Let’s face it: Holiday entertainment tends to get a little heteronormative. (Can a homo get a gay subplot in Love Actually or what?) But if you wanna have yourself a queer-y little Christmas, check out the gay-friendly tunes below, some of which certainly land on the naughty list!
Related: BeBe Zahara Benet’s ‘Little Drummer Boy’ is the only version that’s necessary now
“All I Want for Christmas Is You” by Steve Grand
This same-sex spin on everyone’s favorite Christmas anthem comes from our favorite out and proud country star. When he snuggles close to his dude’s hairy, chiseled chest, you’ll forget there was even a Mariah Carey version.
“Coming Out at Christmas” by London Gay Men’s Chorus
Hark! The herald gay men sing: Glory to the newly out queens. In 2006, these Brits covered “Hark! The Herald Angels Sing” with a version about bursting out of the closet at the holidays. Example lyrics: “For this year without a doubt / Is the Christmas I come out.”
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
“Rudy, the Big Booty Reindeer” by Big Freedia
Who needs a glowing nose anyway? This parody from the gender-fluid bounce musician — with an assist from Ms. Tee — tells ye olde tale of the curvaceous reindeer who taught Santa how to twerk.
“Christmas Is Here” by Bearforce1
Imagine four bears prancing through a winter wonderland with the fashion and dance moves of a Y2K-era boy band, and you’ve got the music video for this 2007 Xmas medley.
Related: Pietro Boselli reimagines Santa as a shirtless, muscular athlete in sparkly hot pants
“Baby, It’s Cold Outside” by Darren Criss and Chris Colfer
Before Darren Criss was dancing in his underwear on American Crime Story, he was covering this classic with Chris Colfer on Glee, taking Blaine and Kurt’s Christmastime chemistry to the max.
“Hey Sis, It’s Christmas” by RuPaul
RuPaul took a turn lip-syncing for her life during this year’s (divisive) RuPaul’s Drag Race Holi-Slay Spectacular, performing this song from her just-released album, Christmas Party.
“Dirty Gay Christmas” by Jonny McGovern
Billed as “the Gay Pimp’s XXXmas anthem,” this NSFW jam comes from the comedian behind “Soccer Practice” and “BJ Got Me Fallin in Love” and features a music video filled with yuletide porn.
“Homo Christmas” by Pansy Division
Slightly more safe for work is the music video for this 1992 track… though the dancers do simulate penetration by candy cane! Example lyrics: “You deserve a cute boy who’s horny and queer / To make the most out of Christmas cheer.”
“Christmas In Your Heart” by Sam Sparro
We couldn’t leave you with at least one track suitable for a quiet night by the fireside. So behold, this velvety-voiced (and openly gay) Aussie performing an original holiday tune.