Last weekend director Zack Snyder hit the G-spot of every comic book geek (us included!) when he informed those the crowd at Comic-Con 2013 in San Diego that Superman and Batman would share the big screen for a sequel to this summer’s Man Of Steel which Snyder will direct. This may be ultimate wish fulfillment for many a fanboy, but we’ve thought about some other popular characters we’d love to see share the big screen. Sure, we’re salivating at the thought of these two heroes in tights in one flick (Batman has yet to be cast, but drool-inducing Henry Cavill will return as Superman), so not take this opportunity to dream up some other perfect pairings for some glorious gay-centric cinema?
Carrie Bradshaw and Oliva Pope
Sex and politics go together like a horse and carriage. Oh, wait…that’s sex and marriage. Well, we think sex and politics go together much better anyway. Just ask Anthony Weiner or Mark Sanford or anyone on the Hill. So why not Sex and Scandal? We could all put that dreadful SATC movie sequel behind us and it’s certainly no secret that the franchise could use a definitive dose of racial diversity. Plus, we think Olivia Pope could get some true perspective from Carrie and her gal pals who will liquor her up, get her properly laid and tell it to her like it really is.
David Fisher and Dexter Morgan
Daytime soaps have been doing it for decades, and if Adam Sandler and Eddie Murphy can do it ad nauseam, we see no reason why Dexter (Michael C. Hall) couldn’t meet his devilishly handsome doppelganger David Fisher, the gay undertaker from Six Feet Under (also played by Hall). We know Morgan gets his jollies murdering people, so it’s not so far flung to think their paths might cross in some deliciously twisted, homoerotic, narcissistic scenario, right?
James Bond and Wolverine
Of course we’re talking Daniel Craig here (sorry Pierce and Tim). Any excuse to get these two together will work for us. But we’re thinking that Bond goes beyond the flirtation he had with Javier Bardem in Skyfall and goes full-throttle (or full-frontal—we won’t complain) for Wolverine. With claws like that, think of the possibilities! But just have these two take their shirts off and, well, the script will write itself.
Sally Bowles and Fanny Brice
Want to see gay heads implode with raging jubilation and frenzied hysteria? Here’s the deal: We’ll ignore the time difference between original films, and just let our sheer giddiness drive the proceedings. Fanny can find Sally slinging drinks at a rundown barroom on Berlin’s border and convince the chanteuse to retake the stage—with her in tow—and the two can turn that dive bar into…no, not Burlesque, but the cabaret of every gay boy’s dreams. Or how about anything with Babs and Liza? We’d be OK with that, too.
Julian Kaye and Vivian Ward
Let’s see where these two hoes are some 40 years later for Richard Gere’s American Gigolo character and 30 years later for the giddy, bubble-bathing hooker with a heart of gold played by Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. Sure, we’ve always been curious about what happens to rentboys after they turn 30, but we really want to know what happened to that gorgeous nest of red hair and if Julian stayed in the bedding-dames game. And, of course, Hector Elizondo can show up since he was in both original flicks anyway.
Superman and…anybody or anything!
Henry Cavill could read a phone book for two hours topless or just stand and brood next to any inanimate object…like Keanu Reeves or a box of hair. We’d be there. Let’s just look at him for two hours.