Here’s a precious moment we can all relate to: you’re at a party with Hollywood types when two gay mimes show up. Typical Tuesday night, until one of them rubs his boner on you.
Unfortunately no amount of witchcraft could protect AHS: Coven actress Gabourey Sidibe from the above scenario. And I’m sorry, I don’t care if it’s Zac Efron behind that makeup, there is just nothing sexy about a mime.
And really, if he was worth his weight in black berets wouldn’t he have just given the illusion of a boner rub? And why in God’s name was he sporting wood in the first place? The people need answers.
Marcel Marceau is rolling over in his invisible box grave.
How about we take this to the next level?
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Here’s the tweet from Sidibe:
“I knew it was time to leave the party when that mime asked me for a picture and then rubbed his boner on me” – Me #foreverUnclean
And it looks like there was some potential retaliation judging by this:
@GabbySidibe we should have pushed him in the pool when we had the chance #mimesbeshady
On a positive note, #mimesbeshady might be our new favorite hashtag.
RomanHans
Okay, dude, if your only justification for calling the mimes “gay” is because you think BEING a mime is “gay,” you should not be a journalist.
Jeremy Kinser
@RomanHans:
If you click on the hyperlink you’ll see that it was indeed a pair of mimes who identify as gay.
Tracy Pope
@RomanHans: The article in the link refers to the gay couple who were the mimes at the party. Unless a gay mime can get a boner rubbing against a woman I think Miss Sidibe might be over-reacting. Her tweet makes for good(?) media fodder.
Spike
If I hadn’t had a boner rub up against you me in the last 5 years, I would react the same way. Please the last guy that had sex with her had to roll her in flour in order to find the wet spot.
B Damion
@Jeremy Kinser… Ummm…if you don’t mind. We would like the freedom of talking about you behind your back without you chiming in to defend yourself please.
geezzz…so rude!
rextrek
I thought ms Sidibe was going to play as the lead in the Haddie McDaniel story?
dbmcvey
Wait, how did we know the mime was gay?
DarkZephyr
@dbmcvey: As Jeremy Kinser pointed out, their is a hyper link within the article that shows that the mimes were a gay couple. Its the very first one. See where “rubs his boner on you” is an apricot or dark orange sort of color rather than black like the rest of the text? You click on that and it shows you a small blurb written by the guy who recommended the Mimes. He also indicates that she was overreacting. There was no boner, but at least she gets to be clever on Twitter. *rolling eyes* I am finding myself having less and less respect for her as time goes on. First that faux pas about transgendered people and now this. You don’t treat your fans this way.
jwrappaport
There is precious little of interest here.
RomanHans
@Jeremy Kinser: Thanks for clearing that up, and sorry for jumping to conclusions. I tried to think of a rational explanation but “Hi! My boyfriend and I will be your gay mimes for the evening!” didn’t seem realistic.
MusicEsMiVida
@Spike: And if you weren’t such a superficial asshole, maybe people would actually like you. But, I guess you are what you eat.
Spike
@MusicEsMiVida: You actually think that I come to Queerty to be liked. Now THAT is funny.
hotshot70
No, you a all wrong. The mimes mistook her for a mattress, attempeted to lay down for a nap and got stuck in her fat folds…
ED49
To all the queens who like to cry, watch her movie “Precious ” that’s a serious disfuncional movie . I had never experienced so much sadness and reality in a movie.
queeryguy89
Gurl dat mime has a boner. There’s a meme going:
https://imgflip.com/i/78a1z
queeryguy89
ED49
@hotshot70: you are a stupid person, im sure you look stupid,probably you are wearing something stupid, you already wrote something stupid.
Why queens discriminate others for physical appearance? and yet, they can not take it when someone does it to them?
tazz602
I hope she never rides the subways in NYC if that’s how she feels about that.
Fitz
If you are in the same room with her, some part of you is bound to rub up against her.
Stache1
@Spike: All we know at this point is that the mime is a chubby chaser.
NoelG
@Spike: What’s not funny is you re-treading an elementary school joke.