Our media-obsessed siblings over at Jossip weighed in on Hillary Clinton's recent water works. As part of their keen political investigation, they organized a handy dandy poll asking readers whether Clinton's tears were emotion, a set-up or exhaustion.

Apparently Jossip readers are torn on the matter (pictured).

We voted "A": Clinton's not a political cyborg. We do think, however, that exhaustion has something to do with it. Why can't we vote both?

Former boy bander Lance Bass made headlines today when he let another secret out off the closet: he married a girlfriend in Las Vegas.

Says the gay entertainer:

People do stupid things in the heat of the moment. I've been in Vegas where I've gotten married for like five minutes, but no one talks about it, though. In fact, the only reason we did it is because we wanted to get free drinks all night…and we didn't get one. We're like,`We just got married,' and they're like, `Ah, whatever.'

The earth-shaking news no doubt pained Jossip's sweet faced intern, Whitney Little. The Texas transplant recently revealed to us that she's been nursing a ten-year crush on Mr. Bass.

After laughing for about an hour, we asked Ms. Whitney to elaborate on her imaginary love affair with the gay singer, an affair that continued until just last week.

Read Whitney's lovesick ramblings, after the jump.

CONTINUED »

• Jeff Corwin, Anderson Cooper and Dr. Sanjay Gupta looked smart at the Planet In Peril premier.

• Latino parents neglecting gay discussions.

• Wayne Besen on the Closet's construction.

CONTINUED »

Venturing into political opining, Jossip Jewess Debbie Newman took a stab at perpetual hate monger Ann Coulter, who recently called Christians "corrected Jews". Here's what Ms. Newman had to say:

Is Ann Coulter an Anti-Semite? Possibly, but first and foremost, she’s an opportunist. Which is to say, she’s also, at least to a certain degree, a capitalist. So rather than indulging her by buying what she’s selling (in this case, intentionally incendiary remarks about religion) put yourself in her pointy, high heeled shoes for a moment and reconsider this from an economic standpoint. What we have here is a glorified case of supply and demand—so long as Coulter’s critics keep chomping at the bit for a chance to tear her down in the press, she’ll continue to maintain some semblance of relevancy and, worse still, legitimacy.

Ah, the sick, self-serving circle of journalistic punditry.

[Image Source]

• We started the day gossiping about alleged pervo Lou Pearlman. Let's go out with one of his more successful boy bands, 'N Sync. And, yes, we like this song…

• Ask Hillary Clinton about HIV.

• We're contractually obligated to wish our media-obsessed sibling Jossip a happy fourth birthday. Cruise on over and see what they have to say for themselves. Our editor even makes a brief cameo. Also, daddy David can't tell the difference between pink and fuchsia.

CONTINUED »

• Ryan Gosling chatted up guests at Variety Screening Series of Lars and The Real Girl. He's obviously thrilled to play a delusional guy who falls for a doll.

&bull Chicago coppers beat lesbians?

• Mitt Romney does not approve of Democrat candidate's approval of gay approving books.

CONTINUED »

• We can't top today's Doonesbury.

• Maureen "Marcia" McCormick's new book reveals that she and Eve "Jan" Plumb got it behind the Brady Bunch scenes. Said book makes McCormick masturbatory material once again. Poor Plumb remains a plot device.

• AMC's Mad Men getting another go. Said go guarantees more masturbatory Jon Hamm material.

CONTINUED »

We may dig dick, but we find a certain eerie comfort in old women's titties. No doubt, then, we're tickled a pervy shade of pink over Chris Zimmerman's forthcoming "Golden Girls Gone Wild" exhibit.

Our cousin Jossip describes the Frontiers-sponsored Los Angeles show, which features a breast bearing Bea Arthur, thus:

Bea Arthur, like you’ve never seen her before, and never, ever want to see her again.

Obviously they don't know us at all.

Homo Jack E. Jett, meanwhile, sent us an email this morning which read, "My buddy Lenora has purchased some artwork that in my opinion is priceless."

Who knew Bea Arthur and her 85-year old breasts could feed so many contradictions??

• Kentucky's Creation Museum's take on homos leaves something to be desired. Like a new curator. (Although, we do love this graffiti inspired warning.)

• Jossip intern Joseph has a date! But the poor thing has nothing to wear! We voted for white shirt (with minimal pit stainage)". What say you?

• Perez Hilton has at least one testicle.

• Henry Rollins handles gay rumors like a pro, "Never once in my 46 years have I wanted a dick in my mouth."

• Julie (Not Downtown) Brown wants to be gay.

CONTINUED »

Religious fundamentalists think gay people are scary. Well, our cousins over at Jossip led us to TMZ's transcript of OJ Simpson's "coulda-woulda-shoulda" retelling of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman's gruesome murders. And, guess what, it's fucking scary.

Now I was standing in Nicole's courtyard, in the dark, listening to the loud, rhythmic, accelerated beating of my own heart. I put my left hand to my heart and my shirt felt strangely wet. I looked down at myself. For several moments, I couldn't get my mind around what I was seeing. The whole front of me was covered in blood, but it didn't compute. Is this really blood? I wondered. And whose blood is it? Is it mine? Am I hurt?

No, you're crazy, OJ. Seriously, seriously nuts.

Now, can someone please forward this to all our anti-gay enemies and please explain to them that gays may be a lot of things, but we're not insane murderers who wrote a book pretending not to be insane murderers. We're total pussy cats by comparison.

Picking new videos everyday can get a little rough. We know it's hard to image that we run out of ways to satisfy your need for the aural, but we really do.

As always, we welcome your suggestions. No, we may not have the same tastes, it's definitely nice to have a little input.

Earlier this week, Jossip's Debbie Newman offered us a little Warren G/Nate Dogg action. Well, today we asked our other cousin, old stud muffin Cord Jefferson of Mollygood, what he'd like to hear. He suggested British-born actress/singer/offspring of Jane Birkin and Serge Gainsbourg: Charlotte Gainsbourg.

So, here's "The Songs The We Sing" from last year's 5:55. If it rings a bell, it may be the influences of Jarvis Cocker or the boys from Air or Irish songster Neil Hannon: all of them had a hand in the album's creation.

Give it a listen and let us know what you think.

Sorry Afternoon Aural's so late today. We really didn't know what to post and racked our brains until they bled and we still didn't have anything. At a loss, we asked our gossip-mongering cousin Debbie Newman from Jossip what she wanted to hear. She suggested Warren G and Nate Dogg's classic "Regulate".

After having a high school flashback, we agreed. So, here it is. You better fucking enjoy it or else Newman's going to come regulate on your ass - with no Vaseline.

We refuse to utter that horrible "B" word around here. You know, "blogosphere." But we were compelled to list some of the gayest things in the world of blogs from 2005. There were many, but these take the big, pink, wedding cake.

5. Towleroad Does Brokeback. We don’t care if anyone tires of Andy Towle’s Brokeback Mountain coverage. We think it is just the reason why blogs kick butt. He has been meticulous in his coverage and we are certain more than one person in the “real” media has used his site as a resource.

4. Logo Does Blogs. Logo, the MTV gay network, actually made television personalities out of gay bloggers this year. Bloggers on TV? We know, a scary thought. But Andy, Perez, the Malcontent, and even our very own Bradford all snagged a spot. Now if we only knew who had the highest ratings.

3. Jossip Does Queerty. We know we already said we were the Coming Out story of the year, but this is our list and we’ll do what we want with it. Yes, we deserve to be on the So Gay! 2005 list of Blogs because, well, because we say so. The Internet got a little gayer this year. We take full responsibility.

2. Yahoo Does Gawker. Yahoo made it clear that it believes in the importance of blogs when it struck a deal this year with Nick Denton’s Gawker Media. The deal sees Gawker content on Yahoo News. A bit short of the Weblogs Inc./AOL merger, it still makes us smile Cheshire smiles. The thought of Gawker’s content appearing on mainstream news channels is hilarious.

And now the #1 gay blog event of the year after the jump.

CONTINUED »

• Brad Pitt might get more than just a couple of orphaned kids if and when he marries Angelina Jolie. He'll also get a third wheel. [The Sun]

• That gay cowboy movie you'll end up seeing about five or six times before Christmas has just wrangled up a whole bunch of trophies. [Reuters]

• Don't count on that home HIV test being out anytime soon. The last thing a queer needs is getting a false positive at home. [SF Gate]

• Boston College canceled a school-sponsored dance that was to have benefited an AIDS charity citing conflict with church teachings. Next on their list is distribution of chastity belts to the entire student body. [Boston Globe]

• Please join us in giving a big flaming welcome to Jossip's new editor, Corynne Steindler. Don't let the cute innocent smile fool you. We hear she's just as cutthroat as their previous editor. (We keed! We keed! We love her already.) [Jossip]