One of our most popular stories from last week involved a straight guy responding to being hit on by a gay guy like a true mensch.
In case you missed it, you can read his awesome reaction here.
We wanted to hear from other evolved straight guys out there — here’s the chatter on Whisper.
Note — to the guys who use getting hit on by gay men purely as a self-esteem booster, you may want to reconsider. You’re not helping anyone at the end of the day, least of all your own misguided self worth.
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
But we’ll still take it over rampant homophobia any day.
Here’s what guys are saying:
Phillip Bernal
I have joined a men’s group that has a demographic of 80% hetero, and the rest openly Gay or Bi Men. and men can be just as vain as women. many men both straight and gay enjoy the attention PERIOD! no matter where it comes from… 🙂
Will Glitzern
Just don’t tell a straight guy he’s gay, even if you’re 100 percent sure. He’ll end your friendship rather than face it.
BJ McFrisky
For a site that’s “Free of an agenda . . . except that gay one,” you guys certainly are obsessed with the sexuality of straight guys.
Derrick Lewis
That’s amazing how many guys like the attention from gay men
Scotty O. Curtis
I’m so glad we can bolster their fragile little egos.
tham
I hate Whisper…it so fake.
Desert Boy
A compliment feels like you’re doing something right. It feels good to be on the receiving end of a compliment.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
Hey straight guys stop culturally appropriating our narcissism!
Michiel Naude
Mmm,it’s the male ego..
GG
My experience is that straight guys always reaffirm their straightness just before they put their clothes back on.
Captain Obvious
Here we go with the straight worship again. And the irony of complaining about straight women wanting to make us their pets but then swooning when a straight guys tries it.
How is this different? We’re not around to fluff their egos. Get real.
Reminds me of a guy a few years ago who literally bordered on stalking me after I stopped talking to him when I had this exact scenario happen. “Are you gay or straight?”, he answers straight, and my crush ended there so I moved on. Next thing I know I’m seeing him everywhere and he’s all pissed off because I won’t talk to him anymore. He was the one coming on to me and I realized he was getting off on the attention when he revealed he was straight so I took it away.
They don’t care about you as a person, you’re just there to make them feel like the hottest guy on the planet. Look how the pathetic little gay guy is so obsessed with me even though he knows I’m straight he follows me everywhere till I dismiss him.
Wake up… anyone who falls for this mess. It’s worse than what some girls do to us because the straight guys are purposely trying to emasculate you at the same time.
DarkZephyr
@BJ McFrisky: your words don’t fit the article, as this is not an example of obsession over straight sexuality. These straight men made comments that are specifically about gay men, so it actually fits with the theme of this particular news blog.
@Captain Obvious: while I respect your opinion and agree that we don’t exist for the sake of their egos, for my part I was happy to read these because I am tired of the old heterosexual threat of violence if we accidentally hit on a straight guy. These seems to indicate that that trend could be coming to an end. Perhaps the days of “I don’t want them lookin’ at me!” are coming to a close. That would be a good thing in my book.
Ridpathos
I always feel flattered when a woman hits on me or flirts with me. But I feel bad for possibly having led them on (if I was overly friendly or such in my tone).
alphacentauri
@BJ McFrisky: LMAO too true. Most hetero men I know do not like getting hit on by gay men. The worst are the ones that assume because I’m bisexual that it means I want every single man I see including them, and that I want every single woman I see which is not true.
Baba Booey Fafa Fooey
@Captain Obvious: You’re right.
Steven Burr
Really, ’cause I have no problem hitting on ’em!
gaym50ish
The homophobes who complain, “They better not hit on me!” are usually guys you wouldn’t touch with a 10-foot pole. They needn’t worry that we’ll hit on them.
alphacentauri
@Captain Obvious: Well said. It’s also annoying how hetero men assume that we automatically want them and every man we see; but the way some LGBT people worship heterosexual men or lust over them does not help.
martinbakman
“Hearing a compliment from a gay guy means the WORLD to me.” <– A straight guy wrote that? Uhmmmm…. OK.
Avery Alvarez
I’m not here to bolster the ego of anyone, especially straight guys.
But you stroke mine, and I will definitely stroke back.
Giancarlo85
The mandatory whisper article on Queerty… more money transferred into the paypal account. Straight guys aren’t going to flirt back. If they flirt back, they aren’t straight. This obsession with straight men needs to end.
@BJ McFrisky: And you’re obsessed with peddling right wing crapshoot politics on here.
Captain Obvious
@alphacentauri: Very true on both accounts. Honestly though most straight guys don’t interest me at all. They seem alright on paper and then you talk to them for more than 5 minutes and actually listen to what they’re saying.
I’ll never understand gay men who are ok with being emasculated by a straight guy in exchange for absolutely nothing at all.
Good luck to anyone hoping to find a straight guy friend(not sure why you need one either way) who’s over 25 and doesn’t feel the need to make jokes about your sexuality, make you seem like less of a man compared to him, or treat you like his own ego masturbation wand by making you think you have a chance with him.
NoCagada
So what? It’s just as flattering when I get hit on by straight women…some people really are capable of seeing a compliment for what it is.
Glücklich
Surely this can’t be a Queerty Whisper post. Where are all the complaints about the Whispers only coming with young good-looking white guys?
Glücklich
@Glücklich:
Argh! “Only coming *from* young good-looking white guys.”
Manhattans have been flowing.
Giancarlo85
@Glücklich: I don’t really care for the stock images. The quotes are all made up though… probably by gay men who constantly fantasize about straight men.
Kevin Duhadaway
They love it, even if they won’t admit it!! I’ve been with quite a few straight guys!!
Baba Booey Fafa Fooey
@Captain Obvious: exactly.
Jonathan Cortez
I’ve ran into many like that lol…they love feeling wanted and they enjoy it.
Josh447
Wow tell me it ain’t so. I’m amazed at the number of guys that are falling for this. It’s obvious by the syntax it was all written by the same person.
Mikah92
Straight guys I work with are quite flirty with me,and the feeling is not reciprocated.I pay them no mind.Just because I’m Gay,doesn’t mean that I desire your attention.
SonOfKings
These whisperings are a load of bull. Straight guys don’t want any kind of attention from Gay men, good or bad. They view us to be lower than fourth class women and our opinions about their looks are not valid. Basically, they don’t care about us. And that’s all the more reason to stop being so focused on them. They are not our prize.
Giancarlo85
@Kevin Duhadaway: If you been with these so called “straight” guys, that means they aren’t straight. Stop fantasizing. Straight men aren’t going to sleep with other men.
Glücklich
@NoCagada:
Agreed. I’m flattered, since I’m of the belief women are notoriously picky about men as evidenced by the number of my women friends who complain about the paucity of good guys around and these are smart, accomplished women who take care with their appearance.
That kind of thing goes both ways, too. Who doesn’t enjoy being complimented? Not even trying to get in someone’s pants but genuinely expressing appreciation of someone’s accomplishments and/or appearance.
onthemark
Although most of these Whisper things are pretty dumb, some people here are reading way too much into this one. I think I get it.
Only once did I ever do this. A big party – a cute straight guy, lefty politics, environmentalist, happy stoner type, for me he had it all (both looks and psychologically)… we talked for hours on the porch (typical 3-decker Boston house), totally avoiding the main party, and this was HIS doing because being mildly autistic myself, I always take cues from others. (Plus I hate parties in general!) So after several hours of talking about Joe Strummer and the Middle East and the MBTA and salmon fisheries and what-not, I finally asked him, well if you’re really THAT straight, and you’re single, why did you waste the whole night getting stoned with a gay guy on the porch, instead of trying to meet some girl in the party? He said, “well, you’re fun to talk to, you’re relaxing… and I guess I like the attention?” (sigh… that ? at the end.)
He eventually asked “well, if you wanted to have sex with me” [lol – “if”?] “what exactly would you want to DO?”, so I said I would blow him (actually I had a few wilder fantasies than that but I left it as vanilla as possible, & c*cksucking is my favorite thing anyway) and he said… “ummm, sorry, I really don’t think I could, I’m really very heterosexual.” !!! – I got the impression he’d already done the Kurt Cobain thing of trying to have sex with guy ONCE just to prove he was not homophobic.
My best friend, who was nearby and observed much of this during the night (in fact he dragged me to this stupid party), he was amused but disgusted and told me later, “That’s the most ridiculous thing I ever saw. You could have got that guy! Fuck, there was coke there and I should have got you some.” But I doubted such a environmentalist, vegetarian health-nut, stoner type was the cocaine type anyway.
Ah, the ’90s. A fun memory, but a lesson NOT to fall in lo-o-o-o-ove with straight guys. Or even “heteroflexible” guys, if he was that. But I can totally believe that some of them enjoy the attention!
onthemark
@Glücklich: Agree. Compliments from women are nice!
SonOfKings
I’ll try this at the gym tonight with the straight boys in the weight room, and we’ll see what happens.
drivendervish
It’s nice to hear from straight guys who are comfortable in their own sexuality. It should always be flattering when someone else finds you attractive regardless of their sex. The only reason it would bother a straight guy is if he’s sexually insecure and it is these same men who are the fag bashers.
Curtispsf
These Whisper quotes are written by some old over the top drag queen who gets off on stoking gay men’s fantasies. It’s a Gay “Ann Landers” column. Really…all gtood looking cute 20s/30s types. Please, get a grip…
dean089
I’ll tell you what, I’ve had more straight guys say “Thanks” and be flattered than have said “Euw, as if!” like most gay guys do. In the end it’s all about being a nice person and feeling good about the universe, even if it’s only momentary.
Giancarlo85
@Curtispsf: This article is called click and bait. Completely devoid of logic or any real honesty.
onthemark
@dean089: I can believe that – there’s an old-fashioned TYPE of gay guy who is socialized to be BITCHY – even in response to compliments. This is separate from chronological age since a lot of younger gay guys are still stuck in the old-fashioned bitchiness, as is always evident here in Queerty comments!
Giancarlo85
@onthemark: This article isn’t real. It is just fantasy. So off the mark again?
jcmofungi
I love when masculine gay guys hit on me. I am straight but do enjoy when a dominant woman makes me pleasure another man… it is humiliating as a straight man but i will admit i have enjoyed having a man use me like a woman while my lady watched, and she enjoyed it as well. I have always enjoyed being a bit of a tease to men and women. Was working in west hollywood and always wore tight fitting pants and loved the attention my butt got. I didn’t mind guys grabbing my ass, or when at a bar or club having a guy come up and grind against me, i would grind and push into them. But alas, i didnit mostly to get them to buy my drinks… i guess i am just a bitch ass whore like that lol. But i love the attention and apparently guys and ladies and those in between find me sexy and charming and good looking. On a fair note i was involved with a TS porn actress for over a year and do enjoy penis as much as vagina when it is on a female body. Never did get into the porn industry though i would have no qualms being gay for pay. But i am just a whore when it comes to sex, will do anything sexually to please anyone.
YaDontSay
Gay guys are some of the sweetest people on the planet – and you just can’t help but love them.
But that’s not all of them.
I’m straight and don’t mind being hit on by hit on in an open way.
To my mind, there are only two genders – men and women.
And you’re either a man or a woman – regardless of whether you inhabit a male or female body.
Being hit on in an open way is comfortable because you can be polite about rejecting the overture.
What’s a WHOLE lot less comfortable is when a gay guy hits on you in a creepy and unnatural way – it’s just stomach-churning and always elicits a very negative response from me.
That said, I also get grossed out when unattractive women come on to me non-verbally and strong … it’s like ‘Are you *cking serious ?’