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Nyasha's Nectar

The A-List: New York Recap: “She’s A Business Too”

Lots of revelations among the List-ers this week—some of them Cinnabon-ishly sweet; some like newly-peeled layers of sunburned skin. And some are just straight-up lies told to a camera.

Counting down…

10. Austin is so skilled in the ways of consuming alcohol that he no longer needs anything but his forearm to open a bottle, presumably even one that isn’t twist-off. Also in this inspirational bottle-opening scene, he’s shirtless and shows just enough moob to make thousands of haters feel justified in extending the ongoing falsehood that he’s fat.

9. Kathy Griffin shows up. This being a gay show, that’s not a revelation. The shocker is how little of the episode they choose to devote to her. Nyasha talking about Nyasha while sitting behind her desk in the walk-in-closet-sized office of her wig empire, however, takes about 23 minutes of airtime.

8. Nyasha has an assistant named Asif (a-SEEF, not AS IF). He creates bow-tie -like ornaments out of gift ribbon and decorates his neck with them. It’s kind of awesome, actually—the kind of style move that takes a lot of effort and practice. Don’t judge him for not devoting more time to local orphans or whatever. Everybody has their part to play in this life.

7. Austin and Jake plan to renew their wedding vows after being together for one year. This is, apparently, an actual thing that people do. It’s on the Internet.

6. Nyasha spends her non-desk minutes of the episode talking about her lady business and its need for male intimacy.

Sample quotes:

“My vag needs it.”

“She’s a business, too.” (referring to the aforementioned vag)

“I masturbate to your pictures.” (Said to bisexual Rodiney, who would now like to take it all back.)

5. Austin can gossip-text with his phone while having his teeth laser-whitened… as he opens a bottle of booze with his forearm.

4. Jake voices concern that Austin cannot stop flirting with Reichen. Austin thinks that Jake—the love of his life, the man with whom he’s planning to renew his vows— is a “stupid English prig.” To prove that he’s not just saying this to be petty, hurtful and stupid himself, Austin repeats “stupid” a second time in the space of 30 seconds. Place your bets now on whether or not the word will appear in his vows.

3. A drink is named after Nyasha. It’s called “Nyasha’s Nectar.” You do not want to know more about this.

2. Nyasha throws a launch party for Nyasha’s wig business that’s already a few years old. Curious, but not so surprising for a show that needs to manufacture plots involving fencing matches and nightclub events devoted to gigantic mock-up cans of spray-on tan. At the launch, there’s a step-and-repeat mobbed by three or four photographers. It appears that Nyasha alone is to be photographed in front of it, as nobody else is waiting their turn. Again, not a big thing for a show that has to make sure the viewing public understands that these people are celebrities, no matter how uncelebrated they are. The revelation here, then, is that T.J. arrives wearing a giant bow on his head made out of fake hair—and it looks absolutely correct on him. He also probably wore it around town the next day.

1. Grindr is pronounced GREEN-dur. Thanks, Rodiney.

By:           Dave White
On:           Aug 30, 2011
Tagged: , , , , ,
  • 29 Comments
    • slanty
      slanty

      Someone please remind me why there’s vag talk on a gay show.

      Aug 30, 2011 at 4:50 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jonathan
      Jonathan

      Nyahsa is an odious villain and sadly Austin is truly a cruel drunk as evidenced by his shameful behavior in front of his husband. He’s not ready to be anyone’s husband and as long as he drinks, alcohol is the third member of his and Jake’s relationship.

      Aug 30, 2011 at 4:56 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Will
      Will

      Does anyone really care anymore about this piece of shit. The best thing we could all do is to turn it off and teach LOGO a lesson.

      Aug 30, 2011 at 5:58 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Garrett
      Garrett

      Was a decent guilty pleasure, until nyasha showed up. Now I’ve just stopped caring. LOGO somehow hits a new low.

      Aug 30, 2011 at 6:11 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • timncguy
      timncguy

      You can surely tell how irrelevant this show is by the fact that these recap posts, which were much funnier last year, can’t even manage more than a handful of comments this year.

      Aug 30, 2011 at 7:33 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Dev
      Dev

      I’ve had more people in my bathroom than were at that “launch party.”

      Aug 30, 2011 at 7:38 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • JR
      JR

      While I’m not particularly fond of a few of the cast members, non are as annoying as Nyasha. She is extremelycrass, egocentric, and feels her time is more valuable than everyone else.

      She apparently isn’t that “popular” because if you look closely many of the tables were empty at her party, hardly anyone was thete. You can’t say that it was early because Nyasha was allegedly late.

      This girl can throw digs and dish out snide remarks, but god forbid anyone try to say anything back to the Queen. Along with a few members of the cast she has big inferiority issues. Note to Nyasha putting others down doesn’t make you better, and it doesn’t make you refined. You just look like classless trash.

      Yeah this is a mini rant about her, but what bothers me the most is how she seems to elevate herself above her cast members. Again I don’t think any of them are saints, but it is a gay show. Personally I feel this girl thinks that she’s the know it all “straight” woman and these “gay” guys are her followers. We’ve come a long way since those times and sorry straight is not better than gay. Were all the same.

      Do a cast shake up, but definitely get rid of this woman.

      Aug 30, 2011 at 8:18 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • timncguy
      timncguy

      @Dev: the funniest part was that they felt like the “launch party” was such a success that it required an “after party”. LOLOLOLOLOLOL

      Aug 30, 2011 at 8:31 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Zee
      Zee

      Ugh…I can’t even watch this show for a minute without feeling sick.

      Aug 30, 2011 at 8:35 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Rich
      Rich

      from some angles Nyasha looks like a really badly done drag queen. her extreme self-involvement makes all of the guys somehow less unlikeable. She seems well on her way to having blowouts with each of them. Having one with Rodiney over his silly sunglasses suggests that they had trouble coming up with a “plot” for this episode, along with all the screen time they gave her. Austin seems destined to cry in every episode. Mike seems destined to always choose an unflattering look. His lookalike bf’s crying jag seemed calculated to remind us that Mike is the only one with a shred of empathy even if he devotes himself to ridiculous pursuits.

      Aug 30, 2011 at 9:46 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • timncguy
      timncguy

      Characters from other reality shows tend to keep showing up on A-List. Nyasha was from another show. I think she appeared on Toddlers and Tiaras as a judge. And, I could swear that the “model” she rejected from her interviews this week for making the others feel uncomfortable had been on Millionaire Matchmaker last year as a millionairess looking for love.

      Aug 30, 2011 at 10:00 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • dave
      dave

      timncguy, you are correct. That dancer who looked about 50 years old and was running late to another audition was Stacy who was rejected twice on Millionaire Matchmaker, once (the first time) because she was so flaky she wouldn’t stop controlling everything on the date and the second time because she started the date by showing the guy her own promo video for modeling or something. She’s one of Patti Stanger’s favorite losers.

      I agree, the show last night was horrible. So much Nyasha. I might skip the rest of the episodes and just wait for the reunion, hoping Nyasha won’t make it. She does look like a drag queen, only without the sense of humor.

      Aug 30, 2011 at 10:40 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • mikeandrewsdantescove
      mikeandrewsdantescove

      I have to say Rodiney has been off his game this entire season. It’s hard to buy that he’s bisexual.

      Austin is a trainwreck and has Reichen as his only friend. They might as well sleep together.

      Nyasha is serving it.

      Mike Andrews
      Alist –
      http://itunes.apple.com/us/album/alist-single/id439889457

      Aug 30, 2011 at 11:10 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • lynn jones
      lynn jones

      I didn’t see this recap before leaving my comments about Ny at her earlier introduction. I would like to add that it looks like she used her dour faced asian assistant as one of her hair models. Can’t say if it was perky or jerky or whatever the themes were. Notice none were black though? She always acts better than everyone involved which has already gotten old. I wish someone would throw up in her face about her tenure as the toddler judge and how she was so qualifed for that position.

      No one was really at that hair show event. She was late and no one was clamoring for her autograph or photograph. Don’t you love her half turn with the hand under the lips, pursed at someone next to the camera?

      The boys want to involve her though I see some are seeing her true colors. She isn’t a business, I don’t care if she is singing or brushing some poorly designed wig. She loves to product place and name drop but I have to wonder if that Michael, the gay emcee from Toddlers and Tiaras felt slighted at the air time he ended up with?

      And what’s with those strange words she uses, like after everyone taking a drink after an all-around “cheers”? I can’t remember them but something like “shawong” for example. . .

      Aug 31, 2011 at 12:48 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • pithyscreenname
      pithyscreenname

      The one good thing with the Nyasha crap. I always fast forward through her- which means I was able to watch this episode in about ten minutes.

      Austin, with his drinking problem and all, still seems like the only “real” one of this crowd.

      Aug 31, 2011 at 8:54 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Tony
      Tony

      why is there a straight woman featured on a show that’s supposed to be about gay men in NYC? Feels like a bait and switch. The show sucks.

      Aug 31, 2011 at 10:29 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Yellow Belly
      Yellow Belly

      @slanty: It’s meant to appease the straight males who watch a show… full of gay males. Maybe?

      Aug 31, 2011 at 11:05 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • pseudoamericana
      pseudoamericana

      one really needs to stop taking this show so seriously and just enjoy the voyeuristic pleasure of watching people, who take themselves so seriously, make fools of themselves on television.

      Aug 31, 2011 at 12:15 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Viktor
      Viktor

      @pseudoamericana: I was thinking the same thing… lol X)

      Aug 31, 2011 at 2:42 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • mattsy
      mattsy

      Nyasha is as gay as the guys. I love her! And lets not forget that she brought back Michael Galanes, the host who sang creepy songs to the contestants on Little Miss Perfect!!! Brillballs!!!

      Aug 31, 2011 at 5:01 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Cam
      Cam

      It’s obvious that Logo was afraid that the show was too “Gay”. Otherwise why is Nyasha on the show unless she is sleeping with one of the producers?

      Additionally, her calling in that one wannabee model who was complaining that the casting was running too long was the action of a nobody. An A lister wouldn’t bother to even see that person. However Nyasha found it necessary to call that model in and go off on her. Obviously her time isn’t valuable.

      As for Rodiney’s bisexuality, if he’s going to fake it he should try not to look scared every time a woman talks to him. A REAL bisexual would be turned on or flirting with women, not looking like they just got called into the principal’s office.

      And lastly, one last time. Nyasha being on the show, is borderline offensive. I guess it would have been to “Edgy” to have a gay MAN who was black.

      Aug 31, 2011 at 5:09 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Danny
      Danny

      Nyasha is a total bitch just like the queens on this show.I like her,but if they wanted to include some color why not a black gay man?

      Aug 31, 2011 at 5:11 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Tony
      Tony

      Excellent point….they should have put on a black man….cowards

      Aug 31, 2011 at 6:08 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Andreas
      Andreas

      Nyasia is right about one thing — Austin needs professional help. I think he’s bipolar based on his behavior, sober and drunk. The best thing for him would be to leave the cameras behind while he works on stabilizing his mood swings. Otherwise I won’t be surprised to read several years from now that he’s dead, no suspicious circumstances.

      Sep 4, 2011 at 10:40 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • susan
      susan

      Get rid of Nyasha. She is a real jerk

      Sep 8, 2011 at 2:03 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • drumstick
      drumstick

      All I can think of is the poor English husband of Austin. To be caught up in the middle of this drama. I thought the English had more class.

      Sep 13, 2011 at 7:45 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Desy
      Desy

      GET RID OF THAT THING WHO CALLS ITSELF NYASHA.
      I AM A STRAIGHT FEMALE IN SAN FRANCISCO. GAY MEN ARE TERRIFIC FRIENDS, TALENTED, WITTY, WELL GROOMED.
      WHY DID LOGO PUT A LOW-CLASS PIECE OF DIRT LIKE NYASHA ON THIS FUN SERIES.
      SHE MAKES ME WANT TO VOMIT. SHE IS RUINING THIS SHOW. I HAVE CONSIDERED NOT WATCHING ANYMORE. GET NYASHA OFF THIS SERIES. I WANT TO TYPE THIS 100 TIMES.
      G E T T H A T “FEMALE” O F F T H E S E R I E S. THAT LOSER IS HAS MORE MALE DNA THAN A REAL MAN. WHAT A FAKE, MANLY, UNTALENTED, LOSER!!!!!

      Sep 14, 2011 at 12:14 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Desy
      Desy

      Just read some of the previous posts. I forgot to add this to my previous post.
      Nyasha really does look like a mean, bitchy type of drag queen. Can’t imagine any man would want to deal with that fake female. No pussy is better than that creepy things taint. YUCK!!!!!!

      Sep 14, 2011 at 12:20 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Michelle
      Michelle

      Hello Boys ! This is not a “gay” show. I’m a straight dominican girl and I watch the show and love it!
      I actually walked into the fashion show episode and saw them walk. I was there to shop but what evs. Now Nyasha is just plain embarrassing. She messed up her walk but they edited that out btw lol. I dont care for this girl. I wear Christian Louboutins and if someone says they like my shoes I simply say thank you. This girl feels compelled to name drop everything! It really is tacky. P.S. wearing Mara Hoffman and rocking Louboutin and a Louis Vuitton bag dosn’t make you this elite chi chi diva NYasha!. I have all of these things as well as many NYC girls do. We all work hard too. Why brag about this and that. Makes you look like such a tool. If you have style you just do without saying a word. Saying how successful you are and how you get hit on all the time Yet there is no mans in sight is pathetic. The guys tend to kiss her butt. She seems so fake. Wonder what she looks like without the wig and make up. She needs to get real.
      I just think her attitude is awful and she is single for that reason. Ryan and TJ are my faves. They are too cute. They crack me up. Austin needs rehab and a shrink. I mean does he ever think anything he dosnt say? Geez man learn to edit!

      Oct 13, 2011 at 6:32 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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