You guys remember our two-part posting on homo-hater Madeline Crabb‘s Foley-related essays, right? No? Well, click here for part one and here for part two.
Anyway, despite our better judgement (and blood pressure), we’ve been hooked on her crackpot contemplations. Not surprisingly, Mad Crabb (as a clever reader deems her in part two’s comments) has released a last-minute election essay in which she explores some of the key issues facing the nation. While she touches on the war and national security, we’re justifiably intrigued by her ruminations on gay-marriage. Here’s what Ol’ Crabbie’s got to say:
…[F]or those who still can’t understand why same-sex marriage is detrimental to society, then consider some of the homosexual’s unhealthy sexual practices: anal sex, “rimming,” and “fisting.” I will not describe these things here…
Based just on the public health hazard, it is bad public policy to promote and encourage homosexuality. Yes, this is America and people can do whatever they want. But when we consider “mainstreaming” these kinds of dangerous, vile practices, we jeopardize all Americans. Hello! What are we thinking?
Homosexual behavior also causes all Americans to absorb substantially higher health costs for the many diseases homosexuals acquire. Americans pay for homosexual “at risk” behavior through higher insurance premiums; but they also pay higher taxes to cover the uninsured, and for governmental programs like AIDS prevention, etc. – programs that never tell people to stop doing things, like sodomy, that cause such diseases. Duh!
Actually, Crabb’s right. In his famed predictions, Nostradamus predicted that “the great nation shall be brought down by a thrusting fist”. Eerie.
(PS: Madeline Crabb’s changed her photo. Gone are the days of shoulder-padded yellow blazers. This season’s all about orange shoulder-padded blouses. Take note.)
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
sonny
I’m not sure if anyone noticed this besides me, but her email address is no longer included at the bottom of her posts. I know it was originally on the first posting I read from her. I emailed her and told her what I thought of her “ideas” but now that it’s no longer included, I can’t continue telling her what a great job (ugh) she’s doing.
MBSF
oh, like the str8s don’t have anal sex, or even fisting. Puh-leez. We are no more or less gross as you honey, okay. We just don’t beat ourselves up about it because there’s no point.
Cody
“then consider some of the homosexual’s unhealthy sexual practices: anal sex, “rimming,” and “fisting.” I will not describe these things here…”
Not to be the bearer of bad news….but don’t heterosexuals partake in the same actions?
On the subject of rimming, I know I heard a joke from Monique on the DVD of “Qeens of Comedy” about giving your man a rim job.
When I first learned about fisting, it was the fist in the vagina, not the anus. I learned later about the fist in the anus, at which point I cried.
And these days, who doesn’t have anal sex? All of my woman friends complain to me all the time about how their men want to stick it in their ass. My view point on that: Guys, they have a vagina! Use the vagina! You want ass, come to me…
I think this is just a perfect example of the whole belief system the anti-gay movement uses. That system being “point out all the horrible things the others do, but ignore the fact that we do the same, if not worse”. It reminds me of elementary school.
Cody
“Queens of Comedy”
I left out the “u”
Mike
I know it’s ridiculous to try and argue with this woman, but on the subject of irresponsible behavior that causes health insurance premiums to go up–how about the epidemic of obesity in our country which has put type 2 diabetes at an all time high and what about the millions of americans who still smoke? The number of Americans driving up insurance premiums who afflicted with the host of diseases from heart disease to diabetes associated with the irrepsonsible behavior of smoking and over-eating far outweigh those of people with AIDS.
Sorry, I just had to get that off my chest. I’m sure ol’ Mad Crabb will never even read this tho.
Brandon
Bitch is crazee!
jackmax2
Hey Sonny–can you post her email address please? Some of us might like to introduce ourselves to lil Miss Crabb. THANKS!
Cullan
Perhaps this is bad kharma but I see a flight of stairs and a nasty fall in this woman’s future. But fuck me, she’ll probably be martyred somehow anyway and she’ll come back all translucent and glowing, talking about how the “force” is still with you Pat Robertson or some such nonsense.
FizziekruntNT
Oh Heavens! I couldn’t agree with Miss Crabbycunt more! Rimming indeed! I personally extend her the courteous invitation to take a deep long sip of my shit through a Krazy Straw ™. Can’t have her going off and smearing her lipstick.
Ben Harris
In the universe that she lives in gay people don’t:
1. Pay tax
2. Have health insurance
3. Stop having animal sex
Oh how I wish I didn’t pay tax…
Finalin
This bitch is nuts!!!! And another thing. The group with the LOWEST number of sexually transmited diseases is Lesbians. Yes, that is right. Even lower then those straight people she is so proud of, especially the closeted evangelicals. Cause they are into some FUCKED up shit. Just ask Teddy.
jonnee
Dear Ms. Madeline Crabb,
You obviously have no qualms with quoting fraudulent facts. Let me do a bit of clearing up for your readers (not that it seems as if any of them actually BELIEVE you, which is saying something, isn’t it?)
1.) As a 26-year old gay man with many gay friends, I don’t know anyone who participates in fisting. This leads me to believe that while it does happen (I’ve unfortunately meandered upon the videos that prove it), it is (as in the straight sex arena) a fetish enjoyed by a small population.
2.) Analingus or rimming is not merely enjoyed by gay men. Lesbians, straight men, straight women, and any variation in between can enjoy rimming. This is because we all have roughly the same nerve ending design in our anus, which is highly susceptible to stimulus. I know girls who do it to their boyfriends and their boyfriends love it; welcome to an age where our sexual taboos fall by the wayside.
3.) Gay men as the problem in regard to AIDS? One of the highest growing groups of AIDS/HIV victims (and I mean VICTIMS) is women of color ages 18-25. This group contracts it because it is less likely to use protection. If you TRULY wanted to eliminate AIDS/HIV, you would recognize that trying to force your views on other people will not be effective. You must provide people the opportunity to sleep with whomever they want and be safe about it. That’s what a truly Democratic society would do.
4.) Lastly, I DARE any insurance company to say that gay people are causing insurance rates to rise! That would be the utmost in hypocrisy in an industry rampant with fraud and deception that are much more likely to be the cause of an insurance cost that rises at a rate that makes inflation look nonexistent.
All in all, I’m sure that this post is preaching to the choir, but get REAL, woman!!!