11 Top Hangover Helpers from Funnyman Bartender Yuri Kagan

319540_871511576768_1377200_n-1Comic Yuri Kagan has bartended all over the Castro, so he knows that the best cure for a hangover is actually a good joke, preferably lots of good jokes. But he also knows how to cure what ails you physically. Check out his hangover helpers, and catch him at a comedy club near you

To cure a hangover, Yuri Kagan recommends:

1. I’ll tell you what my mamma used to say: Keep drinking—no one likes a quitter!

2. Waking up next to someone you don’t remember cures or at least delays any hangover.

3. In Ireland it was said that the cure for a hangover is to bury the ailing person up to the neck in moist river sand. If you don’t have moist river sand handy, just bury them in disappointment and guilt. (Ask any Jewish or Catholic friend how this works.)

4. Ride a bus in any major city. After five minutes of looking around, you’ll instantly feel better about yourself. This alone should kill that hangover magically by making you reach for that vodka flask you hid in your jacket pocket.

5. Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate—especially with a mimosa breakfast.

6. Have some overpriced, douchy coffee with a little rosette on top of it.

7. Watch OWN reruns for four hours. Then take a nap, followed by an entire pot of coffee and eating your hangover away. If the coffee doesn’t do it, you may in fact be dead inside.

8. Have a Bloody Mary–or five.

9. Look at yourself under any department-store florescent light. The horror of it all will help you come to your senses more quickly.

10. If all else fails, between cocktails chug a cups of bitters and soda. (Yes, some of these tips are just plain practical. Thank me later.). It’ll settle your stomach and help you pick up the pieces of your life.

11. Buy tickets to see me at Punchline Comedy Club in San Francisco January 23. You can also read my blog at

Get Queerty Daily

Subscribe to Queerty for a daily dose of #newyear'seve #yurikagan stories and more

One Comment

  • the other Greg

    He sounds like a good bartender & comedian, often the same thing.

    #4 is a little off because you can ride a bus in even a MINOR city & instantly feel better about yourself – try Stockton, Calif. or Amarillo, Texas or Toledo, Ohio or Brockton, Mass., yikes.

    #8 – trying it now!

Comments are closed.