Hold onto your hats, boys!

Village Voice gossip monger Michael Musto will soon appear nude on the paper's cover.

[Musto will spoof] the Bert Stern shots for New York magazine of Lindsay Lohan as Marilyn Monroe. Musto - who is both hairier and more modest than Lohan - posed in a blond wig, biting at a pink scarf, for photographer Howard Huang. Musto notes, "Lindsay did 250 crunches the night before her shooting. Well, I did 250 Nestle's Crunches."

Bravo, Musto, on your commitment to the cause, whatever that may be…