So, Wait, Does Madonna Have A New Baby Or Not?
 

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Another day, another Madonna adopts a Malawian baby rumor. First a government official says that Madge came to the small African country to find a baby boy, then her publicist says that ain’t nothing but bullshit, and now we’ve got yet another report that she’ll be bringing more than just a few knick-knacks back from her trip.

Malawian government officials said last week the pop star planned to adopt a Malawian boy while she is in the impoverished African nation visiting projects she funds for AIDS orphans. However, they declined to comment on Yohame Banda’s claim that his son David had been adopted by the singer.

You gotta hand it to Madonna. Even after all these years, she still manages to keep us guessing.

We’re inclined to believe it, not because we trust this Banda character, but because Liz Rosenberg, the material mama’s publicist, has yet to issue a denial. That’s like Hollywood’s version of a confirmation. Only not. Tricky, right?

Still, things about this “story” remain a bit dodgy: some say the potential baby goes by the name David, while others insist he’s called Luca, while yet others doubt he even exists.

Through all of this baby drama, we keep asking ourselves why we care. Then we remember: we’re gay. Madonna’s so ingrained in our DNA that she could take a shit and we’d call it news.

Breaking: Madonna Just Farted!

Previously: Madonna Has No African Baby

 
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