DICK SLIP

The Nine Greatest Semi-NSFW News Bloopers

There are not nearly enough dicks on TV these days, if you ask us. But luckily for everyone, a few rogue peens manage to make it on the air every year by way of Freudian slip or control room mishap.

Here are our nine favorite dick-related, partially NSFW news bloopers:

ABC12 reporter Sibohan Riley encouraged drivers in Saginaw, Michigan to steer clear of North Michigan Avenue last July due to a giant cock blocking traffic in both lanes. It’s clear the giant penis she drew on her interactive traffic map was probably unintentional, but we’re going to file this under ‘Freudian slip.’

In what is probably the most priceless newscaster reaction shot of all time, startled KIRO 7 reporter Dawn Scott looks square into the camera and says “oh my goodness” after a near collision with an unabashed streaker that hijacked her segment about a college student who threatened to blow up the Puget Sound. Daytime Emmy for this performance right here.

A developing story out of the CNN newsroom last July confirmed that man had hunted all dildos to extinction. “Black dildos, white dildos, spotted dildos, curved dildos and exotic dildos are all gone,” we first reported. “There are no more.”

This news obviously (and thankfully) turned out to be false. We’ve purchased plenty new playthings since July.

http://youtu.be/zYfiZ2p9Aa4

Some super-hot bros managed to get some airtime during 2011’s Hurricane Irene coverage on The Weather Channel. As field reporter Eric Fisher talks about the dangerous conditions outside, one of the bros bares all and streaks across the right side of the screen. Bless.

In a 2006 Fox News piece addressing Iran’s growing influence in Lebanon, anchor Jane Skinner reports that six Afghan police officers were killed in an ambush, including the district’s top cock…. er, top cockumtop cock. Cop.

With that many top cocks on the scene, it’s a wonder he was only sprayed with bullets.

A rather excitable Seahawks fan ran through the streets sans pants after his team won the 2014 Super Bowl, and managed to have his junk broadcast on live television immediately, and the Internet for all eternity.

http://youtu.be/iuD2gDaimtQ

Last month, a Fox affiliate out of Denver aired a photo of a beautiful, flaccid penis during a segment covering a helicopter crash in Seattle. Three out of the four news anchors on screen react as if a grenade was thrown on set, while one unfazed reporter casually continues the conversation.

The sex-shaming station later apologized for airing what they believe was an “offensive” photo.

Global Saskatoon anchor Lisa Dutton, widely known for giving an inadvertent blowjob demonstration live on air, caught the Internet’s attention with another Freudian slip during a segment about a literal sausage fest. Visit “pick-a-dick dot com,” she says.

The whole situation really isn’t helped by her co-anchor, who immediately jumps to her defense with “well, you’re thinking about sausage, so…” Nice save. Not.

Behold, the unidentified reporter who will be forever known as “ass cream girl” after reporting that one of El Paso’s most wanted “ass cream vendors” was finally behind bars. Not exactly a dick-related blooper, but not a far stretch either…

Allegedly gay Fox News anchor Shep Smith has cock on the mind in his second appearance on our short list — he reported in 2007 that “Bratton reportedly says he’d want to be London’s cop top. [Pause] Top cock.” Ugh! “Top cop.”

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