How do you cope with a tough breakup? Well, if you’re Natalia Provatas, you pretend to switch genders and bulk up with muscle, then lie to a bunch of gay men.
Natalia had just ended a five-year relationship and was feeling a little anxious, so she started posing as a hunky man on Grindr. Why? Well, that’s a little unclear. In an essay about the experience, she mentions that her gay friend Andrew was complaining about how hard it is to date with Grindr, and she says she wanted to prove him wrong. Later on, she confesses that she was using the imaginary profile as a way to avoid intimacy with the new man in her life. So, that’s awesome.
Natalia learned some important lessons:
- Men on Grindr are eager to talk about/engage in sex acts
That’s actually pretty much the only lesson. Make note, everyone, in case you were not already aware of this fact.
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Eventually, she figures out that it’s more rewarding to actually interact in real life, and grows bored of Grindr, just like everyone else. She also discovers that making yourself vulnerable to another person is a little scary. Okay.
Mostly, the takeaway here is that if you are flirting with a really hot guy on Grindr and he sends a couple of mismatched photos and then refuses to meet up, he’s probably a navel-gazing woman using you to work through her own emotional baggage. So, beware.
tada-no
Do people notice that these days guys in bars rarely interact with others outside their cliques of friends they roam around with? You can’t meet people in clubs; grindr is nuts so what else is left?–Oh join the gay poetry club. lol
Gigi Gee
“Do people notice that these days guys in bars rarely interact with others outside their cliques of friends …” It’s been that way since time began. I have a few friends who are fearless and have no trouble meeting guys; one is just average looking but he’s so friendly out-going he’s dated guys who were “way out of (his) league” according to him. The rest stand around and complain that guys never interact outside of the cliques of friends.
viveutvivas
Really darling, if you post a false picture of a model a lot of men are going to want to have sex with that model. Jeez, what a dumbass broad.
viveutvivas
@tada-no, @Gigi Gee, there is truth to both of your statements. People don’t go out to meet new people as much because of these apps. And yes, if you are very outgoing you are going to have an easier time, but how many of us are fortunate enough to be really outgoing?
balehead
This is just more passive man-hate by feminists using gay men like they always do….
Cam
The premise of her essay seems false. She never had any intention of meeting anybody off the app, so in some ways says that interacting with people in person has more rewards. But she seems to miss the part that most of the people she was talking to WERE looking to meet. She just couldn’t because she was not who she was claiming to be.
I can’t believe this essay got any attention.
katbox80
@balehead: Yup. Like that lesbian that was collecting dick pics and putting them up for display. Hope they sued her ass.
Dixie Rect
What a dumb bitch.
drivendervish
If this qualifies as a story worth publishing, where do I apply for a job? This “story” wrote itself and I am pretty sure I could write one about bubblebutts (1 word or 2, I’ve always wondered) and the Silver underwear campaign. Oh yeah, I almost forgot! That ground breaking story revealing that gay men are more likely to have BB sex with a good-looking guy as opposed to an “average” guy. Shocking! That’s at least 1/2 of your home page that I could have created while riding the subway to work. Which I guess would give me more time to give the underwear models a kneepad interview after I got there. Yup, I’m in! sign me up! Just let me when I can start to work at your sweatshop.
tdx3fan
@viveutvivas: Being really outgoing is not something that comes easily to most people. It is something that you have to force yourself to do. Get involved in an activity that puts you in front of people, and force yourself to make a contribution. It does get easier with time.
Callum
@drivendervish: Two words with a hyphen, surely?
balehead
She’s awful…Could you imagine the outrage if a male reporter had done this on a female or lesbian site??…
balehead
She basically wrote an anti-gay article…..she should be fired….
pierrot
Natalia needs to tell her friend Andrew to stop looking for a boyfriend on Grindr. Jeez.. No one is looking for a serious relationship there. Try other websites, seriously!
SteveDenver
The quest for immediate dick really hit its zenith with Grindr. I wonder what the next evolution in shortening the journey from strangers to physicality will be.
I feel for her gay friend Andrew trying to date in the age of Grindr, but he can’t be the only one looking for more than a hook-up.
SteveDenver
@balehead: How is the article anti-gay? It may not be flattering, but it’s hardly anti-gay.
NoelG
@balehead: How many misogynists post here? Or is there just one who posts under various names?
nonnie
@balehead, @Dixie Rect: anti-gay? she’s awful? she should be fired? dumb bitch? Seriously?! Did what she write or the fact that she went on Grindr and pretended to be someone she wasn’t affect your life in some way? I’m guessing no…I’m also guessing a lot of people on dating sites straight and gay pretend to be people they are not, all the time. So come down off your soapbox.
ps: @ balehead: As a gay woman, feel free to troll our dating sites disguised as a lesbian.
nonnie
@balehead, @Dixie Rect: anti-gay? she’s awful? she should be fired? dumb bitch? Seriously?! Did what she write or the fact that she went on Grindr and pretended to be someone she wasn’t affect your life in some way? I’m guessing no…I’m also guessing a lot of people on dating sites straight and gay pretend to be people they are not, all the time. So come down off your soapbox.
ps: @ balehead: And as a gay woman, feel free to troll our dating sites disguised as a lesbian.