STYLE COUNCIL

Breaststroke Of Genius: Queerty’s 7 Swimsuit Do’s And Don’ts

The Who-Wears-Short-Short

ronaldo-short-shorts

Do: wear if you’re the aforementioned pocket gay  (it elongates the gams) OR your legs look like they can, and have, choked out a bear — of either the forest or Scruff variety.

mad-men-hawaii-jon-hamm

Don’t: wear if you’re Jon Hamm trying to avoid a wardrobe malfunction.

parke-ronen

Try: 2″ Angeleno Print Swim Trunk – Goa Flame, $125, Parke & Ronen