicinesto the area, as well as partnering with several aid organizations. This, mind you, is all before Madonna has ever even set foot in Africa. (She plans to go in October.)

Exclusive: Madonna Speaks About Her "Big, Big Project" [Time]