Security At San Francisco Airport Gets “Frisky” With Monumentally Hung Man
Last week, Jonah Falcon got stopped by TSA agent at San Francisco International Airport concerned about the suspiciously large bulge in his pants. Of course, concern turned into mortification when they discovered that bulge was actually Falcon’s 9-inch penis.
Falcon, 41, has the largest penis on record—9 inches flaccid and 13.5 inches when erect. Pilot to co-pilot: We’re going down in flames!
When Falcon first passed through security, he says one of the guards asked if his pockets were empty. “Another guard stopped me and asked me if I had some sort of growth,” Falcon told the Huffington Post.
The well-endowed New York said a young TSA agent interpreted the armadillo in his trousers as “a biological threat.”
Only if you’re trying to swallow it, honey.
Falcon explained the guard gave him a full pat down, “but made sure to go around [my penis] with his hands. They even put some powder on my pants, probably a test for explosives. I found it amusing.”
We’re not cowed by Falcon’s girthy growth—after all its not the size of the plane but how well it flies.
The only thing Jonah is looking for is grounds for a good press release.
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Ugh Jonah Falcon is a professional media wh0re and thinks he’s somehow “famous” because he’s horse hung. I agree with Lifer he doesn’t care about anything else. Also queerty Jonah is bisexual so why not put that as a hashtag?
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too bad he isn’t actually sexy, then the story might actually be interesting
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This gave me one hell of a laugh…thx for the post Queerty
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Um? And that’s what he wore to the airport – cycle shorts? No!
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too bad he’s too fat and ugly to be a porn star
eww
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Look, I know the size queens will fight me on this, but there is such a thing as “too big.” And Mr. Falcon, I’m afraid fits the bill.
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Let’s point out that this guy has the largest penis “ON RECORD”. The fact that he’s chosen to go on record with this speaks volumes. Not that he’s not large – even too large – but I doubt he really has the world’s biggest, as he’s trying to claim.
What’s also kind of sad is that TSA agents have to go AROUND whatever someone says is their penis. When you frisk people, touch their penis! Are they any less likely to have something hidden there than then do along their arms or legs? Not that I’m for overzealous security, but this is really taking american prudery to another level, don’t you all think?
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No. 12 · mike128 wrote, “What’s also kind of sad is that TSA agents have to go AROUND whatever someone says is their penis. When you frisk people, touch their penis! Are they any less likely to have something hidden there than then do along their arms or legs? Not that I’m for overzealous security, but this is really taking american prudery to another level, don’t you all think?”
It is not prudery, but fear of a lawsuit for sexual harassment.
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@Andrew: He didn’t wear bicycle shorts. That’s a photo taken from another media series; elsewhere, it’s credited to JMG, but I’m not sure of the original source. I’ve read the story at other sites and what’s missing is that Falcon claimed that he told the officers that the growth was his “dick” and that he has decided that it would be easier to wear bicycle shorts in the future. His attempt at a humorous tag line to Huffpost was: “…You’d think the San Francisco TSA would have had experience with hung guys before, but I guess not.”
I wonder if it really happened or if he wore his clothes, just so, so that he could get a press release out of it. It’s certainly been a successful PR move as he’s all over the web.
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@louis t.: Well, if he’s that big at 41, he was also that big at 18, and probably figured he didn’t have to work on any other areas of himself. As John Holmes, Scott O’Hara and Kip Noll proved long earlier, determined size queens will make a star out of you, no matter what kind of double-bagger you are above the neck.
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ARE YOU KIDDING ME???? HE IS BY ———————FAR——————— NOT LL THAT “WELL HUNG”………I SEE BIGGER IN MY LOCAL GYM………..PLEASE STOP THIS…………EITHER SOMEONE HERE IS THE “SEXIEST MAN ALIVE” OR THE MOST WELL HUNG MAN ALIVE……….LOLOLOL
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I have had the same experience just like that man who has gone to the airport. With me, it was a different case, that it happened in Starbucks, that cops surrounded were like crazy and paranoid and there was such a great paranoia as though it was the end of the world. Believe me. I was scared because I did not know what it was going on. I thought it must be the surprise. At the contrary, the cops arrested me and the woman came and touched my private parts and I felt hurt and I felt she broke my private members of my body. It hurts. Since, I was upset of this case. He is not the only guy who has experienced in this case. I am also the one who has also the same experience. I imagine that some others guys may have experienced the same case just like this guy and me. It could be the same experience may be in Russia or Europe. Now, this guy is good to be a porno star to be only in Russia areas or places such Slovenia, Armenia, Croatia or places such these European areas. I cannot be a porno star because I am not sexy. Well, I can also have big penis but it does not mean I will be a porno star. I have got to be very beautiful and perfect and good symmetry. Thanks for taking the time. Adonai is with you.
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“We’re not cowed by Falcon’s girthy growth—after all its not the size of the plane but how well it flies.”
Couldn’t agree more. My experience? The bigger the guy–the crappier the sex. Just because they’re hung they think they’ve done everything they need to do. No technique at all.
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@shannon: If you see bigger than 13″ at your local gym, a lot of people will want to know what gym you go to. And not to bother you, either.
@cminca: @cminca: In the same way, there are a lot of cars and buildings that are fun to see, but wouldn’t actually be fun and/or practical to drive or live in.
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Well it might SEEM humorous, this man has got excellent grounds for a lawsuit.
He should really follow up on that.
Or… maybe… after a quick google search, it might NOT be quite so easily done as I thought.
Even so, the guys at TSA really should be pointed at laughed at for being such big fools as all that.
Should he have just ‘exposed’ himself?
It seems as if that was what they were really after.