We used to think Ted Nugent was like a crossbow-wielding Gary Busey: not right in the head but basically harmless. He must be going off his meds, though, because lately the rural rocker has been getting crazier—and scarier.
First the “Cat Scratch Fever” singer cryptically predicted he’d “either be dead or in jail by this time next year” if President Obama was re-elected. Now he’s delivered a bizarre on-air vow, telling CBS News’ Jeff Glor “I’ll suck your d**k,” if Glor could prove Nugent wasn’t a nice guy.
“I’m an extremely loving and passionate man. And people who investigate me honestly, without the baggage of political correctness, ascertain the conclusion that I’m a damn nice guy. If you can find a screening process more powerful than that I’ll suck your d**k.
In our circles, oral definitely puts you in the “nice” category but we’d be scared Nugent would bite off our junk with his teeth and make some kind of bear trap with it.
It was almost a year ago that Nugent discussed with CNN’s Piers Morgan what he would do if one of his kids came out as gay.
“I’d say, ‘Get the gun, lets go kill a deer—[“it’s] inconsequential,” he tells Morgan. “I’m repulsed at the concept of man-on-man sex. I think it’s against nature—I think it’s strange as hell. But if that’s what you are, I love you.”
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Um, thanks Dad?
Rosada Delano
Have you seen a photo of Jeff Glor. Gosh, he’s a real young cutie. I seriously doubt he would entertain the thought of crazy Ted “Turd Nugget” Nugent’s mouth on his tallywhacker! If I was Jeff Glor i would be very scared and run in the opposite direction!
Richard Ford
Gruesome prospect, but still, a step or two above getting a blow job from a piranha.
jack jett
The media will make this guy into the next Sarah Palin. They just eat this shit up.
Lightning Baltimore
Ted could always just remove his dentures to allay any fears of penectomy that Mr. Glor may have.
Jarrod
Ted Nugent: Still somehow less objectionable to the GOP than Common.
Hi There I'm Tom
He’s absolutely repulsive in almost every way, except, I like Stranglehold 😛
Of course he’s a mostly ignorant redneck, but what he said about a hypothetical gay child is miles and miles better than what his peers would say. I’m willing to bet many of the people that are “allies” of the gay community find gay sex repulsive as well. I am also equally repulsed at the thought of Ted Nugent mounting some herpe ridden groupie, so all is still well in the kingdom.
Being ‘repulsed’ by something can and does change over time. He’s already fully accepted a child that may be homosexual. That’s already much more enlightened than most of his redneck brood.
Mr. Enemabag Jones
I’m repulsed at the concept of man-on-man sex. I think it’s against nature—I think it’s strange as hell.
Man on little girl sex though, he’s all for it.
D P
Um, when it comes to Jeff Glor, I’d suck him if the sun would set.
Kenover
Heck, Jeff Glor wouldn’t have to prove anything to get me to blow him.
Delius
This man enjoys torturing animals.
He is the lowest life from on earth.
Marie Cohn
I am ahead of Nugent in the line to suck Jeff Glor’s dick.
Mk_ultra_again
“I’m repulsed at the concept of man-on-man sex”
As study after study after study after study! has shown us, he probably actually secretly find the idea of male-male sex sexually stimulating.
Straight men, get over it. You are curious of male-male sex. No on believes the squeak wheel “Oh it’s gross” anymore. Either acknowlegde it and move on, or maybe try experimenting.
Stop degrading gay men because we do what you want to do but can’t, or won’t.
Hyhybt
@Mr. Enemabag Jones: Where do you get that from?
Mr. Enemabag Jones
@Hyhybt:
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2012/04/18/1084534/-Romney-has-a-Pedophile-Problem-Named-Ted-Nugent-
Lightning Baltimore
The GOP does seem to love their serial adulterers, don’t they? I mean, you know, so long as they’re adulterous with folks of the opposite sex, of course.
Hyhybt
@Mr. Enemabag Jones: Ugh.
Thanks for the link, though. I hadn’t heard that before… and, as you may have noticed, there are a lot of people on the internet, especially in blog comment areas, who like to throw things like pedophile accusations simply because they don’t like someone.
Clockwork
Can’t you people just rock n’ roll and have some fun?
Noooooo, because everything in the world is either for us or against us, and if it’s against us….We hate it! Hate it! Hate it!
Stop anyone, anything, any sound, that does not promote all that we say and believe!
Long live freedom and equality!
Nicki
Mr. Enemabag Jones what’s your point? Harvey Milk was a chickenhawk and liked underage teenage boys which is just as bad.
Lightning Baltimore
@Clockwork: The Nuge is against our freedom and equality.
With The Amboy Dukes and up through his third solo album, Cat Scratch Fever, he was pretty much unstoppable. Unfortunately, he chose to follow that with 35 years now of crap music and horrific politics.
Fuck him.
So true!
Haha I agree Clockwork.
jason
Most angry conservative men are ultimately seduceable. I knew one. You start by rubbing the backs of their necks gently. After emitting a few softs sighs, you know they’ll be putty in your hands.
jason
In fact, I would go so far as to say that angry conservative men are the best lovers. It’s the anger, sweetie. Anger is a great aphrodisiac.
Mr. Enemabag Jones
@Nicki:
Nicki, you’ve posted this comment on Queerty several times, and never provided a link with facts to back up your opinion. Please do so, or shut-up.
ChristopherM
I wouldn’t hit that with Jason’s dick.
Clockwork
@Lightning Baltimore:
>Unfortunately, he chose to follow that with 35 years now of crap music and horrific politics.
>Fuck him.
Yes!, I agree, we must stop Ted Nugent.
I will soon publish a list of rock and roll clubs (with pool tables) that the GLBT community needs to boycott.
Everyone listens to the Nuge, he can sway this election, he promotes hate. He kills deer, next thing you know they will kill us…burn your Nuge vinyl records!
GLAAD -> Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Deer-Hunting:
Will stop this Red-State demagogue, before his attitude spreads to the dangerous Republican populace.
BlogShag
“Ok, get on your knees, man bitch.” You’re still quite hot Ted. I’d suck yours in a heartbeat 😉
I wish these silly news anchor men and women would stop acting like they’re shocked. Ted lives in the real world. Do they?
Ogre Magi
@Clockwork: Hey, the man killed a ghost once! There is no telling what else he could do http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbEieKQ27NI
Boyd
Jason go ahead and do that.
Everyone else who doesn’t have a death wish will stay far away from people like that since we don’t want to get bashed.
kendoll
Is Ted Nugent relevant?
Lightning Baltimore
@Clockwork:
You sure seem to be reading a lot into what I wrote that isn’t there.
Are we supposed to give Ted a pass on stuff like attacking our community and making veiled threats to assassinate Obama just because he used to be a good musician?
How the fuck do you extrapolate disliking the asinine statements of “Lousy Ted” (formerly known as “Terrible Ted,” when he still had some talent) to boycotting “rock and roll clubs (with pool tables)?”
Thanks for the inane suggestion, but I will not be burning my vinyl copies of Marriage on the Rocks · Rock Bottom or Survival of the Fittest · Live. Nor will I be destroying my CD copies of the rest of The Amboy Dukes albums or Ted’s early solo stuff.
Paul
I’d suck Glor’s dick, too, and he wouldn’t have to do anything – I met him once a few years ago, and he’s still looking pretty fine.
D P
@Paul: – Tell us, how tall is Jeff Glor? I’d certainly give him a few good blows, but isn’t he married with a daughter now?
jason
Boyd,
Don’t underestimate the sensuality of angry conservative men. As I said earlier, all that’s needed is a rub around the back of their neck area. Just a rub, not a karate chop.
I’ve been to bed with such types and, by the end of the night, I had climbed all four walls.
Mr. Enemabag Jones
@jason:
I’ve been to bed with such types and, by the end of the night, I had climbed all four walls.
Thank God they’re padded.
the other Greg
We’ve finally discovered Jason’s “talent.” Not such a bad one, I think! Jason is certainly misogynist, but maybe he’s helping gay rights more than we ever suspected. And it’s at least it’s a talent with some obvious, inherent dangers – unlike deer hunting, unless you shoot yourself.
As a 90% vegetarian (probably won’t aim for the 100%), I say what’s so great about deer? There are WAY too many of them. Deer carry ticks and Lyme disease, damage farms & gardens, and cause hundreds (thousands?) of car crashes every year. They are essentially nice-looking giant rats, fuck them. But venison is tasty if properly marinated and grilled, plus it’s free!
Also, the hunters often shoot themselves while cleaning their guns, especially the ones like Ted who’ve never been in the military. Seems like a win-win to me.
But yeah, in a weird way, Ted seems kind of cryptically gay-friendly. The fact that he would even THINK of that… um, metaphor, while being interviewed by a cute young guy, tells us something.
Hyhybt
@the other Greg: “Two game wardens, seven hunters, and a cow?”
D P
@D P: – Well, I’ve got to step back from that statement because I remembered my first commitment is to David Beckham. Jeff Glor is an attractive man, but I *did* place ‘The Becks’ at the top of the list.
JonathanU
Oh Geez, I can’t imagine Ted’s technique is very good. I bet he’s really toothy…
MKisNE
Hunting to watch animals die is immoral. I will never think otherwise. Exceptions have to be made if someone is hungry and going to use the animal for resources. He should have had a more severe punishment for killing that bear in Alaska.
MKisNE
@Mk_ultra_again: seriously.. I don’t offer to suck my friends dicks if they are right about something and I’m wrong. I get that it’s in jest but it’s still strange.