Modern society has a macro issue with microaggressions, which psychologist Derald W. Sue described as “the everyday slights, indignities, put-downs, and insults that people of color, women, LGBT populations or those who are marginalized experiences in their day-to-day interactions with people.”
Per Vox, it was Harvard University professor Chester M. Pierce who coined the term “microaggressions” as he discussed the “incessant and cumulative … assaults to Black dignity and Black hope.” Pierce added,“almost all black–white racial interactions are characterized by white put-downs, done in automatic, preconscious, or unconscious fashion.”
After surveying more than 59,000 workers—more than 4,000 of whom were LGBTQ+—McKinsey revealed in 2022 that nearly one-third of LGBTQ+ employees have experienced a microaggression in the workplace, with trans women and nonbinary women among the most affected subsets.
Related: Do you exhibit ‘asexual microaggressions’ and not even know it? (Hint: Probably)
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“Microaggressions have the potential of making people feel or believe that they are devalued,” Jess Zonana, M.D., a psychiatrist and a founding faculty sponsor of the free LGBTQ+ clinic Weill Cornell Medicine Wellness Qlinic, told Health Matters in 2021. “They have cumulative effects on one’s self-esteem and can breed chronic mistrust, compound the effects of past traumatic discriminatory situations, and be a risk factor to higher rates of mental health difficulties.”
On Twitter, users have been calling out homophobic and transphobic microaggressions in tweets ranging from thought-provoking to (very) tongue-in-cheek.
Here are some of the best tweets about the some of the worst LGBTQ microaggressions …
cishets saying “homosexual” instead of gay feels like a microaggression
— elliott (@ghhostboyy) February 17, 2021
and saying "transgender" instead of trans is on thin ice ?
— ~?? #1 mavis stan ??~ (@strawbfaery) February 17, 2021
pour one out for all the gays experiencing the microaggression of “youre just like david from schitts creek” this christmas
— joe lean (@thottielamottie) December 24, 2019
telling a gay filipino boy that they remind you of bretman rock IS IN FACT a microaggression
— ur pookie (@camdza_) December 22, 2022
"But you don't look trans" is a microaggression
— Natalie Basille | ????? The Trans Mom ???? (@that_token_girl) October 22, 2020
middle class ppl questioning why I don’t drive considering I’m from LA is a double microaggression. I don’t drive because I’m poor AND gay!
— someone left the cake out in the rain (@bjorksunibrow) May 1, 2019
wow okay thanks for that lesbian microaggression autocorrect, phone
I should not have to tell my gay phone how to spell kd lang
— Claire Willett (@clairewillett) September 27, 2022
assuming a trans musician is a hyperpop producer has gotta be some kind of microaggression
— malldate ? (@producergf) December 20, 2022
calling a gay person sassy is a microaggression…,.., will not be taking comments x
— parker gemini ? (@blessedburrito) October 30, 2020
if you're cis, take "I identify as" out of your lexicon, because trans people don't ???????? as their gender, they ??? their gender.
if you say "I'm a guy," but say a trans man "identifies as a man," you're still doing a microaggression, even if it's in good faith
— lydia tár fanclub secretary (@snidelaughter) November 3, 2019
i’ve gotten a lot that i “talk in memes” or things to that effect and i’m chalking that up to being gay and using aave so that’s a microaggression now and punishable by fine up to $25 per infraction
— Dillow Wiamandis, TS (@dickersnoodles) August 11, 2020
Cargo shorts are a homophobic microaggression. Potentially macro, even
— sophie hurwitz (@sophiehurwitz) September 9, 2019
‘Of course you get so many likes on your posts, people think it’s offensive to not like things gay people post’ a microaggression I am remembering from a decade ago (me, 27, still gay, bracing for the 11 likes this tweet is gonna get)
— Brandon Howard Roy (@brandonhroy) September 24, 2021
i'm just trying to read about anti-trans legislation i don't need this additional microaggression pic.twitter.com/A2d2o63ID2
— james factora (@jamesfactora) January 25, 2021
Speaker at a session talking about a microaggression from a person assuming he's gay: "How did you get [your child]?"
My brain: "Well, you know how straights get babies from storks? Queers get ours from giant bats."
— Extra Haruspicy (@Hypatian) May 18, 2019
My ignorant ass coworker really hit me with that “you don’t look gay” microaggression. Tf am I supposed to look like??
— ry$ (@ryanisawake) July 26, 2021
Another gay guy in the office started a message to me with "hey buddy"? Doesn't he know the weight of that microaggression?
— Rich Uncle Skeleton (@SPSSS) July 30, 2021
The correct response to the "what are you gay or something?!" microaggression =
"That would explain all the anal sex I have with other men"
— mastodon.social/@heydon (@heydonworks) November 17, 2016
I don’t know how get people to understand that by only offering courses/classes/etc for “men” and “women” and then telling trans, non-binary, intersex, two spirit, etc people to just “attend the one that you most identify with” is a microaggression and harmful ?
— courtney? (@seasidecourtney) September 17, 2021
oh wow hey y’all,, “female-indentifying” / “male-identifying” is a microaggression. trans women and men are inherently included in the terms Men and Women. ma’am this is a 300 level wgs class
— touya todoroki apologist (@touya_apologist) December 1, 2020
How do I tell the nice lady from church that tagging me in anything that has to do with something gay because I'm the only gay person she knows is a microaggression and that I'm tired of the Facebook notifications
— Faux L'Beau™ ? (@FauxLBeau) July 7, 2018
This white gay gave me this really nice card filled w compliments and I was touched UNTIL he was like “Providence is getting the hottest INDIAN” and I was like god damnit you were doing so well but you had to let your whiteness show one more time w that microaggression :
— A (@YummyyKabob) May 8, 2019
people fr say they dont understand using they/them and then when its time to use it as a microaggression towards a trans woman theyre a they/them expert
— luna ???? (@lunaswagmoney) July 16, 2021
My driver taking me from DTLA to a gay country bar in Studio City and then telling me to "have a nice night" is literally a microaggression.
— Alexis “Bring Back Bunheads” Wilson (@sassyblackdiva) May 21, 2016
is it just me or does the phrase "they want to be called x" instead of "their name is x" give off big transphobic microaggression vibes
— tess lesbiangendr from the hit game twiter (@lesbiangendr) August 23, 2021
homophobic microaggression: someone at this party just asked me "are you also in art school? you look like you might be"
— unbearable experience (@twinkpeaks_) August 7, 2021
My favorite homophobic microaggression is when straight guys call you pal/bud/buddy in THAT tone of voice
— shonda rhimes wrote crossroads (@jersing) August 4, 2017
Related: Watch Amy Coney Barrett get schooled for using “offensive and outdated” term for LGBTQ people
Man About Town
Honestly, I can’t tell if most of these people are being serious or sarcastic. If it’s the former, how pathetic can you get? Especially the nutjob who was offended by her driver telling her to “have a nice night.”
Also, anyone who says “I should not have to tell my gay phone how to spell kd lang” clearly needs to take a look at her profound laziness.
LeBlevsez
Your lack of discernment is obvious. You needn’t confess.
Neoprene
“…if it IS a microaggression, shouldn’t it just make you micro-angry?” – Bill Maher
LeBlevsez
“Sit, Ubu, sit. Good dog.”
Jeremiah
Bingo! While some of these are legitimate, others are just insane. I don’t want to live life feeling like I’m walking on eggshells.
abfab
And with a name like Jeremiah…….
preppyesque
I just love it when straight guys (especially hot ones) treat me more carefully and gently than their girlfriends. All the while some of them covertly trying to flirt with me. Just my fave…
S.anderson
I imagine it’s a “microagression” to say “I’ll just respectfully agree with these tweets, just to be on the safe side”.
Toofie
Weird doing an article but pulling tweets from 3-6 years ago….
bachy
I’m not offended by any of the above, but suspect that might also be considered a micraggression.
Pier
Im offended by people just looking or thinking about me. Its a microaggression and oppressing my freedom etc etc etc
basils_Herald
Some of the microaggression examples are cringeworthy and others are just baby gays who haven’t been jaded by life yet. I personally hate the term microaggression – just call it internalized homophobia, misogyny, racism, transphobia, or whatever. The key to all of this is how a member of a marginalized group of people is made to remember how they’re marginalized daily (often so a less marginalized person doesn’t have to examine their own privilege but sometimes just to be a douche or avoid doing their job). My general experience of homophobia is that it’s like a silent but deadly fart, where I’m left asking myself what I did to piss someone off or what happened to put this person in a bad mood. It’s not always about the individuals involved but the attitudes they’ve internalized and never examined.
Ronbo
IF you want macro-aggressions, just say that you don’t find trans individuals attractive. The girls and bois will lose their shit and call you ‘bigoted’ because … you know, they are “fabulous”; and no one else is allowed an opinion, let alone voice what they find attractive. Even worse, rejecting a trans-female is verboten because we gay men just love to cuddle with and bed women while sucking up all their emotional drama!?! Right?
Although, I’d like to befriend Elliot Page and Billie Porter – both are out there and seem interesting beyond “Look at me! Look at me! …and all the unnecessary drama.
Let go of the sexual obsessions and just be whom you are – don’t get angry when it’s only you and your bestie who thinks you are fabulous. That bestie might be your soulmate (unless your ego says you can do better with someone who is really, Really, REALLY hot). Self-centered personality consistently think that they can do better than YOU!
PS Are Twitter twats the primary source materials for Queerty these days? Seems someone at Queerty wants to enrich Elon. Twitter a place where ego’s and self-centered twits now feel safe. Please let the twats enrich and pay Elon without being promoted my Queerty. There are actual authentic people whose messages are real. Did no one at Queerty read how Twitter is being used as a tool for disseminating false and deceptive propaganda from conservatives and neoliberals?
abfab
Bo, you’re about ready to explode. I hope you don’t have unsecured guns or other firearms. You’re a toxic POS, and very male.
stonercharles
agree
monty clift
No surprise that most of these are from the T crowd. Exhausting.
mlo88
So sad this is what the community focuses on. I don’t think anybody likes to be attacked whether it’s a micro aggression, passive aggressive, or aggressive, aggressive. But fixating on this kind of stuff does nothing but keep u wallowing in self-pity.
stonercharles
AMEN!!!
GreekKeys
No one has ever said, “But you don’t look trans”. Ever.