You may not know this, but George Clooney has been the face of Martini vermouth since 2004. His ads often pop up on European television, where he thinks American audiences won't find him and realize, in addition to lending his name to charitable causes, he lends his name to corporate come ons.

Here’s his latest spot, which, like his previous ads, features Clooney with a moustache, and uttering the one word he knows in Italian.

But analyzing the ad under another context makes it more interesting. In 2005, Britain’s Code of Advertising changed the rules for liquor ads, requiring them not to link alcohol to “seduction, sexual activity or sexual success.” However, romance and flirtation are allowed, which explains Clooney’s PG chase of the object of his desire.

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Swishy straight man George Clooney let out his inner bitch yesterday: "[Said Clooney] on Peacemaker co-star Nicole Kidman’s pregnancy: 'At least she is older than 16.'"

That's a not-so-veiled swipe at the Spears Family's latest fuck-up: Jamie Lynn. It's worth noting that knocked up teenager JL's currently enrolled in a GED course. She's getting that adult education after y'all!

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Rupert Everett confirmed that he's writing and acting in a movie about Oscar Wilde. And, of course, the increasingly vocal actor used the occasion to criticize his peers. No, he didn't question George Clooney's sexuality, but Everett did piss on screenwriter David Hare and director Richard Eyre, who collaborated on Wilde biopic, The Judas Kiss:

Yes, I'm writing a screenplay of a film I'm hoping to get made with myself in it, about Oscar Wilde, after the trial, his life in exile…It's provisionally titled Sebastian Melmoth, after one of the aliases Wilde adopted after his downfall.
…
…Those people should never ever have thought about attacking the Wilde story, because they have no sympathy, or sensitivity or sensibility…

They're rigorously straight, the two of them

They cast Liam Neeson as Wilde - why? Because he's big and Irish.”

Everett's neither of those things, of course. He's just gay.

Rupert Everett simply can't stop talking shit! The gay actor recently ripped into Kate Moss and former friend Madonna for their "terrible" style. Now Everett's making waves for his comments on some of Hollywood's greatest actors, including "straight man" George Clooney. Via Huffington Post:

"[George] Clooney thinks that, provided he does films which are politically committed, he's allowed to do Ocean's 11, 12, and 13", he says. "But the Ocean's movies are a cancer to world culture. They're destroying us."

And Clooney the man? "He's not the brightest spark on the boulevard. He'll be president one day. Mark my words, if he's straight, he'll be president."

Meanwhile, Everett describes Diane Keaton, Al Pacino, Robert De Niro and other heavyweights as "parodies of themselves". No word on what Everett thinks of himself.

You either love or hate Chris Matthews (pictured, younger). There's really no middle ground with this MSNBC newsman. Some complain that he's too smug. Other's find him disinterested. We, for the record, love him. First of all, he's cute. Second of all, he talks gay all the time, like last night, when he addressed our nation's comedic obsession with Larry Craig and bathroom cruisers.

Matthews first brings up a talking Craig doll and then offered a clip of Boston Legal's James Spader defending William Shatner in a lewd conduct arrest. Says Spader: "We‘re actually sitting in a courtroom wasting tax dollars because my client had gas. He was constipated."

From there Matthews veers toward that George Clooney/Brad Pitt toe-tapping send-up and ends his brief segment with this:

Isn‘t it great how we Americans can laugh at—even at the most desperate of human acts?

My own response to the Craig story is to side with gay marriage. If we don‘t respect people, how do we expect them to respect themselves? Anyway, that‘s just my reaction.

And that's exactly why we love you, blondie.

The working girls and boys of this world may all fuck for money, but that doesn't mean they get the same respect - or disrespect.

In a thoughtful and timely post, former AOL blogger Richard Rothstein uses Republican hero Jeff Gannon as a jumping off point to examine the wild world of male prostitution:

The ubiquitous and profoundly influential role of the gay male prostitute in American culture is a subject that deserves much more scrutiny and consideration. It should pose many more questions and generate considerably more discussion in the mainstream media and among pundits. Instead the politics of the gay male prostitute is just there, regularly rearing it's rather prominent head at odd times and in so many diverse way.

I'm fascinated by two questions in particular and the real lack of examination of both. The first, of course, is why the male prostitute plays such a prominent role in our culture and the second is why we don't really examine that role with a serious in-depth discussion.

Rothstein also points a finger at Dancing With The Stars' Albert Reed, who allegedly had a "compromising" encounter with George Clooney.

Warning: Rothstein's post has some NSFW bits, namely: Jeff Gannon's penis.

Who says so-called straight men can't get bitchy? Our celeb-obsessed gender-fucked brother Mollygood passes on Page Six's In Touch lifted gossip that George Clooney and romance object Fabio went head-to-head last Friday.

…Clooney and gal pal Sarah Larsen were having dinner at L.A. eatery Madeo next to Fabio and a group of women. All was well until one of Fabio's pals started taking pictures of her friends. According to numerous eyewitnesses, Clooney, assuming the woman was taking snaps of him, asked her to stop - prompting Fabio to explain that the shots were of his group, not Clooney, and to tell the superstar, "Stop being a diva." Clooney started arguing back, and he and Fabio then got into a shoving match. "The waiters broke it up before it got out of hand," a witness told In Touch. Clooney then paid his check and left before finishing his meal.

According to another In Touch witness, Ron Marotto, "George looked annoyed when Fabio went to his table. George stood up, dropped the F-bomb and then went to push him…George was drinking…He wasn't drunk, but he certainly wasn't stone sober, either." Fabio's manager told the magazine, "George is lucky he didn't end up in the ER."

Huh? Oh…we get it: Fabio's manager invoked George Clooney's former money-maker, a show he hasn't been on for seven years. A for effort, F for dated reference. Winner: George Clooney.

George Clooney and Brad Pitt took a pot shot at Larry Craig. Literally. George Clooney couldn't attend the American Cinematheque ceremony honoring Julia Roberts. Rather than leaving an empty void where a tribute should be, Clooney sent along a little video. Marc Malkin reports:

George Clooney wasn't able to make it, but he sent a video tribute. Gushing over his Ocean's costar while sitting in a bathroom stall, Clooney suddenly found himself in a Sen. Larry Craig situation. Someone was in the next stall trying to tap shoes with the Hollywood hunk.

When Clooney jumped up and quickly opened the stall door next to him, he found the culprit to be Brad Pitt!

A wide-eyed Pitt joked, "I have a wide stance."

Um, right.

This isn't the first Larry Craig send up unleashed upon the world. And, we're sure, it won't be the last. If Craig has done anything productive during his Senatorial tenure, it's vanquish the once ubiquitous Brokeback references.

Every once in awhile an ostensibly "straight" man lets out a little bit of fag.

You can't tell by this snap, but CNN's Anderson Cooper's reacting to Whoopi Goldberg's enticement, "We will be right back with fall footwear for under 50 bucks."

Cooper's totally forgotten that our planet's in peril - the reason for which he appeared on the show. He's definitely thinking, "Shoes!"

Not convinced? Head to Gawker to watch the video. It'll take your breath away.

Meanwhile, we're not sure if George Clooney's playing princess in this picture, but he's looking a bit light…

• Ryan Gosling chatted up guests at Variety Screening Series of Lars and The Real Girl. He's obviously thrilled to play a delusional guy who falls for a doll.

&bull Chicago coppers beat lesbians?

• Mitt Romney does not approve of Democrat candidate's approval of gay approving books.

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George Clooney's totally topping age. We totally swooned in our pants when we so these pictures of the 46-year old actor at the Deauville Film Festival.

Though the bearded George butched it up for a bit, he's obviously in touch with his feminine side - and his eyeliner. Boy needs to tone it down a bit.

You're handsome, George. It's really not fair to be so pretty, too!

• It took George Clooney 29-years to get a star on the Hollywood walk of fame. The Harry Potter kids, Rupert Grint, Daniel Radcliffe and the absolutely stunning Emma Watson? Six years. That's gotta sting.

• Ugandan gay activists demand that anti-gay Ethics and Integrity Minister James Nsaba Buturo turn over his "death threats". Or else…

• The Anglican soap opera continues. The General Synod has backed a "covenant" dedicated to wrangling in gays and their liberal allies. Openly gay Bishop Gene Robinson may soon be an endangered species.

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• Eva Longoria and Tony Parker are now officially man and housewife (forgive us). They'll do it again tomorrow. Obviously they're desperate for attention (Oh, it hurts!).

• If Enrique Iglesias were gay, he'd go for George Clooney. And, apparently, have no imagination. (Sorry, Ricky Martin.)

• Shirley Phelps-Roper has been charged with child abuse after letting her 10-year old stomp a flag while protesting a soldier's funeral. If convicted, she could receive 3-months in jail. God willing…

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• Intern Joseph swears Jason Fox's "Aunt Jackie" will not only be the next big summer jam, but will change the course of dance forever. We're not convinced. Are you? (We do, however, like the track.)

• Will Brazil-based, Natal-born soccer player Richarlyson come out of the closet this weekend. All signs - and insiders - point to "yes".

• Our George Clooney fantasies just went out the window.

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