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Secret Unicorn Names Of Famous LGBTs REVEALED!!!

We were about to call this new Unicorn Name Generator complete bullshit—it gives most people the unicorn last name of “Nostrils” and is horribly cis-gendered—but then when we started plugging in the names of famous LGBT people, we got a bunch of kickass results like Bluebell Pretty Mane and Buttercup Silky Lady. Plus, the generator even gives you a small bio—Buttercup is a little bit crazy. She is has a mane as silky as a cat’s tail, and she changes the weather. That’s like the poetic equivalent of a Lisa Frank binder (pictured right). So what are Oscar Wilde’s and Lorraine Hansberry’s secret unicorn names?

Langston Hughes, black Harlem Renaissance poet
Quince Sparkle Nostrils
Quince is a very clever horse with deep, mysterious eyes.
He is as sparkley as the milkyway,
and he dances in clouds of falling stars.

George Takei, Asian actor
Sorrel Fair Reins
Sorrel is mischievous and nosey.
He is handsome to look upon,
and he casts mischievous spells.

Oscar Wilde, Irish author
Hemlock Darling Stallion
Hemlock is often very naughty and is always being told off.
He is a darling horse, spotty like a dalmation,
and he dances on the spindrift as the tides change.

Simone de Beauvoir, bisexual French philosopher
Bluebell Pretty Mane
Bluebell is an eccentric genius with a big imagination.
She is as pretty as a picture,
and she casts love spells.

Chaz Bono, transgender advocate
Burdock Lovely Pony
Burdock is quick-witted and sparky.
He is as lovely as the day is long,
and he brings the sunshine and chases away clouds.

Rosie O’Donnell, lesbian philanthropist and comedienne
Buttercup Silky Lady
Buttercup is a little bit crazy.
She is has a mane as silky as a cat’s tail,
and she changes the weather.

Lorraine Hansberry, black authoress of Raisin in the Sun
Quince Sparkle Lord
Quince is a very clever horse with deep, mysterious eyes.
He is as sparkley as the milkyway,
and he changes the weather.

Link via AfterElton

By:           Daniel Villarreal
On:           Jun 6, 2011
Tagged: , , , , , , ,
  • 4 Comments
    • Joey Carson
      Joey Carson

      “My unicorn name is Sunflower Charming Lord. Sunflower is kind and caring. He is charming and cheerful, and he changes the weather.”

      Jun 7, 2011 at 12:03 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Adonis-of-Fire
      Adonis-of-Fire

      Mine is “Champion Pretty Hooves”
      He is very lucky and always succeeds
      He is as pretty as a picture and likes tap dancing on rooftops

      Jun 7, 2011 at 4:06 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Melgar
      Melgar

      Hello, It is a pleasure being here. I am glad that I am gay that God accepts me of who I am that I am blessed of having a family who loves me the way I am, and whose friends also accept me who I am and also neighbors who accept me who I am. I am thankful to God for all of the blessings and for his bountiful blessings he has given unto me. God has been always good with me. He has never forsaken me and has granted me goodly parents and also Mormon church has always accepted me as a gay man in the church and I have been always been welcome. I give my testimony that Jesus lives and died for me that Jesus is the Christ, and that He loves me so much and dearly above anyone than anyone that Jesus is crazy about me and for me. I give thanks to God for his love and his great mercies he has given me and because God prefers me than anyone even I am gay. I testify this is true that God is my witness and God loves me and that I love Jesus Christ more than all of you and that God loves me more than anyone here on earth. I give my testimony this is true, I say in Jesus’s name, amen.
      P.S.
      Everyone is good because Jesus loves us and Jesus is nice because we are all saved and thanks to the Cross of Jesus we are saved and one of us is lost.

      Jan 14, 2012 at 7:55 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Prelablejem
      Prelablejem

      Tufford Construction is ready to deal with any of your home improvements! If you are a resident on Santa Maria, CA and would like any kind of remodeling, from kitchen remodeling to bathroom remodeling, we are sure we can help you! Call us for a consultation, quote and general contractor services. Check out http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mib5cvE5fIA.

      Jun 26, 2012 at 7:04 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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