Remember when Willam went home for “breaking the rules” last week? And remember all of those questions we had? And remember how they turned those questions into PR buzz, a well-choreographed interview circuit and a video of Willam reading Tweets for five minutes?
Nope. I definitely don’t remember any of that. But Dida Ritz had a Freudian slip on the matter, “No one’s ever been kicked off in the history of RuPaul’s Drag Race. I’m gagged!”
I think she means gag-ordered?
Aaaanyway. The girls celebrate Willam’s departure by chanting “goodbye shady bearded lady,” making glitter angels (right), and then reenacting the infamous main stage scene. Sharon uses her RuPaul shirt as a makeshift costume; Phi Phi vomits glitter while donning a wig and a wig-beard.
But enough about that fifth-runner up. You’re now entering a Willam-free safe space. Proceed with smiles.
For the mini-challenge, Ru tells the girls, “You need to stand tall by decorating a pair of platform shoes.” Well, I guess it’s been a while since our last craft-tacular competition, and this one comes with a heavy-handed dose of Absolut cross-promotion! Goody.
The girls are assigned a theme, handed their materials and are given 20 minutes to “design” platform shoes.
Phi Phi pulls inspiration from the Chiquita Banana woman’s vomit. And Sharon, for no apparent reason, serves us some Navajo (or is that Nava-hoe?) realness with shoes sporting desert rocks and “nightmare catchers.”
Jeffery Moran, the mostly-silent marketing person for Absolut, sort of just stands there while RuPaul announces Phi Phi as the winner. Hmm. Okay?
I find this year’s Absolut commercial on Drag Race to be seizure-inducing, so perhaps Phi Phi’s design was the most “on brand.”
NEXT: An appearance from … Dan Savage?