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White Collar‘s Matt Bomer Is a Proud Out Gay Man Who Doesn’t ‘Care’ About the Rumors He’s a Gay

bomerhallsC

We’ve learned one thing about White Collar‘s Matt Bomer: Many of you have an opinion about him! The actor is openly gay, but not “openly” as in “tell all the fans of his USA Network show,” but “openly” as in “Hollywood industry knows and that’s as far as we want this story going.” Which explains why there was such an effort to get Queerty to yank its story about how his partner is Simon Halls, chief of publicity giant PMK (pictured, right), and how they are raising kids together, and how there are photos floating around of him smooching on his ex-boyfriend. But when Details asked him about the rumors — rumors! — he’s a mo, he responded like this:

“I don’t care about that at all. I’m completely happy and fulfilled in my personal life.”

bomer3

This may be true! But his way of showing how much he doesn’t “care” about the rumors is to not acknowledge the obvious. “I have a network and a show riding on my shoulders,” he tells the magazine (via BoyCulture). “I would say a big difference between my character and me is that I can be too trusting. And I’ve realized in this business, that’s not necessarily the smartest thing to be. I definitely have a thing or two to learn from the con artists.”

Oh man, what rabbit hole did we just go down? Sounds like somebody’s been duped in this Hollywood industry. And it wouldn’t be the first time. But here we have a magazine asking questions that needn’t be answered, because the questions themselves — and your non-answers! — essentially confirm the, ahem, rumors.

Which is fine. It’s how Bomer is playing the game. And it’s not going to keep us from tuning in every week to see Neal Caffrey solve major heists and bone hot chicks.Woot!

By:           editor editor
On:           Jan 14, 2010
Tagged: , , , , , , ,
  • 176 Comments
    • Comeoutwhereveryouare
      Comeoutwhereveryouare

      What a loser. As so many other self-hating cowardly queens in Hollywood, he wants all the fame, the riches, the money, the adulation, BUT not the responsibility. Yes, he is living the grand gay life, of a pretty Hollywood boy with high connections who otherwise would’ve probably gotten nowhere. Because like him in WeHo there are a dime a dozen. You are openly gay to the industry but cannot answer honestly when a magazine asks you? Shame on the magazine and on the reporter for being such accommodating wimps, and shame on Bomer for not admitting what gives him a boner. Pathetic: “I don’t care about that at all.” Sure, wait till your fellow gays shun you and your show’s cancelled. Then you’ll come out officially to the world, right? Go do something productive with your life. Like help people in need in Haiti.

      Jan 14, 2010 at 6:57 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Saki
      Saki

      @Comeoutwhereveryouare: What is the responsibility of Matt? He is famous not because he is gay. He is famous because he is a great actor. His first responsibility is to protect the show and to entertaining fans. Like he said, he has a network and a show on his shoulder.

      What if the show doesn’t want him to talk about his gay life openly? Isn’t it his responsibility to say nothing about the gay things? Actually, everybody can tell that he has admited the gay rumor from the interview by themselves only if he has brains. He is hiding nothing.

      And how did you know what he The same recommand to you: go do something productive with your life and stop judging how people should live their lives.

      Jan 14, 2010 at 7:21 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Bubblicious
      Bubblicious

      @no2
      Oh please Sake, stop apologizing for pretty Hollywood starlets, grow up. Did you really read the asinine and insulting answer he gave? Actually, do you even know how to read?

      Jan 14, 2010 at 7:25 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • SenorEspada
      SenorEspada

      Umm, a great actor Saki? On USA Network? Wow, that’s a stretch, isn’t it?

      Jan 14, 2010 at 7:26 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Saki
      Saki

      Sorry, the last paragraph is messed up.

      How did you know he has done nothing to the gay community or people in Haiti? Just because you don’t know, it doesn’t mean that he and his boy friedn did nothing. I preciated his attitude that stop labelling other people and yourself with gay or straight, live your own life and give no damn what other people think.

      The same recommand to you: go do something productive with your life and stop judging how people should live their lives.

      Jan 14, 2010 at 7:30 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Comeoutwhereveryouare
      Comeoutwhereveryouare

      Let’s see Saki, what has Bomer done for the gay community?

      Jan 14, 2010 at 7:33 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)
      John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)

      @Comeoutwhereveryouare:

      Meee-OW.

      _roll eyes_

      Jan 14, 2010 at 7:44 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Mr.Woo
      Mr.Woo

      COme to China, we all have boners.

      Jan 14, 2010 at 7:46 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)
      John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)

      Urgh.

      It’s not Stephen Huvane. It’s Simon Halls Queerty.

      Jan 14, 2010 at 7:47 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      I’m with Saki.

      It’s Bomer’s life and he can lead it anyway he wants to as long as he doesn’t hurt anyone.

      Jan 14, 2010 at 11:20 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Lukas P.
      Lukas P.

      Yep, it’d be great if Bomer did fabulous things for the gay communities, but I personally pick which shows to watch based on the writing, the acting and the storyline.

      Jan 14, 2010 at 11:35 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • mk
      mk

      I guess (or hope?) that headline is supposed to be ironic but really it’s just misleading. Whatever you think about the ethics of Matt’s decision to stay in the glass closet he is definitely in the glass closet.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 12:22 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • YellowRanger
      YellowRanger

      @Comeoutwhereveryouare:

      “Wah waah wah, I’m tragically insecure in my own sexuality, so I require famous people to come out in order to validate me.”

      Jan 15, 2010 at 12:42 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Comeoutwhereveryouare
      Comeoutwhereveryouare [Different person #1 using similar name]

      @no.13
      What an imbecile you are YellowRanger. Or should I say, PissRanger?

      Jan 15, 2010 at 12:43 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Ted B. (Charging Rhino)
      Ted B. (Charging Rhino)

      Considering that he and his partner have young kids at home is reason to be more circumspect about their home life…and some privacy.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 12:48 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • JohnathanHasHadIt
      JohnathanHasHadIt

      @no15
      Ted, straight actors get asked all sorts of private questions, all the time, including about their children. Why should a gay celebrity be held to a different standard?

      Jan 15, 2010 at 12:49 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • YellowRanger
      YellowRanger

      @Comeoutwhereveryouare:

      You mad.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 2:21 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • NoDoubleStandards
      NoDoubleStandards

      @JohnathanHasHadIt: This is the damage done to gay men as described in the Perry trial. Internalized double standards of straight versus gay. I am guessing many here do not even notice straight sexuality because they have been taught it is normal while gay men are taught to think of their sexuality as abnormal. Even when you come out, this baggage is a HUGE issue. So, I don’t expect any the guys defending the actor to get how big of a psychological issue it is since they are not dealing with it in themselves.

      The problem is not this one actor as they keep saying in every instance. The problem is all of the actors, and all the internalized issues that develop for gay people. The totality of our society telling us that despite how out we are that there is something wrong with us. People develop coping mechanisms to address like you see along this thread.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 6:19 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • NoDoubleStandards
      NoDoubleStandards

      This contributes to the private hell of an inauthentic life that gay people in general feel where no matter how “out” you are, there are always barriers to one’s outness, if for not other reason than safety (don’t hands there, don’t use that wrong pronoun, should I come out now and on and on and on and on and on and on):

      “He’s talking about the context of actual stress, how people find ways to cope with actual and anticipated prejudice or discrimination. To stay safe or simply to ease social intercourse — what plaintiff Kris Perry talked about Monday when she said sometimes she just wanted to buy the microwave from the guy in the store rather than have to come out all over again, and to a person they’ll never likely see again — gays and lesbians mask who we are, which is a huge cognitive effort over time. We are, whether wholely closeted in the workplace or simply masking our relationship when checking into a hotel, lying. And we are lying about a central aspect of our humanity; we are lying about who we love. Or, in the dry dissecting words of the counsel for defendant-intervenors, “express an active erotic or emotional desire for persons of the same sex.”

      http://seminal.firedoglake.com/diary/24076

      Some of the people posting here should spend a little less time typing, and do what I have been doing- reading. I read this, and it made me feel connected somehow to the appearances of others. My experiences are uniquely my own, but the emotional empathy is there regarding the dynamics.

      This actor can do what he wants. But this is what he contributes to. We all do this. Rather than trying to turn this into a virtue, let’s call it what it is: fear.

      Fear is a necessary part of life. Don’t stick your hand in the fire. But, fire can destroy you too.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 6:27 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Lukas P.
      Lukas P.

      @NoDoubleStandards:
      Lovely essays but the link with the TOPIC of an actor on a TV show was hard to piece together. Perhaps you might flesh your ideas out, citing relevant examples of what you’re saying, and also referring to appropriate scientific literature on gay identity though the lifespan, and THEN post them on your blog or one which focuses on the topic you’re so passionate about.

      Best of luck to you on your research and your mission!

      Jan 15, 2010 at 8:38 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Ehrenstein
      David Ehrenstein

      “The actor is openly gay, but not “openly” as in “tell all the fans of his USA Network show,” but “openly” as in “Hollywood industry knows and that’s as far as we want this story going.”

      IOW it’s just like being slightly pregnant.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 8:50 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • ThatBitchTeaDelgado
      ThatBitchTeaDelgado

      On the one hand, he’s not lying. But, on the other hand, he’s not doing anything to help the cause publicly. I wish he had some balls.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 9:10 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • ghettoisto
      ghettoisto

      I agree w/ most of the comments here.

      I thought the whole point of equality is to NOT have to attach the “gay” label to ourselves w/ everything we do. So now he’s a villian for not wearing a rainbow flag to work?

      Here’s an actor who JUST got the break of a lifetime – a chance that something like .1% of actors EVER achieve. It’s a tough-ass profession people (even when you look like Matt). So yeah, let’s crucify him for not putting it all in jeopardy because w/in the first FEW MONTHS on the job (when in most professions you’re technically on probation), he’s not John of Arc.

      Give him a moment – and a break.
      Live and let live.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 9:41 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)
      John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)

      @Lukas P.:

      How sweet of you.

      @NoDoubleStandards:

      Very true but you’re talking to truelly nasty, short sigthted commenters with a severe case of selective memory.

      One always wonders what they have done which has been so monumental or profound towards the gay community and it’s more likely than not nothing but b*tching and squealing.

      When you’re dealing with a minority culture with such deep issues of severe self hate, in fighting and disparation like the gay community and similarly the black community, you have an irrational and insane case of ‘crabs in a barrell’.

      It’s that whole thing of ‘I’ll be damned if you don’t come out and I f*cking had to’ and similarly with the black comm ‘I’ll be damned if you get treated better because you’re lighter or a better class and I get cr*p because I’m darker or from the ghetto’..

      So trying to enage in intelligent, perceptive or even interesting dialogue with people from these groups, esp on a blog is just aint gonna happen.

      Esp Queerty.

      You may be best posting on a gay site were people enjoy discourse and actually want progression within their community instead of setting back all the time because people are not playing to their views, values or idealogues.

      Interestingly enough NPH was outed by Perez Hilton in a big way. He’d also had a much, much longer time to have a string fan base due to much earlier and wider fame/success. But he was OUT to industry. I wonder what David Ehrenstein thinks of THAT?

      With Matt, Perez did the same thing with less funfare. His publicist simply said ‘no comment’. NPH’s publicist actually said ‘he was NOT GAY, not NO COMMENT’. There were pictures. A friend politely came on blogs saying that yes Matt is gay, partnered and with kids can please take the pictures down. Queerty didn’t take anything down. Matt could’ve denied but he hasn’t it’s obvious he is gay and now in Details, because he’s not saying ‘I’m gay’, he must be taken to hell.

      Now what is more progressive to the homophobic lot? A gay man with kids being out in proud within his public.

      Or a gay guy like NPH who can’t stop going on about how ‘normal he is. How he isn’t an activist’ etc etc?

      Please.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 10:16 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      @No. 24 · John from England(used to be just John but there are other John’s)
      I agree.

      @NoDoubleStandards:
      Again. You are just seeing what YOU want to see. How about you look at it from Matt’s end and what his goals are in life. As some peeps have said, he’s out in Public (of course that’s not good enough for some people, he needs to do this, he needs to do that, whine, whine, to be a good gay). But maybe, he does want to protect his kids. Maybe, making it BIG TIME in the acting business is a goal (which I think most actors want to do, altho some do like getting good work, but why do you think some of those big actors take the popcorn films, so they can do the small stuff) and you just can’t play with the big boys if you’re out. Sad fact but true (and please don’t bring up NPH or some such nonsense. See John’s post again. NPH was outed. Had a career before he was outed. AND doesn’t open big movies.).

      Jan 15, 2010 at 10:33 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      Oh and for all those peeps disappointed in Matt or not approving of him. Why don’t YOU become an actor, get a tv series or big movie and make sure you tell EVERYONE you’re gay and apply the same standards to yourself. Then YOU can be the shining beacon that you wish others to be. And let’s see how easy it is for you to achieve as well.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 10:36 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • NoDoubleStandards
      NoDoubleStandards

      @Lukas P.: That’s because you live in a world where you think are not all connected to each other. So you can not see how each of us acts to create the world in which we live. Put it this way: Think of this like a social butterfly effect. Each action alone is not enough, but each action together creates what we see. The actor’s behavior is part of a greater set of behaviors that leads to what we see in our society. He is only responsible for his own actions, but he is responsible for his own actions. He’s a part of this society. Saying he is “just an actor”in that context is a cop out. Sure, he’s just an actor, but he’s also other things too. And being a gay man, who is even being coy about being gay, harms the rest of us. I am not saying what he should do., I am saying the harm his action causes. That’s the point of the essay.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 10:43 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • NoDoubleStandards
      NoDoubleStandards

      @John from England(used to be just John but there are other John’s): The ‘activist” ploy is one of those PR arguments that irks me. No one is asking them to be an activist. this sets being gay up as per se something to be seen as a circus show rather than just a part of life. I rarely focus on being gay, but even I realize what I do things out of fear. I am not excluding myself from these issues. In fact, I see a lot o fmyself in these people. The point of it is that I am also not going to pretend my flaws are a virtue. My fears over being gay in a society are not a virtue. It is not like I spend my life as THE GAY GUY. But, it is also not like it is not a really big aspect of who I am. I was helping a family member yesterday, and a delivery guy who was hot dropped off a hospital bed for her. Does that mean that I am not a caring family member because I felt sexually attracted to the delivery guy? Does one aspect of me deny the other? I don’t think so, and yet we are always presented with this false choice, and it kind of pisses me off.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 10:50 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • NoDoubleStandards
      NoDoubleStandards

      @scott ny’er: What makes you think I don’t look at it from his view?

      The same fears he has- I have.

      You assume a lot. My point is not that I don’t share his fears. It is the opposite. It is that I do understand his fears. We all as gay men have them.

      The point is not to turn out flaws (our fears) into virtue or it turns into pathos.

      That’s the point of the link that I provided.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 10:52 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • MissUnderstood
      MissUnderstood

      The point here is, he keeps skirting the issue, while living an allegedly gay life with the same gay Hollywood executives who keep the closet doors shut because of their fear of affecting their bank accounts.
      Yes, Bomer just got a series. Yes, he got a break. Yes, he doesn´t have to be a beacon. BUT: if he is asked a question like any other straight celebrity, why not answer it honestly? I agree with someone here who said “Matt, grow some balls”. This is the typical case of wanting your cake and eating it too. Why shouldn’t he be proud of living with another man, who happens to be a power broker in Hollywood? Why shouldn’t he be glad to accept that he has a family, with children? Please, if everyone in the industry knows, I am sure it is other gays advising him to be coy and speak “doublespeak.” The time for that is over.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 11:02 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      @NoDoubleStandards:
      But everything can cause harm. You just might not know it. Take it one step further, or back. If I don’t cross the street here and cross the street the next block over, I might have caused harm because I might have helped some old woman cross the street and because I went over a block, she got hit by a car.

      Maybe his actions now may make him into something bigger that has more “beneficial” actions to LGBT peeps in the future.

      I didn’t read your link. I will later.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 11:03 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Ehrenstein
      David Ehrenstein

      NPH was out and about all over town with David long before Mario Laundry “outed” him. He hadn’t at that point done a major interview since he was a wee tyke — much less The Full Oprah. So he defied his publicist (undoubtedly gay) and came out in a Big Big Way.

      Being an out public personality is gay activism. That’s why creeps like Bomer don’t want to do it. They’re closet queens to the manner born.

      Of course it’s a lot harder to be a closet queen in the post-NPH era, so he plays all sorts of games. Like Jodie Foster.

      And we all see what wonders the closet has done to her career, haven’t we? (See also Kevin Spacey.)

      Jan 15, 2010 at 11:06 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • WalMartWannabe
      WalMartWannabe

      @no. 32.
      Eloquently and well said David. Now if only Bomer could read some of this and grow a conscience. OH, wait, I forgot, he’s in Hollywood. My bad.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 11:08 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • NoDoubleStandards
      NoDoubleStandards

      @scott ny’er: The point is if everyone accepts the reasons stated for this guy not coming out then nothing changes. Why should it since we all have reasons in our lives to fear the consequences of what we do? I simply following the logical conclusion of the arguments being made here. I am afraid too, and so are others. Politicians are afraid to stand up for us for various reasons- is this okay? The point is where does this stop? This example is a silly one, but it illustrates the deeper problem.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 11:19 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      @David Ehrenstein: Out and about all over town is NOT the same as being out in a nationally distributed magazine.

      Jodie Foster OPENS movies and makes millions of dollars. She has 2 Oscars. Her career cannot be put into the same framework as NPHs. Plus, I think it’s harder for woman to have kids and be on the top. But she’s been one of the top female movie actors for a long time.

      Kevin Spacey has been nominated for an a Tony, won an Oscar. And has 4 movies in development.

      If you’re saying that if Kevin and Jodie had come out of the closet they’re careers would be more better at this point, I’d say you’d be wrong.

      Name a major movie actor/actress who is out and highly successful in movies after they came out. Other than Sir Ian McKellen, I can’t name one. And Sir Ian does not open movies.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 11:21 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      @WalMartWannabe: Again. Take the challenge. Try and be a successful, out actor. Successful meaning, being the lead in a tv series. Being a lead in a major motion film.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 11:23 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      @NoDoubleStandards: I agree. Nothing changes. But I won’t judge him. I do not walk in his shoes. And until others do, walk in his shoes, I say, don’t judge him either.

      It’s exactly how Heteros judge us. Live and let live. Maybe there will be another actor who feels he/she can come out while being a major lead in series. Ellen did it. And is successful with her tv series. And some LGBT still judge her, saying she doesn’t support this and that, blah, blah. Rosie did it and has not recovered in her career.

      Honestly, when did Matt Bromer become Jesus to LGBT. The pressure you guys put on people. If they came out Great. If not, move on. There is always someone else. Sheesh.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 11:30 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • NoDoubleStandards
      NoDoubleStandards

      @scott ny’er: If you want to talk to me, one of the best ground rules for engagement is no hyperbole. Your post at the end is hyperbolic. Also, repeating back to me my problem with what is being advocated here as if it is an answer is a non-starter. My point is that I am not going to make excuses for people like some of you are rushing to do. I suspect that you do so because of your own sense of inadequate courage.

      I do judge him because the question is one of not just being a coward, which he is, but also using trying to pass that cowardice off as virtue. If there was not this sense by me that he’s trying to flip this into some accusation, I might be more forgiving.

      Again, that’s my issue here. There is nothing virtuous about being afraid as others here are trying to imply.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 11:44 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Ehrenstein
      David Ehrenstein

      “Out and about all over town is NOT the same as being out in a nationally distributed magazine.”

      Because interest in the Out and Proud hasn’t been a concern of “Nationally distributed magazines” — save as a freakshow.

      Jodie’s career is over. She is Box Office Poison. Spacey too. Sure those two Oscars keep him warm at night.

      Got any more excuses for the closet KAPO?

      Jan 15, 2010 at 12:00 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Ehrenstein
      David Ehrenstein

      And BTW, the recent passing of Eric Rohmer recalls th star of one of his most famous films “Claire’s Knee” was the late great Jean-Claude Brialy.

      Brialy was out his entire life and career.

      Extra Gay Jeopardy Bonus Points: He also,uh, discovered Alain Delon.

      (In his bed.)

      Jan 15, 2010 at 12:04 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)
      John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)

      @David Ehrenstein:

      Oh yeah we all know the press back then was just as bad as the mental press today riiiight?

      No.

      We have ‘teh’ Internet!

      Jan 15, 2010 at 12:12 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)
      John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)

      “virtuous”

      Who’s used that word? I thought the consensus here was live the dude alone, he hasn’t exactly denied being gay. We’ve seen pictures. And erm, he’s buddy personally came and said that he’s partnered with kids.

      Yawn.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 12:16 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)
      John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)

      “Jodie’s career is over. She is Box Office Poison. Spacey too. Sure those two Oscars keep him warm at night.”

      Which is when they came out!! Lol!

      Jan 15, 2010 at 12:18 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)
      John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)

      @David Ehrenstein:

      “NPH was out and about all over town with David long before Mario Laundry “outed” him. He hadn’t at that point done a major interview since he was a wee tyke — much less The Full Oprah. So he defied his publicist (undoubtedly gay) and came out in a Big Big Way.”

      And what Bomer isn’t?

      Helloooo??

      He is LIVING with a guy and they’re looking after kids!!? He’s best buds with all the gay crew inc Zach Quinto….

      I mean he’s NEVER been in. We even saw pics with a boyf a few years back….but with NPH…was he out and proud post Doogie Howser? Nah, it was when his star had fallen.

      Again, it was easier for HIM because he’s already reached a peak in his career and he may have MANY more but he had nothing to loose. He’d already had a hugely successful prime time show on TV.

      That’s something to be proud of.

      But I will say he’s a good example of someone who has made the best out of it but again is NPH leading man status? Come on boys. Ladies still see him as ‘Doogie!’..

      But Matt IS leading man status whether he is your type or not.

      Here’s a link of what some female commenters said about him after Queerty went overboard with the pics of him kissing the guy.

      “Now that i have seenthe picture of him liplocking another man , i’m not watching white collar again i get to choose what i watch and it won’t be that show just my own little say=so”

      Read more: http://justjared.buzznet.com/2009/10/30/matthew-bomer-white-collar-hunk/comment-page-2/#comments#ixzz0cheVGBEa

      Jan 15, 2010 at 12:28 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)
      John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)

      @NoDoubleStandards:

      I’m not saying it’s right.

      Like politics, I DESPISE the way these industries work and it stinks, esp as 99% of hollywood is frigging gay and the fact that some of the most homophobic and cruel people to gays from Africa to Tennessee watch these movies thinking this dudes are str8, makes my blood boil.

      And what is so sick is that Hollywood has the capacity to be a lot more caring and education towards homophobia but they do nothing, except for the very few.

      But as we see in Queerty, Towler etc, gays are very different to each other and there are A LOT of wealthy Hollywood gays who are right wing, self hating and in turn make an actor or actresses life HELL is she/he comes out.

      It’s all about economics.

      If you’ve invested in a product =actor/actress, you want the maximum ROI you can get on the product. You want a return on all that marketing you have done to make sure your product sells to make a good profit to cover overheads-fees,operations,staff.

      So when you have a product in a market that is about ‘illusion’ and ‘creating the perfect story’ to ‘sell’ an idea of seductive reality, you’re sh*tting your ass that if your product comes out as gay, you aint gonna get no ROI.

      Furthermore, the product is dud. So the ratings falls which means the studio loose money, you don’t cover overheads and you can’t use the product anymore because they can’t ‘sell’ a TV show.

      It is also harder for you (as the agent) to find your product more work or yourself because people don’t touch failure.

      Your best bet for a gay actor who is gorgeous and who women really fancied? Try the gay sector.

      Poor profit. Not lucrative. You on’t get any good roles. You’ll never be able to dream of that peak-like NPH had with Doogie…..

      Do I like this. No.

      But I don’t think Bomer is the anti-christ, esp as he had friend politely come and say that he was partnered with kids. He could’ve just kept quite but instead (stupidly) thought he could reach out to the gay blogs.

      Ha! Ha! How wrong he was!! The gays are your enemies Matt unless you play to THEIR righteous tune!

      Jan 15, 2010 at 12:43 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      @John from England(used to be just John but there are other John’s):
      Ha! Ha! How wrong he was!! The gays are your enemies Matt unless you play to THEIR righteous tune!
      ==============
      Exactly. It’s all about them.

      I would forget talking business, because it seems that doesn’t factor in with those who judge Matt. It’s all about them and what he can do for them. Like he owes them something.

      I still haven’t heard anyone take up the challenge either.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 12:54 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      @David Ehrenstein: Not excuses. It’s facts. 2 Oscars for Jodie. 1 Oscar for Kevin. Whatchu got?

      Jan 15, 2010 at 1:04 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Just Done
      Just Done

      I am done with this site and the negativity, bitterness and self-riteousness that permeates everything here. I’ve tried and tried to look past it, but it just kept getting worse and worse in the past few months. I prefer dignity and thoughtfulness.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 1:23 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Lucas
      Lucas

      NoDoubleStandards should win an award. Most articulate arguments I’ve read on Queerty in forever.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 2:10 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • NoDoubleStandards
      NoDoubleStandards

      @John from England(used to be just John but there are other John’s): I must say many of you are seem to have the gay gene for hyperbole here. I agree this is not a huge issue, but on the divide between do I think it is okay that he is out or not- I am going with the side that says it is not okay. Why? Because of the reasons I state. Every little bit matters. As for the rest, I am not sure what you are talking about since it seems to have very little to do with how one feels if he is out or not. He sounds in other ways like a nice enough guy, but in this way he is lacking. Humans are that way. We fuck up in some ways, and not in others. I don’t feel the need to excuse where we are lacking by dressing it up as privacy and other silliness that clearly are not at play with public figures like actors. At the end of the day, he’s doing this because he’s afraid. If everyone just sort of said that, and stopped making excuses for it or rationalizing it like Just Done is doing, then I’d be okay.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 2:12 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      @NoDoubleStandards: Wow. Thanks for the lesson. Not only judgmental but condescending. Are you sure you can stand to be in the presence of others here? You are so very virtuous, we might taint you beyond all recognition and then you’d have to make excuses for yourself. But you don’t do that. So it’s a quandry.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 2:15 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)
      John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)

      @NoDoubleStandards:

      Hyperbole? Me?

      I’m confused about what you are confused about.

      I said I agree with you 100%, even more as I am very much an activist.

      And I laid out why in comparison to other ‘gays’ we know that Bomer doesn’t deserve the sh*t he is been given.

      I also went further to simply non hyperbole explain the business of being a commodity/product as an actor.

      So why the bitch?

      What do you want? Blood?

      I consistently support your frustrations but I’m practically stating what we all ready know of the world of ‘show-BUSINESS’.

      It sucks. (I said this before) But we’ve made it like this. Our obsession with film stars? With beauty? An ideal we chase?

      Dude, I’d have it all irradicated but I’m aware that some people get some sort of inspiration or satisfication from this.

      Hey, if you want to live in my ideal world, lets read Satre, political science..research the concept of activsim…plus only watch french and south american independent existentialist films!

      But you know, we’re all different. Ruled by capitalism, money and people who are obsessed by the rich and famous…..

      Out of curiousity, what are you doing to stop people like Bomer? Or future Bomer’s?

      You could start a facebook page…

      Small steps but you may have more support than you think.

      All the best.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 2:54 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • NoDoubleStandards
      NoDoubleStandards

      On the note of both your exaggerated responses, I am going to bow out. This is why i don’t come to this site much or any gay site actually.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 3:18 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Colby412
      Colby412

      Bomer is a douche. He has a partner and 2 children and still can’t be true to himself. What a great life his children are going to have. What example are you teaching children by not being true to who you are? Drag the kids into the closet and teach them to live in a world of lies. Bomer obviously values fame and money more than being true to himself.

      As for Ian Mckellen not being able to open a movie what actor/actress over 50 can open a movie? Ian might not be able to open a film but with DaVinci Code, X-Men franchise and Lord of the Rings being some of the biggest blockbusters over the past decade it doesn’t seem that being an out gay actor affected the box office.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 4:06 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)
      John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)

      Happy Thoughts! Happy Thoughts!

      We are who you are! Lest not judge each other!

      Hugs!

      Now for all the lovers of OUT folk…

      How cute is this article on G Thomas??

      http://www.afterelton.com/blog/dennis/gareth-thomas-has-attitude

      But lol, the bitches will be there Gareth, however sincere you are or how much you tried to commite suicide!

      Sucker! You should’ve been OUT or dead because of shame you’ve put on the gay community for not being out.

      Truly evil.

      M gallagher. M Bomer…G Thomas….

      So many enemies against our community!!

      Jan 15, 2010 at 4:29 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Herb
      Herb

      I always love how when someone says, “[sic]Lest not judge each other!” — the next thing they do is judge others.

      In this day and age, there are very few excuses for an adult gay person in the U.S. to be closeted.

      We can wish and want all we want how it would be nice just to be gay without any baggage coming with it, but that is not the world we now live in, so ignoring homophobia is not an answer.

      Those who sit on the sidelines while others carry their share of water for equal rights get no sympathy from me.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 5:30 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Spence
      Spence

      Matt is not closeted at all. You may disagree with his responses, but name callers here sound like childish fools. He is actually a wonderful person, anyone saying otherwise has never met the man and would be a liar. Matt is heading to the Hollywood actor A-list and knows exactly how to get there.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 5:41 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • ScottK
      ScottK

      Matt’s private life is his own, no one’s business. But I would love to trade places with Mr. Halls for a day – Mr. Bomer is a gift to us all…

      Jan 15, 2010 at 5:52 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Caitlin
      Caitlin

      Everybody here has a right to express their opinion, but I have to say that for a site representing people who have to fight against prejudice every day, there’s a heck of a lot of judgement going on here. We don’t know Matt or his reasons for giving the responses he does. It’s easy to say he should just come out to the world when you’re able to live a much more private life. Not that I’m trying to take a “poor little famous boy” angle, but most people who comment here don’t have possibly millions of people watching everything they say. And anyway, from what I’ve heard, network executives are playing as much as part in what Matt says as he does himself. Would I prefer it if he’d come forward and be totally open? Yes. And I hope we’ll see him lending support to efforts to support equality. But as we see in so many ways how horrible it is to have people critisizing the way you live your life, I’m surprised people are so quick to do the same themselves.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 7:15 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • alan brickman
      alan brickman

      Does he really need to spell it out to certain gays with crayons and children’s spelling blocks? put him in Morning Goods already…

      Jan 15, 2010 at 7:32 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • GetRealDude
      GetRealDude

      @no.57:
      “Matt is heading to the Hollywood actor A-list and knows exactly how to get there”. He sure does know how to get there. Being part of Hollywood’s shameful game of covering up homosexuality, like his “bud” Zach Quinto; having a high-power broker in the industry for a bf; refusing to acknowledge who he is and proudly stating it while seeking the publicity. So yeah, he’s the way to being on the A-list: the Asshole-list.

      Jan 15, 2010 at 7:40 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • BenScott
      BenScott

      Now I know where all the losers from high school ended up – the ones with no friends in the corner of the lunch room. So much hate on this site. I google a hot guy named Bomer and all I get is this hateful shit. What a bunch of hypocrites – he never denied he was gay, you losers. I guess good news for him is that he is gorgeous, enjoying a great life while all of you furiously type hate from your little home offices on a Friday night. Headin out for a fun night here in DC – get a life…

      Jan 15, 2010 at 8:01 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • JohnathanHasHadIt
      JohnathanHasHadIt [Different person #1 using similar name]

      @BenScott, you are here typing as well. On a Friday night. And yeah, you’re going out. Right…

      Jan 15, 2010 at 8:04 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Tonyboy
      Tonyboy

      BenScott, having spent much time in DC it’s obvious you don’t what you are talking about about Bomer or DC. “DC” and “fun night” don’t really match. If you said “NY” or “San Fran” then you would know what you are talking about.

      Jan 16, 2010 at 2:26 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • DAHstra
      DAHstra

      So you didn’t get the answers you want so you could spam the world about it. Get over it. Show some respect. Behavior like this article portrays is disrespectful and seedy.

      Jan 16, 2010 at 11:08 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • BenScott
      BenScott

      Actually TBoy, I spend every 3rd week in NYC on business/pleasure and since I’m bi-coastal (Palm Springs), we popped up to San Franscisco for New Years weekend which was kind of a disappointing yawn…Believe me, I know what I’m talking about on all counts above, because unlike most here, I’m not narrow minded and think before I type.

      Jan 16, 2010 at 11:56 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • PissedOffChristoph
      PissedOffChristoph

      As a young gay man, I find it incredibly disconcerting the number of people who are going out of their way to defend Bomer’s decision to refuse to acknowledge his sexuality. Especially those who think that he has a right to ‘privacy’ or to access the Hollywood A-List and earn mega-bucks; evidently, the middle-class, capitalist, individualist, Gay Resort going, pink-dollar spending liberal shamefag lives on. You all sound like Kushner’s Roy Cohn in ‘Angels in America': “I don’t have AIDS. AIDS is for homosexuals. I have liver cancer”.

      Any of you who think this is just about Bomer being gay are completely missing the point. It’s not about the intimate details of a single person’s life – it’s about the position that they occupy, their political agency and their capacity to bring about change. Call me a ‘crazy radical’ but armed with the knowledge of the history of our oppression and our continued struggle, across the world, to be seen as equal (socially, economically, politically and so forth), I think that if you have the capacity to bring about change then it’s your responsibility to use it.

      Hollywood is conservative and backward-thinking – we all agree about that. But by using that as a justification for remaining closeted, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. How is Hollywood going to hire and test its theories on openly gay actors if they’re all too busy with beards and denials, trying to construct images of themselves as living in straight paradise? Why do we accept, and in some of the comments to this blog, support this homophobia – would we legitimise it in any other industry? Of course not, and it’s so much worse because actors and Hollywood have such an important position in our cultural consumption and consciousness; they’re the ones we see day after day, week after week, for years and decades – we probably see or hear about some of them more often than we do our own family. They are public faces and they command attention across continents; they can make a difference. The last, and most damaging thing is for them to be ashamed.

      When you’re in the public eye, people are going to adore or idolise or hate or listen to you regardless of whether or not that was ever what you wanted. Your words and actions are communicated everywhere and people are going to take notice. The more actors that remain closeted in Hollywood the more we all go on accepting that being gay is a disadvantage and something that should be hidden; that’s the broad social ramification of continuing to condone closeting in general (and is especially pertinent in Hollywood where the results reach billions of people). The more we accept that being gay is a ‘privacy’ issue the more our plight for equality, our struggles and our stories remain just as private and silenced. This is about visibility and the pride and political agency that comes with that.

      I’m not saying that Bomer has to become an activist (even though it would be great if he did), but he needs to come out openly and cleanly if only just to be visible. In doing so, he says “this is who I am” – he makes a mark on Hollywood, the gay community, society – and from then on, he can talk as much or as little about it as he wants. As other comments have mentioned, many actors choose to be quiet about their personal lives and that’s perfectly fine – but an actor’s assumption of ‘privacy’ with regards to being gay suggests they have no interest in anything other than maintaining their straight paradise perception and their profitability. They are trading off a public benefit for their bank balance – the widespread condoning of this in the comments above perfectly demonstrates the individualist liberal approach to gay rights (eg. middle-class gays looking at middle-class straights and saying “hey, we want to be just like you in every way!”).

      Coming out doesn’t mean that everything about you is gay. It means that you recognise that some part of you is gay, and that you’re connected to gays all across the world who are also oppressed and fighting for equality – whether you want to be or not. It means solidarity, being unafraid to speak up, and most important of all – leaving shame in the closet. Actors are already mouthpieces; out actors are heard even louder.

      The rhetoric about ‘who cares if you’re gay’ and ‘straight actors don’t have to come out so why do gay actors’ is tired and weak but also very, very true because our society is organised and structured around the concept of normative heterosexuality. And until it isn’t – until every last piece of discriminatory legislation and form of social organisation in every last country is gone – being gay is always going to make you different and render you lesser.

      There is enough discrimination against us in the world already. We don’t need closeted actors and simple-minded fans to perpetuate the self-loathing.

      Take a stand and recognise who you are, Bomer – and all of you.

      Grow up and be proud.

      Jan 16, 2010 at 11:57 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Ehrenstein
      David Ehrenstein

      KAPO From England — neither Spacey or Jodie are out. I’m sure it suits your purposes to pretend they are, but as Ronald reagan said “Facts are stupid things>”

      Jan 16, 2010 at 12:21 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Ehrenstein
      David Ehrenstein

      KAPO From England:”And what Bomer isn’t?

      Helloooo??

      He is LIVING with a guy and they’re looking after kids!!? He’s best buds with all the gay crew inc Zach Quinto….”

      So why is he all “no Commnet” ow?

      (crickets chirping)

      Jan 16, 2010 at 12:23 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jeff
      Jeff

      I would assume that Matt Bomer and his handlers had some control over the content of the interview and that he could have refused to answer the question and/or had it deleted. At least he didn’t lie in responding to the same and I do respect him for that. I recently spoke with a friend, a struggling gay actor in LA and the stories of rampant homophobia in the industry are heartbreaking. He’s met Matt Bomer and says that he’s a great guy, out, super into his family and that my friend and other gay actors totally understood the dilemma that he faced – possible longterm career repurcussions, flak from the network, homophobic discrimination from producers, agents, managers, casting agents, studio execs, etc. Out indie actor Matthew Montgomery had a similar take on the subject. For years the Butterfly McQueens and Esther Waters were subjected to racism until Sidney Poitier and Diahann Carroll finally broke absurd barriers and stereotypes, followed by the breakthrough triumphs of Will Smith and Halle Berry. Rita Moreno did the same on behalf of Latin actors. In retrospect, instead of berating Matt Bomer, perhaps we should start helping our LGBT brethren by writing to the various networks, etc., praising the work of LGBT actors like Luke MacFarlane, NPH, John Barrowman, Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Cheyenne Jackson, Jonathan Groff (allegedly soon to play Lea Michele’s love interest on “Glee”), Scott Evans, Nicholas Rodriguez, Thom Bierdz, et al and yes, Matt Bomer. The LGBT is a viable audience demographic and we should start supporting our own, using our economic clout, the internet, etc., to help end said homophobia. Criticze unfair practices (Adam Lambert’s blacklisting) and steroetyping (wouldn’t it have been more interesting if Robert Gant or Cheyenne Jackson or some hot bear type had played Jesse Tyler Ferguson’s partner on “Modern Family” as opposed to some overweight straight actor (they might prove to be more threatening to straigth males but they can get over it) or if Chris Colfer’s character on “Glee” was not so fey or a character like Puck turns out to be gay? Our community is composed of many different of individuals, after all. Why not have Gabriel Romero or Raul Esperanza (sp?), who are 100% Hispanic, play Gloria’s husband on “Modern Family,” rather than a name like Benjamin Bratt. That would have been progressive casting. In other words, perhaps we should take a more positive approach and rather than attack the Matt Bomers in the industry start supporting those who need our support the most.

      Perhaps the LGBT blogs and press and LGBT fans can pressure our so called straight allies – Brad and Angelina, George Clooney, Meryl Streep, Sean Penn, Drew Barrymore, Susan Sarandon, Matt Damon, Anne Hathaway, Julia Roberts, Sandra Bullock,et al., and a score of directors and producers,etc. to become more proactive and give non-stereotypical major roles to talented LGBT actors. The concept of attaching a name to a project does not necessarily assure that the best actor for a role gets it anyway and under the defunct studio system roles were assigned to those actors under contract and classics were still produced. Let our so called allies step up to the plate and put their money where their mouth is. Just a thought.

      On a lighter note, I would suggest that Ben Scott rent “Mean Girls” to gain a bit of perspective on the real losers in high school.

      Best,

      Jeff R

      Jan 16, 2010 at 12:24 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Ehrenstein
      David Ehrenstein

      Spence: “Matt is not closeted at all.”

      ScottK: “Matt’s private life is his own, no one’s business”

      See? He’s a floor wax AND a dessert topping!

      Jan 16, 2010 at 12:26 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Lucas
      Lucas

      @PissedOffChristoph: Bingo.

      Jan 16, 2010 at 1:45 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)
      John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)

      @Jeff:

      Jeff you have too much integrity and your words are too wise, rational and intelligent.

      You’ve not used your emotional side and you haven’t had preconceived notions.

      Plus you’ve made you post not about YOU and what YOU expect from people but HOW we can support them more…

      You’ve inc a solution.

      Not naming names but who many of the naysayers have?

      Jan 16, 2010 at 1:45 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)
      John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)

      @David Ehrenstein:

      Did you read my post?

      Do I agree?

      NO. NO. NO.

      As an activist I think EVERYONE should be fighting BUT like I said, I don’t believe it is right to dogmatically push my opinions or JUDGE people.

      So I’ll repeat myself again, I think considering his situation, Bomer behaved accordingly.

      Agree, don’t but don’t make NPH like some shining f*cking saviour.

      Jan 16, 2010 at 1:52 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Ehrenstein
      David Ehrenstein

      “I don’t believe it is right to dogmatically push my opinions or JUDGE people.”

      Pot Meet Kettle!

      “So I’ll repeat myself again, I think considering his situation, Bomer behaved accordingly.”

      Sure. According to the status quoe script. Being straight is so much a part of nature it’s like commenting on the sunshine. Being gay is a “private matter” that no one should talk about

      EVAH!

      Jan 16, 2010 at 2:03 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Colby412
      Colby412 [Different person #1 using similar name]

      PissedoffChristoph….You have restored my faith in younger gays. Great post! Stick to your guns and pass your thoughts and beliefs on to others of your generation.

      Jan 16, 2010 at 3:35 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Ehrenstein
      David Ehrenstein

      @PissedOffChristoph: SING OUT LOUISE!!!!!

      Jan 16, 2010 at 5:05 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Marc
      Marc

      Dear Ted:
      A person who works in the movie industry told me that when a very well-known TV actor came out, there was a lot of resentment in Hollywood for betraying the secret of the closeting system. Is this true? If an A-list movie star decides to come out, does he have to face not only the public reaction, but studio executives, producers and other fellow closeted actors given his back to him for breaking the silent pact of Hollywood and exposing its flaw?
      —Peter

      Dear Tough Choices:
      Yes. Now do you see why it’s so damn hard for these closeted actors to do it?

      http://www.eonline.com/uberblog/the_awful_truth/b162329_bitch-back_whats_sexy_skars_hiding.html

      Jan 16, 2010 at 5:56 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Ehrenstein
      David Ehrenstein

      If it weren’t for the closet Bruce Bibbie wouldn’t have a column to scribble in.

      Jan 16, 2010 at 6:30 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • ossurworld
      ossurworld

      Whatever happened to privacy? These shrill ‘outers’ have lives of little consequence; who cares if you’re out or in if you’re a nobody? It’s easy to be ‘out’ under those conditions. Public people may need to keep some things private. Too bad the concept of respect has been thrown ‘out’ by the screaming queens on the rooftops.

      Jan 16, 2010 at 6:57 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • uhaditcoming
      uhaditcoming

      Who keeps the closet alive? Gays. End of story.

      Jan 16, 2010 at 8:05 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Lukas P.
      Lukas P.

      Matt Bomer is an actor. He has a manager, a publicist, handlers, lawyers, etc. I wish, as said before, he did wonderful things for the gay communities, but we can’t discount the unknowns here: how much control does he have over an interview and the selected Q’s and A’s published from that interview? How much control do the handlers exercise over that? What do his contracts say about how interviews are set up, conducted and published? Does he contribute financially to LGBT organizations? [if you send a sizable check, request anonimity, and that request will be granted.]

      He didn’t say he was straight. He doesn’t have a “beard” or pretend to love some starlet. Guy has a job and a family to look out for. He’s still early enough in his career that his future is NOT secure. Maybe when it is more secure, he will come out and become a posterboy for the gay world.

      How long did it take for NPH and Ellen D to come out? They didn’t do so until their careers were on steady footing. Adam Lambert came out young, sure, but no one expects him to play a hetero guy on a TV show.

      Can we give him a little time and some breathing room?

      Jan 16, 2010 at 9:49 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jack Scribe
      Jack Scribe

      I agree with Lukas P. Many (probably most) gay men and women don’t wear a gay flag on their sleeves or are pre-occupied with gay issues. In my professional business life, being gay could have harmed advancement…it was just something I never discussed (nor hid, for that matter). Give Matt some slack.

      Jan 16, 2010 at 10:43 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)
      John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)

      @Marc:

      Great posting Marc.

      So true but sigh, these guys (commenters) don’t CARE.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 9:42 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Ehrenstein
      David Ehrenstein

      @Lukas P.: “Can we give him a little time and some breathing room?”

      No.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 10:03 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Ehrenstein
      David Ehrenstein

      @Jack Scribe: ” In my professional business life, being gay could have harmed advancement…it was just something I never discussed (nor hid, for that matter). ”

      “Could” have harmed” yet “just aomething I never discussed” PLUS “nor hid.”

      Make up you tine mind Miss Thing. And while you’re at it GROW A FUCKING PAIR!!!!!!

      Jan 17, 2010 at 10:05 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • uhaditcoming
      uhaditcoming

      Maybe he should engage in a triad and start dating Anderson Cooper. Then Bomer can go on “360” and talk about his new show.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 10:22 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • dpbfeb
      dpbfeb

      I don’t get it. If he comes out what is it going to do to for my life. A. I don’t think the majority of America even knows who he is so coming out wouldn’t make any news. B. Quite honestly it’s none of our business.

      I would understand if he was some right wing nut-job who yells out anti-gay rhetoric or even denies being gay and has a fake wife and chile, but he’s not. He’s a guy who’s chosen to be in a career where being out may not be beneficial. It’s a non issue.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 1:36 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TheAwfulTruth
      TheAwfulTruth

      @no. 88
      It IS an issue, otherwise we would not be debating it here.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 2:44 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • stunatra
      stunatra

      @Comeoutwhereveryouare: Bomer’s personal life is no one’s business but his. Why don’t you go and get a life of your own.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 3:25 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Ehrenstein
      David Ehrenstein

      @stunatra: OK, let me get yours. You obviously think it isn’t worth anything. I’ll put it up on “Craig’s List.”

      Jan 17, 2010 at 4:00 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Herb
      Herb

      @Marc: This goes for ossurworld, too. Oh, those Hollywood actors have it tough, but, guess what — so does everybody else. Being a Hollywood actor is not more difficult with your personal and professional life in coming out than it is for many other professions. And, Hollywood actors are no more deserving of special treatment than anyone else.

      While ossurworld may have a “[life] of little consequence.” I and many others do not.

      Again, it would be lovely to just simply be a person who happens to be gay, but that is not the world we currently live in.

      If you are an adult gay person in the U.S., you have a moral duty to come out and fight like the rest of us. To sit back while progress and rights for you to enjoy are made by others is unconscionable.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 4:27 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Herb
      Herb

      @dpbfeb: “I don’t get it. If he comes out what is it going to do to for my life.”…”It’s a non issue.”

      Wow! This could the most uninformed comment on a gay blog that I’ve ever seen.

      You really don’t get it. It matters that everybody comes out no matter their profession. This helps us all.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 4:41 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • kyle412
      kyle412

      For everyone who goes on and on about Bomer’s future…Shut up! The man is obviously in a relationship and his partner is a power player in Hollywood. Bomer won’t be homeless on the street if he were to come out. I guarantee you that his partner makes way over 6 figures and can provide for him and his family. God forbid Bomer didn’t become a superstar and make millions of dollars. How sad he would have be like most other Americans.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 8:55 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      @kyle412: God forbid that Bromer wants to earn his OWN money and not be a golddigger. And wants to be successful and have a great career.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 9:38 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • FedUp
      FedUp

      God forbid Bomer grows some balls and does what thousands of other gay people in this country do every year, struggling without the millions he has or is in the way of getting with his bf: come out as a proud gay man.
      Stay in the closet creep.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 10:09 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Po
      Po

      1. To the argument that as an actor he doesn’t have the right to privacy because he in essence gives it up by wanting to be in the public eye, I call BS. I saw Lea Michele at the Golden Globe awards she refused to say whether she wa in a realtionship or not. Want to jump all over her too.
      2. That he has some moral responsibility to be “out” to the public. Hmm, a slightly better argument but still flawed. First, he is out to the people that matter i.e. his friends and family and people he actually knows. Second, being out doesn’t necessarily mean one is helping the cause any more than anyone else. Who is helping the fight for gay rights more a party biy who constantly tells everyone they are gay or a person who leads a quiet life that stays educated on the issues that affect us and volunteers and/or donates to organizations that help gay people. Obviously this is an obtuse example, but you see my point.
      3. The only argument that really makes sense is the one for visibility.
      But to that point, I have to say I think it is less important tahn people think. I don’t buy the argument that having more out actors.musicians whatever the fuck will help gay rights in America. Most of those who are rallying against gay rights are so separated from Hollywood that I think they could care less

      Jan 17, 2010 at 10:20 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Po
      Po

      Also if he really wanted to be “in the closet” he could probably do a hell of a better job than living with an openly gay man and raising children…

      You guys say he doesn’t have to be an activist, but I think thats exactly what you want which is not a problem. I personally would like for him to be activist as well(I’d like everyone to be an activist). But at least be upfront about it.

      Don’t make the ridiculous claim that someone isn’t out until they hold a press conference about it or go on Ellen.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 10:33 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Herb
      Herb

      @Po: “out to the people that matter” would mean visibility to gay teens who are still at a disturbingly high rate of suicide.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 10:38 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Herb
      Herb

      BTW, being “out” in and of itself most certainly does mean one is helping “the cause.” Visibility is extremely important.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 10:43 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Po
      Po

      Obviously we are not going to agree on this, as by your previous posts you seem pretty set on what you believe.
      As I said,I agree that it would be better if every gay man or woman on the planet was out to Everyone.
      Where I take issue is the assertion that there is some sort of obligstion to do so. The obligation is to one’s self, becuase being closeted is like drinking a little poison every day of your life.
      In this case, that is not an issue as he is clearly out to people in his personal life.
      I just don’t see the point in him talking about being gay in an interview or whatever. He’s no t hiding. Anyone who cares to find out, can do do so quite easily.
      While I agree that visibility is important, I don’t think that most posters on here are that angry that he isn’t visible to gay teens(who probably wouldn’t care any way) The impression I get is that they are angry that he isn’t living his life on their terms. Whehter this is true or not, I can’t know as I (obviously) don’t know these people.

      “BTW, being “out” in and of itself most certainly does mean one is helping “the cause.” Visibility is extremely important”

      I agree that comment was directed at other posters who suggested as such.
      Also, by stating this you agree that even if he had answered yes I’m gay then went about his business you would not be satisfied correct? Or am I misinterpreting that

      Jan 17, 2010 at 11:02 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • kyle412
      kyle412

      @scott ny’er:

      If Bomer wanted to do it on his own he wouldn’t have settled down with a high powered Hollywood publicist.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 11:02 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • kyle412
      kyle412

      @Herb:

      1/3 of teen suicides are GLBT youth. Maybe that number would decrease if people lived their lives openly so that youth could see that we aren’t all Paul Lynde or Carson Kressley. Whether you are an actor, teacher or plumber living an open life and being visible makes a difference.

      Bomer doesn’t have to be an activist. NPH, TR Knight, Ellen, etc. all came out and aren’t activists. They are simply living their lives quietly and many Americans have changed their views on GLBT issues becauses they have more examples of gays.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 11:07 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Po
      Po

      Woops, misread that, ignore that last paragraph.

      However, I don’t think you fully read what I said, so I guess we’re even. I didn’t say being out to the public didn’t help. My point was that it is not the only way to do so and not the most effective either. There are many ways one can contribute to helping the lives of gay people the world over. That is why I think condemning this person for not purusing one avenus for doing so without knowing if what else he has done for gay people is a bit ridiculous and I think is a convenient argument for those that want him to do as they would do.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 11:12 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Po
      Po

      “many Americans have changed their views on GLBT issues becauses they have more examples of gays.”
      Obviously, we don’t have numbers on that one, but that may be wishful thinking on the part of many gay people. Prejudice has a strong hold on the mind.

      “They are simply living their lives quietly”
      Isn’t that exactly what Matt is doing, except unlike those three he didn’t do a People cover.
      He is out within his own community, among those that see him in his everyday life. Asking him to do more than that I think is asking him to be an activist. Which I have no problem with. But as I said, I don’t think he has a responsibility to do so.

      Jan 17, 2010 at 11:19 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      @Po: you said, “The impression I get is that they are angry that he isn’t living his life on their terms. Whehter this is true or not, I can’t know as I (obviously) don’t know these people.

      What you said, and your whole posts. Yay. Another voice of reason.

      Jan 18, 2010 at 1:06 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      @kyle412: clearly, we see people and the world differently. I think what you are saying doesn’t make any sense. Whatsoever.

      Jan 18, 2010 at 1:07 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)
      John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)

      @kyle412:

      “NPH, TR Knight, Ellen, etc.”

      All were outed.

      NPH and Ellen after decades of a succesful career and both are not leading men/women status.

      Use TR Knight as an example because he came out right when his career was hitting off in Greys Anatomy.

      And neither is he a leading man. Lets see how many roles Knight gets….last I heard dude was heading to Broadway..

      Ian McKellan? When he was 60…

      Who’s a good example to compare with Bomer? Cheyenne Jackson and guess what HE seems to think it has affected his career…

      Jan 18, 2010 at 8:51 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      @John from England(used to be just John but there are other John’s): Really? Cheyenne Jackson thinks it has affected his career? I hadn’t heard that. Interesting.

      Honestly, I don’t know how anyone can’t see that declaring he’s gay will be detrimental to his career. And additionally, it really isn’t anyone else’s business.

      Anyway, I think Cheyenne Jackson can’t be used either because he’s not a leading actor. Only on Broadway does he get leads. And we all know that Broadway is much different than TV or Motion Pictures.

      Jan 18, 2010 at 9:06 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)
      John from England(used to be just John but there are other John's)

      @scott ny’er:

      No I think he’s really good to use because remember that plane movie he was in? That was supposed to break him out as a leading actor.

      CJ actually goes on about it quite a lot and they are in the same predicament because they could be really fancied by women, they are hot and they both were already OUT in serious relationships, so couldn’t go back ‘in’.

      CJ faced similar pressure from the gay community, who equally bitched at him pretty badly. Remember Musto writting that piece in the Village Voice about how CJ has suddenly gone back ‘in’? And how CJ had to sack his publicist and than do that Advocate interview?

      Jan 18, 2010 at 9:23 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Ehrenstein
      David Ehrenstein

      @John from England(used to be just John but there are other John’s): See? Everyone should stay in the closet cause that’s the way you get “Leading Man Roles.”
      Such sage advice!

      Got Barry Diller on speed-dial John?

      Jan 18, 2010 at 10:33 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • LunarSoul
      LunarSoul

      Is this bitch Bomer a bottom? He looks it. He’s probably been passed around in one too many HOllywood orgies with the gay mafia. The mafia that keeps the closet alive.

      Jan 18, 2010 at 11:30 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • jimmy
      jimmy

      It’s not like these guys are selling office supplies. They are actors subject to the decisions of casting directors. An out gay man in Hollywood is pretty much pigeon holed into certain types of roles. That’s the business. Actors have the right to control their image as that is all they have in terms of the market.

      Jan 19, 2010 at 4:02 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • amtj2010
      amtj2010

      One, I just want to say all of you are ignorant. A openly gay man in hollywood has no career, stop citing NPH. He had a popular show years ago and was on a popular show before he came out. Lance bass and TR knight are not working. Lesbians like ellen are women, so hetero men think they still have a chance and women do not find them threatening. Also it is weird how most of you expect for people to be open in hollywood when their job is about playing characters. Yet a business man like a doctor or lawyer does not have to tell everyone they are gay. As the sister of a gay man, I am amazed that you want these people to be your activist and role models. I volunteer at GLBT center and I am sorry to inform you but even if every actor in hollywood came out gay that would not affect the suicide rates. Sexuality is personal, if more people worried about educating themselves and less about a “celebrities” life, then maybe change would happen. I have never counseled a teen that told me that “omg NPH is out, I do not want to kill myself any more”. A person that YOU DO NOT KNOW PERSONALLY does not affect you, you all would throw a fit if someone said the same shit to you.

      Jan 27, 2010 at 3:52 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Dan-o
      Dan-o

      Queerty, love you but please do a (better) job of fact-checking. Simon Halls resigned from PMK/HBH back in early December and joined Slate PR.

      Jan 27, 2010 at 4:40 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Mimi
      Mimi

      Wow. I’m reading these responses and I’m thinking, if MB wasn’t on this show, who would you get mad at for not coming out? As the best friend of a gay man, the sister of a gay man, and the cousin of a lesbian female, I have to say, I’m stunned.

      I’m not gay so I don’t know what it’s like to walk in a gay person’s shoes but I do know that judgment is placed in all aspects of their/your lives. I wish it wasn’t this way, but it is. Halls might want him to be quiet, USA might.

      What MB decides to do doesn’t affect anyone here. If he did come out in magazines, how would your world change?

      It wouldn’t. Does it matter if he comes out? Don’t get angry, I’d really like to know if his decision to not publicly run down the street telling people he’s gay is going to personally affect anyone other than him. This is his career, I think he’s trying to protect it.

      Jan 28, 2010 at 7:22 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • AKA
      AKA

      Just found an article about Simon Halls, his partner, posted in 2008. He made some comments on the Prop 8.

      http://www.thedailybeast.com/blogs-and-stories/2008-11-11/hollywoodrsquos-race/2/

      Jan 30, 2010 at 3:33 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Ehrenstein
      David Ehrenstein

      IT’S THE THREAD THAT WOULDN’T DIE!!!!!

      Feb 25, 2010 at 12:16 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Steve
      Steve

      What a coward and what pathetic apologists for him!

      He is not an actor first. He is, first and foremost, a partner and a father–apparently.

      He betrays both his partner and his child every time he pretends that they do not exist. I have zero respect for that self-centered cowardice. Why on earth would you bring a child into the closet! Will the child be taught how to lie for daddy about her other daddy?

      And as an openly gay professional for my entire adult life, I have no reluctance whatsoever about criticizing another gay man’s choice to hide in the closet. He has the right to make that choice, and I have every right to think and say he’s a self-centered coward. I have no obligation whatsoever to respect his closet.

      Mar 16, 2010 at 11:13 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • N.A.
      N.A.

      @JohnathanHasHadIt: Straight actors are asked multiple questions, and their children are stalked! Many children of known straight couples are followed to school, have their photos taken while at school. It’s not a double standard, it’s not that people aren’t allowed to ask him questions, it’s that he has the right to protect his privacy through whatever means. If he seems like an ass to some people while doing it, so what? He has said many times that he wants to keep his personal life private, that is his choice. Let him take this opportunity to protect the privacy of his children (if the rumors are true and he does have children). He has the right to lead HIS LIVE in a manner that he feels is right for him.

      Mar 20, 2010 at 4:34 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • N.A.
      N.A.

      @Steve: He has the right to live his life by his own standards. It’s pretty hilarious that you claim he’s betraying his partner, while by most evidence his publicist is his partner. It’s probably a course of action they’ve discussed, and agreed upon. You chose your course, and I applaud your decision, but he has the right to choose his own course. He shouldn’t have to live by the rules or the standards of anyone but his, and his family’s.

      Mar 20, 2010 at 4:36 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Glen
      Glen

      Here’s the bottom line (as I see it). To be a member of a minority group, then have the balls to turn around to said group and demand that they help you deny your minority status, while that group is fighting for their very right to exist, so that you can pursue fame, fortune, and a hot husband, is a bunch of bullshit. And, it’s a losing battle.

      Unfortunately, I feel that this guys’ reps are woefully behind the times, and will screw him out of the career he could have had with these stupid head games they are playing with a hard working public that they feel is so beneath them.

      I could be wrong, and good luck with that.

      Glen

      Jul 15, 2010 at 5:56 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Christina
      Christina

      Why are all of the hot guys either a jerk, happily married, or gay ? Man….. :/

      Aug 21, 2010 at 9:40 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John
      John

      It’s pretty messed-up how so many people commenting here are upset that Matt Bomer is not completely out of the closet. For whatever reason, he’s either not ready yet or does not want to. It’s not like he’s saying derogatory things about gay people and the gay community. Just because he’s famous, why does he have to shoulder such a responsibility of representing all gay people?

      In this day and age, our community has enough positive role models representing us, in all different industries. We don’t need to pressure those not ready yet to come out of the closet, just so they can represent us.

      It’s funny how on one hand, so many of us gay folks want people to live by the motto of “live and let live” when dealing with us, but yet these same people want to dictate how others should be living their lives.

      Sep 21, 2010 at 1:04 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • RLK
      RLK

      It is great to see men that are gay playing mainstream roles as this as Matt Bomer is doing. Regardless of the money, the fame, and any other insignificant elements, one has to be true to oneself. Matt has a husband and children and with this comes major responsibility in teaching honesty and integrity to your children. Is he dishonest? No. Is he disingenious? Yes. Because we need gay men like this to be role models and for gay men to own their masculinity through accurate and real potrayls. We have too many Kurts (Glee) on TV and not enough Matts (White collar). I would love to see him be out and proud. Some things are more important than fame. I assume he loves his family very much and is doing what he feels is right. However, his kids should apologize for their dads who do fully acknowledge who they are. I am sure they are a wealthly couple as Simon Halls is quite successful in his own right. Anyway, I wish them much success in life and keep it together.

      Jan 13, 2011 at 1:58 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • A K Augusta
      A K Augusta

      Eggs-actly! I’m 88, short, almost bald, limp a lot, have crooked teeth, scars on face and stomach, don’t speak good, but I like all people (unless they are murderers or hurt kids or animals) There! I’m out! Matt is what he is — why does it bother people? What difference does it make to them? Scratch my head — I can’t understand it. Go White Collar!

      Feb 23, 2011 at 1:52 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Kat Caffery
      Kat Caffery

      White Collar is an amazing show that appeals to a lot of people, its true. But lets face it, the primary audience is female and on the younger side. Compared to most other shows of its kind, White Collar is really pretty safe. The violence is minimal, the cursing is virtually nonexistent, and the crimes are typically nothing much to have to stomach. Where does the show step out a bit? The random shirtless and kissing scenes. Matt Bomer may be gay, but Niel Caffery is the perfect straight guy. Girls love him, and don’t want to digest the fact that he’s gay. If he were to be too open, people who weren’t looking for it would find it, and the show would lose money as the ad companies realized the ratings were falling.
      Secondly, has anyone asked his family if they want to be in the public eye before accusing him of betraying them? A lot of celebrities keep their personal lives hidden, not everyone is Angie and Brad. Matt seems like a good guy, and we should support him in his choices. Just because a certain decision is the bold one doesn’t make it the right one.

      Mar 5, 2011 at 2:35 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • OrchidIslander
      OrchidIslander

      I wonder how supportive all the gay men clamoring for Matt to “come out” would be – if he actually made some gay approved out statement, and lost his job; mangled his career and probably never worked again as an actor at his current level.

      What a trade off! How happy he would be! Satisfy the gay gestapo – go broke and be unemployed!

      At least he could wave that gay pride flag all the way to the unemployment office, because none of you hyper critical bitches would ever consider putting your money where your mouth is.

      Want gay television actors to come out? Start, and donate to, a fund to support them in the manner that they used to be accustomed to when they do so.

      Its his life; his choice and he has the right to live it in whichever fashion that pleases him.

      Honestly, such concern over a television actor. Some of you obviously need lives of your own.

      Mar 5, 2011 at 4:42 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jeanne
      Jeanne

      All I have to say from a girl’s prospective-what a shame. (-:) He is georgeous! Leave the Guy alone. The show is great, that’s all that matters.

      Mar 6, 2011 at 8:11 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • s.a.
      s.a.

      dis guy is da whole package and ruins it by being gay!He is a BRILLIANT ACTOR but really?

      Mar 7, 2011 at 5:50 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • douchebag2k11
      douchebag2k11

      @jeanne:
      Maybe you’re a desperate, illusionary hag who never ever accept a fact

      Mar 23, 2011 at 10:51 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Chris
      Chris

      So in other words, you’re not going to accept him until he openly announces that he’s gay? Isn’t that just as close minded as people bagging him if he actually decided to be fully open about it? What he chooses to do with his like is his choice. Way too many actors get labeled for their social life, shouldn’t you debate on your opinions of his acting, rather than his sexuality? I couldn’t care less if he is gay or not, if he’s more comfortable with keeping it to himself, then you shouldn’t force it upon someone to come out before they are well and ready, even of everyone knows it already or not.
      Why would you hate on an amazing actor?
      -Chris

      Jun 13, 2011 at 11:22 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Adali
      Adali

      As an “out of the closet” gay myself, I can say from experience announcing to the world that “you are gay” is not an easy task. I totally understand Matt Bomer’s reason for wanting to be private about his sexuality. The sad thing is much of the American public still doesn’t accept LGBTs; it’s sort of the last frontier of human rights in the US right now. And for someone who has his career depending on his ability to act as a suave, charming, and very straight man it’s a hard thing to do. Of course people like Neil Patrick Harris have come out and are still loved but Matt isn’t quite at Neil’s acclaim. Bomer although pretty successful still has a bit to go in order to solidify his place in Holywood. I would hope Bomer would one day get the balls to come out and declare that he’s gay and openly help the community, but for now let the guy keep his privacy. Things like this take time. You have to feel confident and ready to take down the haters before you can go announcing your sexuality in this world.

      Jun 14, 2011 at 5:40 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • lisa hoffhein
      lisa hoffhein

      i think about matt bomer being gay is if he is happy about being it then y do we care all i care about is if he is happy in his life but i still think he is smoking hot! and if he is happy then im happy !!!!!!! ? ?????????

      Jun 22, 2011 at 2:17 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • lisa hoffhein
      lisa hoffhein

      in my last comment i did not mean ? i ment harts ?

      Jun 22, 2011 at 2:18 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • lisa hoffhein
      lisa hoffhein

      idc if matt is gay he is a awsome person to think you hate him just because of that is stuped y would u think that he is so awsome and hot HOT HOT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love matt for who he is. not what gender he like he is so cool if u give him a chance and i say he is awsome and i have never mett him y should you hate him for one cork dont be a jerk to him because of that
      i love u Matt Bomer

      Jun 22, 2011 at 2:23 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • VC
      VC

      Gay. Straight. Does it really matter? What is this need everyone has for gay and lesbian actors/actresses to stand up and shout from the rooftops, “YES! I’M GAY!” Its none of our business, and the only reason the gay community wants a celebrity to come out of the closet is for their own justification. “See…they’re gay, and everyone loves them and they’re successful…so its okay for me to be gay, too.” Being a gay celebrity doesn’t mean they HAVE to stand up and wave the rainbow flag and take up arms in the fight for LGBT rights. Yes, it helps to have public figures on our side…but it is not necessary. If Matt wants to keep his private life private, let him. Its not for us to tell him he’s wrong.

      Jun 29, 2011 at 2:39 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • rishab
      rishab

      chill out. stop worrying about his life and worry about yours. stupid ass niggas

      Jul 11, 2011 at 11:25 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Neph
      Neph

      @Comeoutwhereveryouare: Why does he have to do something for the gay community? Does he have to prove himself in order to officially be gay? No. He’s busy, he has a whole show on his shoulders, not to mention interviews, memorizing lines, applying for other roles, etc. etc. It’s not easy being an actor, you know. And apparently he has a lot of stuff going on in his personal life, so give the guy a break.

      Jul 19, 2011 at 1:28 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • RL
      RL

      As a straight guy, this did change my perspective on the show.

      Matt Bomer isn’t just playing any character, he’s playing the lead role as an extremely charming womanizer that all the girls want and all the (straight) guys want to be like.

      You can’t underestimate how much of the show’s success is due to the character’s hyper-successful heterosexual appeal.

      Even though he’s just an actor playing a fictional character, a TV show is only as good as the suspension of disbelief it creates.

      Straight men who watch want to identify with the Neal character. That becomes difficult when you learn that the actor playing him is actually gay.

      Straight women are attracted to the Neal character. That would probably change in many cases if they learn that the actor is gay.

      Finding out that the super-straight playboy is played by a gay actor definitely interferes with the suspension of disbelief necessary to enjoy the show.

      Now when I see Neal making out with some Barbie on the show, I think, “But he’s gay.”

      I’d say his PR people are correct in keeping his private life just that. Private.

      The show would probably lose a lot of draw with heterosexual viewers if he went around announcing his homosexuality in every interview.

      Jul 27, 2011 at 2:14 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • RL
      RL

      After reading the comments on here, it seems that a lot of the posters want to deny nature and reality.

      The majority of men are straight. Straight men find male homosexuality to be a turn off. That’s reality, and that’s never going to change.

      Why are gay men attracted to other men? Because they’re wired that way.

      Why are straight men turned off by male homosexuality? Because they’re wired that way.

      Saying there’s some sort of societal conspiracy to make heterosexuality the norm, is like saying oceans conspire against land animals, or that land conspires against fish.

      Jul 27, 2011 at 3:42 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • molly shepherd
      molly shepherd

      WHO CARES if Matt is gay or straight?? I don’t care if he likes livestock! He’s a breathtakingly handsome, compelling and accomplished actor. His personal preferences are no one’s business but his own. He’s a hunk, gang–let’s just enjoy watching him and quit prying!

      Jul 28, 2011 at 7:08 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • RL
      RL

      “WHO CARES if Matt is gay or straight?”

      It makes a difference in that it interferes with the suspension of disbelief required to enjoy a show. Imagine if they cast Paris Hilton as a genius savant. There’s a reason Matt Bomer and the network have been quiet about the issue.

      “I don’t care if he likes livestock!”

      Really?

      Jul 29, 2011 at 12:34 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • AJ
      AJ

      well i kind of agree that it might change one’s perception on the womanizing, heterosexual character he plays, so it might be better to keep his personal life on the quiet side.
      at the same time, i believe that the people saying that he should be out more or that he is still in the closet are ridiculously wrong. just because You want to show you’re gay to everyone else doesn’t mean that’s what every other gay personal wants to do. he already has a s.o. so he’s not trying to impress anyone. he doesn’t need to attach a rainbow pin to his shirt and wear it around all the time to announce his sexual preference. that’s what it seems like y’all want him to do, and it’s completely unnecessary. we know he’s gay. cool. that’s done with. he’s out. so you needn’t say he’s not out of the closet and that he’s not being “gay enough” for you. let him live his life how he wants to. let him deal with his personal life how he wants to.

      Aug 7, 2011 at 11:59 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • MK_Ultra_Again
      MK_Ultra_Again

      @RL: You speak for yourself, of course. because in reality, gay men have played womanizng characters before, like Neil Patrick Harris.The show would not lose any viwers if he came out. Only in your homophobic mind. Fact – the world doesn’t revolve around straight men and what they want. Get over it.If you define your heterosexuality by being turned off by male homosexuality, then maybe you aren’t so heterosexual.

      Aug 8, 2011 at 12:34 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • cherrylimb
      cherrylimb

      I just think he’s sexy as hell, don’t really care about his personal preferences, I can still LOOK!!!!!

      Aug 16, 2011 at 1:33 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Comeoutwhereveryouareisafaggot
      Comeoutwhereveryouareisafaggot

      Hey Comeoutwhereveryouare have you done anything productive with your life like helpin out the people in Haiti? No I didnt think so, so shut the fuck up and how the fuck would you even know if he hasnt helped them out or anything else huh? No you dont know so do us all a favor and shut the fuck up

      Aug 25, 2011 at 3:11 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Mark
      Mark

      @MK_Ultra_Again

      “Fact – the world doesn’t revolve around straight men and what they want.”

      Actually, the success of a show where the leading character is a heterosexual womanizer does depend on the approval of the majority straight male audience.

      That’s like saying Vegas nightclubs are supposed to be politically correct and inclusive, instead of selecting for attractive women and men with disposable income. Uh, no.

      Don’t be intellectually dishonest, you know very well that Neil Patrick Harris “came out” in 2006, which was what, 13 years after the success of Doogie Howser? His success had already been well established enough that he could afford to be honest.

      And no, male heterosexuality is not defined by being turned off by male homosexuality. It just so happens that most straight men are repulsed by male homosexuality, but that is not a conditional premise of being a straight man.

      Think of it like ugly people. Are ugly people normal people? Of course. Is there any reason to hate ugly people? No. And besides, beauty and ugliness are subjective concepts, there is no objective standard.

      But does the public want to see two “ugly people” make out? Hell no.

      Just like if the straight male White Collar audience saw the pictures of the leading actor French kissing some guy, most would be repulsed.

      They don’t hate gays (nor ugly people), it’s just something they personally find repulsive. End of story.

      And it’s not just straight guys. Much of the show’s appeal also depends on straight women being attracted to Matt Bomer, but most straight women would not continue to be attracted to a guy they know is gay.

      It’s that simple. Let the man run his career as he sees fit.

      Aug 29, 2011 at 12:26 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • debra
      debra

      matt chose to be an actor,now his life is an open book. he has no personal life now.

      Sep 24, 2011 at 1:09 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • nikola
      nikola

      i could say this is “cyberbullying”

      poor you matt… :(

      Sep 25, 2011 at 8:03 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Marios
      Marios

      you people are all pathetic!! So what if Matt comes out publicly or not, it’s his life and not yours, he has a great and successful show riding on is shoulders. Grow up and stop judging, no wonder straight people hate us, and yes I am gay too but don’t go around advertising the fact!!!

      Nov 18, 2011 at 7:11 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jim Horn
      Jim Horn

      All I know is he is fun to watch as is the other cast of White Collar and I hope he is as happy in his private life as he makes me in watching him act. Being an actor is a profession he does well, being gay is his life let him do that also well in private as I do.

      Nov 24, 2011 at 2:56 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Ronja
      Ronja

      It’s sad that “is he or is he not…” still is a question in this country.
      In Germany the Secretary of State is openly gay (he’s married to his partner who accompanies him to state banquetts etc.) and nobody cares…

      Nov 30, 2011 at 8:58 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • jennifer
      jennifer

      i dont care if he is gay or not..he is still hot!!! lol and i love white collar…him and the others are all great actors! thats all that matters..magazines are always trying to uncover what there is not..people who read blogs, articles, etc. and actually believe it all, well, i feel sorry that you have no life. lol

      Dec 2, 2011 at 10:57 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • torepedo
      torepedo

      Listen up all you jealous people-
      Why all this negativity about this handsome guy who just wants to be left alone and be credited for his acting abilities and not his sexual orientation. He doesn’t owe anyone anything and it’s pathetic that people want him to be role models for the gay population. Who deemed him the savior of all humanity. He is just a simple good looking guy who wants his personal life be kept private which is not too much to ask. All this animosity towards him from gay people just brings out more hatred. How can we all live together and have people respect gay people when we don’t respect each other. No wonder there is so much hatred in this society, gay can’t even tolerate and respect other gay people’s opinions and lives. Why should we all waive a flag saying that we’re gay, what point does it do nowadays since we all know that gay exist. What are we fighting for but to fight? Leave this guy alone and let him live the life he wants to live, not what other gay people thinks he should live! Jealousy and hatred will bring us all down!! You go Matt, live your life and don’t care what other gay people say about you!

      Dec 27, 2011 at 3:35 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Bryan
      Bryan

      @torepedo: Pointless bump of an old topic with a comment that’s not saying anything that hasn’t been said 154 comments prior.

      Dec 27, 2011 at 3:54 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jess
      Jess

      @Bryan: But still needs to be said since the old queens piss and moan so much about his coming out. Sad they need the validation in their lives of a star coming out. Matt is perfection, lives his life openly. I love that he doesn’t plainly say it, it drives the old queens crazy.

      Dec 29, 2011 at 10:11 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Joe
      Joe

      I’m not gay, but what is it about gay people that they feel the need to be treated differently? Why the f*ck does Matt Bomer have to do anything for the gay community? You don’t hear straight people saying shit like this. Matt Damon has done nothing for the straight community. Do you realize how frickin’ stupid that sounds.

      When you gay people get off of the stupid “community” shit and stop expecting gay celebrities to do something for the so-called gay community, then you will be taken seriously. But the fact is this “community” and “gay pride” shit is ridiculous. I’ll never understand the need for gay people to stand out and shout their sexuality. We don’t care. Just be gay. There’s no need to have parades or a community. Just be gay and treat people with respect, which means not shoving the fact that you’re gay in other people’s face or expecting other gay people to do something for you.

      Jan 11, 2012 at 1:47 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Taylor
      Taylor

      Just a point: Every single person that is gay/lesbian in the world is not going to stand in the street with a sign proclaiming their sexuality. That makes no sense. It would be like having everyone in the U.S. wear something that says whether they are straight or gay. Sure, it’s a little sad that Bomer won’t tell us all about his personal life. It’s sad that he can’t be openly gay. But what happened to free will?? The motto of the United States. What happened to letting people do their own thing?? I certainly don’t broadcast every detail of my life and I’m sure there really aren’t that many people who do. (Cheers if you are.) But that’s OKAY because it’s his decision when he comes out, how he comes out, and how he feels on the subject in general. If he regrets that he wasn’t openly gay earlier in life, should we prosecute him for it?? No, we should respect his choices. Whether they’re wrong or right or whether or not we agree with him.

      @Joe “Why the f*ck does Matt Bomer have to do anything for the gay community? …. Matt Damon has done nothing for the straight community.”
      ^Love it.

      Jan 14, 2012 at 7:21 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Nadu
      Nadu

      I firmly believe Bonner was put on this planet to give my eyes joy. I don’t care if he has orgys with horses. He’s gorgeous and makes my heart clap.

      Jan 16, 2012 at 4:49 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Bob
      Bob

      He does a great job on White Collar, and just finished a good role in a Steven Soderberg – directed film coming out in June. Who cares about all of this other junk. He’s in a hit tv show, is happy, is making $$. Everything else with the press mongers and idiots running around LA and NY – is irrelevant. We need to eradicate the sleazy press folks. they are UNNECESSARY in this world. Total SLeaze and vermine

      Jan 17, 2012 at 2:13 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Violet
      Violet

      Why is his sexual orientation such a huge deal to everyone? He’s gay and I actually give him props for not blabbing it to the entire world constantly. Most people have a problem with weapon-wording their pride, until they actually alienate themselves from the matter entirely. Straight people don’t go around yelling out how straight they are. There’s no holiday or parade celebrating a person being straight. You don’t have to be ashamed of what orientation you are or have the lack of pride in it. Straight people keep relationship life private to you know. The thing is, if the homo community want’s to be like “everyone else”. Than love is all you need and it’s no one else’s business. People will understand, other’s wont. Matt doesn’t need to change or express a thing. He has a happy life and it’s his life. Therefore no one else’s business but his own. Gay, straight, somewhere in-between. Love is love, every orientation has fallen into it before. No reason to invade each other and ask about “what you are”. Love is everyone. ;O

      Jan 18, 2012 at 3:48 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • thisisgoofey
      thisisgoofey

      I was searching for white collar information about the show and was sad to find this page.
      You are talking about a persons sexuality which is part of a persons private life… and should stay private!!! Both GAY and Straight should keep their sexuality private. I believe in coming out of the closet but keep it private and behind closed doors. I am so tired of meeting someone for the first time and they just blurt out I’m gay! or I’m introduced to someone “this is my gay friend so in so”. I don’t care if you are Gay or straight!!! People who have the need to know a strangers sexuality or to share their sexuality with strangers are sick and need help!!! a persons personal life is none of our business!!!

      Jan 24, 2012 at 4:51 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • thisisgoofey
      thisisgoofey

      wow, no wonder people are so messed up today when the best help you can give them is to teach them their identity and self worth is their sexuality!!!

      The women’s movement has spent over a hundred years trying to stop this and the Gay movement is undoing it!!!

      Someone who is interested in a strangers personal or sex life is not healthy and should seek treatment!!!

      We have all met these people, The Gossip, The Trouble maker, The Stalker!!!

      These people rather than having their own healthy fulfilled lives, they live other peoples lives!!!

      Jan 24, 2012 at 2:35 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jora
      Jora

      Matt is the best kind of eye candy. I don’t care if he’s gay. In fact, it kind of adds to his hotness. I am female, by the way.

      Jan 29, 2012 at 9:48 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • rahrah
      rahrah

      damn. i was just hoping he was straight so i can fantasize about him… *sigh*
      but to everybody who’s criticizing him, suck a big gay cock. why should it mean so much to you about his PERSONAL life?

      Jan 30, 2012 at 3:28 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • ThomasBHills
      ThomasBHills

      How far our world has fallen… everything is so screwed up now- it’s just unbelievable. I personally think that while people may have these… urges… that they should just keep it to themselves and try to work past them. I have no problem with people having their own opinion of things but I do not agree with homosexuality and I’d personally prefer to have people keep their sex lives to themselves. It’s a personal matter and shouldn’t be shouted through a megaphone at the public.

      Feb 6, 2012 at 8:55 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Leslie
      Leslie

      SenorEspada…a talented actor is a talented actor. It’s not define by what network his show is currently on…so you don’t know what you’re talking about. He’s a rising star and will be known outside of USA network (a great network BTW)…and outside USA (even now that’s true).

      NoDoubleStandards … It’s all positive, don’t think so negative. Because of Matt, my eyes are more aware of gay/lesbian issues than before. I tell my kids how unfair prop 8 is, that Ellen and Portia are married, support the fight #NOH8, #freetomarry, participate in AidsWalk, just to name a few. He’s also being honor with the Steve Chase Humanitarian Award.

      Support Matt, don’t criticize.

      Feb 9, 2012 at 12:29 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Tim O'Sullivan
      Tim O'Sullivan

      Can I just say, does it really matter whether hes gay or straight, hes a human being who has the right to be whatever he wants to be, hes seems happy in his personal life, as he states himself, hes a great actor and white collar is a great show, so hes not openly telling everyone or for his own reasons doesnt come out in an interview, big deal, i think its crazy that in this day and age we are still making such a deal about ‘gay’ people, they have souls, they have minds, they have hearts like the rest of us, no arguments with anyones comments, this is just my opinion

      Mar 2, 2012 at 8:25 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • bluedaughter
      bluedaughter

      I do not understand why anyone gives a rat’s behind about who is or who is not gay in Hollywood, or anywhere else for that matter. Why do people care? Yes,….I did read the article. What I cannot stand is when on the cover of People magazine (and other magazines too, I am just using People magazine as an example) there is a famous someone’s picture with the headline “I am Gay”. So what!? And why are there Gay Pride parades? Do people organize for a Heterosexual Pride parade? I am really serious here in that I do not understand the need for people to announce their sexual preference. A person’s sexual orientation should be their own personal business. Would someone please enlighten me? Thank you all in advance for your comments, no matter which way they should go.

      Apr 9, 2012 at 11:27 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • bluedaughter
      bluedaughter

      @thisisgoofey: I agree

      Apr 9, 2012 at 11:32 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John M.
      John M.

      Most of these comments exemplify exactly why I generally detest and despise so-called “gay culture”. Being gay does not define me, nor should it define anyone else. Yes, it’s part of my identity, but it isn’t the first, second, or even third-most important defining characteristic. It doesn’t shape my interests, my behavior, my profession, or anything else about me other than who I am attracted to and love.

      There are many straight actors who refuse to discuss their personal lives with the press. The only reason that Bomer is being singled out here is because he is, presumably, gay. Grow up. You people are setting back gay rights every time you whine because “Insert presumed gay person here” doesn’t act like the stereotype you’ve decided all gay people are supposed to be.

      Please, feel free to STFU at any point. No one cares. Go live your little ghetto lives where you pretend that the rest of the world doesn’t exist. Those of us who live our lives without excuse or the need to proclaim ourselves will be busy doing more for gay rights than you whinging prats ever well.

      Guess what…the number one thing that makes people reconsider prejudice is open, normal interaction with a member of the group in question. Stereotypes who spend most of their lives retreating to the local gay ghetto just reinforce the incorrect assumptions of other people. I’ve done more to advance the cause of gay rights simply by being a gay man interacting normally with straight people than anyone who pretends there’s a difference between the “straight world” and the “gay world”.

      Maybe Bomer is doing the same thing. Either way – I don’t care. You people annoy me. Join the world, don’t hide away, safe among the drag queens, etc. Man up. I’m a gay MAN, not a woman with a dick.

      Apr 30, 2012 at 10:57 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • A.C.
      A.C.

      When I first saw the picture of Matt and his boyfriend , I thought it was just two pictures of Matt.. They look almost exactly the same.. So, Matt must be one of these typical gay narcissistic young cunts who will only date other cunts who look almost like themselves… so f*cking ridiculous…who the hell wants to date their twin brother or cousin?

      Jun 12, 2012 at 9:22 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • your face
      your face

      For fucks sake, people. Do we really have nothing better to do than to bitch about a hollywood actor being a homosexual? Just let them do what they do and you can do whatever it is that you do. You people make me fucking sick. Get a fucking life, you piece of shit losers.

      Jul 2, 2012 at 10:01 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Faith
      Faith

      U say tht Bomer got this far because of his connections, but they can only take u so far. Sure u need some connections to get u on the right track, but u also have to have some talent in order to stay on the right track, because even though u have all these connections, if you are terrible in acting then you’re screwed. But Bomer has some real talent and his looks kind of gave him a jumpstart cause he is the kind of guy that could pass off as an actual conman, I know he got me fooled. Anyways what you should judge him by is his acting, and who he is as a real person. It doesn’t matter who he takes to the bedroom with him and its sure as hell not the public’s business. No matter who Matt Bomer is into, he is still my favorite actor and I will always stand by him.

      Aug 7, 2012 at 4:13 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jo
      Jo

      It’s his life, his business. Do you want someone coming into your home with cameras and microphones and stupid questions that are no one else’s business. It’s a sad world we live in when our society looks to HOLLYWOOD for the answers. Those people were regular Joes like us who just happened to get on screen and so now we’re supposed to look up to them for insight on fashion, beauty, weight, and most importantly political and personal issues??? Really people…think about it…did 99% of Hollywood go to college and study these subjects? Have they studied psych? NO! They’re you, me, the person next door who got a big break. Get your star struck head out of their glistening a** and find real people who live in your community, who you can work together with personally on such important issues and let those Hollywood ding bats live their lives the way they want as you do yours.

      May 20, 2014 at 1:00 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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