The latest leak from the S.S. Obama is that Arizona Governor Janet Napolitano has been tapped to run the Department of Homeland Security. Since Napolitano is an unmarried woman who's um– sort of mannish, this means we get to spend the next four years hearing jokes about our borders being protected by flannel wearing Amazons. She certainly makes previous Homeland Security chiefs Tom Ridge and Michael Chertoff look like sissies.

The problem is, Napolitano says she's not a lesbian. She's been saying it for years and "if it looks like a duck" is not a compelling case for determining someone's sexuality. This has made all the gays in Arizona all kinds of peeved, as she publicly opposes same-sex marriage. Back in 2003, long before he came to New York and mucked up The Village Voice for good, Michael Lacey was a rapscallion columnist in Phoenix where he debated at length the most pressing issue of just which side Governor Napolitano's toast was buttered:

"If Governor Janet Napolitano isn't a lesbian, I'll eat your hat. She is a walking, one-woman LPGA tour all by herself.

It may be the thing I like best about her.

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Ahhh!

Not content with trouncing gay rights in Arizona, California, Florida and 27 other states, right-wing organizations are looking to start up anti-gay initiatives elsewhere.

So says Christian Coalition for America president Roberta Combs:

The American people are proud of their fellow citizens in the states of California, Florida and Arizona for upholding traditional marriage between one man and one woman.

Christian Coalition of America will continue to fight to ensure that government serves to strengthen and preserve, rather than threaten, our families and our values.

Are we the only ones envisioning greedy, brain sucking zombies?

So, it's official - gay marriage has been banned in Florida:

Florida voters have narrowly approved adding language to the state constitution that bans same-sex marriage.

The constitution will define marriage as only between a man and a woman. Florida already has a prohibition against gay marriage in state law, but supporters say the new definition was important to prevent court rulings allowing same-sex marriage like those in Massachusetts, California and Connecticut.

With 99 percent of the expected vote counted early Wednesday, the amendment had just over 62 percent support. It needed 60 percent to pass.

Meanwhile, in John McCain's home state of Arizona, voters also decided to prohibit same-sex nuptials. Change may have come to America, but perhaps not for all of us. Shame…

Nearly two years after announcing his candidacy, Senator Barack Obama has been elected as the 44th President of the United States. And, unlike years past, Obama's victory was clear-cut: the Senator won 349 electoral votes. He needed 270 to clinch the office.

Taking the state a bit after midnight last night in Chicago, Obama opened his acceptance speech with some of the most inspiring words ever uttered in our nation's history:

If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible; who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive in our time; who still questions the power of our democracy, tonight is your answer.
…
Its the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Latino, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disabled and not disabled - Americans who sent a message to the world that we have never been a collection of Red States and Blue States: we are, and always will be, the United States of America.

The politico went on to declare that "change has come to America," before concluding:

This is our chance to answer that call. This is our moment. This is our time to put our people back to work and open doors of opportunity for our kids. To restore prosperity and promote the cause of peace. To reclaim the American dream and reaffirm that fundamental truth that out of many we are one.

Obama's rival, Senator John McCain, offered an exceptionally gracious and teary concession speech. Though his supporters in Arizona booed at the mention of Obama's name, McCain urged them to rally behind their new president:

These are difficult times for our country, and I pledge to him tonight that I will do all in my power to help him lead us through the many challenges we face. I urge all Americans who supported me to join not only in congratulating him, but offering our next president our good will and honest effort to find the necessary compromises to bridge our difference.

Watching the results last night, we were in a bit of shock when Obama was announced the winner - had we done it? Had our nation really elected a black president? Yes. Sitting here, this morning, a bit hung over and exhausted, we're getting a bit misty as the reality set in - hundreds of years of oppression and racism were stomped. Surely division will continue to plague this great nation, but never before have the American ideals been as clear, vibrant and promising.

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The Arizona Daily Star's editorial staff did the right thing this weekend when they came out against Proposition 102, a ballot measure meant to define marriage as between one man and one woman.

Citing the state's already existing ban on gay marriage, the journos made clear that Proposition 102 has far-reaching - and dangerous - impact:

At best, Proposition 102 is an effort to keep same-sex couples from ever having the right to marry in Arizona. At worst, it is the first step toward possibly ending legal benefits for people who are in same-sex relationships.

Many large companies in Arizona offer gay couples the same kind of benefits afforded to heterosexual couples. If Proposition 102 passes, conservative activists could attempt to take away those benefits based on their opinion that gay marriages are wrong.

A good reason to reject this proposition can be found in Michigan. That state's voters passed a similar constitutional amendment in 2004. Once the new definition of marriage became part of Michigan's Constitution, court actions resulted in the loss of domestic-partner benefits for state employees by 2007.

The piece goes on to assert that gay unions do not threaten marriage, as the right would like you to believe, and that Proposition 102 amounts to nothing more than conservatives trying to "legislate morality."

Activists opposing Arizona's ban on gay marriage unleashed some shenanigans this weekend:

More than 100 campaign signs that support Proposition 102 have been vandalized or stolen, according to a campaign spokesperson.

The signs promote a yes vote, which would define marriage in Arizona as between one man and one woman. A spokesperson for the campaign said the damage has totaled nearly $6,000.

We can't condone illegal activity, but, c'mon, this is kind of awesome.

The editors of Arizona's Tucson Citizen know where they stand on Proposition 102, the a ballot measure aimed at defining marriage as between one man and one woman:

The proposition is unnecessary: There's already an Arizona law banning gay marriage. And despite claims by its advocates of the modesty of the proposal's intentions, its passage would hurt the state.
…
You don't have to be a left-wingnut jurist, however, to see that a ban is wrong. The justices of the California Supreme Court, which earlier this year overturned that state's gay marriage prohibition, aren't "activist."

Six of the seven justices were appointed by Republican governors, and they saw the law for what it was - discrimination.

Social conservatives, unfortunately, are slow learners.

Two of Arizona's top Catholic bishops are lending their voices to the state's forthcoming battle on gay marriage, which will be on the ballot this November:

In a pastoral letter, Thomas Olmstead of Phoenix and Gerald Kincanas of Tucson said Proposition 102 "is in alignment with our deeply held moral beliefs regarding marriage." And without a constitutional provision, the pair say current laws which define marriage in Arizona as solely between one man and one woman could be overturned.

Olmstead was out of the state on personal business. But Kincanas told Capitol Media Services he sees nothing improper about urging people to put the church's view on marriage into the state constitution.

"The church has always and will continue to address issues especially that are related to moral and ethical principles," he said. "We believe that marriage is a sacred relationship, that it is at the heart and core of society."

Sometimes we read shit like this and just think, "Blah, blah, blah." Sigh.

Words, they say, matter - especially when dealing with potentially discriminatory legislation:

Arizona voters will be told when they go to the polls that it already is illegal for gays to marry in this state.

Secretary of State Jan Brewer agreed late Tuesday to add that fact to the description of Proposition 102 that will appear on the November ballots. Approval would add a same-sex-marriage ban to the state constitution.

Brewer — along with supporters of the measure — originally did not want that language used, saying it would only confuse voters. But Attorney General Terry Goddard, who has to approve the ballot summaries she writes, said the addition was necessary.

Unlike the ballot measure itself…

The hits just keep coming for Democratic National Committee chairman Howard Dean. And when we say "hits," we mean video of his testimony in the ongoing discrimination lawsuit filed by former gay outreach director Donald Hitchcock.

In case you're just joining us, Hitchcock claims key DNC leaders conspired to sack him as retaliation for his boyfriend Paul Yandura's public criticism of the party. Dean denies the allegations, claiming Hitchcock failed to seduce the gays.

This particular video - part of which has been blacked out for its confidentiality - has less to do with Hitchcock's firing and more to do with the Democratic Party's alleged inclusion, specifically with regard to the national convention's contentious gay goals.

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