DOUBLE SPEAK

Why The Hell Does Michelle Rodriguez Say She’s Straight When She’s Constantly Making Out With Chicks?

Despite having sexual relationships with women, actress Michelle Rodriguez is adamant that she is not a lesbian. As she emphatically put it earlier this year, “Mitchie likes sausage.” (Yes, that’s a third-person reference to herself as “Mitchie” and a euphemism for dicks in the same sentence. Perhaps you’d like to see it on camera for the full effect.)

We aren’t fooled by such trickery. In fact, we have stopped listening to Michelle’s statements a long time ago, and preferred to believe photographic evidence.

Radar Online recently spotted her on holiday with a ladyfriend in Pervero Beach, Porto Cervo. While this isn’t the first time we’ve seen Michelle frolicking with women in a more-than-friends fashion, it just reminds us how annoying it is that Michelle continues to go on an “I’m not a lesbian” publicity tour.

Listen, Mitchie, you can like your sausage and your vagina euphemisms, too. We know you were pissed when Curve put you on their cover and touted your interview as being a “coming out” story, but seriously, we don’t need to hear how much you love men in overcompensation. Instead of thinking you’re straight, we just find you irritating and internally homophobic.

Do you kiss your girlfriend with that mouth of yours?

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