WHO’S ON THERE?: Men with badly focused webcams masturbating at their desks.
SECONDS UNTIL FIRST COCK: 3 seconds
HOW MANY SECONDS IT TOOK FOR SOMEONE TO ‘NEXT’ ME: 1 seconds (my cock wasn’t out)
HOW MANY SECONDS IT TOOK ME TO ‘NEXT’ SOMEONE ELSE: 1 second (the cock belonged to an elderly glutton)
IS THE DESIGN SEXY?: It’s about as sexy as your average urinal. The design is as classy as its aims.
LESSON LEARNED: I would rather jerk-off alone all night in a dark room than spend even a single second on a back-lit webcam watching an unattractive grandfather pound his pud.