“Vanilla or spice, no chocolate nor rice.”
“NO ORIENTALS!!!”
“Is there a block all black button?”
“Asians, prease reave me arone.”
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
“Just a preference. Sorry!!”
These are just a few of the lines vlogger Davey Wavey uncovered on various men’s Grindr profiles. He asked five guys, including MTV’s Todrick Hall, of varying ages and backgrounds to read the profiles aloud and share their thoughts. The end result may be one of his most thoughtful, most important videos yet.
Check it out and share your thoughts in the comments below…
Related stories:
This Gay Couple Was Targeted By Antigay, Racist Trolls. Here’s How They Proved Love Always Wins.
BJ McFrisky
Stating that you have “just a preference” is rac1st?
Holy shit, we really have stumbled down the rabbit hole, haven’t we?
guyingpp
Is a guy on grindr saying that they’re not into women sexist too?
Masc Pride
Dramatic! These are pretty over-the-top examples that are so uncommon it probably wasn’t worth a whole video. Obviously r-cism isn’t nice…but I still LOL’ed a “Reave me arone”. There actually is a “block all black button” if you custom search by r@ce. You can’t do it on Grindr but every other gay hookup site has r@ce options in the search options. So if I’m looking specifically for a white, brown-eyed, 6″ tall, 180 pound, muscular, HIV negative, Taurus in my area, I can search for just that. We’re always eager to shame and reprimand each other, but maybe the sites should share some of the blame here.
Was being a giant flamer a requirement to be in this video? It’s borderline offensive to label this video “Gay Guys React…”. They should have shown a wider variety of gay men. Diversity isn’t limited to r@ce.
moldisdelicious
Well if you’re desperate enough to look for anybody to have sex with, this is what you get.
bnard620
Im assuming those that are defending this also are the one’s who have profiles somewhat like this.
moldisdelicious
@Masc Pride:
Think the only thing offensive is your use of the word flamer sharing your self hating, internalized homophobia. All these gay dudes that seem to want to drag other gay folks down with them instead of just keeping their misery to themselves. It’s embarassing.
AtticusBennett
@Masc Pride: show yourself then, so we can all see the big manly masc man you pretend to be.
oh wait…you can’t. because you’re not manly nor masc nor capable of having the balls to represent yourself.
Ronnyboy
@AtticusBennett: God girl give it a break. Not everyone want’s to post their pictures but that doesn’t mean your opinion is automatically better.
Most in the video were effeminate and no there’s nothing wrong with it. For once it made davy wavy actually look kind of normal.
Ronnyboy
@moldisdelicious: Did you forget to finish your thought there bud because that makes zero sense.
Ronnyboy
@Masc Pride: Davy wavy picked them out around where he lives. Young, gay and living in the weho ghetto and you get a bigger % of effeminate guys.
AtticusBennett
@Ronnyboy: if they care about representation, they’d show themselves. alas, closeted wimps always complain about others while doing nothing themselves. they’re broken for life.
Masc Pride
@moldisdelicious: I think the mold has gone to your brain.
dickrichard
@Ronnyboy: One of the guys is Toddrick Hall, who is know far and wide for his fabulous and pro-everything music videos: asking him about racism is like asking the Westboro Bapist church about homos; you will get a long and emotional answer that really only considers one party of the controversy, and is completely blind to any nuances.
Masc Pride
@Ronnyboy: Oh, that explains a lot. It’s just that these guys are so flaming they make Davey Wavey look like John Cena, so I found it ironic that this obvious plug for diversity seems to lack diversity.
JerseyMike
Who gives a ….?? Racism will never go away. Im a black man who LOVES black men.. so I could care less about what others think.. No, don’t think its ok to be hateful and rude but it just shows who they are.. Its not a reflection on me or anyone they hate. The only ones crying are the men of color who chase after white peen.. Honey they don’t want you so move the f@#k on..lol
Xzamilio
@guyingpp: No, that means they are gay… this stupid retort is about as overused and player out as “What, are we gonna let men marry dogs now that gays can marry?”
Ronnyboy
@Masc Pride: I live in N Hollywood and come down to Weho occasionally. Think of a whole city populated by Toddrick Halls and you’ll understand it. It’s good every now and then for my amusement.
Ronnyboy
@JerseyMike: The two most popular clubs in Weho have a black and hispanic night only every so often. I used to go at first but it got old as I was completely ignored. That pissed me off! Oh wait nevermind. It’s all good:-)
Masc Pride
@Xzamilio: Just because you say so? It’s not like women are another species. The profiles highlighted by this video are obviously meant to be outrageous (and may even be made up like Whisper memes), but as far as what guyingpp is saying, the whole LGB message is let people “love” who they want. It’s rather hypocritical for gay people to start preference-shaming.
JerseyMike
@Ronnyboy: Exactly!! Its all good.. What one don’t like another one will. I have never been short of dates, bf, fb.
Giancarlo85
The anti-fem bigotry here is alive and well. I’m sure people like MaskDouchebag are cheering the result in Houston. Better to live in the closet and being a perpetual closetcase brownnoser.
You can keep your internalized bigotry and hatred to yourself. Our community has a lot of the same problems as society at large. It’s so funny people are being r*a*c*i*s*t and given a pass by our typical right wing trolls. Maybe if you had a brain you would realize it.
@Masc Pride: Why don’t you just say it? Was being a f*ggot a requirement to be in this video?
I love it when hypocrites use anti-gay language bigots use. So shameful.
@Ronnyboy: As someone who has lived in LA for about a decade, I don’t think you have the slightest CLUE about this city or West Hollywood for that matter.
You do realize there are several gay clubs that target mainly Latinos? OH wait… you don’t live in this city, so you don’t have a clue.
And yeah… people weren’t paying attention to you? Oh, how sad. Nobody wants to look at you. Get over yourself.
Giancarlo85
By the way, if you really lived in North Hollywood, you would realize there is a gay club there that is almost exclusively Latino.
http://www.clubcobrala.com/v2/index.php
Been there more times than I can count.
Giancarlo85
@Ronnyboy: “Most in the video were effeminate and no there’s nothing wrong with it. For once it made davy wavy actually look kind of normal.”
Awesome attitude to have! So effeminate gay men are not normal? Yeah “nothing wrong with it”, yet you basically called them abnormal. You’re just about as ridiculously pathetic as it comes.
Ronnyboy
@Giancarlo85: Actually, I know of the club since I’ve been there more than once. I only live two miles away from it. One of these day it would be nice to meet you there. I have to admit I’m very curious after reading so many of your fire brand opinionated comments. Like would that carry over into your personal life. Lol
Giancarlo85
@Ronnyboy: I wouldn’t care to meet you. Like you said… if you really lived in LA, you would get ignored. I’d be one more who would ignore you. 🙂 But yea when you walk out don’t let the door hit you.
Ronnyboy
@Giancarlo85: I was only going by the strictest definition of it. “conforming to a standard; usual, typical, or expected.”
Giancarlo85
I’ve even been to a small club called “Cocobongo” in Reseda. Yeah… Reseda out of all places. It’s a neat little club… something it’s cool just to hang out with my friends there and the only language we talk is in Spanish.
If people think LA doesn’t have diverse clubs and is all gay white boy land… wrong.
Giancarlo85
@Ronnyboy: You left that up to interpretation and successfully marginalized many people. Stop making excuses.
moldisdelicious
@Ronnyboy: I think I make perfect sense. Not my fault some of you gay dudes are dumb and shallow where your thought process is limited to what your eyes can see.
Masc Pride
Just for the record, I haven’t and don’t use the word faggot. Flamer, queen, princess, etc. are all used in a far more jocular manner.
I got a bad spasm in my arm at the gym a few days ago. I literally had to sit down because I couldn’t even move my arm for a good five minutes. My buddy (who is also bisexual) asked, “you okay, princess?” We both laughed about it. You guys take every little thing so personally. It’s really sad.
Ronnyboy
@Giancarlo85: Hmm…isn’t Cobra on Burbank? At any rate, I do very well when I’m there thank you. The hispanics love me:)
moldisdelicious
@Masc Pride:
Naw, you’re the dude that keeps voicing how insecure you are to the point where you even wrote it in your screenname instead of manning up and taking control of it. It’s not another mans job to make you secure with yourself and your sexuality. If it wasn’t an effeminate man that youre blaming your insecurities on, it would be something else that is centered around being gay. You’re not comfortable with being gay. That’s your issue. Do something about it instead of pushing it onto the next person.
I don’t even get how masculinity or femininity has to do with the subject of the video. You turned it into something that it wasn’t.
Stache99
@Masc Pride: Well, you’re friend is just a anti gay bigot then! Just kidding. Next time tell him to please use appropriate language to protect the sensitive.
Giancarlo85
@Masc Pride: Somebody could simply say “well I’m using faggot in a “jocular manner”. You are on here with the intention of degrading other people. You are one of the MOST insecure bigots on this website that you need to call other guys “flamers, queens, princesses”. This is just a set of insults.
@Ronnyboy: No kidding! I just posted the website. Hispanics don’t like you. You just said you were ignored when you go there. I can see why. Terrible attitude. You have a mentality where you must be the center of attention… sad everyone ignores you.
moldisdelicious
@JerseyMike:
Personally, as someone who is understanding how deeply ingrained white supremacist ideology is woven into this society, the best way to fight the bullshit is to not entertain it.
You’ll see many folks when it comes to these discussions about “race” which btw is a social construct created by some europeans back in the 1700s and also has no scientific basis either, will be ready to accuse those that question racism and it’s principles to “pulling the race card”. It’s usually an ignorant person that brings it up to shame those bringing up how bullshit race is. I would challenge folks to let go of the idea of race and people of color or anything circulated around that stupid concept. Race is only made to basically keep the descendants of europeans and europeans in control of the world. It’s safe to say that the biggest users of the idea of “race” are and have always been white people because it was created to benefit them while shitting on everybody who ain’t white. Don’t support white supremacy.
Masc Pride
@moldisdelicious: “Yawn* same self-loathing drivel, different day. So funny/hypocritical how you’re whining about gay people dragging each other down, yet you’re very quick to call other guys self-loathing and refer to gay guys on hookup apps as desperate (scroll up). What kind of misery and self-hate is behind your statements, hmmm? Step right down from that soapbox, buddy.
Giancarlo85
@moldisdelicious: He’s an unstable bigot who will use every word to describe other gay men. He uses the language to try to justify his own crappy personality. His crappy personality is more evident by the self hating nonsense he pushes onto others.
Bob LaBlah
With younger guys, race be damned, this is to be expected. What used to disgust me when I lived in NYC was when I would see guys in the gym who I know damn well remember me (just as I sure as hell remember them) from the days of the Mine Shaft, the Anvil, Kellers, Peter Rabbit…..working out as though they were still in their twenties with A4A, Grindr and other non-sensensical hookup site profiles claiming to be in their late thirties or early forties.
In reality not only are they in their mid-fifties but had many of the same bullshit profiles as well.
Hispanics ok as long as they are mixed but light-skinned, not into blacks, asia-minors (Indians, Pakistanis…) all kinds of stupid shit. I saw one queen walking in the village grinning so hard while looking at his cellphone (no doubt a hookup site but I can’t prove that but I have seen that hookup site smile many times before) he walked out into moving traffic and a car slammed on brakes to keep from hitting him.
I am so grateful I came along, out during the days when the art of face to face conversations and meetings for the first time took place in a bar, restaurant, book store. And they wonder why kids grow up narcissistic. I wonder how many of these people who literally place these “orders” for sex get turned down once they hookup with “Mr. Right” at the meeting spot. I bet more get turned down than actually have sex.
moldisdelicious
@Masc Pride:
You act like hookup apps are necessary when they are not. Just like people thinking it’s necessary going out their way to make themselves out to be assholes on these apps or you constantly playing dodgeball when people call you out on your bs. Time to come back in touch with reality.
moldisdelicious
@Giancarlo85:
Well stated, Giancarlo.
Xzamilio
@AtticusBennett: I don’t even bother addressing that guy anymore… if you don’t know the difference between superficial “preferences” limited to skin color and not being sexually attracted to WOMEN overall, then you’re disingenuous at least, or an idiot at most.
DDstar1me
No culture really likes Black People. I don’t understand why they hate black people so much. I’ve seen a lot of post with Asian’s and Latino’s that say no blacks. It’s ok to say what u prefer. what is so wrong with that? I love black men and usually only want to be with black men. However, sometimes I like latino men. who cares. I’m so sick of racism. It’s so played out.
why are we arguing about race yet again.
Masc Pride
Preferences for certain races (particularly your own) can be formed so early on in the subconscious that they can absolutely be just as natural as sexual orientation. Anyone who refuses to see that–simply because it negates the logic they think will shut further debate down–is a disingenuous idiot.
@moldisdelicious: Who died and made you the homo-Christ? If a guy wants to use an app to get off, it’s none of your business. You and that other psycho just want to control other guys, but you can’t, and that’s why you guys are so sensitive and angry all the time. Your outrage over “Masc” appearing in a screen name makes your insecurity accusations comical. Secure people aren’t so easily outraged by common words.
@Ronnyboy: See he squirmed his way out of meeting to converse in person? Atticus did the same thing when SeeingAll proposed a meet. They so clearly just want to sit on here and bitch at people. Bet you wouldn’t hear a people out of either face to face.
Creamsicle
This whole issue is really personal to me. I live in Santa Barbara where 80% of guys are looking for a white frat bro on the DL to live out their straight college bro fantasy. I’m an asian guy who isn’t super effeminate, but I’m pretty geeky and nerdy, so I’m not all about that “mascbro” life either. Putting these kinds of messages in your grindr (or any) profile just makes the entire local community seem hostile. Is it really so hard to ask for a face picture right away and then go from there? Are you really so busy that telling a guy, “sorry you’re not my type,” is harder to do than blatantly stating your “preference” using such negative terms? That’s my big problem with it. If you’re a young minority gay man and this is the only exposure you have to the “community” then you’re gonna feel pretty alone and intimidated. It’s a huge blow to someone’s self esteem to be barraged by the message that they are one of the undesirables based on something out of their control even before they make the first move.
Masc Pride
@Masc Pride: Edit: Bet you wouldn’t hear a peep out of either face to face.
DDstar1me
@ Creamsicle….awwww..you poor thing. Can you hear the violins in the background? No one gives a shit. Grow a pair and move on, is what they told me when I first moved to NYC.
Giancarlo85
@Masc Pride: OH really? Why would I meet him? What would be the reason for that? And would you ever MEET anyone on here you hateful prick? You spend so much time hating on here… I simply don’t see how you have any time for your own personal life. You are on here more than anyone else.
Notice how Ronnyboy simply vanished.
“Preferences for certain races (particularly your own) can be formed so early on in the subconscious that they can absolutely be just as natural as sexual orientation. ”
This is such nonsense.
You are nothing more than a hateful coward.
Giancarlo85
@DDstar1me: Aw you think racism is played out? Why don’t you take a look at this country for a change? You’ll know for a fact it isn’t “played out”.
@DDstar1me: Says the guy with no nuts at all.
moldisdelicious
@Masc Pride:
Lol. About the part about racial preferences being hard wired isnt true.
http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-flexibility-of-racial-bias/?utm_source=twitterfeed&utm_medium=twitter
You’re the one getting burnt out of shape because youre insecure. Just like how you tried to flip what I said about desperate people into it being about desperate men on grindr when I said “Well if you’re desperate enough to look for anybody to have sex with, this is what you get” in no part did I specifically say grindr or gay men.
Cagnazzo82
@BJ McFrisky: One thing having a ‘preference’.
Another thing being intentionally and explicitly hostile, like some of these profiles are.
Ronnyboy
@Giancarlo85: Probably because your a big puss. He’s right though. I 100% guarantee you wouldn’t say anything near as bad as that in my presence. The offer still stands though. I go there and you go there. I’d ask the bartender for someone named Carlos but I’m sure that would be a needle in a hay stack at that place.
Prove us both wrong and meet me.
ButtStuff
@Giancarlo85: Really? You want to see a terrible attitude? Like you’re so tolerant and understanding. I just spent an hour looking through old posts, so I could gather up a bunch of your awful comments. It was so easy, nightmarish, but easy. I can’t wait to see how you try to worm your way out of this. Boy, you have real problems.
These are all direct quotes… enjoy.
You have no social fucking skills and on top of that you have some kind of emotional problem, are you r etarded? Seriously, go fuck yourself.
You are not a psychologist and you fucking don’t know anything. You fat loser. I don’t have a fucking problem with Mexicans, you piece od shit I have lots of Mexican friends.
You are the one that is lying. You have no achievements. You are a ugly loser with no fucking life who needs to pass judgments onto others.
Crawl back under that rock and just die.
Seriously fuck you and fuck your pathetic life. You’ve already showed how much of a fucking loser you are.
I’m not telling anyone what to do, now go back and learned how to fucking read you piece of shit.
No Latino would ever fuck a fat g ringo loser like you. I make more money than some fat troll like you living in the poor south.
Pathetic tools like you just fucking climb on because you’re too fucking scared to be out in the open, shithead. Like Atticus said, your dad hates you.
The fact that you’re two ugly repugnant vicious assholes nobody wants to even date. You’re the dum fuck one demonstrating a superiority complex because you’re an arrogant egotistical twat.
When will you fucking die allready? I’m beautiful and your not get over it loser.
You’re an stupid fuck nasty person who hates all feminine gay men, you also don’t know how to read. Your mom was an alcoholic that’s why you’re so fucked up.
Your reading comprehension is just so fucking piss poor. You’re a fucking douchebag, that’s why I attack you.
Are you fucking kidding me, I hate you. Have you looked fucking at the mirror lately, you stupid fuck. And you can I read nor can you write in complete coherent sentences. You’re a total fucking buffoon.
I never fucking contradicted myself, I explained my rationale behind the statements I made, you just to stupid to read. You just suffer from reading comprehension issues, are you a r etard?
This just shows how much of a fucking brainless idiot troll you are. I never said that. YOUR A LIAR. You look like fucking idiots in the end and nobody likes idiots, FUCK YOU.
Dumb ass white people like you are so boring. You end up looking real ugly anyways as you age.
Yeah that just about says it all about how much of a condescending fucking douchebag you are and how much of a hypocrite you are. You are completely incapable of any rational fucking form of discussion.
And again… I’m not into shitty white guys at all. I can’t think of anything uglier than a fat white American redneck.
Why would I be chasing some ugly fat white loser like you? I’m sorry, but I like a slime and slender guy. I’m not into big American beer bellies. No offense.
He’s a total shit head hypocrite douchebag who tries to fling his own faults onto others, what a fucking loser. You will probably end up with HIV and being on coke.
Giancarlo85
@ButtStuff: Wow… that’s nice dear. You don’t even know how to write. How long did it take you to write all that garbage? Please, go back to the site you came from. You’re not wanted here. But you’re not wanted there either. I feel so bad for you.
You hate yourself. We get that already. No need to write up a long winded post with a variety of lame and unoriginal insults. Go back to trolling on that other site as you always do.
Giancarlo85
*Come up with all that garbage (which I never wrote).
Fantasy is fantasy. And yeah, you probably are on coke.
Seriously go GET A LIFE. You are beyond pathetic, buttcrude.
http://www.chathour.com/LilFatMan – This is your account. Anyone should create an account there and ask people what they think of this user. He is one of the most vicious abusive people on that site constantly telling people to commit suicide.
@Ronnyboy: I guarantee you I would say everything to your face because everything I said is pretty much truthful. I would have no reason to lie.
DDstar1me
@Giancarlo85 ….I just grabbed them. Both pairs are in working order. Wanna meet? You can grab them too if yah like. lol.
Giancarlo85
@Ronnyboy: Funny how you ultra-masculine chest beaters are the biggest cowards out there.
I doubt you’ll show up, and I’ll simply waste gas driving there and my time.
@DDstar1me: Dude… I’m talking about your nuts. Not the one you found in the kitchen in a container.
Doug
Racism on these meetup sites doesn’t even begin to match the physical requirements gay men insist from each other. As a guy with an average-sized dick, I’m noticing there are a lot of stretched-out size queens on these apps whose main requirement is 8-9 inches or above!
Masc Pride
@moldisdelicious: Nice try. That link mostly pertains to police brutality and rioting, something very different from what’s being discussed here. Go back to your little link arsenal and find something germane to topic. I quoted what stated as you stated it. Grindr is an app where gay men look for sex. You’re playing word games. I’m not bent out of shape. I’m simply answering you. YOU started this conversation. You’re also guilty of the same character flaws you’ve thrown at me. You’re just a ball of misdirected emotions. lol
@DDstar1me: Totally bet he’s a part of that 80 percent looking for a “white frat bro”. A lot of these types love complaining about preferences…but they want young, tight and white too…but of course that’s “okay”.
@Ronnyboy: Also bet he’s about 5’6, 130 lbs and scared of his own shadow.
Giancarlo85
@Masc Pride: More like 6’2″. And you’re probably the shortest guy on this site with huge nerd like glasses.
You are in deep denial about life, musk pride. You don’t even know what you’re talking about at this point.
NateOcean
(1) To each their own.
But there’s no reason to be offensive in expressing a preference, be it age, body type, or race.
(2) I also think the web sites do a disservice when they lump an entire range of people into the “mixed” category. Why not allow folks to check multiple boxes if they wish, and report them all?
(3) I’ve encountered a few friends but with something hard to put a name on here:
Native American dudes claiming to be “Asian” since they perceive that as more acceptable.
A Persian guy claiming to be “Mexican” since he feared an Iranian backlash.
India Indians checking the “Asian” box (since geographically that is correct) when “South Asian” is a better description.
These examples, and others, seem to describe people uncomfortable in their own skins.
moldisdelicious
@Doug:
That’s why sites like those are jokes. There’s a lot of dreamers. It’s not about being realistic. The only thing about grindr, scruff, and these other gay apps which are good are is for networking. There’s a possibility that you might meet someone there that is worth it but that’s a dime a dozen.
guyingpp
@Xzamilio: Ok… how about if a 30 yr old says no one under 25? is that ageist? Or is it only ageist when the 25 yr old says no one over 30?
This particular post is all over the gay blogosphere today and I really just don’t get the outrage. these guys are, ok sometimes rather insensitively, stating a preference on who they want to fuck not making some grand pronouncement of racial superiority.
Ronnyboy
@Giancarlo85: Oh yeah, I guarantee it. LMAO. Here’s an email if you’re ever interested.. [email protected]
DDstar1me
@Giancarlo85 …..As I said. let me know if you wanna meet for a feel. Also, your very angry comments leads me to believe that you have not nutted in along time. I can take care of that for you as well…..lol.wink!
Giancarlo85
I think i’m going to throw up.
….
Yuck. You two are gross.
Ronnyboy and DDStar should hook up. They obviously want the same thing.
moldisdelicious
@Masc Pride:
You are once again showing your lack of intelligence. You didn’t read the article so why even speak about it. I guess the fear of being wrong combined with your insecurities is making you is making you realize you are not as smart as you think you are. Now you’re relying on arrogance.
You basically felt like I was talking about you through that quote because you know that you are that person im talking about. I don’t know you though. That’s your own admission about yourself. My statement was quite vague and never singled any specific group out. Gay, straight, men, women. Desperate people come in all shapes, forms and sizes. People who are desperate usually put themselves in unnecessary situations they don’t even have to be in in order to get something.
DDstar1me
@Giancarlo85 …oh come on baby. It’s just you and me. No one else has to know what we do in the dark. wink! That other guy will have to wait his turn.
[email protected]…let me know.
Giancarlo85
I’ll pass.
Masc Pride
@moldisdelicious: Blah, blah, blah. You’re full of double talk and double standards.
moldisdelicious
@Masc Pride: sounds like you’re desperate. When all else fails, resort to ad-homiens.
Giancarlo85
@moldisdelicious: He ran out of arguments. This happens often. He disppears shortly later.
Masc Pride
@moldisdelicious: Wow. As much as you’ve been using it, I would think you’d at least know how to spell AD HOMINEM, especially since you’re so intellectually superior and all. And please, do not even think of blaming auto correct. lmao
Giancarlo85
@Masc Pride: Coming from the guy who makes grammar and spelling errors all the time, that’s a bit ironic!
Cam
@BJ McFrisky: said…. “Stating that you have “just a preference” is rac1st?
Holy shit, we really have stumbled down the rabbit hole, haven’t we?”
________________________________
What a shock, the guy who always defends anti-gay bigots also defends rac-ists.
BJ, funny how you left out the words that were in the profile RIGHT BEFORE the phrase “Just a preference”.
The guy said, “I’m white and attractive, if you are anything LESS, then you aren’t worth it, just a preference”.
Weird how you left that part out isn’t it?
Xzamilio
@guyingpp: Stay on subject and stop attempting to drive the conversation away from the topic at hand. I personally don’t give two craps about what people “prefer”, but I do get the gripe… especially having dealt with it myself in the past. But I’ll bite… YES, it is ageist to dismiss someone solely because of their age, save minors and elderly individuals incapable of making sane thoughts.
It’s easy for individuals who haven’t experienced it to dismiss it as “no big deal.”
moldisdelicious
@Masc Pride:
Still sounding desperate. When you’re ready to argue against all the things I brought up challenging your ignorance, let me know.
guyingpp
@Xzamilio: How am I not staying on topic? These are HOOK UP APPS we’re talking about, not admissions to college or denial of employment. If someone has no sexual interest in people old enough to be their son or father, that isn’t ageist, it’s a preference. If you find people with over 35 BMIs attractive and want to fuck them instead of twinks, it’s not body shaming, its a preference. it is no different with race preference. there are physical characteristics of certain ethnicity I find attractive… and others I don’t. I get that some of these guys highlighted are being dicks about it, but if one is on a hook up app, why is it so offensive to simply say what you want and what you’re not interested in?
Masc Pride
@moldisdelicious: I knew you wouldn’t have much to say after that. So much for that intellectual superiority! You can go around in circles without me. 😉
Masc Pride
It’s also interesting how Davey & Friends didn’t show even one profile of a black or Asian guy stating “whites only”, which is also quite common online. Makes this whole thing seem a bit like the preference-policing is targeting a specific type, which is ironically also a little biased.
Xzamilio
@guyingpp: What features?
Xzamilio
@guyingpp: Or rather, what characteristics?
Blackceo
I laughed my ass off at the facial expressions of the Black guy with the F sweater cuz those were basically my reactions. Like….really bitch. I died when he threw the phone tho lol. Some of those were just so ignorant. You can state a preference without being derogatory about it. When I used to go on those online dating sites I filtered the profiles based on race. I usually clicked that I was interested in Black, Latino, Arab/Middle Eastern, or Mixed but didn’t put in my profile things like “no fats no fems” or “no Whites or Asians” because it was unnecessary.
Again, there’s a difference between preference and outright exclusion which happens when you rule out anyone who doesn’t fit the mold of your preference. I look at it as first choice and then next option. Whatever your preference is you want this above all other choices because it is what you are attracted to. The many reasons a person is attractive to you physically (height, weight, facial features, etc) can be found in any race. So to say “I don’t date ______ people” is exclusion. You have determined that the stereotypes, perceptions, and experiences you have of one particular group are not attractive to you and thus have made a generalization about an entire group of people, and therefore they are not date or fuck worthy. And yup…that is your choice to do that but just fucking own it instead of trying to make it about preference. That’s not preference; it’s exclusion.
oddchild1
The truth is saying “It’s not racism; it’s just a preference.” is no different than responding to “Black Lives Matter.” with “All Lives Matter.” it’s a polite way of saying “Shut up Ni**er” just like “Hate the sin not the sinner.” is a polite way of saying “God Hates F*gs.”
Arcamenel
@oddchild1: This!!
Arcamenel
Todrick’s response really hit the nail on the head about the root cause of these r@cist preferences. White standards of beauty and desirability are ingrained in us very early. I mean look at the good doll vs bad doll test that psychologist did to children. Tell me why a black child no older than six would say the black doll is bad or ugly simply because it’s black.
The same people who say race doesn’t matter and “we’re all one race, the human race” will be the same ones putting this kind of vitriol in their dating profiles. Apparently it does matter to you in some aspect.
Blackceo
@oddchild1:
“The truth is saying “It’s not racism; it’s just a preference.” is no different than responding to “Black Lives Matter.” with “All Lives Matter.” it’s a polite way of saying “Shut up Ni**er” just like “Hate the sin not the sinner.” is a polite way of saying “God Hates F*gs.”
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This tea right here is scalding!!! I love a good educational drag!! You are so right.
DDstar1me
@Blackceo and @oddchild1 @Arcamenel …really great points. However, you can’t preach to white people about black lives because they can’t and will never understand. We, all of us, have been brainwashed like Tod said. It’s so true. When you grow up seeing one color on tv and your told that is the standard. What are you to think as a child? As adults we are now trying to correct something that is so deep seeded in our minds and it’s difficult to help even our own people understand when we fight within our own culture about light skin and dark skin. It’s so sad.
But, really great points guys.
oddchild1
@DDstar1me: What we have to realize is that this fight isn’t about up and what we want; but what future we’re going to leave for those who follow in our footsteps; if we don’t fight these problems to win now, we leave that burden to others. I refuse to shirk that responsibility and to defer it to future generations.
Giancarlo85
Telling ourselves a problem doesn’t exist will cause to become a cancer in society. Turning a blind eye and pretending something doesn’t exist will make it more difficult to treat. Bobby Kennedy once laid out a vision for this nation and I can say unequivocally that we have failed. Not only have we failed, we actually have an entire political party supporting hatred and violence.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hhANTymDIYk
We utterly failed.
i-QualiteeBot 9000
i-QualiteeBot can not compute racism, and therefore it must be destroyed.
All humans are the same, all humans matter equaly under all circumstances, all must feel equal amount of physical attraction towards every other human being, and all must love each other equaly. If not they must be destroyed.
Any and all opinions that deviate from total equality for all human beings must be terminated immediately.
oddchild1
@i-QualiteeBot 9000: Yes; because the concerns and opinions of people of color should be mocked until “All those stupid Ni**gers shut up and know their place.” it would have been more honest had you said that.
SportGuy
Pretty smart guys that were in this clip. Apps like grindr, etc are a joke. They are nothing but sad pathetic guys with race issues.
Giancarlo85
@oddchild1: We still have people echoing the views of George Wallace to this day.
We’ve failed as a nation to reach any sort of promise. If only Robert F Kennedy was President instead of Nixon… maybe things would be different. Maybe the Reagan years would have never happened, nor would the two Bushs who followed.
alphacentauri
@DDstar1me: I guess you’ve never been to Carribean countries or many African countries, those cultures like black people.
oddchild1
@Giancarlo85: If you think this is about failure to you then step aside and be silent. The truth is fight continues, you can lay down and die if you wish to be pathetic about it; but I choose to fight. The only way to gain ground and to create change is through continuing the fight.
oddchild1
@alphacentauri: This isn’t about those countries this is about our country, this is about our community and what direction we want them to go into for the future.
Cagnazzo82
@Masc Pride: In the video they actually did show one asian who said no asians.
Which is ultimately pretty sad. I wonder if someone like that actually thinks the straight-acting ‘dudebros’ on grindr find them more attractive for hating on themselves in their profile.
Crazy stuff.
Giancarlo85
@oddchild1: You’ve completely misread what I posted. We have failed. We need to acknowledge that or we won’t ever improve. I’ve already said under another article people must get out to vote to prevent the anti-freedom party from seizing power.
Slow down and read a bit more carefully please.
oddchild1
@Giancarlo85: I read it perfectly fine; you were prattling on about a by gone time as if the modern day is the wort piece of crap to have ever existed. Where you talk like the modern era is a failure; I talk about it as a work in progress. The way Republican’s continue to old power is thanks to antiquated attitudes; “It’s not racism; it’s a preference.” is one in the gay community that does nothing but give our opposition more power over the minds and hearts in this country. If we want to defeat the party of hate we have to root out the hate in our own community.
Giancarlo85
@oddchild1: Your attitude is deplorable. It is a failure. It isn’t a work in progress. We need to start over again and rebuild from scratch. There is no foundation to build on here. The quicker we acknowledge this reality the better off we will be in the end.
And I never said anything about a bygone time being better than what is going on now. I’m simply saying we haven’t met certain expectations. Tone it down please.
oddchild1
@Giancarlo85: Thank you for that “tone check” I’m sure you’re very proud about your tone policing. You saying everything is a failure, means we should give up and that there is no hope for change; I soundly reject that. By calling everything now a failure you shame the legacies Martin Luther King and of Bobby Kennedy because if today is a failure then all the sacrifices they made were for nothing and their deaths were pointless; basically you’re saying their work was worthless because we don’t have 100% perfection by your standards. I soundly reject that. Yes we are a work in progress, yes we there is a lot of work to be done, yes the fight continues. You are the failure for succumbing to your nihilistic cynicism and believing that there is nothing in this world worth saving or salvaging.
n900mixalot
Wow, that turned ugly pretty quickly, but the strong arguments stuck around. I think when we deal with people and have communities based on what it is we are physically attracted to, as opposed to some other common thread, we tend to get into trouble. It’s going to take a bit more evolution for the initial issues to pan out, and I see progress here and there, and to read comments like these shows progress … as well as others who are stuck in their own ways. Good commentary folks! This is one of the better threads I’ve seen on here.
sportsguy1983
Looks like they are rehashing this old and tired topic.
vonlmo
No Fats, No Fems. No one has problems w that.
asby
Yet Davey Wavey’s youtube videos always include different types of men…..
calabrazy55
If a guy doesn’t want to fuck you, that’s it. End of story.
Magnus
The subject matter of this video aside, is anyone else besides me getting sick and tired of Davey Wavey?
i-QualiteeBot 9000
@calabrazy55: Wrong: everyone must be equally attracted to achieve total equality. Equality is correct, everything else must be destroyed.
oddchild1
@calabrazy55: guys can clearly state what they prefer instead of posting which men they don’t want to fuck with the blatant terminology of the Jim Crow era.
oddchild1
@i-QualiteeBot 9000: Yes; because the concerns and opinions of people of color should be mocked until “All those stupid Ni**gers shut up and know their place.” it would have been more honest had you said that.
Captain Obvious
What’s with all these desperate guys who just have to try and force everyone to be into them?
If a guy doesn’t want you then whining about his profile isn’t going to change that. Who cares?
Stop online “dating” if you’re that sensitive to it. Most of this crap is just for hookups anyway. No one can state a “preference” irl.
All these videos and blogs whining about this stuff just makes people think we care deeply if they pre-reject us when most really don’t. Would anyone do this much crying if they got rejected irl?
Franklin
As much as people want to deny it, nobody’s preferences are formed in a vacuum. The romantic ideal in a culture changes over time depending on how the culture at large changes. For example, if Grindr existed in the early 20th century, you would see profiles with WASP men saying things like no Italians or Irish, just a preference, or not spaghetti or potatoes, and they would be using the same justifications people are using today for these aversion to other groups. Now a days, you would never see a profile that said no Italians or Irish, and I’m willing to be most people would think it was weird for you to put something like that in our profile. Why is that? It’s because the culture changed, and as they negative stereotypes of those two groups started to fall away, people began to realize that that they weren’t really all the different from each other.
Captain Obvious
@Franklin: Or people form their own likes and dislikes based on their own experiences.
Most people date those who they’re accustomed to. Very few branch outside their comfort zone to try something(or someone) new.
It’s no different than food choices. Most people eat the same food they grew up eating and very few expand to different foods later in life. That’s why mothers get blamed for obesity because what you feed your kids sets the tone of the foods they’ll eat for the rest of their lives.
If you grow up in a neighborhood that’s primarily of a certain group you’re probably not going to venture outside of that group because you’re not used to other people.
If you got bullied by a certain group as a kid you’re probably not going to date people of that group as an adult.
if you constantly see/hear news reports of a certain group committing crimes you’ll probably be fearful of that group as a whole(though anyone with half a brain knows the news media is very manipulative this way)
It goes on and on but it’s not really culture that sets preference. It’s your environment, your experiences, what you’re taught by your parents, and who you meet during your formative years.
It’s very weird to see people get attacked for who they personally choose/want to date. There’s no “We are the world.” inside your house. You and you alone have to be physically, mentally, and spiritually attracted to the man you’re interested in. No one else gets a say, it’s not a political statement, and it’s not r@cist to not be attracted to the way someone else looks.
moldisdelicious
The level of ignorance that some of you guys have in here is sad. Like to me, if you’re ignorant, just admit it. The thing that I don’t get is why some of you dudes try to act like your shit don’t stink or like you’re right when you know you’re not. Quit trying to make everyone out that doesn’t approve of your backwards mentality to be the problems when it’s you. These dudes want people to applaud for being terrible when regardless, no decent person will sign off with what you’re doing.
moldisdelicious
@Captain Obvious:
Please stop. It’s not about dating or getting someone who isn’t interested in you to like you. It’s about respect. Some of you don’t know what respect is because you don’t respect yourselves to begin with like you, Mr captain oblivious. You can reject someone with dehumanizing them. The irony is that most of these guys being ballsy with their ignorance and arrogance are the same ones to protest when someone give them what they give to others. They’re ready to say how the gay community needs to stuck together and how we need to be tolerant towards each other all because they’re getting insulted. Yet it’s okay when they themselves subject others to that form of abuse. Pathetic.
moldisdelicious
@moldisdelicious:
You can reject somebody without dehumanizing them. My apologies.
stranded
Damn. I should have read the description before viewing, I don’t like Davey Wavey and i try not to support his career by watching his videos. I didn’t think it was that good of a video in terms of reactions by the guys. The only thing i’m really questioning is the decision to blur out the guys names. Isn’t grindr a public forum? These guys obviously don’t mind letting people know their “preferences” so what’s the big deal in revealing their faces? Unless it’s staged.
As far as the conversation about racial preferences. The only thing i would say is that facial features, skin tones and body shapes can differ dramatically within the same race, so it doesn’t make any sense for someone to generalize and say “no…”
Giancarlo85
@oddchild1: You suffer from reading comprehension issues. I never said all is lost. I simply think we need to start from scratch and work from that.
And how dare you say I shame MLK or Bobby Kennedy? Their visions have not been met. In fact far from it. Learn how to READ. Stop acting like a self centered CHILD.
“basically you’re saying their work was worthless because we don’t have 100% perfection by your standards.”
NONENSE! I NEVER SAID THAT. This is just another case of you PUTTING WORDS in my mouth.
You just can’t handle the fact that I disagree with your pie in the sky overly optimistic nonsense.
“You are the failure for succumbing to your nihilistic cynicism and believing that there is nothing in this world worth saving or salvaging.”
And you’re just a babbling tool who thinks too highly of himself and the world around him without recognizing the reality. Did I ever say we need to just throw in the towel? No. I have said TIME AND TIME AGAIN that WE NEED TO WORK HARDER and SMARTER UNDER VARIOUS ARTICLES.
So take your babbling nonsense somewhere else! I Will not hear it nor will have I have anything to do with a self centered egoist who thinks he can talk for others.
Giancarlo85
@oddchild1: And please don’t you ever speak for me again or put words in my mouth. You won’t get a nice reception around here when you come off as a pompous know-it-all ass.
BlogShag
@Captain Obvious: That is so unlike me, I don’t even understand your philosophy. I abhor much of the food I ate when I was young. It was traditional 1960s, 1970s Donna Reed family fare at my dad’s house (too much steak,only iceberg lettuce, etc.) and my bio mom was a terrible cook, so us kids did the cooking or scratched and foraged with packaged foods at her house…awful cook
Starting at 15 I started reading labels, learning about organics, etc. I could not believe what they put in our food supply. It is nothing short of eugenics and genocide.
I have dated every color under the rainbow. I was raised being exposed to many things. Most people aren’t like that. Some of the meanest people I’ve experienced are of my own ethnicity (nubian)
I don’t think it matters how a person grows up, because otherwise my diet would be the same as when I grew up. What does matter is how fearless and curious a person is, otherwise they will just stick to their own world because there is no possible threat or challenge which many don’t like dealing with.
ButtStuff
@Giancarlo85: Those are all direct quotes from you. I didn’t make any of that up. Those all came from you, straight copy and paste. How are you not ashamed of yourself?
Giancarlo85
Buttcrude needs to make sure he wipes his rear a bit better. Skid marks aren’t pleasant.
oddchild1
@Giancarlo85: I never put words in your mouth I just cut through your bullshit. Your bullshit that millenials are a lost generation, your bullshit that the America is in the toilet, your bullshit that you somehow embody the spirit of Bobby Kennedy or MLK yes you shame their legacies because where they stood, fought and believed that we would make it to the promised land; you say that the promised land is a lie and that we need to try something else.
oddchild1
@Giancarlo85: The problem is you don’t like being confronted on your bullshit.
dustashed
Reese bait!
must admit the “I’ve blocked more asians than the great wall of china” profile had me loling though.. and i’m asian
People are people, that’s just it. Human nature
moldisdelicious
You know something though. This is how you know folks are bullshitting with the preferences talk.
If a straight person had a preference to not have any gay friends or to not deal with gay people where they’ll only deal exclusively with other straight people, they would be called homophobic. So why can’t we call a spade a spade if folks decide to do the same thing involving ethinicity or skin color?
junk4sts
These profiles are very specific examples, but the “extreme preferences” run deeper than this. I actually paid for a grindr subscription for about 3 months, I posted a picture and built a profile, I stayed away from people who’s preferences excluded me, either because of age, race, perceived size, or whatever else people use to exclude others. I kept the app up most of the time so that I was always available and I answered everyone who tried wanted to talk to me. An only tried to talk to people who’s profiles seemed agreeable, I was surprised by how few people would actually talk to me.
I guess my problem with grindr and hook-up sites is that people limit themselves so much, I like men, skin color, eye color, build, amount of hair, cut or uncut, that stuff just doesn’t matter as much as the heart and mind of the guy, and good hearts and minds come in all kinds of wrappers.
I understand that the only thing you have to go on when using grindr is a picture and a profile, so there needs to be some physical attraction, and in the case of grindr, it’s not a dating app, it’s a hookup app – so physical attraction is very important, all you should be looking for on grindr is an attractive owner of a willing hole or a sturdy pole.
But is that person really that attractive when you find out he’s a narcissistic a-hole, or a mean spirited jerk, a bitchy queen, a republican, or a bigot? Even in a hook-up situation, the heart and mind matter. There are plenty of attractive men of all shapes and sizes, don’t limit yourself to just one ‘flavor’.
Maybe it’s just me, but I’ve often found that a guy who is physically a 10 can easily lose 6 points when I find out he’s ugly on the inside. And the opposite is also true, I have met and gotten to know guys who were 3 or 4 but who turned out to be sexy as hell once I got a glimpse of their beautiful soul.
The one that really gets you going might not look like you think they should on the outside and that’s why even in hook-up situations we shouldn’t be so limiting, your soulmate just might be an Asian muscle bear, or soft spoken black guy who has a heart of gold.
ctrombley
This article is unbalanced. They should have shown a minorities profile that says “no whites” . There’s plenty out there.