We knew it was bound to happen: American Idol judge Paula Abdul inspired a woman, Paula Goodspeed, to sit outside Abdul's LA home in a parked car. Perfectly normal, no? Anyway, Goodspeed reportedly committed suicide last night in said vehicle.

And because TMZ thrives under situations that are part devastating, part exploitative, the Web site has already dug up everything about this woman, except her social security number. But don't worry, that's on its way.

Here's what the TMZ stalkers have come up with so far:

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Paula Abdul's come under heavy fire in recent days.

As we all know, the American Idol host kind of screwed up last week when she misspoke and said she had heard both of Jason Castro's songs when, in fact, he had only performed one.

Well, Colin Schoenberger of NewNowNext recently spoke with the entertainer and got to the bottom of how the snafu went down. We would go into the details, but it's complicated and, quite frankly, not as interesting as this:

…People talk about Madonna being the queen of reinvention - and while I applaud her - I don't know anyone who's reinvented themselves more than me, and created monumental, ginormous success in completely different areas of the industry. And that's something nobody's done – not in our generation and not that anyone I've been reading up since I was a little girl. I don't know anyone who started below the line and became - first of all, a cheerleader, and then revolutionizing cheerleading - and then became one of the most world-celebrated choreographers.

Abdul later discusses Idol castoff Danny Noriega, who she says she "fought" for because "this kid is needed – especially Danny- because he is very open about being gay."

Pressing question: is this Paula Abdul's voice? We think not. Regardless of who we're hearing from this pre-taped Super Bowl performance, this track stinks.

• Actress Sharon Stone simply can't wait around for the right man:

[Stone] is sick of men who "act like women" and claims she would rather be romanced by a "masculine" lady.

Sharon - who famously played a bisexual serial killer in 'Basic Instinct' - claimed: "Everybody is bisexual to an extent. Now men act like women and it is difficult to have a relationship because I like men in that old-fashioned way. I like masculinity and, in truth, only women do that now.

The 49-year old also says she likes "lesbian sports," like fishing and golf. She's a full blown dyke!

• Lambda Literary announces award nominees.

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Straight-laced newsman Anderson Cooper gabbed with lesbian entertainer Ellen DeGeneres this morning. We never would have guessed, but CNN's super star can talk trash with the best of 'em. While discussing his reality show addiction, Cooper offered his two cents on MTV's Tiara Girls: "It's like, low-rent beauty pageants. It's like, the Miss Filet of Steak Pageant from Philadelphia." Like, Grrrrl!

The Coop also tells DeGeneres that he's addicted to Paula Abdul's train wreck, Hey, Paula!. He'll be straight-up heartbroken to hear the show got the ax.

American Idol judge Paula Abdul has finally come clean about her pill popping. As we all know (and love!), the former Lakers cheerleader and pop star has become more and more incoherent with each passing season.

Abdul insists to OK!, however, that she's cut back her meds. Huffington Post passes on the gory details:

Abdul does take prescription drugs for pain she still suffers after a 1993 plane crash. "I quit my career. For the next six years, I spent 75% of my time in the hospital. I was also hit by a drunk driver on the freeway after an L.A. Lakers game in 1987, which is when I started getting severe neck pains. I have four titanium plates in my neck. I've had 14 surgeries over the years.

"I inject myself with a shot of Humira every two weeks. … I also use Enbrel and Relafen [an anti-inflammatory drug] and the painkiller Lidocaine. If I appear exhausted on television, it's because I am! I have a lot of sleepless nights because I'm in so much pain. I was taking far more medication on earlier seasons, and nobody said anything."

Well, maybe not to your face, Paula.

Meanwhile Page Six got their sneaky hands on a tape of Abdul crying about her ex-publicist, Howard Bragman, including this, "I don't understand how this man can call me a whining bitch. I've never in my life been called a whining bitch and a loser." There, there, Paula - you're no loser. You are, however, whining, bitch.

• They may not have been able to get fingerprints from the blade that killed porn producer Bryan Charles Kocis, but police are hoping his computer's hard drive and telephone records will lead to his killer. We love a good mystery!

• Rumor has it American Idol's looking to replaced Paula Abdul due to her wacky ways. Why, then, would they ask Courtney Love to take her place? Seriously, someone please explain…

• Also, someone explain John Galliano's fall 2007collection to us, because we don't really understand the whole smeared lip stick, stocking thing. In fact, it sort of makes our heads hurt.

• Wait, the Bush Administration lied about global warming? We feel so…well, yes, deceived, but, honestly, we saw that coming.

• Speaking of government mistakes, The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force and the National Coalition for the Homeless say the government has not done enough to address the "epidemic" of homeless gay youth. (That's because they don't care…)

• In other mistake-related news, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty have apparently grasped the mistake that is drug addiction and have checked into rehab. Together.

• Lily Allen's "debut" album comes out today. As if you don't already have it.

• Paula Abdul claims she got drunk and fell down was assaulted by a man at a "private party" over the weekend. Oh Paula, just because Fox signed you for three more years doesn't mean you can go starting fights. [AP]

• Kids in California won't have to rely on their parents to teach them what "gay" is for much longer if a controversial new bill is passed that would require homosexuality to be addressed in a positive way in school textbooks. So now instead of "James Buchanan the bachelor President," California might teach "James Buchanan the possibly gay President who lived with a man that many called 'Aunt Fancy.'" [Pink News]

• A fraternity at the University of Vermont allegedly engaged in Brokeback Mountain-themed hazing, which is illegal in Vermont (hazing, not cowboys fucking). We hope that photos surface. [WCAX]

• Child molestation between adults and their step-children is totally legal in Connecticut as long as both parties are the same sex. At least for now. [Washington Blade]

• Those intrepid Soulfource Equality Ride members (are there any left that aren't in jail?) are taking their big bus to the Mormons. [Deseret News]

• Paula Abdul Rehab Watch. We hope she never sobers up. [Rotten Ryan]

• Kate Moss' beau pleads guilty–and goes apeshit on a reporter. Hot! [Jossip]

• Gay icon Gina Gershon divas out over a pair of shoes, solidifies gay icon status juuuust a little more. [Daily Dish] via [Socialite Life]

• The real reason we watch Footballer's Wives. [PAYOR]

• Soap operas filling up with bubbly gay teens. [AfterElton]

• Brokeback Mountain (yes, we're sick of talking about it too, but this is actually legit) has inspired new anti-discrimination laws in Taiwan. Cool. [Taipei Kid]

• Chief Justice Roberts or Justice Souter: who is more gay? [Wonkette]

• Why Paula Abdul is the most important Idol judge. [MSNBC]

• Scientology may have been the "cure" for Tom Cruise's gayness, but now it's blamed for a woman's death. Or maybe, the woman was just nuts?…[The Scoop]

• Madonna, the Kabbalah, and chicken soup. Read to the end for the link to the story. [PAYOR]

• Faye Dunaway leaving the message of all messages. Listen all the way through, bask in the momentum. It's ironic that she complains about wanting to leave Mommie Dearest behind, yet she just soooo brought her back to life. [WOW]

During an interview on Howard Stern's Sirius radio program, Simon Colwell predicted the three finalists for this season of American Idol:

"Let me tell you who's gonna be in the finals," Cowell said. "The bald-headed kid (Chris Daughtry) and the guy with gray hair (Taylor Hicks)."

A few minutes later, he added, "I think the top three will be the two I mentioned and Kellie Pickler."

While Simon is trying to portray himself as the all-knowing soothsayer of music competitions, we presume he can read the weekly reports on how many votes are cast for each contestant. So he would know who has been in the lead so far. It's not that fancy a prediction.

Although when we TiVo Idol, we do fast-forward through comments by "Uhhhhhh, it was alright for me" Randy Jackson and "Your light shines from within" Paula Abdul, and only watch Simon's snappy critiques–unless Paula is drunk/high, in which case we watch her comments over and over. Cracked-out Paula is the best. But Simon's opinions aren't inherently any more accurate than the other judges: remember, in the preliminary audition stages, he gave "no" votes to both Chris Daughtry and Taylor Hicks. Suddenly, he's changing his tune?…

Simon picks Idol finalists

This season of American Idol is amazing, but not because of the singers. The singers are good though they’d better watch out because Abdul is slowly stealing their spotlight. We’re convinced that Abdul is back to popping the pills. Either she had a Botox session go amazingly wrong or the girl has had a few recent visits from the pill fairy. We went crazy with our Tivo on Tuesday looping back and forward watching Abdul’s drug induced responses. Abdul continuously referred to the singers’ performances as “out of this world.” Secretly, we think she was referring to her state of consciousness, or lack thereof. The combination of the fidgety turret syndrome-like head movements, coupled with the bad drag queen hair and the scary pill-popping smile made it perfectly clear.

Pill popping Abdul aside, we still have to predict who will win this season. Don’t hate us for doing this, but we’re predicting Katherine McPhee will take it all. She’s cute, girl can sang and after dropping the Streisand, I’m sure she has the gays on her side. We also like her because Abdul loves her and her pill poppy behavior really shows itself when McPhee is on stage. Simon put it best:

McPhee, the final contestant to take the stage, earned Cowell's highest praise of the night, with her performance of Barbra Streisand's "Since I Fell for You. "There were four very, very good vocalists tonight," Cowell said. "And you were the best."

Our predictions aside, somebody stage an intervention with Abdul, but not until the season is over.

Ladies First on "American Idol [E! Online]
American Idol [Official Site]

• A Paula Abdul dating show sounds like the perfect televised train wreck we've been waiting for. If there is a God, her dating pool will be filled exclusively with American Idol rejects. [Zap2it]

• The DGA hearts Ang Lee. We'll soon find out how much the Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sceinces loves Lee and Brobeback. Oscar noms are out tomorrow. [BBC]

• China does not heart Brokeback Mountain. [BBC]

• A gay Colombian man, currently in Orlando, wants the U.S. to grant him political asylum because of increased homophobia in his native country. But is landing yourself in a state run by George Bush's bro really a step in the right direction? [Miami Herald]

• Guy Ritchie will be best man at Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's wedding. We would be super-happy fags if Madonna somehow ends up godmother to the most beautiful baby in the world. [Digital Spy]

• American Idol might not be so good this season. Paula Abdul seems to be off the meds. [Dot Conor]

• Dan Renzi’s hilarious “brother” is back with another Project Runway recap. [Dan Renzi]

• And you can’t have Dan without having Rich. He’s famous for these posts. [Four Four]

• Gay weddings in Baltimore? Might be sooner than you think. [The Advocate]

• “Q: What’s better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? A: Not being retarded.” We just spit up our coffee. [The FAGAT Guide]