While Americans spent 2007 grappling with the so-called "other F-word" (faggot) and the revival of the original n-word" (nigger), our British pals have been coping with whether or not "the p-word" (poof) should be considered derogatory.
Regardless of where you stand on pejoratives, you should check out Mick Hume's take on the subject. His piece, which can be found in London's The Times, starts thus:
Excuse me, but may I call you a big poof? Officially, it depends; the rules on which words are taboo can swing both ways these days. No wonder we are so confused about our textuality.
Oh, Hume! You're such the humorist!
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A perjorative phrase is like obscenity – you know it when you hear it. It has much to do with context and with intent.
In order to end this culture of hatred, everyone- and including us – must stop using terms of "endearment" whose purpose is to solidify someone's minority status in culture, spirituality, or political stature.