I'm sure a lot of regular Queerty readers don't have a lot of sympathy for Gay guys who join the military, knowing there is DADT. But listening to this guy's story, it definitely gives the impression he minded his own business and it was presumed because he wasn't pussy crazy nor would go to a prostitute, he MUST be Gay. He certainly sounds straight enough. I can sympathize, because when I was about 22 I had a job where it seemed everyone had children by that age, married or not. Since I didn't and even though I acted very straight, the rumors started anyway.

For those who didn't listen, the "pranks" this guy endured were pretty harsh and I don't know the military can justify or bend the rules to drop the charges when there were so many.

Granted many of our service men and women are under 25 when the sex drive is highest but listening to him talk about how many guys were having sex with women, desiring women, going to prostitutes – I wonder where "honor courage and commitment" come in (the reason he was ousted since he didn't meet those standards) and WHERE our wonderful Christian Right is denouncing all this (STRAIGHT) but still IMMORAL behavior (according to their Bible.)

I hope the rest of his life is a lot better than his military experience.

@Jaroslaw:

Your empathy for Rocha is admirable, but while I'm sure you understand, I wanted to make some things clear for others.

1. Entering the military despite "knowing about DADT" is "officially" irrelevant. The policy is not that gays can't serve, but that they can only do it closeted. It's a ludicrous, screamingly dishonest policy, putting ALL the burden on the servicemember, BUT if he or she does not come out, they are SUPPOSED to be left alone. Too often, however, that is not the case. But one shouldn't blame the gay person who enters in good faith assuming he or she will be, in turn, treated fairly.

Given the estimate of 65,000 gays serving at any one-time versus the current rate of discharges of about 700 a year [many of whom purposely self-identify], and an estimated 4000 others who simply choose not to reenlist, obviously most are succeeding in keeping their orientation secret.[They shouldn't have to, but....]

2. Of course, most enter the military in their late teens or early twenties, and many either have not realized they're gay [yes, it still happens] or, as some throughout history, believe the thoughts, even experiences, they've had are not their "real" or "permanent" identity. Thus, when their self-awareness does crystallize post enlistment they are less prepared for the game of lying and hiding than those who had accepted that they were gay before enlisting.

But, again, given the numbers that continue to serve successfully, it works out for most, despite being a constant pressure upon them that they should not have to endure. Given the performance of many despite it, one would think the military would conclude that they would have even greater performers if that pressure were removed. Denial of that is nothing new. Research going back all the way to WWII showed that the average gay person identifed and discharged scored higher on various indices of value than the average nongay servicemember.

3. Nevertheless, DADT, which is merely another vintage of the old wine of banning known gays in new bottles, does contribute to the experiences of servicemembers like Rocha just as the policy it replaced did. For it sends the message to an already hyper-masculine culture [wherein the first definition of "masculine" is "NOT GAY"] that there is something to be actively hated about gays.

The military, just as it once was for racism, is the last secular [i.e., non religious] bastion of institutionalized homophobia in the United States.

Most are unaware that the full colloquial name of the law is now "Don't Ask, Don't Tell, Don't Pursue, Don't HARASS," but, for the most part, uniformed and civilan management of the military have ignored the mandate to create and enforce an atmosphere of nonharassment…primarily because too many feel the need to, in fact, perpetuate such hostility.

It is, I'm convinced, the reason that opposition to gay integration still exists where it does: the need to feel superior, just as many of the same opposed women in the services. They don't need "studies" to prove to them that gays don't harm "unit cohesion" blah blah blah; they know it from experience.

But, to such Troglodytes…the ones Obama is currently intimidated by…to allow out gays to serve would prove that their heterosexuality has nothing to do with "being a [military] 'man'."

[img]http://21.media.tumblr.com/b9vfl4b63mg6adp1BvVKcwjTo1_500.jpg[/img]

Im just curious–if Dont Ask Dont Tell is repealed, do we really think homophobic attacks on gay soldiers will stop? Their platoon mates will still cover for each other and the military will try just as hard to sweep things under the carpet.

@merkin:

Yes, but then gay soldiers could actually step up and try to do something about it without having to worry about getting thrown out on their ass.

The issues surrounding Gay nonacceptance, intolerance and blatant segregation will be the eventual downfall of the nation. Karma is powerful and always provides just closure where needed.

The injustices endured by all Gay men and women are heard, seen and witnessed. The recourse may not be immediate but it is approaching. Hate is not truth, love is truth. Those who suffer because of who they love will inherit the kingdom of heaven.

Love will prevail. This is truth.

@D-Sun:

You're point is excellent. Being afraid to speak up for others for fear of being out oneself has long been a problem [just as it is in homophobic circles in the civilian world, e.g., public schools, sports, business....].

Racial integration only finally "took" when commanders were made to understand that their own performance ratings depended upon them enforcing a nonhostile environment and equal opportunity in job assignments, etc.

And so it will be with out-gay integration [though the majority of gays will stay closeted until they see real change in attitudes].

@merkin: You are right that it will take more than moreley a policy change, ie a culture change as well, but without the legitimacy the DADT gives homophobes the attacks will be more difficult.

#2 Michael – Yes, I do understand – I was trying to pre-empt comments of "he should have known, he joined the military etc."

Of course, I also agree with almost everything you write on this post and especially your post on here.