In today’s entertainment climate, it’s tough to get anyone’s attention if your film doesn’t boast lightsabers, mutant super powers or lightsabers.
But one clever exec has discovered a direct route to millennials’ highly coveted brainwaves that cuts through all the explosions and CGI: Zac Efron‘s peen!
Related: The GIFs That Keep On GIFing: Zac Efron Dances In A Thong
What’s so powerful about Zac Efron’s peen is its ability to excite just by revealing a tiny portion of itself from within its dark, damp lair. Yes, much like other great beasts of the wilderness — from Australia’s deadly Eastern Brown Snake to the King Cobras that slither across South-east Asia — all it takes is one glimpse of Zac Efron’s peen to send a shiver down your spine.
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
Quietly (we don’t want to scare it off) take a look at this rare creature as it emerges in the below GIFS to make us curiously interested in the film Dirty Grandpa:
Happy hunting, Explorers Club.
Joseph Papa
Annette Bening’s Oscar?
Imjustsaying
Not to burst anyone’s bubble but it’s all CGI’d. He was wearing a flesh colored brief because A) he was in public and B) he was working with a child. They erased it.
http://img2.timeinc.net/people/i/2015/startracks/150511/zac-efron-2-435.jpg
Bobby Florida Born
And it’s a nice size and thick ð???
Stache
So this little kid was strong enough to rip off his man panti’s. Ha. Go kid.
Stache
@Imjustsaying: Cool. It’s like blue screen for peen.
Rocco Vader
Dude needs to groom that thing…
Daniel Salmeron
Probably a stunt penis lol
Kieran
If there was a way to turn a 4 year old boy gay, this is probably it.
Glücklich
Talent?
DarkZephyr
@Imjustsaying: So are you always “just saying”, ya buzz kill? lol
Anthony Edward Rosener III
Briefs?
Hussain-TheCanadian
As handsome as Zac is, he should focus a bit on his acting skills – Being admired for your looks gets old pretty quick – no one here on this page would tolerate being objectified for long.
…………but damn he’s sexy!!
Jim Philbrick
Zac does nothing for me
SteveDenver
Efron wore flesh-colored shorts during the filming of that scene and a butt-double was digitally painted in. He didn’t flash anything.
David Mack
what was I looking for…??
Ross D Frankel
Some elements strike me as pushing the boundaries of poor taste–and creepy.
Mark Beirne
Nicholas Summerfield
Captain Obvious
@Kieran: …That’s not “turning gay” that’s just straight up pedophilia.
And why did they choose a child for that scene instead of a dog or something? I mean a dog would’ve been funny any way since it’s like that sun tan lotion bottle everyone remembers. Whereas a child in that scene is just gross and unfunny.
jerry_pritikin
Much to do about nothing!
Adam White
Sade Elvidge
Markajv
I will never, in my life, understand the fascination and obsession of seeing a specific persons private parts.(In This Country!) Most men have a penis and balls and most women have boobs and a vagina. What’s so fascinating about this specific one? It’s not like he’s gonna give it to you as a gift or anything. Weird to me.
Jesse Balcuns-Contreras Jr.
Kit Balcuns-Contreras
Glenn Eccles
So…WHERE’S THE BEEF?! 🙂
Sebastián Gaspar
Still wouldn’t watch an Efron movie. The pics do just fine and I don’t have to waste 2 precious hours.
Jerguy Slohcin
If he grew that beard back in “The Lucky One” love would happen
Ken Overholt
His hidden acting talent?
Sansacro
@Rocco Vader: No way! Keep it hot, hairy, and tasty!
Jay Fowler
Nicholas Ball
Simon Renton-Phillips
He has small hands
Kenneth S. Figeroid
meh
da90027
lousy actor no wonder he tries to get attention with this stuff. And poor thing covering it with one hand? LOL
JerseyMike
@Simon Renton-Phillips: lol!!!
Mark Contorno
What’s the “all to do” about Zac Efron? I just don’t get it.
Xzamilio
I’ve been waiting for Damon Wayans, Jr. and his father to spit roast me… I don’t give two country dumps about Zac Efron’s wang. His brother, though… well.
Brian
Ravish my apple breast with your apple strudel, Mr Efron.
DarkZephyr
@jerry_pritikin: could you possibly have meant “much ado about nothing” rather than “much to do about nothing”?
DarkZephyr
@Jim Philbrick: Good for you, I guess?
Alton
Every Queerty column:
Queerty: “Here’s that hot celebrity you like naked!”
Bitchy Gay #1: “Who?”
Bitchy Gay #2: “Does nothing for me.”
Bitchy Gay #3: “I’d like him if he had more/less body/facial hair.”
Bitchy Gay #4: “Why are gay men so focused on looks?”
Bitchy Gay #5: “My cousin’s boyfriend worked on the set and that’s actually a body double you clueless morons.”
Bitchy Gay #6: “This article/picture was so boring it forced me to comment on how boring it was.”
Markajv
@Imjustsaying: Thank you! Some people are still so stupid. I do not get the fascination and obsession people have with people they have no personal connection with. Do you and shut up! I don;t care what you think, feel, want, from a “Celebrity” and it’s even worse when it’s “So Called” Porn Stars. Really? A whore will give you some validity? Ughhh. (Btw, almost every guy has a dick. WHY do you need to see everyone’s dick? Seriously. )
Sluggo2007
I crown thee “Princess Tinymeat of 2015.”
mujerado
There’s something suspicious about posting on a thread like this just to say you don’t care about Zac Efron or his appendage. If you really didn’t care you wouldn’t need to tell anyone.