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fear factor

The A-List: Dallas Recap: “I Am So Scared Right Now.”

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The fourth installment of Logo’s The A-List Dallas quieted down after the fireworks of the last couple of episodes. Once again, the real drama took place off-screen as sharp-eyed gossip hounds believed they found castmaste Levi Crocker’s fabled package on Grindr.

The main storyline this week centered on a forthcoming launch party for Inch Wear, Levi’s underwear line. Our burgeoning entrepreneur ambles through one scene after another with party planners, prospective models and stylists—who appear to grow on trees in Dallas—and reflexively hits on everyone. A castwide argument towards the end of this episode centers on professionalism (more on that later) but on this specific point, Levi is clueless.

He openly leers at the male models he’s supposed to be hiring to display his scanties and doesn’t seem to notice when they grin uneasily. And nobody calls him on it. Oh, Levi.

Taylor the Terrible’s reign of villainy takes a back seat this episode as Chase—he of the hairy man-cleavage (“I’m in a cub phase”), shellacked follicles and quippy one-liners—ostensibly plots revenge for Taylor having accidentally-on-purpose knocked Levi and Phillip into the pool during his own party. But as the episode unfolds Chase reveals another motive: he wants Levi for himself in order to punish Taylor. This will quickly become clear to everybody watching but inevitably flies right over Levi’s head.

If you’re counting, that’s a third castmate dicktimized by our sex-obsessed cowboy/underwear mogul.

NEXT: James really needs to buy a clue

 

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By:           JC ADAMS
On:           Nov 1, 2011
Tagged: , , , , ,
  • 22 Comments
    • Lucifer Arnold
      Lucifer Arnold

      Scared for what?? I like what I saw.

      Nov 1, 2011 at 2:57 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • spider_orchid
      spider_orchid

      I don’t know if the writer has changed for these AList round ups or what, but I enjoyed this one a lot. I’ve decided to just calm the fuck down and enjoy this for what it is: Empty Television Carbs. Good in moderation and necessary when you’re feeling down. Also, Levi is not cute enough for all these dudes to want to fuck him.

      Nov 1, 2011 at 3:16 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • CBRad
      CBRad

      I still think the writers will make one of the characters confess to throwing the rock through the winshield, or the “victim” will admit doing it himself. Something like that. Unless they write a murder into the show.

      Nov 1, 2011 at 3:19 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Ray
      Ray

      Yes, apparently there is at least one store in Dallas, I think on the main gay drag, that encourages you to try on the underwear from what I’ve heard. I have not been there. I will not be going there. I do not know if they charge extra for the skid marks.

      Nov 1, 2011 at 3:50 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Marie Cohn
      Marie Cohn

      These empty-headed young’uns didn’t realize that one of the stylists-producers is a big ol’ Dietrich “Hot Voodoo” fan and plagiarized the gorilla suit strip act from an ancient movie.

      Nov 1, 2011 at 5:18 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Cam
      Cam

      This show hasn’t been cancelled yet??

      Nov 1, 2011 at 5:19 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • timncguy
      timncguy

      In Ashley’s defense on her photo ability…. when Levi asked her to take the photos, she did suggest doing them in a studio where she could control the lighting. And, she also was hampered on the outdoor shoot because Levi kept demanding that she shoot pics where he wanted them shot instead of where she suggested for optimum lighting.

      Nov 1, 2011 at 7:33 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • timncguy
      timncguy

      Please promise me that the odd blonde plastic faced thing with the weird surgically enhanced lips identified as “James’ friend” will not be making any future appearances. It scares me.

      Nov 1, 2011 at 7:37 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Amber024
      Amber024

      How can Chase be proud of himself?? He always has this disgusting smirk on his face, like he’s sticking it to Taylor. At the end of the day, Chase, you have Taylor’s sloppy seconds!! You’re kissing a guy who had Taylors d*ck in his mouth a week before. This week’s episode really showed how pathetic crooked-nose Levi and elf-eared Chase really are. #TeamTaylor!!!

      Nov 1, 2011 at 10:05 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Fitz
      Fitz

      Every time you watch an episode of this show, you loose another 1/2 inch of dick.

      Nov 1, 2011 at 10:23 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • shannon
      shannon

      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~LEVI IS DISGUSTING~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

      Nov 2, 2011 at 12:42 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jake
      Jake

      Taylor is getting everything he deserves. He’s the queen of talking out of both sides of his mouth and makes himself look like a two-faced immature idiot. He says he wants to be exclusive with Levi and then turns right around he tells the camera that Levi is not that bright and is easily manipulated. It doesn’t matter if it’s true or not, you don’t talk that way behind your boyfriends back. Well Taylor, not so hot now at ya! You thought you were the bitch when the real bitch was actually karma.

      And James, I’m sincerely concerned for your mental health! You ARE a nice looking guy, stop saying you’re not and work on your self-esteem. You have a self-calibration problem, big time. Dial it back a bit and your dates won’t go running and you’ll eventually find a nice guy. Just calm down and be patient and not so spastic. You’re scaring guys away with this behavior.

      Nov 2, 2011 at 3:05 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • divkid
      divkid

      it’s just a shame the show doesn’t foreground more of dallas itself ;
      i’d love to see the cast shot by a grassy knoll, or book depository.

      otherwise can’t fault the show. it’s rightly attained its position at the very apex of high culture.

      Nov 2, 2011 at 9:58 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jason
      Jason

      I’d like to see them all being forced into a life of indentured servitude by really mean butch dykes.

      Nov 2, 2011 at 6:25 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Glenn
      Glenn

      This nut house pathology of a show is horrifying in its ability to fascinate

      Nov 2, 2011 at 11:20 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • J
      J

      These people are just actors. I actually know the real “Levi Crocker”. Even his last name was taken by producers off of Chris Crocker, the gay youtube celebrity. People are so dumb if they believe this show is real.

      Nov 3, 2011 at 2:08 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • J
      J

      These people are just actors. I actually know the real “Levi Crocker”. Even his last name was taken by producers off of Chris Crocker, the gay youtube celebrity. People are so dumb if they believe this show or any “REALITY” show is truthful or real. Do you think any of these people are using their “real names”. Ha.

      Nov 3, 2011 at 2:09 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • J is for Jabroni
      J is for Jabroni

      Oh “J”‘
      Sure honey, you know the REAL Levi. You’re as delusional as James is in thinking he and Levi had a relationship when in reality they just tricked once, and James was horrible according to Levi. Perhaps some portions of the show are scripted but these people are not actors. If they are, I would be demanding a refund from the acting schools they attended.

      Let me guess, you tricked with Levi too and you’re bitter that he won’t return your phone calls. How do you explain Levi’s DUI mugshot if that’s not his real name.

      http://www.bustedmugshots.com/texas/dallas/levi-crocker/3417372

      Nov 3, 2011 at 3:17 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • REAS
      REAS

      I don’t see the attraction in ANY of the cast members. They are supposed to be somewhere in their twenties but act like they are about 12. I know the cast is scripted, but it’s like watching a train wreck. You have to stare, avert your eyes and then look back again to be sure of what you are seeing. I think most “reality” stars sell themselves very cheaply. But these guy better better be getting a little ‘extra’ in their paycheck. They will need it.

      Nov 3, 2011 at 6:59 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • william ocariz
      william ocariz

      I am so disgusted with this show. It is full of queer little sissy southern girls that give your city the worst possible name
      except for Levi, I would fire each and every one of them and get some real representation of what a southern man really
      is. The first to go is that butterfly Phillip who turns my stomach every time he comes on. Then that girl Taylor and finally
      Shane, a girl with hair on his chest. The butchest person on this show is Ashley. I will never visit Dallas if this is what I
      should expect to see. Did you cast on money? Me & my friends have more money than all of you put together and you
      would never see such flamboyant queerness, ever. You give gay ;people a bad name and this show should be removed
      immediately from the airways. Poor Dallas, they are probably dying of embarrassment. Have the show revolve around Levi and get rid of everyone else, they I’ll watch, otherwise count on me switching the channel. if you could get James to stop waving his hands around you could probably keep him. Ty his hands together and stop with the broken wrist look
      It’s ridiculous seeing such a big guy with such loose wrist. Come on, be a man, drink all you want but be a fucken man.
      Levi, you disgust me when you lay down with these faggots. Is there not real man in all of Dallas? Sad.

      Nov 3, 2011 at 4:03 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • FarleyNY
      FarleyNY

      @Marie Cohn: How very correct.

      Nov 5, 2011 at 2:23 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • FarleyNY
      FarleyNY

      @divkid: <3

      Nov 5, 2011 at 2:28 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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