Rosie Breaks Contract, Runs For Cover

Rosie O’Donnell couldn’t handle all the on-stage (and back-stage) battles at The View. ABC has announced that the lesbian comedienne will not be completing her contract, which was meant to expire on June 30th. President of daytime programming Brian Frons released a statement,

We had hoped that Rosie would be with us until the end of her contract three weeks from now, but Rosie has informed us that she would like an early leave. Therefore, we part ways, thank her for her tremendous contribution to The View and wish her well.

He went on to say, “She may be a loudmouth monster, but she kept our show in the news. We’re all fucked.”

Meanwhile, Barbara Walters – The View‘s mama and O’Donnell’s original champion – told concerned citizens:

I brought Rosie to the show. Rosie contributed to one of our most exciting and successful years at The View. I am most appreciative. Our close and affectionate relationship will not change.

For her part, O’Donnell insists she loves her co-hosts, even Elisabeth Hasselbeck and enjoyed her time making headlines, making enemies and making dough.

Now, it’s back to the unemployment line. And poor Hasselbeck can finally unclench her asshole!

Rosie O’Donnell Out at `The View’ [SF Chronicle]