Comments on: Sorry, Barbie: 5 Action Figures For Gay Boys

By: ????

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By: Brendan D.

Brendan D. — Fri, 06 Feb 2009 17:56:34 +0000

My Stretch Armstrong lost its clothes right out of the package and never found them again. Funny, considering I don’t go for the body-builder type. Though come to think of it, I did get a kick out of tying him in knots around himself… I guess it was more about the fact that he was his own bondage gear!

Of course, there was also the off-shoot Vac-Man, teaching young kids all across America about the dangers of penis-pump abuse. We never did get all the PVC pellets out of the rug…

By: Dan

Dan — Thu, 05 Feb 2009 08:13:26 +0000

Wolverine and Cyclops. I was overjoyed when Hugh Jackman was named “Sexiest Man of the Year” in 2008, because he validated all my naughty fantasies about large hairy men from my childhood.

By: Woof

Woof — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 19:08:44 +0000

Oh come on Silver Hawks were just a rip off of the old G Force cartoon!

By: Scott

Scott — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 13:02:08 +0000

@Carsen Tyler: Star Trek was WHERE IT WAS AT! Oh god, I had so many Trek figures, it’s not even funny. My mom would make me costumes and we’d go to the conventions. I remember one time she made me a Bajoran earring. Bajoran earrings, for those who do not know, are always worn on the right ear. I wore it around the neighborhood and got teased by my friends who said that only gay guys wear earrings in their right ear. So I’m going to say that turned me gay.

By: Gonzo

Gonzo — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 10:23:02 +0000

@Aaron:

Tomax and Xamot, totally turned me gay too.

By: Jude

Jude — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 03:48:57 +0000

I loved BraveStarr. Man that horse had a big gun. And the native american cowboy, with the strength of a bear… nice.

By: Shark

Shark — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 02:32:03 +0000

Street Fighter turned me gay.

By: GayBobVT

GayBobVT — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 01:35:03 +0000

Sorry Carsen… Johnny WEST[img]http://www.stewartsattic.com/Marx/figures/images/145box_s.jpg[/img]

By: Carsen T.

Carsen T. — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 00:16:15 +0000

@GayBobVT: Hadji was Johnny Quest’s friend.

By: Aaron

Aaron — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 23:41:11 +0000

@myrios123:

Yes! I only collected the bad guy GI Joes, because they had way better outfits! Dr. Mindbender had a black velvet cape, couldn’t be bothered to wear a shirt and had purple pants. The Baroness was head to toe black leather, Destro had a silver head, Serpentor had that awesome snake costume…and then my favorite those sexy British twins. Can’t recall their names at the moment though…

And what gay kid in the ’80′s didn’t love He-Man?

Speaking of Silver Hawks…I some how managed to pop my water bed with one of those guys. He got lodged under the mattress and one of his arms punctured it. My parents were pissed. Oh, the 80′s…

By: Codswallop

Codswallop — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 22:51:25 +0000

How could you forget Big Jim, Mattel’s answer to GI Joe? Before your time? No excuse!

First of all, Big Jim’s bicep would flex when you bent his arm, plus he even came with a STUDDED METALLIC BAND you could put around his arm and that would pop off when he flexed his muscle! Such a little gym-bunny show-off, that one!

And you know how GI Joe and Ken all had flat, smooth groins? Not Big Jim! His groin was like an orange plastic pair of jockey shorts with a bit of bulge, hinting that if you could just figure out how to get them off he might still be “anatomically correct” under there.

[img]http://www.toysyouhad.com/BigJimO2.jpg[/img]

My Big Jim doll was somewhat of a slut. The poor thing was FOREVER getting “interrogated” in the nude by the GI Joes in the Command Headquarters and he LIKED IT! The smell of road-house whiskey on their breath, all that dirty touching… Oh. Sorry. That was Margaret White in “Carrie,” not Big Jim. Same difference.

By: GayBobVT

GayBobVT — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 21:53:14 +0000

Growing up I didn’t care for G.I. Joe – but I did have a Johnny West doll. Lots of camping out under the star fantasies… hmm, what was his Indian friend’s name?

By: Carsen Tyler

Carsen Tyler — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 21:14:32 +0000

What no Doctor Who, X-men, or Star Trek toys? Grew up on PBS and Sci-fi and my dad was a geek before he had a midlife crisis and became an ubercatholic. He bought me action figures when my mom was worried by the fact that I would rather dismatle the barbies and eat the care bears that play with them. I used to make Cyclops and Gambit make ou and it would be a secret from jean Grey. My dad never opened the Doctor Who toys, so I would put the boxes of the The Doctor and The Master together and pretend that they were trying to figure a way out so that they can run away together and happily travel though out time and space and have little time tots. I used to make Captain Kirk and Spock make out too. Let’s just say my grandparents thought it was funny, and my parents thought it was disturbing behaviour so then they took away my action figures, and that was when I was four. I am twenty now, and I have been buying a ton of action figures to make up for lost time. Funny because I get nostalgic for the toys that were taken away with my cousin and he found that if he removes the foam padding from his Wolverine costume from when he was ten he can still fit in it, so for last years comic-con he was yellowspandez! Wolverine. And it was hilarious.

By: myrios123

myrios123 — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 20:33:58 +0000

He-man, Silverhawks, and Thundercats for sure. I loved GI Joe action figures, but always rooted for Cobra, the bad guys had better uniforms.

By: Mike.C

Mike.C — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 20:09:20 +0000

Steve Austin 6 Million Dollar Man action figure with Karate chop hand and Bionic eye that you could look through. Definitely.

By: Chapmabe

Chapmabe — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 19:49:02 +0000

Silverhawks. And yes, they totally turned me gay.

By: Pretzels for Pyros

Pretzels for Pyros — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 19:46:01 +0000

I loved me some She-Ra action figures. Coupled with my too-fab Freestyle-loving ’80s babysitter, I was a sure-fire homo from the word go.

By: DaveO

DaveO — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 17:53:26 +0000

Latin America’s future homos are playing with Max Steel.

By: dgz

dgz — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 17:31:04 +0000

i, too, was a thundercats ho. ;)

By: Troy

Troy — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 16:40:54 +0000

Growing up I convinced my younger sister to let me use her Easy Bake Oven as a tanning bed for my Luke Skywalker action figure. The results were not tantastic! My pretty boy from a galaxy far, far away ended up looking like Hutt poo! Boo hoo!

By: TJ

TJ — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 15:33:22 +0000

This post made me think of my guilty pleasure: the catalog page at classcomics.com. Gay super heroes with huge packages. OH MY! Warning: NSFW

By: Darth Paul

Darth Paul — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 15:18:32 +0000

I was ALL about the He-Man when I was a kid. I made Mossman and Man-at-Arms 69…should’ve been a major clue to my preferences.

By: koalaboy

koalaboy — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 15:14:01 +0000

Duke and Wetsuit from G.I. Joe used to always look for Atlantis in my bathtub.. and sometimes they would find it! WWF was always hot. I would have costumes made for my Macho Man Randy Savage. Thundercats and He-man were also faves of mine. I was in love with Prince Adam’s(?) action figure from She-ra! Hells yeah!

By: flightoftheseabird

flightoftheseabird — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 15:07:53 +0000

I loved Thundercats. I always wondered how I turned out gay. Now I know. :) I saved all my UPC codes so I could send them away for my free Mum-Ra figure. Not the hunky demon one, but the pre-transformation one with red cloak. Good times, good times.

By: Nick

Nick — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 15:04:32 +0000

How DARE you dis Voltron as the poor man’s Transformers? Japhy, if I can find any Voltron stickers on Facebook, you’re SO getting them!

By: Allen

Allen — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 14:48:17 +0000

LOL! I had all of these toys growing up! This is AWESOME!

By: Coffee&Chicory

Coffee&Chicory — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 14:32:59 +0000

spelling error that no Star Wars fan should make – *Bobbba* It’s Boba Fett. I’ll let this one slide.

By: HerrDoktor

HerrDoktor — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 13:44:41 +0000

Distinguo: Castle Grayskull and Snake Mountain.

And what about the Sectaurs? Too buggy?