For all the hype, you will not see Levi Johnston’s baby maker in Playgirl. Told you he wasn’t a gay icon.
Playgirl blames Levi’s handler Tank Jones for refusing to let photographers deliver the goods. Says mag rep Daniel Nardicio: “We’re thrilled with the photos we got, and are confident people will love them. Although there may be glimpses, we did not get full on frontal nudity.”
Which is a stupid thing to say! You should have kept us guessing!
In the run-up to the photo shoot, Levi wouldn’t confirm whether his wang would be on display, which had us yearning for it more. But now that we don’t get to see full frontal? We might as well skip the membership on Playgirl.com, and refuse to pick up a physical copy of the magazine (they’re doing a special print run for this centerfold), and just wait for the photos to appear on some web forum dedicated to hot guys showing it off. Which is pretty much what we do anyhow.
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
Funny, then, that Levi’s own son Tripp has now shown off more willy in a glossy magazine than his papa.
Casper
Won’t waste my time on this one…..Just skip it for sure.
Jacqui Smith
Shame that. I was really looking forward to it.
roger
wow. i can’t believe they announced this. worst marketing decision ever as a ton of people might have actually purchased even a one month subscription online to see if he actually went full frontal. dumb move.
DSNX
@Roger
I thought the same thing, but then it dawned on me that this is probably smart PR/damage control for Playgirl.
At this point, the scrutiny of sales and circulation figures couldn’t possibly have lived up to the hype.
Nardicio has effectively preemptively placed the blame in Johnston’s camp.
Meowzer
you mean the internet lied to us? gee, that’s the last time i’ll believe rumors, “insiders say” and publicists. i guess now someone will tell me the tooth fairy and santa aren’t real either.
what’s that sucking sound you hear? the air out of the few last remaining people that had any interest in playgirl. may as well kiss it goodbye now.
walt
I’m certainly not interested anymore…
YellowRanger
I can still fap to this.
Drew Jaimme
Hmmmmm… you know there is a “part 2” for this story. Playgirl will need to increase sales and Levi will need money. Suddenly, Levi’s dick will be on display.
drewbrown
someone should sue playgirl for false advertising.
Come On
Baring all for Playgirl was all downside risk for Levi Johnston. That he didn’t do it shows that either he or his handler, or both, have some brains.
Paul
Levi without his Johnson is like porn without sex, like Carrie P. without her fingers…. just a dumb tease…. so sad, I’m devasted by this news.
Paul
Oops, meant, “devastated”…
christopher di spirito
I’m sure Levi is saving his fuck stick for his porno film debut.
Observer
So what else is new? All one had to do was look at Sarah Palin and figure from there what a disappointment this HAD to end up being and Queerty proved it.
I kept telling my coworkers this guy is no dummy. If I could walk away with $100k plus for showing nothing but my flabby backside I would have done the same thing. Levi is a low-life in the same mold as Joe the Plumber and his dummy of a future mother-in-law.
Come on gay community. Can we please go back to pretending we have what is referred to as common sense and leave this 1980’s looking hustler standing alone on Santa Monica Blvd and Fountain Ave (where he will no doubt be after he “blows” all the money)? I mean really!
Rainfish
He’s in a bitter child-visitation dispute with the “Family Values” Palin klan right now. Perhaps this is a good legal move — who knows. Maybe if he defoliated his pubes (like so many of the adolescently inclined young men nowadays) possibly there may have not been that much of a difference down there between him and the kid anyway.
So we’ll just have to leave it up to the imagination; even if imagination is the antithesis of the internet.
downtown
oh Levi…playing coy huh? I like my men nice a simple but mysterious…quit playing games with my heart.
ossurworld
Levi is a nice boy.
Jacqui Smith
@YellowRanger
Oh, I’ll fap to it alright! I just won’t be guilted into paying for Playgirl afterward. Same as after that lame excuse of a “full-frontal” shoot with Marcus Patrick. Come on now! Silhouette penis? I can see the precise contours of the head. You really think this counts as not going all the way? Please.
Attmay
This guy’s gonna be on a Deadbeat Dad list in five years. I can’t believe gay guys acted like this Billy Carter-caliber celebrity was hot shit. On second thought, maybe I can.
Bristol sure dodged a bullet.
dontblamemeivotedforhillary
LEVI is an anagram of EVIL! Just ask Sarah!!!
MissUnderstood
nardicio is a fraud.
terrwill
Wonder how much Scarah Pallins organization paid him NOT to show the north pole?????
Sebs
I won’t care
insufferable_know_it_all
And you want to slam us women for “fawning” over Adam Lambert. Yet, here you are “fawning” over a straight guy. I don’t have a problem with it. But I have a problem with you being hypocrites.
romeo
Not hypocritical all. WE know we’re not going to hit that. It’s just for laughs.