The single vs double debate predates sin, and bores us just as much. We've heard it all before, usually from some bitter singular, but yet it continues to find adherents. The freshest interjection comes from gay teen website puffta.co.uk, in which Jesse Trautmann laments the annihilation of countless friendships due to commingling.

Trautmann's especially exasperated when his friends opt to stay, leaving him to troll for poon alone. After ranting through a seemingly endless essay, Trautmann concludes with schadenfreude:

Sure I’m pissed off now, but if a good friend ever has to move back into his bachelor apartment after a break-up, I’ll be the first one there to help him move back in. That’s what friends are for. Ain’t no boyfriend can offer that.

You know what, Trautmann, you're right! When we break up with our boyfriends we'll ring our pathetic, lonely friends to help us move. That will save us the trouble of reading the eulogies for their self-respect. Don't worry, babe, your prince will come, or you'll at least find more constructive venues for your talents. Hmm, coming from us that sounds nearly as feckless as his essay.

Single and Lonely Seeks Life, Meaning [Puffta.co.uk]