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• We can't provide anything other than this picture, for this shit-based drug may be the grossest, most revolting thing we've ever. It leaves us wondering - pleading, begging and praying - "Why?!" [Note the slang terms. Our favorite: "Butthash".]

Rev. Donald J. McGuire arrested for sexually assaulting boys:

A prominent Jesuit priest accused of sexually victimizing teenage boys who were his valets as he traveled the world leading Roman Catholic spiritual retreats was taken into federal custody yesterday in Chicago.

The priest, the Rev. Donald J. McGuire, was charged by the federal authorities with traveling to Switzerland and Austria to engage in sexual conduct with a minor. Father McGuire was convicted last year of sexually abusing two high school students on trips to Wisconsin.

So, he allegedly molested them and then made them drive him around? That's twisted.

Anti-gay Russian nationalists march in Moscow.

CONTINUED »

Will GOP Learn An Evolutionary Lesson?

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The Republicans' actions and words at this weekend's Values Voter Summit prove one thing: the party simply refuses to evolve. Editor Andrew Belonsky explains why the Grand Old Party needs to embrace change, look beyond the walls of social conservatism and expand its definition of family values.

CONTINUED »

Lindsay's Father Not So 'OK'

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Ain't that sweet? Lindsay Lohan's fresh outta rehab and hamming it up with dear old dad! Months of detox didn't take the starlet's sense of humor. She describes her third stint in a year: "It was a sobering experience." Oh, zinger!

Lohan's exclusive (!) interview with OK does take a serious turn when she confesses: "I hit rock bottom. Everything in my life came to a point where I had to make a decision." Yeah, we go to rehab every time we have to make a decision, too.

Meanwhile, aforesaid father Michael's got a new lady friend. And, shocker, she looks like a future version of dear daughter Lindsay.

Frightful!

Singer To Cough Up Stiff Fine

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Boy George just got a lesson in karma.

The queer entertainer had been scheduled for a 2005 launch performance at Los Angeles' Club GAY USA. In exchange for his presence and talents, George received about 10,000. Unfortunately Georgie Boy pulled out ten days before the Halloween appearance. Why? He had to deal with a coke charge back in London.

The infuriated club promoter, Kasia Saleh sued. After years of legal wrangling, Saleh's finally getting some payback. A judge ordered Boy George to cough up over £31,000 - or about $63,000!

At least it wasn't everything he owns…

Would Rather See This Man Suffer Than Legalize Doja


Stricken with muscular dystrophy, American citizen Clayton Holton's looking for a little relief - like a joint.

Unfortunately, our government continues to forbid medical marijuana. Hoping to find a sympathetic ear - or a great YouTube clip - Holton asked presidential candidate Mitt Romney if he'll allow medical marijuana. The answer: a resoundingly insensitive, flippant "no".

Do Mormon Republicans have a soul? Apparently not.

Coppers Searching Below The Belt

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Did a hard on kill Dean Johnson?

Authorities are investigating whether or not the New York nightlife staple died after mixing erection enhancers with anti-depressants and other drugs.

Cops want to know if a bad reaction to Viagra or Cialis could be behind the mysterious death of a New York gay-club legend who died in a Washington, D.C., apartment last month, a pal said.

Dean Johnson - the second man in several days to die in the apartment - may have had a bad reaction by mixing the erection-enhancing pill with other drugs or medication, according to pal Dale Corvino.

Corvino said Johnson traveled to D.C. to comfort an acquaintance, Steven Saleh, whose friend died in his apartment just days earlier…

If we were the coppers, we'd be looking less at erections and more at Saleh. Two bodies in a week? That's not a hard one…

George Michael Gets That He's A Joke

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George Michael decided to get in on the party and start making fun of himself. The scandal-prone singer will appear on BBC's Extras Christmas Special:

The one-off show sees 44-year-old Michael mocking his own well publicized behavior, including spoofing his own past drug and public bathroom sex antics. We all know it’s been an up and down year for Michael, but the singer certainly hasn’t lost any of his sense of humor!

Next up: an Easter special with Cheech Marin.

Daddy Rescues Little Girl, Uses Said Girl To Look Like Saint

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Lindsay Lohan will reportedly be leaving in-patient rehab at Cirque Lodge in Utah. Her father, Michael, says he's going to oversee her outpatient treatment:

I’m looking forward to spending the next week with her. We’ve been in constant phone contact. She’s in a great, great place now. I’ve never heard her so honest, contrite and focused.

Lindsay is weeding out all the bad. She’s taking a step back and re-evaluating her life. What she tells - her honesty and openness - has brought me to tears. It’s beyond words how proud I am of her.

Aren't we all? We'll be even more proud if she's learned to put that pussy away.

What Drugs Are We On?!

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Legendary singer Annie Lennox sat down with HX's Trenton Straube for a little pre-album release heart-to-heart.

Before the girls ended their chat, Trent had one last, pressing question:

TS: One last subject: dance mixes. You music has always been a staple on the dance floor. And you have remixes already slated for the single "Sing." You said you collaborate with art directors. Do you also work with the DJs and producers on the remixes?

AL: I'm going to be brutally honest here. I find a lot of it totally vacuous. People say you've got to have taken a lot of drugs before you "get it." I'm pretty sure that you have to take a lot of drugs. What kind of drugs are you gay guys taking?

Would you like that list alphabetically or in order of appearance…

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• 'Nuff said.

Turncoat John McCain on Larry Craig's return to the Senate: "I don’t think [his resignation] keeps him from attending the luncheon if he wants to.” Civil.

CONTINUED »

Needed Shower, Shave Before Big Show

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Marc Jacobs ain't having rumors he had drinks before his show this week.

The famously sober designer's show started two-hours late, leading some to wonder if he's fallen off the wagon. Gossip mongers placed him at New York's tony Mercer Hotel, where they say he hit it hard. Jacobs, however, insists he's as clean as a whistle and gives a big 'fuck you' to anyone who says otherwise:

That is bullshit! That is bullshit! was at the fucking office until the last fitting was over. I came back to the hotel — I hadn't been here in three days! I hadn't showered in three days! I slept on the couch in my office for 20 minutes three nights in a row — anyone at my office will tell you that. I got 20 minutes sleep Friday night, Saturday night, Sunday night. The first shower I had was Monday at 8 before the rehearsal of our show. I did not have lunch, I did not have drinks, I did not have tea at the Mercer, I walked through the lobby; I live in this hotel… I took 20 minutes to shower and shave — I stank like a raccoon! I could not go to the show like that.

44-year old Jacobs is reportedly so incensed he's threatening to move his show to Paris. No, Marc, don't go!

Related: Does Lindsay Lohan Have Ability To Learn?

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Starlet Lindsay Lohan's currently in her third rehab stint of the year. So, how's it going? Apparently not so well:

Lindsay Lohan has reportedly been caught taking drugs in rehab.

The ‘Mean Girls’ star was allegedly forced to undergo a drugs test by staff at Utah’s Cirque Lodge facility, and the results came back positive.

The famed fire crotch allegedly also got caught snogging a man in the toilet.

No, it wasn't Larry Craig.

(There's Always More To The Story)

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• Final leg of federal investigation into Mark Foley's illicit instant messages is slow going. It turns out neither Mark Foley nor the US House of Representatives will turn over the computers. (The FBI's unconstitutional snafu with Rep. William Jefferson reminded people of a 200-year old precedent. That means Foley can now self-censor "legislative business" from federally requested desktops. Convenient.)

• No illicit info in Foley emails. (An independent House review claims they took a look at Foley's emails through September 29th, the day he resigned. No nudie shots, allegedly.)

CONTINUED »

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Because ruining his own life simply isn't enough, Babyshambles shamble of a singer Pete Doherty decided to destroy his poor, defenseless kitty:

Pete Doherty's pet cat has been found to have traces of cocaine in its blood stream after being taken in for observation by vets, say reports.

The Babyshambles star owns a cat named Dinger, a slang word for syringe, which recently gave birth to a litter of five kittens.

One of the litter became ill and the singer was forced to take the kitten into the vet for tests, where the drug revelation was discovered.

Ug, what a prick. Why, oh why, would Kate Moss allegedly shack up with him again?

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Pot loving pop star George Michael did a bit of gardening for as part of 100 hours of DUI-related community service. Like a good - and court ordered - sport, Michael kept positive as he weeded a hostel's lawn.

I’m just like everyone else. If you do something stupid, you have to pay the price. I’ve been doing some gardening and really enjoyed it. I’ll do whatever they want me to do.

Not only does Georgie Boy (pictured, in Wham!-ier days) get to work out his green thumb, but he can make some new chums along the way! One hostel resident remarked, "Most of us are drug addicts or ex-drug addicts so we can maybe relate to him."

We've got no doubt…



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