viewing habits

What Kind of Porn Would Megan Phelps Watch If God Didn’t Hate Her For It?

Oh, hey Westboring Baptist! Barely saw you there this weekend in Long Beach, given your little crowd was over taken by some counter-demonstrators. But there you were, holding up those gauche signs. Somebody really needs to teach you guys a few things about primary colors, you know? (But that recent shot of you folks in front of Rick Warren’s Saddleback Church? Cuuuute!) Up till now, we’ve been willing to give you a passing mention because, hey, you folks are ridiculous, and our readers love clowns. But now that little 24-year-old Megan Phelps-Roper, granddaughter of your group’s found Fred Phelps, is becoming a Twitter starlet, well, we’re falling into our “slave to celebrity” rabbit hole, and we cannot avert our eyes.

Especially when she keeps speaking to homosexual media. First she acknowledges there’s nothing she can do about the inevitable arrival of gay marriage, and now she’s talking about pornography.

So which are you a bigger fan of, Megs, gay or straight erotica? “Neither. Both are totally depraved and no way to live – and that’s true even if you don’t bring God into it!,” she says. “The porn industry and the fact that it thrives is just evidence that this proud, rebellious generation has no respect for themselves or for the standards of God. [… Gay-for-pay porn stars are] committing whoredom and teaching rebellion. They’re wrong to do so! But you knew that already — just like they do.”

What it must feel like to be bursting with such knowledge.

And while Westboro has made a habit of protesting military funerals (because God Hates America, ‘member?), this might be the first request that Megan has received (and accepted?). It’s from Mannix Vanderzee, and should he return from Iraq in a casket, he wants Megan and her cohorts to be there at his burial.

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