We have it on good authority that despite Details' reputation for being six beers away from turning queer, editor Dan Peres is a raging homophobe, that those racist and offensive "Gay or…" pieces that he's been forced to apologize for are composed laughing at us instead of with us and that the gays on staff are constantly subjected to Mickey O'Rourke-esque fag jokes.

But we like Details. Those "Gay or…" pieces are pretty funny and we enjoy Michael "I write about hot gay sex, but don't actually do it" Chabon's ongoing column in the magazine. Plus, carrying around a copy of Details in your back pocket is hanky code for "Likes to fuck metrosexuals/ likes to be fucked by metrosexuals"– we forget which side means which.

The inclusions of Clay Aiken and "pregnant man" Thomas Beatie in their annual "Power 40 List" is a perfect example of the queasy/happy dichotomy Details heaps upon the gay reader.

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Details ain't gay, but that doesn't mean they can't get a little top left inspiration from the homos at The Advocate. Ryan Seacrest headline does look a whole lot like that Lance Bass teaser, except for girth and length.

On a related note, we can't help but wonder if, by the glossy transitive property, Details is also looked toward US Open's Tennis, which The Advocate emulated last September.

What a world! What a world!

Details recently released their "Power 50" issue. Besides being intrigued by Kevin Federline's undeserved cover slot, we're absolutely enthralled by the list's familiar number nine winner: "The Other F-word".

If you take a look back, it appears that 2007 was the year of the F-word—but not the one you’re thinking of. America’s rent-a-quote harridan of hatred, Ann Coulter, used the word to slag presidential candidate John Edwards. Presidential candidate Bill Richardson used the Spanish version (maricón) to slam a guy on the Don Imus radio show. Controversy exploded after Isaiah Washington allegedly dropped the F-bomb on a fellow cast member of Grey’s Anatomy.

It’s a word that anyone who ever spent time in an American school yard is familiar with: faggot. But some bullies grow up, get famous, and keep on using it. “I hate gay people,” blurted former basketball star Tim Hardaway. Tucker Carlson bragged about having given a dude who tried to tap toes with him in a men’s room a taste of his bow-tied brutality (“I . . . hit him against the stall with his head, actually”). Hmmm. The word faggot, it seems, is on the tips of a lot of men’s tongues. They can’t stop thinking about it. Without it they’d be lost, and that makes you wonder who really has the power.

Between this and Out's "gay" debate, queer colloquialisms sure have been getting turned out. Too bad they're not getting worn out, huh? No wonder Details lists The Other F-Word's age as "forever young"

It's a sad, sad day in the media world.

Details magazine announced that it will no longer include the "Gay Or…" back page. The four-year old feature caused many a controversy, perhaps none as memorable as their Gay or Asian piece which, as Ad Age's Nat Ives points out, hinged on a plethora of stereotypes:

"White T-shirt: V-neck nicely showcases sashimi-smooth chest," one entry on the page said. "What other men visit salons to get, the Asian gene pool provides for free." In another spot: "One orders take-out sushi, the other delivers it."

That is just vile - forgetting Mexicans like that!

Details EIC Daniel Peres promises the mini-scandals had nothing to do with the feature's demise. It seems his team simply lacks the imagination to come up with more head scratchers: "Pissing people off is never really a problem for me. It had simply run its course. It was getting difficult coming up with good ideas." Last month's Gay or Straight sealed the deal.

Daniel Radcliffe's Harry Potter tour took him to the pages of closeted fag rag Details.

We haven't yet had to chance to fully dissect the Simon Garfield-penned piece - we're too captivated by these gorgeous shots snapped by Steven Klein.
From what we understand of the aforementioned article, Garfield spills some ink examining Radcliffe's evolution from four-eyed nerd warrior to dramatic - and comedic - wunderkind:

Ricky Gervais and his colleague Stephen Merchant, the team behind the original version of The Office, cast Radcliffe in an episode of Extras, putting him in a Boy Scout uniform for a role in a film about elves and investing his backstage character with a desperate quest for adulthood. “I’ve done it with a girl, intercourse-wise,” he tells a fellow actor, before flapping a huge condom in the air and saying, “Let’s hope it’s big enough!”

We'd say we feel bad lusting after an 18-year old guppy, but we don't. We do, however, feel bad about not feeling bad. That counts for something, right?

• Well, not really, but we bet the incarcerated producer behind Girls Gone Wild he'd love to profit off of Prison Guys Gone Wild.

• Details flippantly deliver the "truth": their rag's a total fag. Guess they really did deserve that GLAAD award.

• Whoopi headed to The View? That makes sense: she's kind of like a black Rosie O'Donnell. Only "not" gay.

• Boise State University and conservative Idaho Family Alliance's Bryan Fischer's "Transgender Bathroom Wars" continue. Honestly, we didn't know they had begun…

• We dont' understand a word of French singer Zazie's 1992 jam, "Sucre Sale", but we dig the homo-flavored, naked model filled video.

• Scandal-ridden congressman Randy "Duke" Cunningham denounced his anti-gay ways after buying a yacht from a bunch of butt pirates, according to Seth Hettena, author of Feasting on the Spoils. He told "Buoy Toys'" former owners,

I now vote pro-gay, and it's because of you [guys]… I'm sure I've met lots of gay people, but I've never met two guys that, you know, were outwardly gay and … that I would consider drinking buddies and friends and boating buddies and people I want to spend time with … that also said, 'Oh, by the way, I just happened to be gay.

The purchase even Cunningham to apologize to openly gay congressman Barney Frank for his homophobic potty mouth, according to Radar. The article also points out the yacht led to a bribery investigation that ended his career. We wonder if he's still keen on the queens.

Sure we love Jake Gyllenhaal. We haven’t even tired of the sudden barrage of films he’s been in this season like were with those Jude Law duds last year. We can even forgive his Toby McGuire sneer on the cover of the new Details. But inside the mag Jake reveals his take on the lovelorn gay cowboys he and Heath Ledger play in Brokeback Mountain. He procedes to confuse his own character’s sexuality:

He (Jake) doesn't believe Ennis and Jack are gay. "I approached the story believing that these are actually straight guys who fall in love," he says. "That's how I related to the material. These are two straight guys who develop this love, this bond. Love binds you, and you see these guys pulling and pulling and tugging and trying to figure out what they want, and what they will allow themselves to have."

When two men do a lot of “pulling and pulling and tugging” with one another it usually means one thing. They’re big flaming fairies.

But is Jake just trying to deflect those gay rumors following him around longer than crack in Whitney Houston’s system? Could be.

I've never really been attracted to men sexually, but I don't think I would be afraid of it if it happened.

God, what a tease.

• Sounds like Drudge creamed his pants over Anderson Cooper's proclamation that "going gray is like ejaculation" even more than we did.

• Speaking of ejaculate, STD cases in the gay community are on their way up, up, up. Someone please cue the Evangelicals. This is about when they start to claim this is God's way of punishing homos.

• Images from Gay.com didn't just magically appear on Mayor James West's computer after all. Yeah, obviously.

• Radar Magazine goes all kissy face and lists the top ten guy on guy movie smooches. Funny thing is we thought this article would only end up in the straight guy pages of Details.

• Saudi police busted up a gay beauty pageant before it even happened. Among the items they confiscated were large quantities of "sex toys." Um, what kind of beauty pageant was this going to be?

• Can't wait for it to come out next week? MTV.com is streaming Madge's new disc.

Apparently the queens, oops, editors over at Details got carried away celebrating their fake 5-year anniversary and forgot to, you know, edit the magazine.

The whole “we are all things to all people thing” does not fly with us fags over here at Queerty. And while you may helm a magazine with a real masthead and real covers and real fashion editorials, let me speak to you. You know, editor to editor. And I am a real editor thank you very much. At least I play one convincingly on the Internet.

Mr. Peres did you not notice this line in an article talking about the stupidity of half-tucking? “That faux tuck is meant to telegraph just the right amount of slapped-together disarray—but the disarray, alas, reads as all too engineered.”

Just like your response to the “Is Details gay?” question and just like your current cover. That is an all too engineered faux tuck that Mr. Phoenix is sporting. So are you saying faux tucks are bad for everyone but cover models and Hollywood actors? We don’t understand.

May I make a suggestion? Pick a side. Choose a sexual preference. And stop dressing your cover models in the same style you tell us normal folk to avoid.

In the Details September 2005 issue's Know+Tell section we are given three easy ways to sleep on a plane without the aid of our beloved dolls, Ambien and Xanax. Below are their three ideas to help you slumber drug free while flying high, not "high."

1. The Seat. Apparently, the back of the plane is the bumpiest. Details advises travelers to sit just behind the wings. Checking out SeatGuru is advised also. That site has seat specifications online for 25 different carriers.

2. The Gear. The (closeted) queens at Details then tell us to be wary of airplane pillows and blankets since they are not washed. Also, strongly encouraged are earplugs and eye masks.

3. The Diet. The last step to achieve drug-free rest while traveling is to monitor your diet. Diet Cokes and vodka sodas are strongly discouraged because caffeine and alcohol can disrupt sleep patterns.

While these steps seem to be wonderful pieces of advise we here at Queerty will have to rely on our reader's experience when testing these ideas out. Email us and tell us if it works. We love our Grey Goose and Ambien a little too much to give up so easily.