Raising My Rainbow

A Tangled Mess: How To Tell Santa Your Possibly Gay 3-Year-Old Wants A Doll For Christmas

Following is the cast of characters featured in Raising My Rainbow, a blog about the adventures in raising a slightly effeminate, possibly gay, totally fabulous son.

C.J

The most enchanting child you will ever meet with an insane knack for art and color, interior design and dance. His passions include Barbie, Disney Princesses, Strawberry Shortcake and women’s hair and shoes. Paula Deen holds a special place in his heart.

C.J.’s Mom (Me, the blogger)

A feisty, sassy girl-woman trying to have it all and usually feeling like she is failing miserably while all those around her are none-the-wiser. She works part-time as a business consultant, full-time as a mother and overtime as a walking panic attack.

C.J.’s Dad

A police officer and recovering bully with his 15-year chip for bully sobriety; he secretly fears that karma won’t be a bitch to himself, but to his look-alike son. He’s an Irishman with a heart of gold hidden underneath his tough-guy façade and ever-present scowl.

C.J.’s Brother

Seven going on 30, he’s wise, kind and the best big brother a younger sibling could ask for. Embarrassed by nothing, except when C.J. acts like a girl.

Uncle Uncle

A creature from a sitcom who is bigger than life and loved by all. One of the most important people involved in the raising of C.J. because of his homosexuality. If it takes a village to raise a child, Uncle Uncle is the court jester, mayor, therapist, stylist and official storyteller.

Nana Grab Bags

The maternal grandmother who was created by God to spoil grandchildren. She’s allergic to harsh words and unhappiness and carries an oversized Target purse filled with candy, toys, hugs and zany theories.

Pa

The maternal grandfather who is a devout born-again Christian and macho Mexican-American. Enough said.

Grandma and Grandpa Colorado

The paternal grandparents who are thousands of miles away. A hunting, drinking, fishing, old-fashioned duo that are waiting for the day when C.J. grows out of “this phase.”