Frenemies! Duets! Major twist! Disqualification! Then, the producers clarify… nothing! Untucked is where they clarify… also nothing! Do I have the secret answers detailing the rules a contestant broke that sent her packing!? Read on and find out!
Sorry, I’ll get on with it.
Our six remaining girls come singin’ and dancin’ into the workroom where Jiggly’s novel-sized farewell message is scrawled across the mirror. How am I supposed to read this? There’s even a tissue stuck at the bottom. Seriously, save some for the less-fortunate queens.
Willam finishes cleaning duty, and instead of reflecting on being in the bottom two, it becomes about how she just tries to be pretty and sparkly.
Sharon chimes in with, “Miu Miu doesn’t make talent, honey.” Oh, snap!
For the mini-challenge, which isn’t really a challenge, Ru reveals that she’s not looking for a winner or a loser—she’s looking for the truth. Our girls are taking a polygraph test! And the man who administers every lie detector test on every reality show ever, John Grogan, makes his Drag Race debut. I guess someone had to balance Jonathan Clay Harris’ hotness from last week.
The most asked question is, “If ______ were the last ladyboy on earth, would you kai kai with her?”
Sharon would kai kai with Phi Phi.
Phi Phi would not kai kai with Sharon.
And everyone would kai kai with Latrice.
The biggest shocker? Everyone admits to liking RuPaul’s Iron Fist line of shoes! I think this might be a new low in product integration. It’s one thing to have your shoes as an available accessory for challenges; it’s another to strap your contestants in and poke at them until you get an answer you can effectively splice together.
Drat. I’m all wound up.
I like the premise of this lie-detector challenge. Though not as original as WTF Wrestling, it’s at least original to Drag Race. The editing just reeks of manufacturing. Every time a queen gives her response, they cut to Grogan holding up his “true/not true” sign.
Not one response is done without a cut.
Maybe they wanted to speed up the pacing? Whatever. I shouldn’t get picky about the “reality” of reality television, but it’s a mini-challenge about telling the truth! The producers should have to along play, too.
The Sharon/Phi Phi pairing gives us the chance to replay clips from “Party City/Tired Showgirl Bitch-Off 2012.” But watching their show come together is painful; Phi Phi keeps insisting that singing in opera is funny, and Sharon tries this rocker/yelling situation that my ears still haven’t recovered from.
RuPaul reveals to the girls that they’ll be also evaluated as teams: one pair wins, and one lip-synchs for their lives.
Sharon says it best, “Why RuPaul? Why are you doing this to us?!”
The adorable (and Grammy-nominated) producer/composer Lucian Piane (right), who wrote the song specifically for the show, does his best to tell the pairs to “work on knowing your lyrics and cues” in a dozen different ways.
They all struggle. They all get flustered.
Chad worries about not looking professional. And thankfully Phi Phi and Sharon back down from their operatic/shouting oncoming train concept.
Before the girls hit the main stage, though, Willam is uncharacteristically quiet. She’s actually… not fighting for attention. She claims that, “it has nothing to do with [the show].” It’s something personal.
Personal? Gasp! Are they not living a perfect Drag Race bubble where their only form of outside communication comes from winning mini-challenges? Something smells fishy (and not the Kenya Michaels kind of fishy).
Willam and Latrice kill it. They come out with matching parasols, sharp lyrics (“at least my mustache don’t show!”), and Latrice sends Willam crashing to the floor by throwing some fabric in her direction.
Bravo.
Phi Phi and Sharon (left) have great… costumes? Sharon is a devil. Phi Phi is an angel. But their performance is in its own circle of hell. Not funny. Not good.
They did get one backhanded compliment from Pamela: “I loved their voices together—but I’m tone deaf.”
Girl, I have no idea why you’re judging and I don’t care. Just keep speaking words.
Dida and Chad do a fine job. They play the ingénue / veteran perspective. Very Roxi and Velma from Chicago. And Dida finally—finally!—has bigger hair, so the heavens open up and start to sing with praises.
The results of best and worst teams are no surprise.
Top two: Willam and Latrice
Bottom two: Sharon and Phi Phi
While standing in the back to bask in their victory, Willam starts turning a little green and then vomits Absolut cocktails on the stage. This isn’t a tiny in-mouth puke: home girl is on her knees and blowing chunks on a defenseless stage light. Not cute. Not funny.
And then without a pause for cleanup, we proceed to the lip-synch: Sharon vs. Phi Phi. Good vs. Evil. Devil vs. Angel. Party City vs. Tired-Ass Show Girl. The song is “It’s Raining Men (The Sequel)” performed by Martha Wash and RuPaul.
We’ve not seen either of these girls lip-synch, so I’m somewhat fearful for Sharon.
Phi Phi loses her wig in the first five seconds (did she not learn from Dragtona Beach?), but that doesn’t keep her from doing high-energy back bends and incessant shaking.
Sharon plays well to her comedy; her neck moves in mysterious ways. Plus, girl can scoot across a stage plenty well. Advantage—I think, I hope, I pray to those bejeweled horns—goes to Sharon.
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Is “not getting sloppy drunk” one of their rules? Or did she get wasted because she knew she was being sent home this week?
Was she smuggling in expensive shoes between episodes? Or maybe fraternizing the producers? So. Many. Questions. Let the wild theories begin!
The show released a statement via NewNowNext blog:
“During the filming of the fourth season of RuPaul’s Drag Race, it was brought to the producers [sic] attention that Willam had not complied with the rules as set forth in his competition contract. As a result, and in fairness to the other contestants, Willam was forced to leave the show. This issue will be addressed in the upcoming reunion special.”
Oh, crafty PR people. How craftily you craft your little words. There’s a huge difference between “addressing” an issue and “explaining” it. Untucked already did a great job of extending/addressing this vagueness for thirty minutes. So why wait until the end of the season? It’s rather easy to explain issues right now—that’s why God invited Twitter. Here, let me help:
“Willam got drunk on Absolut cocktails. Sorry ‘bout it. #AbsolutHatesVomit #CrossPromoFail”
“Willam conspired to split the winnings. Yes, the rules from Survivor also apply. Good luck on Drag Race All-Stars!”
“Willam did this Chick-Fil-A video thingy, and we’re all level-four vegans. #MeatIsMurder #ShashayAway”
All under 140 characters. Copy. Paste. Addressed. You’re welcome.
Next week the girls Frock the Vote. It looks like a political version of Snatch Game, and the guest judges are Dan Savage and—goodness really?!—Absolut vodka spokesperson Jeffrey Moran. Is he here to defend their brand after Willam’s pukefest? Dan, please overshadow him.
If Jason Sweeten were the last reality TV recapper on earth, would you kai kai with her?
Chris
Whatever happened, Phi Phi has anger issues.
Frederick
Phi Phi is a nasty bitch. She should also be kicked off the show since she tried to bribe Latrice with her cruise tickets (the prize from the previous episode’s win)into deliberately losing this week’s competition so Willam would have to lipsynch against Latrice and (presumably) lose and be sent home. I seriously doubt attempting to bribe a fellow contestant into “throwing” the competition is permitted in their contract either. Phi Phi NEEDS to go bye,bye!
Chris
@Frederick: Well, that may have been a joke. Latrice took it as such in any case.
zephyr with a Z
This episode was definitely more interesting than some of the ones from season 4. Phi Phi needs to go, like Chad said during the Untucked. Speaking of Chad, she is starting to get a little predictable and boring, hope she can turn it out and stay in the running. I am still liking Latrice and Sharon and think they will wind up top 3, I was thinking Chad but lately I am not so sure.
And sorry, Jason, you’re adorable but you were off again in your editing, like you were two weeks ago. A few rearranged words which is pretty minor, but you called it “realty television” on page 2, spelled Lucian’s last name wrong on page 3 (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lucian_Piane) and referenced the “main stag” on page 4. I don’t mean to come across as the grammar police, but aren’t you a copywriter? Check, double-check, THEN press send, whether you get paid to write these articles or are just doing it because you’re a fan too. Cheers.
Michael B
@Frederick: Yah, that was clearly a joke. The show is notorious for editing things in a sneaky way to make you think one way.
Jeremy
This episode is so shady like that bitch Phi-phi. She should be the one to go. Anyway, that cutie Lucian Piane, is he on our team or what?
QJ201
Wasn’t it said on “Untucked” that Willam was doing things that “could get us all into trouble?”
Either way, the bitch now has the “name recognition” she was after to build her career.
stevoj
i don’t know what hurts worse. the fact that my favorite Willam was kicked off for cheating, or the fact that had she stayed Phi Phi would have been axed
we all saw that lip-sync and Sharon won that by a clear margin. EVERYTHING Phi Phi does is cringe worthy
Tuckaboo
@zephyr with a Z: get a hobby.
indi.anna
Rupaul peddles transphobia, we know it we have for sometime. Unfortunately the cis queer community ignores our concerns (AGAIN) Rupaul is cis, Rupaul is a gay man not trans. Rupaul at some point will be put in a situation where “he” has to defend himself because we are watching and we always get our transphobe. ALWAYS. Watch this space. Ru is not trans*. Shutup Ru.
STOP TRANSPHOBIA NOW
Ray
@indi.anna: You said it yourself Ru is a gay man and a drag queen. Why exactly are we all expected to bend over backwards for transgenders and cross dressers when most of you don’t have any use for the gay community until you want something?
Shannon1981
@indi.anna: You have been trolling this site accusing gay people of transphobia for a week now and most of us are sick of it. Drag is a long standing tradition in the gay community, and it isn’t done to make fun of trans people. I myself am a drag king(when I get the opportunity to do it, that is), and you’re a self absorbed idiot if you really believe that drag is to make fun of trans people.
Sozo
Sad Willam is gone. He was a fucking riot. I didn’t peg him for the win but he helped make season 4 the best. I would actually be happy with Latrice, Sharon or Chad winning. I could take Dita. I would shoot myself in the head before that cunt Phi Phi wins. God, just a mean girl.
Shannon1981
On a side note, Ru should start including kings. I’d audition.
huh?
@indi.anna:
CIS?
Is that as in “sissy?”
Speak English, bitch.
yneemee
The show is so mean spirited lately – I thought we were supposed to be against bullying behaviour but what Phi Phi was doing was being a bully bitch – clenching her fists and all and trying to bribe a fellow contestant
Ru, is this any way to set any kind of example for our youth let alone any non-gays who watch… talk about stereotyping and boorish behavour
Texndoc
Yep, as you said I saw next week that Dan Savage is a guest and the preview on the Logo page is a riot. They have to I guess play politicians and the following dialogue occurs:
RuPaul: “Sharon, will you be the type politician who slings mud at her opponent?”
Sharon Needles: “No. I was bullied a lot growing up. So, No.”
Dan Savage: “Well, all politicians say that until they go down a little in the polls.”
Sharon Needles: “But I LIKE to go down on little poles!”
Both Ru and Dan howl. THIS is why Sharon must win. She is always on cue and hilarious.
what?
miu miu?
zephyr with a Z
@Tuckaboo: looks like they fixed it. I’ll get another, thanks
jj
Im thinking maybe she was on hormones and thats why she got kicked out. If she is pre-op then it would make sense. It would give her an unfair advantage against the other ladies for sure.
Shannon1981
@jj: I thought Drag Race is for drag queens, not trans women.
uh oh
@indi.anna:
Its time to take the T out of LGBT. Not sure why it’s there to begin with. Sexual orientation =/= gender identity.
Clearly there is no one in the LGB community that represents T issues in the way that trans people want them to.
Feel free to go your own way and find your own advocates for your cause.
jormol90201
Who the frock cares!!!! The Bitch is gone thats all I care about……Although this is a super shock and all I totally thought the top 3 Gurls would have been William, Sharon Needles and Chad Michaels> I love Miss Phi Phi O’Hara but gurl she needs some make up tips she is a HOT Mess!!! So what I think WIllam did is probably do some drugs to alter her ego drugs that make you not eat . Drugs Are Bad!! I thought you knew I dont know how about someone get a damn copy of the contract so we can see what rule she broke. Bye bye so long Willam!! Good Riddance!!
Kevin
She had a cell phone. That’s all it was.
John
Phi Phi here is the low down Willam has a career he has done film and TV as well as having his own band, the money he spends on his gear is his own, he earned it. And your credits are…??????. Yep show girl who does a bad Gaga. Willam and Needles are the future of drag. you cannot just lip sink to make it girl you have to have talent. I think your green eyed monster is showing Willam is hotter,has a better bod, and is a polished performer.
Ans stop stabbing your sisters in the back cause it will all come back to haunt you.
condeguy
@uh oh: your remarks are so out of line anyway if you’re looking for a role model on tv, good luck!
Spike
Willam is def the future of Drag. No apologies Mean Girl, and it’s all and act. At this point RPDR has become as forgettable as ANTM, the shelf life of the participants is about 5 minutes and 10 minutes for the winner, then on to the next cycle.
Willam managed to get A LOT of air time on the episode and went out in a way that will be referred to for years, winning the challenge, barfing and disqualified all in the last 15 mins. of the show. The dude has done tons of TV and doesn’t play by the rules that the other tired queens abide by. None of this happened by accident, he played RuPaul big time.
And the only reason anyone will watch the reunion show will be for Willam and why he was disqualified.
Pazmateo
It’s Miu Miu for Christ’s sake. I couldn’t help it.
Mark
“Willam has done tons of TV”
What crap. 3 second walk throughs? She was irritating from the first show and had a beard. How embarrassing the biggest celebrity name dropper stood there puking out her guts in front of probably the biggest celebrity so far, Pamela Anderson. Oh Willam. No party invites for you from Pamela.
Mark
It has got to be WIllam posting the I’m bigger than RuPaul crap. Hey girl.
ScaryRussianHeather
@Mark:
You’re wrong, check his IMDB. He has almost 50 entries (titles) and over 20 are TV including 5 episodes as a well known character Cherry Peck on Nip Tuck. You don’t get an entry on IMBD if you’re an “extra” or a 3 second walk on. In fact Sex In The City isn’t on there because he didn’t have a character on that show. He even stated he has no idea whey the show kept focusing on that particular name drop because he name dropped much better roles like Nip Tuck. You know the show is EDITED, right?
And Queerty, you missed the main point of the episode, where the queens all were complaining about Willam getting away with something that would “make them all look bad” by doing something prohibited in the contract. Willam has stated that he was open about what he was doing (to the show) and they finally decided to act on it.
ScaryRussianHeather
@indi.anna:
What needs to “STOP” is nouveau ~trans ~activists who don’t know their history. RuPaul has been the biggest supporter of the ALL permutations of trans fill-in-the-blank labels and gender variance for over 25 years – and yours is just ONE of them.
Crossdressers,transvestites, drag queens, genderqueer, intersex, pan, the list goes on forever and they’ve all used the term trans as they please, you don’t own it. They dress as they please when and how they please, it’s called freedom.
In fact you’re the one behind the times. You know that Native Americans recognized third gender, the two spirit gender SLIGHTLY longer than RuPaul has been around, right? And several of today’s drag queens AND normal everyday not famous people identify with that gender.
Make up a new term if you don’t like sharing the one you’ve co-opted.
Texndoc
I always found Willam just as, if not more, irritating than PhiPhi. Have to admit I felt sorry for Willam as she had to stand outside the door hearing even single other contestant including hearts-of-gold Chad and Latrice saying they wish she was gone. Chad and Latrice! That’s like your own mamma backslapping you.
J A
HEY! I think John Grogan is Hot!!! Poor William I feel sorry for her. The Queens said t hey know what she did and they ALL had been doing the same thing!!! So what gives?!
Frederick
@jormol90201.Member-I can’t believe you’d defend that mean-spirited, conniving bitch, Phi Phi. Willam would’ve definitely made the top three, if he hadn’t broken his contract rules. I think the top three would’ve been Willam, Sharon Needles, and (possibly) Latrice or Chad Michaels. Phi Phi should’ve been gone along time ago!