The gay debates rage hard in Jamaica, where Prime Minister Bruce Golding recently insisted he would never include a queer in his cabinet. Well, the public has been getting all sorts of hot and bothered on the same-sex subject. First we had a gay telling Golding to liven up his government with the lavender set, and now we have - well, something…

As a nation we are frothing with indignation that we are being forced to bend at the waist to accommodate the homosexual lifestyles.

We have our own social codes, but little does anyone know that we also have the perfect deterrent and punishment. For those lesbian women and gay men, our society should make mandatory the punishment by enforced consumption of large quantities of Scotch bonnet peppers.

This will cause severe burning at both the North and South poles (I try, like Oscar Wilde, to be delicate). The effects will be obvious and inflammatory and act as well as a deterrent.

So, who wants to come over this weekend and give this theory a go? We'll supply the toilet paper. And, yes, we're joking, just like whoever wrote this missive - we hope they're joking, at least…

A Jamaican gay activist has some advice for Prime Minister Bruce Golding: get yourself some gays.

Golding, of course, wouldn't approve of such a move, especially considering that just last month the politico declared his countrymen frown on the queers. And, what's more, he will not, under any circumstances, accept gay people into his cabinet.

Citing the prime minister's sliding poll numbers, however, an anonymous homo thinks the pinks would do Golding's administration good.

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Jamaican national Lashai Williams offers her distasteful thoughts on the gays:

This thing about gays and the rights they have and the rights they want is downright ungodly. If they want to be that way, it is their business; why make it everyone else's? Has anyone thought about the rights of the people who do not want their children exposed to that kind of nastiness?

Surprisingly, Williams does not condone anti-gay violence: "…Beating them will not make them stop being gay. They are sinning and the ones who are beating them are sinning, too." Truly a miracle…

Anti-gay singer Bounty Killer probably wants to kill some gays right about now. Like Beanie Man and Buju Banton before him, Killer's concerts have been felled by the fagalas. From the ever-ready Peter Tatchell's celebratory press release:

Bounty Killer, has had two of his three UK concerts canceled in the last week, following a campaign by the gay human rights group OutRage!

His concerts in Bradford and Birmingham were axed, losing him thousands of pounds in performance fees.

In Germany, Bounty Killer's performance in Essen was canceled and other German concert dates are now in doubt.

The Outrage! campaign extends all over Europe, including France and Belgium.

Bounty Killer previously boasted that the gays would be no match for him. He obviously underestimated the lavender set's determination.

One of the British clubs, however, claim the Outrage! protest had nothing to do with the concerts' cancellations, but because Killer missed his flight from Jamaica. They're now trying to reschedule the contentious event.

Finally, some good news from Jamaica!

The Caribbean nation typically comes up with regard to homophobic attacks. This morning, however, we hear that the Deputy Commissioner of Police is mulling a new program to train cops how to handle the homos. Said Mark Shields:

I think there is a place for minorities, whoever they are, to have the opportunity to speak to recruits during their initial [Jamaica Constabulary Force] training. Diversity is something that needs to be embraced. Therefore, the only way to do that is to train police officers so that they are no longer just citizens with a view and with prejudices.

The move comes after international activists - including Metropolitan Community Church - came out against the island and its apathetic government.

Jamaica's anti-gay reputation grows this morning. We gay folk have been deriding the rise of homophobic attacks for months, but now the NY Times has gotten in on the not-so-fun.

Being gay in Jamaica is not easy. For years, human rights groups have denounced the harassment, beating and even killing of gays here, to little avail. No official statistic has been compiled on the number of attacks. But a recent string of especially violent, high-profile assaults has brought fresh condemnation to an island otherwise known as an easygoing tourist haven.

“One time may be an isolated incident,” said Rebecca Schleifer, a researcher for Human Rights Watch who has studied the issue and regularly gets calls from the island from gays under attack. “When they happen on a repeated basis across the country, it is an urgent problem that deserves attention at the highest levels.”

Yeah, mon!