Lez be honest, chances are you didn’t watch last night’s MTV Video Music Awards. And really, you didn’t miss much. We don’t predict too much VMA chatter today at the proverbial water cooler.
But the night wasn’t completely devoid of notable moments.
So without further ado, here’s the good, the bad and the ugly from the 2014 VMAs.
Sam Smith crooned his way into our hearts, yet again:
Laverne Cox showed up looking like an interstellar space queen:
And if Laverne was a space queen, Amber Rose was a sexy metal plated stripper from Saturn’s third ring:
Beyonce killed it by closing the show with a 16-minute medley of her latest album:
And Blue was digging what Mommy was serving:
OK, now The Bad:
Nicki Minaj opened up the night with a wardrobe malfunction during her performance of “Anaconda.” Normally this would make the “good” list by sheer virtue of being exciting, except that it was the most boring near-nude experience you could imagine:
Jim Carrey did full Jim Carrey shtick as he pranced around the stage showing what he’d do with his scarf if he were at Burning Man. This would be unfunny enough on its own, but then he had to go and fall down.
When Kim Kardashian’s breasts found out they weren’t eligible to win any awards, they hit the champagne hard and wouldn’t shut up about how overrated Bey is:
Brace yourself, here’s The Ugly:
Speaking of Kim and her cloney clan — during a tribute to the conflicts in Ferguson, Mo. and a moment of silence for Mike Brown, the camera cut to Kim, Kylie and Kendall to discover all three with phones out and fingers tapping away. Perhaps they were just Googling what Ferguson is in the first place:
The awkward rotten banana peel half-dress is one thing, but the “#hashtag” clutch is actual proof that humanity’s end is nearer than we thought:
They say imitation is the highest form of flattery. But when one talentless pop star (Katy Perry) imitates an even more talentless pop star (Britney Spears), nobody should feel flattered. Here is Katy and Riff Raff imitating Britney and Justin’s denim look. Oh, the humanity:
Special Runner Up:
Ok, so this may have happened at VMA benefit preshow, but this clip of Iggy Azalea falling off the stage might be our favorite moment of this entire post: