When he’s not auditioning for acting gigs, Nicholas Brown writes about his life for several high-profile outlets. This week, in an item on The Atlantic blog, he ruminates on his admitted discomfort in booking a particular commercial.
Knowing more than a few thespians, we’re shocked any actor would balk at a paying gig that didn’t involve hardcore sex. In this instance, though, it was a kiss that set Brown off—a kiss with another male actor in a AIDS-awareness PSA:
I am not gay. I have no shortage of gay friends. My uncle is gay. I’ve marched in a gay pride parade. More than half of the roommates I have lived with are gay. I support marriage equality.
So it comes as a shock to me when I realize that, actually, if I am honest with myself, I’m not comfortable with kissing another man on camera. I really don’t want to book this part.
I don’t want people to think I’m gay. And I’m even more uncomfortable because that isn’t a thought that I want to have.
We can understand (not condone) Brown’s paranoia—the impression an actor gives his audience is basically what defines an actor. But the days of assuming any performer in a gay role is a homosexual in real life are long gone, aren’t they?
I ask my theatrical agent if there is any industry stigma about doing a gay role. “No,” he says, “not since Will & Grace in the ’90s.”
I call my commercial agent to ask him the same question. “No,” he says. “Ikea was doing ads with gay couples in the ’90s. Will & Grace really changed things.” “But you had to ask me two times if I was comfortable,” I protest. “We would do that on any spot where you have to kiss,” he tells me.
Gigi Nicolas, the director of on-air promotions at Logo, tells me that at least I was not alone in my discomfort. “We had to do a second round of casting,” she says. “Far fewer people auditioned than I expected. Most of my top choices just didn’t show up.”
Setting aside the fact that we’ve come a long way since Will & Grace, something doesn’t quite add up: Was it the gay kiss that set Brown and the others off—or was it being associated with AIDS? While there’s no indication the characters in the ad were HIV+, the mere mention of the virus can send people scurrying.
How about we take this to the next level?
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Brown apologizes for his reaction—in fact he apologizes for “the whole ugly human history of slights and hate crimes and exclusion”—but do you think he’s being homophobic, realistic or foolish?
Chime in below in the comments section.
Photo: ThisIsNicksWebsite.com
Boricuaex
Very discriminatory. Substitute being gay for being Black or Hispanic and what do you have? What a creep.
Caleb in SC
No, I think he is being honest. What saves him from being a true “creep” is that he also admits that he doesn’t want to have these feelings.
MikeE
He’s an actor. He should be “Acting” regardless of what the role calls for him to do.
I imagine that he would also turn down a role as a serial killer or rapist, as that would be something he’s not comfortable identifying with?
Oh, you mean he wouldn’t?
yeah, he’s a homophobe. he’s just a polite homophobe.
Tyler
I see nothing wrong with feeling uncomfortable about kissing someone you’re not attracted to, let alone someone of a gender you’re not attracted to. If I were asked to kiss a woman on camera for breast cancer awareness or something, I’d refuse. Does this make me heterophobic?
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
Yes. He is a witch. Burn. Him. Now!
Seriously though what he has achieved there is simultaneously distancing himself from being tainted with the homo whilst also claiming his liberal credentials necessary to keep the dollar rolling in. quite the Rhetorical feat, actually
Mike
Very astutely put, Divkid.
What a little prick. He wants all the modern-day benefits of being progressive, without actually being progressive. Screw you, Ms Brown. Who the hell are you anyway?
Charles175
I’m gay and I’ve never been attracted to a woman. Does this mean that I would refuse to kiss a lady on camera or off camera? No not at all. I think that it’s kinda cool and wouldn’t mind doing so at all.
Lefty
Sounds like acting isn’t something he’s cut out for, then, doesn’t it?
Unless he only wants to play roles that exactly mirror his own life, feelings, experiences, personality, etc.
It always amazes me when actors, many of whom have played murderers, rapists, villains, heroes who no one else will ever measure up to let alone them, parents (if they don’t have children of their own), politicians, criminals, people of different nationalities, etc etc; in other words CHARACTERS DOING/BEING ALL SORTS OF THINGS THEY THEMSELVES HAVE OR NEVER WILL DO/BE THEMSELVES (ie. ACTING!), only ever seem to feel discomfort playing gay characters.
Every time one of them says that the logical response is: Get out of acting. You don’t understand what it is.
Lefty
A true actor is an outsider. The craft of acting should be entirely outside of social prejudice and mores.
If he feels uncomfortable while kissing a man on camera or stage – or doing anything that the character does (unless the character himself would feel uncomfortable in that situation) then he isn’t acting, is he?
He should become an accountant or something…
Larry McD
Amazing how shallow and ill-informed many of these comments are… actually how shallow and barely informed Queerty’s reporting on it is. I’d be willing to bet that not one of the commenters on this string have actually read the original blog post. They are simply shooting off their opinions based on Queerty’s reportage.
I think Brown’s piece is a serious effort at self-examination and remarkably honest in the effort.
Little-Kiwi
actually, he’s done a very commendable thing: he’s admitted to a learned-insecurity and recognizes it as a complete failing on his part. by recognizing it he will no doubt overcome it.
think, then, about the actually-gay people, commenting on here, who themselves walk around each day “hoping that people cannot tell that they’re gay” and likely not being comfortable kissing another man in public, or in a medium that is accessible to public viewing.
yes. he’s still insecure. but at least he acknowledges that it’s a bad thing he needs to work on.
Dennis Hopper made a living playing insane murdering sociopaths. people didn’t wonder if “he actually murdered people, since he played murderers so much”
i’m a gay man and as an actor i’ve actually yet to have a same-sex love scene or kissing scene. I’ve had to kiss many a woman. how did i react? well, professionally. add on to that the reality that there’s no negative social stigma to “straightness” and you get the reality – of course there’s no ick-factor.
we live in a world where people, gay and straight, are still more comfortable seeing a man kill another man in art, as opposed to love another man in art.
food. for. thought.
Charlie in Charge
Hey I think this is great. He has these feelings and comes to the conclusion “What’s wrong with me?” This is not a bad thing y’all.
the other Greg
@Larry McD: Good point – I just finished reading the original blog post and it’s more interesting, and more weird, than this summary suggests. (The comments are hilarious, btw!)
He actually says: “Still, I wouldn’t turn down a commercial that required me to pretend to slap a child, or one where I played a Nazi. And—assuming the ad wasn’t advocating child abuse or Nazism—I don’t think I would feel odd about the audition.” Well… um… that’s some equivalency there.
But he also doesn’t exactly say that he turned down the role. Maybe he took it after all.
2eo
@Larry McD: A blog is far, far too long for many here to read, I don’t doubt for a second Avery didn’t read it either. Reading seems to be a trait that is sorely missing from his diminutive repertoire.
PrettyLittleLiar
UGH! Who cares? Sometimes dudes don’t want to kiss other dudes. I don’t expect all of my straight male friends to be cool with making out with me. As an actor some people have certain standards, like folks who won’t do nudity, or walk, or jump out of planes, or learn their lines, or whatever. If he were gay and said he wasn’t cool with kissing girls no one would call him out for it.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Tyler:
I don’t know if it would make you heterophobic as much as an all round shitty human if you can’t see the bigger picture there.(There are a lot of things that make us uncomfortable that are nevertheless worth doing i.e. giving a vaccine injection to a child etc.)
Besides, this man didn’t feel THAT uncomfortable enough he refused the money for that work. Don’t do the work and let some poor struggling actor work instead. He should of worked all this out in his own head before he took the job and certainly before committing his unease to public record possibly for more money (?) Disgust pays it seems; likewise Lacking conviction.
Lefty
He’s writing an article on the basis that he’s an actor. Social stigma has no place in acting.
Is he going to write an article on everything he does as an “actor” which makes him feel uncomfortable?
There’s a double-standard here, too: a straight actor will not feel physical attraction towards every actress he has to kiss, just as a gay actor will not feel physical attraction towards every actor he has to kiss.
Is he going to write an article for every case where he’s had to kiss an actress he isn’t attracted to?
Well, the logical answer in extension to this article would be that he is… but of course he won’t.
It’s a nonsense.
A true actor who understands the work they do would never feel something like this, let alone use it to write an article. Such sentiment would be an embarrassing admission to any true actor.
Would a Shakespearean actor – to take an extreme example – feel discomfort playing Iago?
If they did, then they’re not acting, are they? Iago feels no such discomfort, so any “actor” in the role who did would be pretending to act the role rather than acting the role – that’s the difference.
The objection isn’t that in being influenced by social stigma he feels discomfort at kissing a man. The objection is that he’s writing this article under the pretense that he’s an actor. The obvious and unintended point of this article is that he clearly doesn’t understand both the process and the beauty of acting.
There are two elements to his article: he’s a man and he’s supposed to be an actor. As a man, perhaps it’s possible to commend him for admitting he doesn’t feel comfortable kissing a man (it will be more commendable if he writes articles for every actress he isn’t attracted to who he doesn’t feel comfortable kissing either, but that isn’t going to happen). As an “actor”, the admission is in no way commendable.
He represents too many people who think they’re actors but who have no idea what it means to be one.
Social stigma, mores, moral judgments, prejudice etc – these are the province of the public. Acting exists entirely outside of such things.
He should learn what acting is, then come back and write articles as “an actor” – until then, he’s a pretend actor who’s writing double-standard articles.
@Little-Kiwi:
“think, then, about the actually-gay people, commenting on here, who themselves walk around each day “hoping that people cannot tell that they’re gay” and likely not being comfortable kissing another man in public, or in a medium that is accessible to public viewing…”
That’s a false analogy and possibly insulting to those gay people. There’s a very obvious reason why many don’t feel comfortable kissing in public: the very real risk of violent physical reprisals.
Also – and I can’t stress this enough – THEY AREN’T ACTORS INHABITING A ROLE. That’s real life and there are a multitude of reasons why many gay people in REAL LIFE feel such fear and even some remnants of shame. Dismissing these fears and even their internalised shame is merely an extension of the bullying homophobia that produced such feelings in the first place. They are ALL victims of homophobia. Deriding them is just compounding the damage already done.
It’s ironic, Kiwi, how you always love to tell gay people on here that you disagree with to “grow a pair” (you’re still not understanding how much sexist bullshit that statement is, I see), yet you commend a straight man for telling everyone how uncomfortable he feels KISSING someone he isn’t attracted to. So brave! 🙂
Little-Kiwi
no, he’s brave for admitting that his insecurity is a failing. i suppose you missed that part in your desperate attempt to argue with me. try again, sugarpie 🙂
the shame he’s talking about is not that different from the shame i talked about – gay men who don’t people to know that they’re gay.
the irony are the closeted men on this thread who are criticizing this man for…what? being just like them? afraid that people will think ‘they’re gay”?
exactly.
😉
ChiChi Man
@Larry McD: Yeah, everyone should read the original article before forming the lynch mob. It’s an honest examination of homophobic feelings. Brown makes a point of saying that he wouldn’t have a problem playing a Nazi or a child abuser and that he knows this feelings of discomfort are wrong.
If anything, he probably just needs a little practice 🙂
Little-Kiwi
the point is this, though – if you’re not prepared to inhabit a character, you’re in the wrong profession.
and as i stated earlier, which anonymous commenters will ignore, is that we still live in a culture where a man feels more comfortable being seen holding a gun than his male lover’s hand.
you gay commenters on here know exactly what i’m talking about. this actor is not comfortable being seen kissing a man. and neither are you. and you’re actually gay.
focus less on criticizing this young man for addressing his own insecurities and work on getting over your own. by acknowledging his own failings he’s already a few steps ahead of some of you.
*elegant curtsy*
Lefty
“I don’t want people to think I’m gay.” – Nicholas Brown
I wonder if Anthony Hopkins worried that people would think he’s a psychopathic serial-killing cannibal when he played Hannibal Lecter?
Or if Sean Penn worried that people would think he was Harvey Milk and not Sean Penn playing Harvey Milk?
Or if Leonardo DiCaprio worried that people might think he drowned in the Titanic disaster and his agent would stop calling? 🙁
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
Okay, further to my previous comments I’m unclear as to whether he did actually take the job which might make a difference to my conclusion.
(For the record I haven’t read the full article because I’m reading this on a tiny screen and it’s maddening. But as ever I am trusting in queerty’s impeccable standards of journalism … Ahem…)
the other Greg
@Lefty: “There’s a very obvious reason why many don’t feel comfortable kissing in public: the very real risk of violent physical reprisals.”
Don’t be silly, it’s easy to be brave if you never, ever leave Manhattan except to visit mom and dad in Toronto.
As Ogden Nash put it: “The Bronx? No thonx!”
Lefty
@Little-Kiwi: “focus less on criticizing this young man for addressing his own insecurities”
Sweetheart, you spend all your time on this site criticizing the imagined insecurities of anyone who disagrees with you.
Please, please think things through before you press submit.
Every time I read one of your posts it’s like hope is crushed under sheer weight of irony x
the other Greg
“Still, I wouldn’t turn down a commercial that required me to pretend to slap a child, or one where I played a Nazi. And—assuming the ad wasn’t advocating child abuse or Nazism—I don’t think I would feel odd about the audition.”
I guess I may have seen that PSA about child abuse at some point, but what kind of TV commercial would need someone to play a Nazi? Maybe some unusually “jokey” Volkswagen commercial? Must be some really wild TV market.
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: I THINK he took the role (& hope he did, after all that!) but it’s unclear. At the end he goes into some vacuous religious maunderings so maybe it’s in there someplace.
Mr. Enemabag Jones
@ChiChi Man:
Brown makes a point of saying that he wouldn’t have a problem playing a Nazi or a child abuser
So he lumps gays in with Nazis and child abusers? Lovely.
Mr. Enemabag Jones
Gigi Nicolas, the director of on-air promotions at Logo, tells me that at least I was not alone in my discomfort. “We had to do a second round of casting,” she says. “Far fewer people auditioned than I expected. Most of my top choices just didn’t show up.”
This wouldn’t happen is casting agents would cast gay men to play gay roles. Instead, out actors are shunned in favour of straight actors.
Joincny
What does this say about him? He’s insecure and homophobic. He’s no different from most gay men.
Guillermo3
I agree with Little Kiwi & some other comment-ers here.At least he’s being Honest AND Thoughtful.To paraphrase C.Crocker: LEAVE NICHOLAS BROWN ALONE!!
Lefty
@Joincny: You’ve met most gay men and got to know each of them well enough to make such a judgment? Wow, you’ve been around.
Lefty
@Guillermo3: “At least he’s being Honest AND Thoughtful.”
Honest, certainly, but is this what passes for thoughtfulness here:
“I don’t want people to think I’m gay.”
“Still, I wouldn’t turn down a commercial that required me to pretend to slap a child, or one where I played a Nazi.”
Jack E. Jett
You might have missed the part where he said he was fine with being fist fucked by a dude as long as he didn’t use any lubricant and didn’t nibble on his ears.
tazz602
It’s no different than an actor who doesn’t want to do nude love scenes because they don’t want to embarrass their kids or family as many have said and refused roles or had scripts rewritten. Is it any different than Tim Tebow who takes a gig promoting an underwear company but refuses to be pictured in any briefs?
I do applaud him for admitting that he didn’t want to have those feelings of being afraid of being thought of as gay. He’s ok in my book.
Joincny
@Lefty: I have been around enough to know that gay men are their own worst enemy.
kevininbuffalo
“Of course I can play a heterosexual, I’m an actor”
Sir John Gielgud
pscheck2
It bemuses me that people like Mr. Brown, have to come to print to exclaim they are not gay! Now, really, why is he so paranoid about being labeled gay when he admits he has an uncle who is gay, roomed with gays and has friends as gay? Being in that enviroement, he should be proud to be considered gay and not treat the appellation, gay, as a tag akin to trailer trash! Who is he afraid of labeling him as gay (from that gig)? His girlfriend? His parents?( Think not, unless they suspect he might be?) Then who? I strongly suspect he has an image problem of himself and does not want to be ‘tainted’ in the slightest, as being gay! Doth he protest too much?
Guillermo3
@Jack E. Jett: Cool your Jets,Jett.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
I don’t understand how you get to the point where you can meticulously delineate your faulty thinking apropos homophobia…and in the process not to have long since moved the fuck past this mentality already … rendering this a phoney exercise.
This seems more like some sort of conscience wank that we’re all invited to applaud as he Liberally splurges in our greatful deviant faces whilst aiming at the laydeez, obviously.
Lefty
@pscheck2: I thought that was odd, too. Thinking about it some more, it’s just possible that he couldn’t think of anything else to write about (he doesn’t appear to have much acting experience at all – not sure why he’s been commissioned to write articles about being an actor, to be honest – there must be more experienced actors who would do the gig) – maybe this was the first thing he thought of writing about so ran with it, exaggerating and embellishing to fill out the piece?
Lefty
@Joincny: In my experience, most people are their own worst enemy (and I’ve met everyone).
balehead
very insecure but alot of an asshole..good luck with your career!
BritAus
Who ?
John Doe
BIG DEAL. I don’t care if he is uncomfortable or not. He’s honest about it and pondering the situation. If I were honest, I’d HATE to kiss a woman. That doesn’t make me anti-heterosexual. If my straight guy friends didn’t want to kiss another guy (or have others thing they are gay), who really cares? I don’t. Most guys don’t want to kiss guys…. and most gays don’t want to kiss someone of the opposite sex.
Sounds like he is trying to work this out… and feels overly guilty in my opinion. He is unfortunately falling victim to the politically correct crowd that says he CANNOT AT ALL (for even 1/2 of one second) in ANY way dislike kissing someone of the same sex. Any HINT of doing so would make him an evil person who hates gays and is anti-gay in every way. Well, the posts above prove that this sort of pressure is put on people like him by the hyped up gay crowd that overreacts to everything.
He’s a guy. He doesn’t want to kiss other guys. Period. And I don’t want to kiss any women. Period. I’m gay.
MudgeBoy
I agree with Brown. I’m gay and I’m homophobic. I never wanted to be gay and it has taken
a long time for me to accept myself as gay and to actually be glad that I’m gay. But I’m
still hesitant about announcing it in public. After all, it’s not something I’m dying to
tell my relatives about and most people at work assume I’m straight. I admire Brown for being honest. Amazing how judgmental people here are, or maybe they’re just trolls.
We cannot just shrug off centuries of brain washing and being taught that being gay is
sinful, etc. His idiot the pope condemns gay people every chance he gets. So don’t tell
me everyone rejoices in my homosexuality!
Yup, I admire Brown for his honesty. I also wish the trolls would avoid this site.
Tommy25
@John Doe But you’re not an actor. The definition of being an actor is that you are required to do things and portray emotions that you may not have in you real life or feel comfortable doing in real life. A big part of most tv shows and movies is relationships. If you are not comfortable kissing people of either gender for whatever reason that really limits you as an actor and basically disqualifies you from your job. I can understand if you don’t want to get naked or do explicit things, but kissing? Really?
Does his principles apply to doing other things he feels uncomfortable with like drinking or using drugs, not that I”m comparing being gay to that. Would he refuse to portray a drug addict because people might think he uses drugs in real life?
Let’s face it, the best most meaty roles require you to do something that is often out of your own experience and things that you would never do in your daily life.
goweho
@MikeE: Those are excellent examples. The reality is that acting is acting, but maybe he feels like kissing is on the same scale of taking a big one for the team. If that were to happen, the world would definitely call him gay… lol
Daniel-Reader
If he doesn’t want people thinking he’s gay, then he should not be an actor – a professional where people presume you are gay since gay guys and straight women traditionally become thesbians. He should be, perhaps, a coal miner since, while there are gay coal miners, most people presume coal miners are straight.
Also, you want people to think you are gay if you play a gay role because that means you are a good, professional actor who can pull off a believable performance, rather than just a model spouting lines like an automaton.
Steve Rider
As a gay man life has taught me that the way you feel can not be wrong. This man honestly and iopenly tells us about his feelings, I fail to see how that could be wrong.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Steve Rider really?
By analogy, if a racist white supremacist goes on record self-flagellating himself for his destructive erroneous views, yet nevertheless STILL RETAINS THESE SAME VIEWS … how is this candour good, useful, or in any sense meaningful, exactly?
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Steve Rider really?
By analogy, if a r@cist white supremacist goes on record self-flagellating himself for his destructive erroneous views, yet nevertheless STILL RETAINS THESE SAME VIEWS … how is this candour good, useful, or in any sense meaningful, exactly?
goweho
Is it just me, or is this the first case of a man who is not homophobic to other people, but homophobic towards himself?
Guillermo3
@Lefty: Oh,Lefty,Lighten-up!Little Kiwi’s ironies are often CLEVER AND TO THE POINT_BESIDES IT COULD BE WORSE:Your hopes and other things could be crushed by an obese top!
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
Has he been in Harry Potter (not literally), has he sported furry feet?
No! He is irrelevant. A non-entity.
I wonder if he’s even given his Coriolanus.
Guillermo3
@MudgeBoy: MudgeBoy,I wish there were fewer “trolls” on this site’s comments pages too.However the snarks on this post’s comments are nothing compared to the probably self-hating,probably closeted homophobes who too often try to find relief by displacing their homophobic anger on to the post’s subject or its comment-ers,or both.
AS YOU ARE LEARNING,MudgeBoy,some gay people as just as mean-spirited as some of the rest of humanity
I admire you for telling your story.Mine is similar,and it took my coming to the brink of old age and 2 near-death experiences to accept myself.I can say that I think you are wise to be judicious about to whom you come out and when.
No reason it can’t be a gradual and partial process.Also,both accepting myself and being out to many people has given me a huge sense of RELIEF and FREEDOM.
Guillermo3
@Daniel-Reader: Daniel-Reader:”thesbians”,thespians,or lesbians?Actually,I don’t think most straight women become lesbians.
Marvin Vann
Stop being so judgmental and self-righteous. You’d think we lgbtq folks would have had quite enough of that. He’s making a serious, honest self-examination about the pervasiveness and insidiousness of homophobic feelings, which are wide-spread in subtle forms even amongst folks of good will and, yes, even amongst gay folks. He should be commended for the hard self-examination and for opening up the conversation.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
Somebody tell me if he’s come through the other side of this dark night of the soul and will he take it up the bracket to prove it?
Lefty
@Guillermo3: Dorothy Parker lives!
the other Greg
Assuming he did take the part, we can all look forward to seeing how well this two-second kiss on a Logo commercial turns out!
Maybe he should have a talk with that kid from Two & A Half Men, the one who thinks his own show is “filth” and yet he still manages to go through the motions.
Lefty
@Tommy25: “If you are not comfortable kissing people of either gender for whatever reason that really limits you as an actor and basically disqualifies you from your job.”
Absolutely.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Guillermo3: Have you genuinely mistaken this for a sociology seminar? If not lighten the fuck up.
2eo
You guys do realise prefacing a comment with “as a man” or “as a gay man” doesn’t lend what you have to say any remote credence whatsoever.
It’s the reverse of “I’m not racist, but”.
The only thing that matters is the content, what you are does not matter, the only thing that matters is what you have to say, and most of you are sorely lacking in the grey matter department to come up with anything relevant.
2eo
You guys do realise prefacing a comment with “as a man” or “as a gay man” doesn’t lend what you have to say any remote credence whatsoever.
It’s the reverse of “I’m not r@cist, but”.
The only thing that matters is the content, what you are does not matter, the only thing that matters is what you have to say, and most of you are sorely lacking in the grey matter department to come up with anything relevant.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@2eo: “…and most of you are sorely lacking in the grey matter department to come up with anything relevant.”
I agree with this…
unless it refers to me too…in which case….. actually, no, fair enough, I’ll cop to that!
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
Have to say, if I ever get to see this guy work I certainly won’t be giving him a warm hand on his entrance…
nor his exit “pursued by a (muscle) bear”
nineinchnail
If he isnt comfortable kissing another man in a part thats his choice and who are we to judge? Saying he is homophobic is just ridiculous.
Atomicrob
I don’t think his exclusions make Nicholas Brown homophobic. I think it makes him boring.
Little-Kiwi
i think some of you have bad reading comprehension skills.
what’s he saying? that not only does it make him uncomfortable, but his DISCOMFORT ABOUT IT MAKES HIM UNCOMFORTABLE.
meaning, he’s disappointed in his own homophobia. he recognizes it as a failing.
duh.
curan
Look at how harshly gay people judge one another.
Size queens. Too fem. Too butch. Too old. Too young. Too big. Too small. Too blonde. Too poor. Too rich. Too smart. Too dumb. Too drunk. Too sober.
Gay people can be heartless bitches.
So do I begrudge an otherwise anti-homophobic actor his aesthetic preferences?
No.
Little-Kiwi
curan, again, what people seem to be missing is that what this actor is saying is not “i’m uncomfortable with kissing another man”, but actually “i’m upset that i’m uncomfortable with kissing another man”
he’s highlighting a learned prejudice. one that, apparently, a lot of actually-gay commenters on here have swallowed and adopted into their own lives.
oh, the irony.
goweho
Actors need to get out of the way of their characters and let their talent do the work. Get the ego out of the way. Less wah wah and more mwah mwah.
goweho
“I’m upset that I’m uncomfortable about killing a jew,” said one Nazi to the other.
“There, there, Hans,” said the other. “That only makes you more human in my eyes.”
Guillermo3
@Lefty: Thanks,Lefty!! Horticulture is my favorite Parker:”You can lead a whore to Culture,but you can’t make her Think.”
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: @ PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID,aka DOG SH*T:WHAT COMMENTS of mine turned on your shit-jets?____No matter: Darken the fuck up by buring yourself 8 feet under[PLEASE!]
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: Sorry,PRINCE! I meant to write “bury yourself 8 feet under” a heap of HIV+ DOG SH*T.
Lefty
@Guillermo3: And irony dies once more… 🙁
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
Good lawd is this still going on? don’t you people know there are more important things going on in the world like Frank Ocean has just confirmed he’s in love again.
I might be particularly biased against this thesp because I once had a night with a rather garden variety actor, only in the morning, to celebrate our sacred union, his parting gift was ( I’m not making this up ) a signed publicity shot of his big bloated face … so yeah I’m still bitter. It’s only been 12 years. Too soon too soon!!!Thanks for listening. Bye.
Guillermo3
@Lefty: @Lefty:HUNH?
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Guillermo3: Don’t be mean to me it only gives me urges.
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: 3 CHEERS for the BLOATED ACTOR!
Lefty
@Little-Kiwi: “i think some of you have bad reading comprehension skills.
what’s he saying? that not only does it make him uncomfortable, but his DISCOMFORT ABOUT IT MAKES HIM UNCOMFORTABLE.”
In that case, can you apply your exceptional reading comprehension skills to the following:
“I don’t want people to think I’m gay.”
“Still, I wouldn’t turn down a commercial that required me to pretend to slap a child, or one where I played a Nazi.”
He doesn’t want to kiss a man on camera in case people think he’s gay. But he has no problem playing a child abuser or someone complicit in the Holocaust.
Still, at least he’s honest about it. So brave!
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: I HOPE,PRINCE,that it gives you urges to EAT SH*T_But that would be cannibalism,wouldn’t it?
Lefty
Oh well, this was fun.
I can’t wait for his next article on what a pain in the ass auditions are…
pscheck2
@goweho: Excellent point! He only typifies several other celebs who want to distant themselves from the ‘gay’ appellation! They fear the tag: faggot. I suspect most, if not all, are closet cases and to the world outside of their closet, they want to appear str8! IMAGE!
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Guillermo3: God you are sexy when you’re angry. Which is all of the time. adios my permanently sexy friend. ;p
goweho
@pscheck2: I’m a bit surprised that the conversation isn’t more about being in the closet, or coming out of the closet. I mean where there’s smoke there’s a fire, and I see flames!
Little-Kiwi
@Lefty:
yes. he reiterated my point. that we live in a culture where one can play mass-murderers and not worry about being perceived as an actual mass-murderer, and yet they’re terrified that play one who loves men will lead folks to think that they actually love men.
see also: a culture that honours those who kill in battle yet not those who are openly gay whilst in battle.
again you boys have your knickers in a twist because you lack discernment. kudos!
Guillermo3
@QUEERTY CENSOR: GET FUCKED.
goweho
I think this post is revealing in that it proves that gays cannot ever show a unified front to the world at large. There’s always factions that will let the world roll over them and believe that others have the best intentions even when their actions do not (while they say they do). Then there are those who always see homophobia behind every rock. Amidst the bickering the world rolls by wonder what bumps in the road they ran over. These extremes in thinking are not only political, they take control of our personal lives, whether in relationships, sex or otherwise. I’m not saying we should be normal in the breeder sense of the word, but rather we should have a treatise, or a philosophy or even a thinking. A movement is a good start, but usually movements fall to apathy or the boots of tyranny.
Guillermo3
@Guillermo3: ,@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS:CENSORED BY QUEERTY AGAIN,SO: I’ll
try again:Thanks PRINCE! Yes,I’m Sexy/Angry,and I know it.However,you can’t brush me off so fast[like your bloated faced one-night-stand actor]_Fighting with you is too much fun!
If your “sociology seminar” snark was about MudgeBoy’s comments and my reply:SHAME!!! We can be sincere here and try to help,you know?
Guillermo3
@Guillermo3:,@PRINCE OF SNARHNESS: Replying with edit,hoping to avoid Queerty’s auto-censor:SEXY/ANGRY,I know!
Your “sociology seminar”remarks:If that was about MudgeBoy’s and my exchange[both of us sincere,BTW]:We can be both compassionate and try to help here.It’s not ALL ABOUT c*ck,you know?
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Guillermo3:
Congratulations upon reaching 500 comments; time well spent I think we can all agree. Some distant civilisation will carry your wisdom beyond our present solar system such is the monument you have erected. It is enough to know I played a miniscule part.
the other Greg
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: 500 comments, OMG I think I was involved in that first thread, it seems like last week!
Note to closeted readers: Guillermo3 is a great example of what NOT to do – he didn’t come out until his 60s, and look what happens!
Aw, the Queerty auto-censor isn’t THAT difficult to figure out, it’s not exactly the Enigma code.
the other Greg
@goweho: “I’m a bit surprised that the conversation isn’t more about being in the closet, or coming out of the closet. I mean where there’s smoke there’s a fire, and I see flames!”
You’re onto something, try to imagine an article like this being written by Sean Penn, Jake Gyllenhall or Heath Ledger, Philip Seymour Hoffmann, several gay characters played by straights on ”Sex & the City,” or more to the point a very young Michael C. Hall when he was starting out and maybe worried about being thought gay, or any of the David character’s boyfriends on “Six Feet Under” (e.g. Adam Scott now of “30 Rock”), etc. etc. etc. Or for that matter DiCaprio now that J. Edgar is generally interpreted as gay in the modern sense. Or of course Eric McCormick who Brown’s agent actually needs to remind him about (not that it helps much!).
All this – NOT for a credited gay role in a movie, play or TV show, but for an uncredited, two-second kiss in a TV commercial??? Yeah, maybe there’s something else going on here.
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: It’s 502[with this one,503],PRINCE[You MORON],AND:DESPITE the snarhiness,your name being well-earned! I agree these wonderful exchanges will be a MONUMENT for THE AGES! Seriously}I wish all of us here could TALK TO,NOT AT each other,instead of tearing each other down and basking in our HALF-WITTICISMS.
the other Greg
ahahahahaha – Yes oh yes why oh why can’t the gay community stick together and be nicer to each other “YOU MORON” hahahahaha!
Guillermo3
@the other Greg: UNNECESSARILY NASTY,the other Greg! However,you are right about the perils of late-emerging}NOT [or Not Just] the moronic jibes on QUEERTY’s comments pages,but life wasted,i.e.:sex and relationships and love.That is why I counsel younger people not to wait/to realize that one’s sexual orientation and activities(Excluding pedophilia,torture,or becoming a Republican,of course) DON’T FUCKING MATTER!
I’m glad that you find QUEERTY’s censorship so transparent,the other Greg}I don’t.It’s apparently not vulgar words,self-censored,or not,NOR is it the subject matter,so far as I can figure.
Meanwhile,the other Greg,please go soak your head[and NO,I’m not talking about your p*nis].
Guillermo3
@the other Greg: I wasn’t writing to you,the otherGreg,you MORON.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Guillermo3:
After #500 the quality fell off so it doesn’t count.
Half-witticisms!?! Lol. One of us is being flattered here!
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: Which half,PRINCE OF?
the other Greg
@Guillermo3: Oh Guillermo, you have the most sincere pumpkin patch on Queerty.
(Perhaps ‘old-timers’ from two years ago will remember the joke.)
Guillermo3
@the other Greg: SILLY,the other Greg,SILLY.I wasn’t here 2 years ago,as my ‘net addiction hadn’t taken hold yet.The only “sincere pumpkin patch” I know of is Charlie Brown’s.I sincerely hope that you don’t look like him,but if you do,soaking your head may result in beneficial shrinkage.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Guillermo3: C’mon now fella you have neither the wit, elan, Nor basic social skills to take either Greg or myself on. This is getting embarrassing it’s stating to feel like senior abuse. you really wanna go balls out buddy?
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
That was cheap I apologise.
noprah
I’m sorry, who is this guy again?
the other Greg
@Guillermo3: Linus not Charlie Brown. It’s snowing here so my head is still kind of wet from walking home from work in it.
Two years ago there used to be a very frequent, very excitable commenter here (whose screen name escapes me right now but I’ll think of it) who disappeared and who I’ve always feared was driven away by half-witticisms.
Anyway he used to throw in a “you moron” here and there against his adversaries, while feigning a high-minded sense of decorum, e.g. “I’m the least racist poster on Queerty you moron.”
Not that there’s anything wrong with that!
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@noprah: Exactly. His mother wouldn’t be able to pick Him out of a police lineup.
the other Greg
@Guillermo3: Linus not Charlie Brown. It’s snowing here so my head is still kind of wet from walking home from work in it.
Anyway there used to be a very frequent, very excitable commenter here (whose screen name escapes me right now but I’ll think of it) who disappeared and who I’ve always feared was driven away by half-witticisms. Not my intention!
Vinaregglia
C’mon. The article is just an “actor” who has NO acting credits to his name trying to spark a little controversy in free press to get attention. He didn’t want to book it? Was he even offered it? Is it just bitter grapes? Manipulating a gay reaction for personal gain?
His ‘story’ comes on the heels of the Matt Damon interview where he said he never commented or denied the gay romance rumors between him & Ben Affleck because a denial might imply he has an issue with it & that would be offensive to his gay friends & fans.
I didn’t want to book that part on The Jeffersons. I don’t want people to think I’m black. (I wasn’t even born then but saying I didn’t want the part sounds so much better.)
So Nick. You’re no Matt Damon. Bush-bye.
Guillermo3
@the other Greg: Well,the other Greg,perhaps the rain will do the trick:Shrinking your head down to less than Great Pumpkin size! It’s snowing here in civilization,& I have to go out momentarily,but NOT to WORRY:My heads a normal size.
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: @PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: Of Course it was CHEAP,PRINCE SNARK__Why else would your title be followed by “de Bon Marche'”? As for the balls,wit,Emily Post,etc.,etc.:I’m sure that even at my advanced age I can out pube you,or Any Other 12 year-old.
t.o.G.,I’m not worried about,as he’s just informed me[and the rest of us Punks] that his head is wet.Perhaps if the same would happen to you,PRINCE de BON MARCHE’,YOU’D DRY UP.
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: 2ND RESPONSE,PRINCE:YES,Castrato!
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID de BON MARCHE’:PLEASE,PRINCE[ESS?],SPEAK UP_Your voice is unnaturally high!
Dionte
Neither am I.
Joel J
@Guillermo3: Even paranoids have enemies.
Joel J
I respect Nicholas Brown for his honesty. What more can we ask of anyone? Nicholas will have to work out his issues about homosexuality, as will the rest of us. The diversity of opinion about this article is a testament to that.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Guillermo3: I..I..I… Okay, I concede defeat! you are in a class all of your own where a bell has just signalled it is ritalin-o’clock.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Guillermo3:
OMG OMG OMFG LOOOOOOOL
WAIT!!!… NO! STILLLL IN NOOOO WAY FUNNY — well, not if you have any regard for the mentally ill.
Thank you for this window into your world; henceforth Matron should ensure that window is secured and barred.
A concerned friend.
Spike
Some how I don’t see Jane Lynch ever making the statement that even those she is lesbian and has plenty of str8t friends, appeared as str8t on TV and film, marched in str8t parades, she remains uncomfortable kissing a man on camera.
It’s called acting, if uncomfortable, don’t take the role and don’t call yourself and actor.
Guillermo3
@Joel J: Yes,Joel j,And the paranoids are OUT to GET US!!!!!!!
Guillermo3
Oh Well!I must give up,with a departing:Fuck Queerty’s Censor!
Little-Kiwi
“I don’t want people to think I’m gay. And I’m even more uncomfortable because that isn’t a thought that I want to have.”
I can only surmise that the guys on here criticizing this man chose to ignore that last sentence, which is exactly the sentence that is the most important and one that a great deal of you need to sit and ponder.
He’s saying “Wow. I’m not as progressive as i thought. I have a lot of work and learning to do about myself”
feel free to join him, boys.
Guillermo3
@Guillermo3:,@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS: As I said before:It’s retain a c*ck and:Fuck
Queerty’s censor.
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: Sincerely sorry,PRINCE! I had no idea of your condition,but hope they left a key for your jacket and that the jacket is as comfortable as can be expected.
Joel J
@Guillermo3: For someone who complains as often as you do about the Queerty censor you sure are a prolific poster. In considering the tenor of your posts, I’d hate to see the stuff that got rejected.
Guillermo3
@Joel J: Oh,Joel,[and I mean this in the nicest way possible]f8ck-off.Actually,the censored comments are the same as those which eventually get posted,but using slightly d8ffe*nt w8rding.
the other Greg
@Little-Kiwi: The last time I checked, TV commercials don’t run credits naming who the actors are. (Gee, that must really bother you – actors in TV commercials are “anonymous”!)
So who exactly is going to think he’s gay? Only people who already know him personally might, possibly, ever fall into that category.
And if they’re not gay they’re unlikely to be watching Logo which is a gay network.
Little-Kiwi
@the other Greg: Now, I know you’re not veery bright so I’ll use this as yet another opportunity to point out how stupid you are. 🙂
“who is going to think he’s gay?”
don’t ask me. ask him. and the answer will be this – he’s not sure. it’s an idea. it’s a baseless fear borne of a culture that still demeans “gay”
hence he has an irrational fear based on an already irrational negative response to the cultural stigma against homosexuality.
and as i’ve pointed out, and you plebes continue to ignore, he has the intellectual honesty to admit that he’s more bothered by his realization about his own learned prejudices.
there are gay people who refrain from showing any visible signs of affection to their partners in public, and don’t want people “on the streets” to be able to “tell” that they’re gay.
why? why worry about what complete strangers think? simple – it’s an irrational feat that those who possess the ability to interrogate themselves and their insecurities can address and overcome.
but your continued obsession with me is still flattering. especially when your overwhelming drive to argue proves what an intellectually stunted ninny you are.
😀
http://littlekiwilovesbauhaus.blogspot.ca/2012/12/x-mas-gifts-for-soul.html
a gift from my family to all of yours. celebrating the love that should keep us together.
Joel J
@the other Greg: Maybe he doesn’t want guys hitting on him if they think he is gay. I’ve had straight friends whose biggest fear about going to a gay bar is that guys will hit on them. It’s a common misperception among straight guys.
the other Greg
@Little-Kiwi: “why? why worry about what complete strangers think? simple – it’s an irrational fea[r]…”
No, Lefty told you what it’s a perfectly rational fear of.
Or do you actually think f@g-bashing is a myth and it never happens?
Just because you live in a safe place doesn’t mean every gay person does. (Your safe place wasn’t so safe in the ’80s either.)
Here’s an easy experiment for you, Raymond. Nothing is stopping you from putting your Metrocard where your mouth is. The #4, 5 & A trains are right there, you can go to both ends of each line – Bronx & Queens/non-hipster Brooklyn – kiss up a storm, do your elegant curtsies out there for the yokels and see what happens. (That is, if you can find a guy dumb enough, I mean brave enough to do this experiment with you.)
If you survive that you can go be brave in, say, Bridgeport CT, Dorchester MA and Passaic NJ, and let us know how it all turns out.
Little-Kiwi
Id say it’s not even that specific. It’s one of those “what will people think?!?!” questions that sends people into a tizzy, and yet has no real rational basis.
what will who think? and why would one care?
“what if i’m out in public and someone recognizes me and thinks that i’m gay?”
You know, the same things that Closeted gay guys tell themselves everyday to keep from doing the real work and work on Coming Out.
“What will people think?!” – that’s his worry. And as I’ve said, there are still gay men who don’t want complete strangers on the street to “be able to tell” or “know” that they’re gay. And why? Why care about a stranger?
and again, his biggest concern is not that people will think that he’s gay, but that he’s actually concerned about such a thing in the first place.
Joel J
@Little-Kiwi: Yes, the first step to overcoming our prejudices is to admit that we have them.
Little-Kiwi
Greg – already done it. Have been involved in more than a few public “kiss-in protests” all over NYC with the action group Queer Rising.
http://queerrising.wordpress.com/past-actions/
I get it, though. You’re an anonymous coward and are furious at other gay men who aren’t.
Not my problem that you never grew balls, sugarpie.
you’re pretty fun. hopefully you’ll either man up in 2013 or finally O.D. on meth already 😀
the other Greg
@Joel J: !!! – Hadn’t considered that, could be.
I thought of the well-known “Effeminate Heterosexual” episodes of both “Sex & the City” (with Dan Futterman, a straight actor) and “Curb Your Enthusiasm” (forget the actor’s name but he was funny) and wondered if Nicholas Brown is maybe worried about some combination of his looks, usual (non-acting) mannerisms and… something else?
Little-Kiwi
no matter where i go, this boy wears his rainbow bracelets with pride
i get it, Other Greg, you’re a wimp and have to tell yourself that no other gay people have the balls to live and do what yourself cannot. but you’re wrong.
you’re free to remain an anonymous little coward who despises those of us with spines. won’t make your own life better. won’t make our lives worse.
😀
i’ve been the victim of ant-gay violence. it didnt’ send me running and screaming back into the Closet to hide. Quite the opposite. It’s what galvanized me to be more visible.
fight or flight, ya idiot 🙂
i’m a fighter. you’re a coward. you’re welcome, btw,, for all that i and others do that your @ss isn’t man enough to.
Guillermo3
The unbelievable number of comments on this post(including most of mine,Censored and Un-censored) is BEYOND SILLY!!!! WHY HAVE WE WASTED SO MUCH TIME ON A THESPIAN N0N-ENTITY of whom no one has ever heard?
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Guillermo3: Aww bless you, sausage, you really are a tonic
— as in catatonic.
Vinaregglia
His ‘resume” is posted on his self-promotion site.
His student films & workshops. He played Me1, Me2 & Me3 in a film interviewing himself.
He didn’t say he WAS being honest.
Saying I have gay friends? Seriously? Can I make racially demeaning comments because I have black friends, Chinese friends, Indian friends? I could but does that mean I should get praise? No!
Would he even be saying this if he wasn’t just using it as self-promotion?
Little-Kiwi
@Vinaregglia: you need to breathe and re-read what he wrote.
he’s not saying “i have gay friends and i don’t want people to think that i’m gay”
he’s saying “despite having gay friends, and having marched in the pride parades, i’m disappointed in myself for still having fears in me that are a result of anti-gay culture”
seriously.
now – TV. film. meaning your face is out there for potential millions to see and thus associate with “gay”.
are the commenters on here to be just as visible? put your own face out there as a GAY MAN in a way that it could potentially be seen by millions of people?
if you yourself are not (yet) comfortable enough to do that, what position are you in to criticize this man for the same thing?
http://www.toptobottomnyc.com/2012/07/the-voice-of-reason-interview-with.html
the other Greg
@Little-Kiwi: Those are CROWDS. Try doing it one-on-one on any of those trains after midnight.
I’ve been f@g-bashed twice and I wasn’t doing anything, just walking along minding my own business (not at 4am either). So yeah, maybe I’m not terribly enthusiastic about going out of my way, except in a pretty safe place, to make my gayness obvious. Sue me.
So what? Do I have an obligation to do that? Why?
We all have an obligation to come out to our families. Practically everyone on Queerty would agree to that at this point. (After I’ve driven a couple of them away, I think! – I enjoyed some arguments about that.) And it’s nice if you can come out to co-workers. Well, maybe not so much in 30 or so states where you can be fired. But even the work thing is “gravy.”
And other than that, we have no obligations. Just because Pope Kiwi says so doesn’t make it so.
Guillermo3
@Little-Kiwi: Not very nice,Little Kiwi! the other Greg can’t help it if he/she is a ninny! After all:It’s in the genes,rather like being gay.
OTHER SUBJECT: I went to your blogsite,but,techno-tard that I am,can’t figure out how to sign up for future delivery.
Sweet pictures of your family,though.
HAPPY NEW YEAR to EVERYONE!!(Including PRINCE OF SNARKNESS)!!
Joel J
@Guillermo3: The guys are working out their personal issues of being gay in a straight world. AND you keep stirring the pot.
Little-Kiwi
greg – done it. i don’t hide, ever. i get it – you do, because you’re a wimp.
i’m not a wimp. you’re free to be one, for whatever excuses you make up, but don’t project your cowardice onto me.
i don’t live in a state of fear like you choose to.
yes. you have no obligations. you’re more than free to make cowardly self-serving choices and contribute to a culture of achingly-slow progress.
since that’s what you do, kindly STFU about the work the rest of us with balls and spines are doing.
you are pretty funny, though. in a sad and pathetic kind of way.
goweho
Wow Kiwi you are a quite a work. Out people living in conservative areas who choose to live more private lives are less brave than nobody internally homophobic actors who are too scared to kiss other members of the same sex (even though they have friends and have the so-caleld balls to admit it and all that rubbish).
So this actor has all this bravery and god I am so honored to see straight people like this, while all the other plebes on this site are cowards and eunuchs for criticizing Mr. Bull-balls Brown.
I’m not buying it. Every one of the 100 posters on this site have bigger cojones than two-ton Brown for the sake of putting out their opinion on a gay site. I respect them more than I ever would an actor who is too scared to play-act an anonynous kiss… even if he says so.
the other Greg
@Little-Kiwi: “i’ve been the victim of ant-gay violence
[not much I bet]
it didnt’ send me running and screaming back into the Closet to hide. Quite the opposite. It’s what galvanized me to be more visible.”
That’s nice, and so what? It has the opposite effect on many people.
I’m not in the closet, I’m out to my family, I’m out at, well, 2 of 3 p/t jobs. And that’s all I have to do.
The internet is not “real life” no matter how much Pope Kiwi declares it so. I grew up in the ’70s, have no particular interest in computers, & hardly use them at work. Sue me. As I’ve said before, I started posting here to correct certain people’s disturbingly inaccurate HIV misconceptions.
None of us are required to have an internet presence no matter much Pope Kiwi demands that we do.
goweho
BTW- Its not courage but social chauvenism to pretend that everyone everywhere in the world must act in an ACT-UP! fashion in public, especially if you live in a gay ghetto. Gay ghetto chauvenism doesn’t make up for ensuring security for yourself, your family, your children and your reputation. Ensuring your children aren’t caught in the crossfire of a gay-bashing is a smart, not cowardly thing to do.
Little-Kiwi
@goweho: you are also not very smart.
what did this actor say? that he’s ashamed that he still worries about people knowing that he’s gay.
he’s not proud of it. he’s ashamed of it.
step one in overcoming your insecurities is acknowledging them.
which he’s just done.
seriously, were all of you idiots on here homeschooled?
yeah. they put their opinions on a site. ANONYMOUSLY.
can any of you Bitter Betty’s put a face to your comments? so far, doesn’t look like it.
what’s your excuse? you’re not comfortable with everyone knowing that you’re gay?
aint that ironic.
😉
but again, try not to prove how stupid you are, “goweho” – he’s not saying “i’m proud of not wanting people to think i’m gay” – he’s literally saying he’s ashamed of that insecurity of his.
the other Greg
I’m calling bullsh*t –
Kiwi is always accusing everyone here of making things up and having “online personae” etc. and now he CLAIMS to have been “the victim of ant-gay [sic] violence.”
Really, 8th grade doesn’t count!
@goweho: See Steve Buscemi in “Parting Glances” – his FIRST role! – 1986!
Little-Kiwi
@the other Greg:
yes. nobody has to have an Internet Presence. Just as this guy doesn’t want to be mistaken for “gay” for the exact same reasons that the complaining wimps on this thread don’t want people to know that they’re (actually) gay.
it’s just pathetically ironic that all of the guys on here criticizing this actor give the same stupid cowardly excuses to not be as Visible.
oh yeah. you don’t have to show yourselves. because you’re scared of what might happen to you. just like, perhaps, he is.
you boys should pray for some balls and spines in 2013.
goweho
Being a devi@Little-Kiwi: Being a devil’s advocate for the sake of being a devil’s advocate might make you think you are the right-hand man for a king, but in reality makes you nothing more than a clown.
Little-Kiwi
greg, keep moving goalposts. won’t change the fact that you overdosing on meth would be the best belated Xmas gift to your family 😀
Little-Kiwi
@goweho: it’s not devil’s advocate. it’s literally right there in his own words.
seriously. were y’all homeschooled or is the US education system really so poor that your reading comprehension skills are that lacking?
“I don’t want people to think I’m gay. And I’m even more uncomfortable because that isn’t a thought that I want to have.”
Are you guys literally so stupid that you can’t understand what that last sentence means?
goweho
@Little-Kiwi: I understand that is your fallback position when you have nothing better to say. And I don’t give him props for saying it. That’s where we disagree, so what? A no-name actor gets lots of attention, as do those ass-kissers who think he’s a brave man for doing it.
the other Greg
@goweho: Yeah, Kiwi’s response to his long-ago (& no doubt minor) childhood bullying is always – to be a bully to other gay people in adulthood.
@Little-Kiwi: “Keep moving goalposts” ? – oh you admit you’ve never been the victim of REAL anti-gay violence in adulthood, anything that required hospital treatment, anything like that.
Phony.
Joel J
The gay solidarity on this site is underwhelming. I assume we all share a common interest in men, however we each come from a different set of life experiences and that is bound to affect how we view Nicholas Brown and each other. Could we have a little empathy for a change, or would that be too boring on this side of the window?
goweho
@the other Greg: Sometimes bullying looks more like court jestering, which adds nothing more to conversation than mild entertainment. When people use the broadest strokes to categorize people its hard to take them serious. I highly doubt everyone here is illiterate or closet cases.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
What’s the latest update. Has he overcome it yet. With just Hours to go before 2013 will he make it. I am certainly rooting for him. #TeamRandomActorDude
@Guillermo3:
Baby come and git yo’self some sugar you sweet ole’ thing you. H/NY
Xx
the other Greg
@Little-Kiwi: ““I don’t want people to think I’m gay. And I’m even more uncomfortable because that isn’t a thought that I want to have.”
Why are you so impressed with that? He’s such a bad writer, unfortunately, that it’s not even clear in his blog post if he ACTUALLY TOOK THE PART OR NOT. But I hope he did, after all this fuss!
As I told you before, WHO is going to think that he’s gay anyway? TV commercials DO NOT HAVE CREDITS.
As some other posters in this thread (not me) have said, maybe he’s worried about that because he’s “really” gay.
He probably only wrote it to get attention anyway. Oh, kinda like what you do.
Little-Kiwi
@the other Greg: got the stitches on my right arm to prove it.
but again, i could provide all the proof in the world. you’ll still move the goalposts and try to find a new angle to make strawman arguments about. that’s what your kind does. makes s**t up, and when you get your @sses handed to you, you move the goalposts.
and how can we “disagree”, weho?
his words are right there. he clearly states that he’s “even more uncomfortable” with his realization of his own anti-gay insecurities.
there’s no room to agree or disagree about something that simply IS – he clearly stated his biggest disappointment is that he’s not as progressive as he feels he should be.
he’s admitted to being ashamed of his own insecurity about “people thinking he’s gay”
and in a glorious twist of irony that is apparently lost on the cowards who comment on this site, he’s being criticized by a bunch of gay men who ALSO refuse to put a public face to themselves as GAY for the very same reasons.
good god, you boys are doomed for life. capers for testes. the lot of ya.
goweho
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: I’m not going to hold my breath… although a New Year’s Day update might have him high on coke grinding with a porno star at some club in WEHO. I’m not hoping for it, but if I heard it I wouldn’t bat a false eyelash!
Little-Kiwi
@the other Greg:
you yourself don’t want people to be able to “tell” that you’re gay in case you get “gaybashed again”
moving. goalposts.
i answered your question. you chose to ignore it because it proved you wrong. no wonder ry dumped you.
Little-Kiwi
@goweho: perhaps the commenters on here could prove they’re not by, you know, putting a public face as a gay man to their comments?
*crickets crickets*
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: Thanks PRINCE de BON MARCHE’!! AT MY AGE,my sausage needs a lot of blessing.
As for Catatonic:How can you drink any tonic while wrapped in your straight-jacket?Do they give it to you through a feeding tube,or intravenously? I know what you mean though,PRINCE:Your comments bring on my narcolepsy.
Anyway:HAPPY NEW YEAR!
goweho
@Little-Kiwi: *sigh* I disagree with you personally. You have a degree of opinion that Two-balls Brown is brave, while I do not. You believe he is a few steps ahead of everyone in this forum because of his admission, I do not. The disagreement is not with his statement, its with you and your backwards view that he is brave. I can disagree with you on this point and I will, and in fact I will continue to disagree regardless of how far you keep moving the goalpost yourself. Just sayin.
the other Greg
@Joel J: “Could we have a little empathy for a change, or would that be too boring on this side of the window?”
How dare you, “you anonymous coward!” – “put a face to your comments!” 🙂
You’ll have to direct that more directly to the anti-gay bully hypocrite here, who happens, very tangentially, to be gay!…
…unless perhaps you’re referring to the Guillermo / Prince of Snarkness sideshow.
Little-Kiwi
that doesn’t make any sense.
his statement is that he’s disappointed in himself for still harbouring an anti-gay insecurity, and you’re being a typical cowardly troll by choosing to flatly ignore that to disagree with me.
it’s guys like you who always pick the wrong battles for the wrong reasons and wonder why all these years have gone by and your family is still ashamed to have you for a son.
HINT: it’s because you pick the wrong battles for the wrong reasons.
Guillermo3
@Joel J: THAT would be NICE,Joel !!!(Sadly}not likely to happen,though).
But please don’t forget the sympathy/empathy between women who like women,women who linemen,men & women who like both,and transgendered whomever they like.
PEACE!
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: Thanks PRINCE! But how do I know what you look like?
the other Greg
@Little-Kiwi: “his statement is that he’s disappointed in himself for still harbouring an anti-gay insecurity,”
Well come on, how do you know he’s even sincere about that? Maybe that’s just his “online persona”!
He may have just made it up to have a hook for the article.
Guillermo3
@the other Greg: That’s Guillermo3,the other Greg! But,Sideshow?! I thought the PRINce and I were the Main Event!
Anyway: HAPPY NEW YEAR!! (AND:To all the other Queers,Bi-s,and Transes here too!) Hope you and Little Kiwi get your problems ironed out!
goweho
@Little-Kiwi: Gret. Now I’m picking the wrong battles for my personal opinions and my family has disowned me. What will I do now? Oh yes! Wow! I didn’t read that one line that has been pushed in my face 80 times today! Good gracious two-ball Brown is a saint! I’m healed, Hallelejuh, daddy love me now.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Guillermo3:
Your humour skills are improving, my friend. I am glad to be able to supply the whetstone to your rapier wit. Baby steps first, though, but we’ll get there… possibly in 2013. I see it as my challenge for the coming year.
Toodles
goweho
Feelin the love finally. Lets all sing Auld Lang Syne before this post hits 200!
Guillermo3
@Joel J: I should hope so,Joel:That’s my job!! Unfortunately,it’s difficult for me to stir the pot,as I ran out of the stuff years ago.
Happy New Year[or whatever the Evangelicals & Republicans allow in Texas]!!!
the other Greg
It’s interesting how Kiwi automatically TRUSTS the statements of a straight actor about his totally INTERNAL and utterly unprovable thoughts, attitudes, feelings regarding gayness, etc….
… yet Kiwi automatically DISTRUSTS anything any actual gay person says here.
Guillermo3
@goweho: Your comment to Kiwi is hilarious,goweho!! But I wish your grammar and spelling were better.
Anyway: Happy New Year!
My New Year’s Wish?_That we stop insulting each other/stop trying to OUT-MISERY each other on this site!
goweho
@the other Greg: Both Brown and Kiwi are opportunists. Brown is easy, but limited sleuthing will bourne Kiwi out. Any takers?
the other Greg
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: @Guillermo3: @goweho: Enjoyed it!
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID:”the quality fell off”,PRINCE?WHAT Quality?!
Guillermo3
@Little-Kiwi: Play NICE,now,Little Kiwi! Besides:Mine are at least the size of over-stuffed grape leaves!
Guillermo3
@the other Greg: Great t o Greg!! We aim to please!!!
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: Thanks,PRINCE de BONMARCHE’!!!
MY ONLY CONCERN IS THAT YOU’LL HAVE DIFFICULTY HOLDING YOUR WHET-STONE WHILE YOU’RE IN THAT STRAIGHT JACKET.
the other Greg
@goweho: Ha – tho I’m sure it could be done, that sounds exhausting, I don’t even click on 98% of his own links as it is.
It’s funny – I don’t ever recall him declaring he was an actor before THIS thread. Not that I’m dubious, he’s in NY and that’s common as bagels, but he’d never mentioned it before. His insistence that everyone provide pix (& a bio?) just baffles me. It sounds kind of show-biz come to think of it. Maybe he aims to work in casting? Actually, once one guy here linked to a bio, if not a pic, and of course Kiwi bullied him. (The guy was a gay Republican so it was hard to feel sorry for him! – but I still called Kiwi out on his hypocrisy & he went ballistic like here.) Maybe he just wants pix of us all so he can make fun of our looks, or how old we are etc., who knows.
The World’s Nastiest Anglo-Canadian! – counters all the stereotypes!
goweho
Queerty add like buttons!!!
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Little-Kiwi:
How will de-anonymizing oneself to randoms on the Internet materially alter the price of gay fish?
Not an attack. Just interested. This being a signature style with you. Along with leitmotiv of testicles. It’s a good look btw.
Be kind, I scare easily.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Guillermo3:
Oh dear and I had such hopes for you. How did you fall off so quickly. Has our encounter taught you nothing?
Auntie, I think you should sit this one out ’till a slower tune comes along.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
In conclusion what’s his face actor dude doesn’t say anything THAT terribly offensive but neither does he say ANYTHING worthy of praise let alone an article and certainly not nearly 200 comments on a low rent blog full of thoroughly despicable sausage jockeys whose bitter asses I nevertheless adore.
And you knowz I meanz it gurlz.
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: OH,PRINCE-ess!!Of Course our encounter has taught me NOTHING that I didn’t already know.But how could an encounter with you teach ANYONE ANYTHING?! Unless,
obviously,the encounter were physical,but most of us have experienced DISAPPOINTMENT & REVULSION before.
I’m no one’s Aunt,but perhaps you were thinking of your brother?
LOVE!
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Guillermo3: Oh you’ll know it’s me by the nightvision goggles bucket with the lotion in it and used skin suit of my victims.
Guillermo3
@goweho: YES!!!!,goweho! Great idea!_Also Hate and Laugh buttons.
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: Yes,PRINCESSS,But make that “Toodle-eewh!”
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Guillermo3: o..k , um, why did you bring my brother into this?
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@goweho: LOL! True dawg.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Guillermo3: Congratulations, so you read about my family situation I posted earlier in the week when I was emtionally vulnerable and use it to try to hurt me. Enjoy the moment. I actually quite liked you on low. But this?
See you around.
Ken
What does it matter? His emotional state is his own business, and his confession is both unnecessary and brave. His conduct is what counts.
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: WTF?!!?,PRINCESS?
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: Well,PRINCESS,I thought he might very well be your Aunt_After all,it’s widely rumored that your parents were blood relatives! As wronged wived used to say of their husbands in S.Carolina,”Thank God he’s nota blood relation!”
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: PRINCE,In what language were you writing?
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: PRINCE,I have NO IDEA what you’re talking about!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! @!!!#$!
I don’t remember reading about any thing you[or anyone else,for that matter] posted about your/her/his family situation & I didn’t suggest that your brother might be your aunt or your parents blood relations until very recently.
SORRY,If I offended,even though unwittingly.
ON A SERIOUS NOTE:I certainly hope that you weren’t a victim of incest,or sexual abuse[and deeply regret it and sympathize with you if you were]! There’s a great thing that started here in Philadelphia [and has gone national] called Survivors[Survivors.org].
Again,HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: CENSORED BY QUEERTY’s sh*t-eating auto-censor[who should get F*ked with glass shards,sharp ones] again,PRINCE!! To recap[hopefully with more luck this time]:
I am SORRY I OFFENDED, BUT HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU MEAN__I’ve not read in these posts[or anywhere else,recently]
about your,or anyone else’s family situation.If I offended,it was completely unwittingly.I DO HOPE that you weren’t a victim of family abuse,and am sincerely sorry and sympathetic if you were.
Again: HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Guillermo3
@QUEERTY CENSOR: ONCE AGAIN}EAT SHIT,GET FUCKED WITH HIV+GLASS SHARDS & DIE.
Guillermo3
@Guillermo3: I’d love to see Queerty’s f*ck-head censor print my original comment!
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: PRINCE,Would you kindly tell me which comment[s] of mine you are referring to?Knowing where to find your post about your family situation would help too.
Thanks,
Guillermo3
Czar
Interesting topic & conversation.
I didn’t put my sexuality out in public. But never created any illusion either. I did defense work (DoD) & was outted at work for who I associated with, a lesbian. Two really but they did not know each other. Once or twice a week at least my name was graffiti in a bathroom. Crazy but in a heart with one of the lesbians name. It was the first time there was graffiti where I worked.
Regular vandalism. Glue in my desk locks, stuff taken, chair messed with, toolboxes turned upside down, it kept on. I never said a single word but the time I spent putting my workspace together didn’t go unnoticed. I got called to the chiefs office one day. The chief-4 levels of mgt above me-was also a minister & pastor. I sweat that walk. He asked about the harassment & vandalism, but not about my personal life. He asked if I’d like to be reassigned away from that & into a more secure & isolated area. I said I would prefer for that not to happen, I don’t want my career effected, limited or restricted by hiding away. I’ll deal with it, maybe they will get tired. The chief said he was glad to hear that. He felt he needed to offer, would do it without thinking badly of me, but thought doing it was bad for me (as a person).
Prior to any of this I frequently volunteered for unique assignments, assignments that because they were unique made it hard to go unnoticed. The physical harassment stopped but the tension stuck around, generally low-key for about 3 years. When new hires come in they get a mentor they work with awhile. I had one too. Mentors are assigned by mgt. It was my turn & I got a young, very attractive girl (19). She stood out. The first girl in a dept of guys. She felt being ogled. She picked up on my situation & just asked me. I was her first. Haha. Because a (girl) friend of hers cancelled she asked me to go on an island vacation with her, sharing the room. That restarted & cranked up the harassment. We were testing out how we would be together outside of work. Shopping (for her), a few clubs, a male review.
Somebody made a remark meant to be insulting & embarrass me in front of her after we got back. Kind of stupid, apparently she had no issues with me. I just ignored it but she got angry & called him on it. But still got some attitude for awhile. I transferred to a new location. She & I remain friends.
One weekend I did get attacked after leaving a gay club. Six guys kicked me down. Broke my skull, nose, jaw, hands, both eye sockets. Over 100 contusions to my torso & slit both my eyes (hard contacts in). Both eyes sort of glued/gooed shut & bandaged closed for awhile-so temporarily blind. When I could go back to work my appearance seemed to stop the abuse. That club, where I was before the attack-the door swung open & 3 malatov cocktails thrown
I was seeing someone awhile ago. I took him to company the company picnic. We were not together too long when I got a call. A US military colonel. He was part of a location protection team that travelled with the President of the United States. He made an attempt at suicide on White House property. Weapon/sidearm. Disarmed, he was committed to a secure US military psychiatric ward. This went on during DADT. After the attempt he had to put my name onto paperword. I’m not sure how I was listed, but the facility/ward, required that he had a contact number. He was not out to his mother yet. His father was successful committing suicide the way. To visit, more paperwork including releasing his hippa privacy rights allowing me to be informed of his situation. I visited him 5-6 days a week. It’s a little scary, 4 levels of being checked each time I visited. They wanted sharpies & any alcohol base products (Mouthwash). I got briefed & told what to do if there was trouble. Beyond the psyche staff seeing me visit, ( bring fast food for each meal) & played backgammon. But they sometimes drugged him down because he was misbehaving. Others from his team & Chief Officer, a few agency guys visited
He did manage to escape. The Conolel called where I work. I had to give him the site security.telephone no. My car was inside the fence. He confirmed my address & said to wait there. Don’t go directly, 2 MP’s will be there. They will search your place before you go in. Wait for them to signal that I can leave my car.
To get on-site you must provide proper ID
So Nicholas I do not believe your article. You’re only stirring the spot of self promotion.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Guillermo3:
NVM. I overreacted.
Since you ask: http://www.queerty.com/nyt-writer-frank-bruni-on-his-fathers-journey-to-acceptance-20121226/
And yes, I am embarrassed about writing that. And about accusing you. happy New Year. And may we all find what we are looking for.
PS I have also changed my mind about ActorDude who I now appreciate is like soooo sensitive and that makes Him HOT!!! I think he should win a combined TonyOscarG.L.A.A.D Award. Can it be very long before she is offered a Damehood for her services to the acting profession and homo-appreciating.
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: @PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: Lord,PRINCE! You certainly put my head,heart,and soul through a wringer!!! Which is what I hate about the ‘net and my addiction to it:So much virtual[but real]emotion/interaction.open,
Thanks for sending me that QUEERTY article! I had glanced at it,but hadn’t read the comments.Such a sad,tragic story!And you were right about trying to keep channels open,however tenuous:Recently a colleague of mine died[at a young age_late 50s,I think].He was thrown out of his house when he came out t his family,slept on door steps for a year,then began a life of wandering,achieving some success as a photographer.He was so cut off from his surviving family that there was no one to claim his body.Eventually some of his students and former colleagues at the school where we both taught held a memorial for him.Another guy I know[through Queerty] was similarly thrown out at 15,or 16,became a hustler in San Francisco,survived that and was able to go to college and graduate school.One despairs of
families,who supposedly love us,ever becoming accepting of us and of a part of us that really isn’t very important.
I see,PRINCE,that you maintain your snark!Your bit about accepting the “Actor Dude” is hilarious and completely unbelievable!
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Guillermo3:
🙂 Careful now, we’re in danger of becoming friends and that wouldn’t do at all!
Now go about your business you vile cantankerous ole’ reprobate you! ;-p
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
just checking in…has ActorDudes’ hives gone down yet? Please inform of further developments.
#ComeOnSensativeActorDudeYouCanDoIt
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
To S.A.D /STOP/ am presently writing SensitiveActorDude: the musical /STOP/ Would offer lead role /STOP/ Not sure you comfortable around cast /STOP/ Alternatively you consider xmas elf? /STOP/
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
SensitiveActorDude: The Musical.
Now booking
(Please note: you will be frisked for dildos and buttplugs)
pierre
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: @Guillermo3: You all need to get a life.
Guillermo3
@pierre: Probably,Pissoir,and you need to STFU!
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: Thanks,PRINCE!! I don’t accept compliments easily[bribes are good,though,and readily accepted],but I can’t ignore,can’t help but treasure this one!
ONCE AGAIN:HAPPY NEW YEAR!,ASSHOLE!
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: PRINCE/STOP/TOO LATE:David Sedaris did the elf thing(and probably did the things of other elves) YEARS AGO.
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: Wonderful,PRINCE!! If the guards are cute,have good hands,and search for plugs digitally,this could be a great sensual experience!!
ONE PROBLEM:The search experience could easily overshadow the stage performance.Let’s hope it doesn’t close in opening try-outs in Buffalo or Philadelphia!
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: Is this a #Gayboy Problem,PRINCE??
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
@Guillermo3: Ever feel like you’re the last one dancing at the party I think we better go before the ugly lights come on.
#LetsTakeItToTheParkingLot
Outta here, bye.
Guillermo3
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: WHICH PARKING LOT,PRINCE ?!
HOPE PIERRE WON’T BE THERE.
Little-Kiwi
@PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID: simple: it’s very easy for people to boastfully criticize others from the anonymity of the internet, without ever showing (via example, IE, URL) their own work that they’re doing.
here’s a story about a young actor who admits that not only is he not comfortable kissing a man on camera, but that he’s even MORE upset about that discomfort of his. the realization that he’s nowhere near as progressive and secure as he thought, and would like to be.
and ….this ever-so-important detail is lost on most commenters.
Guillermo3
@Little-Kiwi: You’re right,Kiwi!
NOW,Let’s pust this Zombie of post comments to rest….But first,tell me ,
please,how to sign up for your blogs’ post!!!!
the other Greg
What irony that Little Kiwi is such a self-hating homophobe that he automatically BELIEVES a straight actor’s unlikely and utterly unprovable bullsh*t about his wholly internal thoughts & feelings – IE, URL etc. evidence being an existential impossibility in that case. Of course, that’s something demanded only of all those GAY men out there whom he HATES.
“Changing the goalposts”? Like declaring (with no evidence, since no evidence is possible) that everyone here has an “irrational fear,” but after being reminded what the rational fear is, says oh well that should make you more energized not less (changing the subject from his original point, changing the goalposts); then he lies and says he was bashed too or as he prissily puts it, “victim of violence.” Not likely.
Like being reminded that “kiss-in” projects, however laudable & fun, are CROWDS and have nothing to do with what 99% of gay people deal with in real life, outside the gay ghetto. Oh well, so what, change the subject again.
“it’s guys like you who always pick the wrong battles for the wrong reasons…” Like spending almost ALL his time here attacking and bullying other gay men! Because he hates gay men and worships the most cartoonish aspects of straight masculinity.
Joel J
@the other Greg: It’s a new year. Why don’t you turn over a new leaf? You obviously have a thing for Kiwi otherwise you wouldn’t be keeping him on the hook.
Guillermo3
@Joel J: Shut Up,Joel!:He’s Mine.
Joel J
@Guillermo3: Go back to bed and dream on.
Guillermo3
@Joel J: Joel J:Been there/Done That,you Texas/Jersey yahoo.
Guillermo3
@the other Greg: t o Greg,I don’t know Little Kiwi,outside of his comments here and his blog sites,but if you have actually SEEN,or READ either,you would know that he is }a little snarky,a bit self-promoting[maybe],but anything but a homophobe.
the other Greg,you always seem to have a beef }Maybe you should give it a rest for a while.
the other Greg
@Joel J: @Guillermo3: Don’t let him bully you into becoming a groveling sycophant.
Maybe HE could give it a rest for awhile, stop calling me a meth addict, etc.? (Funny when his spelling, syntax, punctuation etc. are so atrocious, hmph!)
His “work,” come on. What exactly does his “work” consist of?: snarling online about how much he HATES 99.5% of the gay men who actually exist. There’s a term for that: SELF-HATING HOMOPHOBE.
the other Greg
@Joel J: @Guillermo3: He’s not fooling anyone with that pit bull either.
As everyone knows, any guy with a pit bull is over-compensating for having a small penis. Freud wrote about it someplace. 🙂
the other Greg
@Joel J: @Guillermo3: Since you’re both relatively new here, I should mention to you what my work is. I’m in a sero-discordant relationship and we do HIV education and help HIV+ people with practical stuff out here in the sticks in New England. It’s usually pretty dull, but occasionally fun & rewarding. There are obvious reasons (or would be obvious, to anyone sane!) why pix, etc. would be detrimental and even dangerous to our work. HIV is a touchy subject and aside from being life-threatening per se, disclosure can be life-threatening too.
LK over the years has been not only unsympathetic, but utterly contemptuous about all this: snarls about my “imaginary boyfriend” (huh?), and says he doesn’t give a sh*t about ANY gay person living in “bumfuck nowhere” (!), which pretty much negates ANY “advice” he has for the vast majority of the Queerty readership. Oh we get it: he’s a fraud who’s content to throw poo from his safe perch in the gay ghetto.
He accuses me and others of having “online personae,” which is hilarious. Really, if I wanted to have an online persona, wouldn’t I come up with something more glamorous than THIS? 🙂 Jeez, I haven’t even owned a car since the ’80s. I’ll be sure to give myself a car in my “online persona”!
The funny thing is – absolutely no one has ever taken him up on his DEMAND to provide video proof of existence, and so on. This includes even his groveling sycophants; none of them have done it either. (Amusingly, he never seems to notice this.)
The even funnier thing is – Queerty really doesn’t give a sh*t if anyone DOES have an “online persona.” You could have an online persona all you want, for all they care. (Not that anyone seems to really have one; he’s the only one paranoid and crazy enough to suspect such things.) It’s not Little Kiwi’s site, it’s Queerty’s site, so why is he always trying to run it? He can try minding his own fucking business once in awhile, which as far as I can see, consists of hating gay men because he’s a nasty, vicious, hypocritical, self-hating homophobe.
Little-Kiwi
and yet, i don’t make my comments from a place of anonymity. and you do 🙂
yes. i’m such a self-hating homophobe. riiiight 😉
as for the “proof” thing, it’s very simple: there are some things, some specific things, that only Closet Cases Say. Boasts and claims that can only be made by cowards who lie via an anonymous internet handle.
call their bluff? you get their excuses.
and pitbulls are a loyal, loving and misunderstood breed of dog that for too long have been owned and mistreated by terrible owners. many people adopt and rescue pitbulls to give them the structured and loving homes they deserve.
🙂
an actor expresses his disappointment in his own insecurities about being perceived as gay and the idiots come on to show how stupid they are by criticizing him for being as afraid of being “seen” as gay for the same reason(s) they’re afraid of being seen as gay.
oh, tis irony.
Joel J
@the other Greg: Gee, no one has ever accused me of sychophancy before today. Fancy, maybe. Your gross, exaggerated overstatements undermine any claim to objectivity you may make. Af far as gay seduction is concerned, I admit I’m easy and Guillermo3, well, She Stoops to Conquer.
the other Greg
@Little-Kiwi: “and yet, i don’t make my comments from a place of anonymity. and you do ”
SO WHAT? WHO CARES? Queerty doesn’t care. Almost everybody here is “anonymous,” including your groveling sycophants, and INCLUDING YOU. It’s not obvious, even now, to newcomers, what your first name is. I asked you point blank what your first name was and you ignored me for a year, you phony!
I just TOLD you, yet again, what my reason is for a certain degree of “anonymity.” It’s a good one and I have no intention of putting the lives of people around here in danger just because some hypocritical self-hating homophobe in the gay ghetto petulantly demands it. GO FUCK YOURSELF.
At any rate, it’s not your site. Mind your own fucking business! You don’t even have that rule on your OWN site, you hypocrite.
“an actor expresses his disappointment in his own insecurities…” blah blah blah
Hey, genius – SO WHAT, HE’S LYING! For the benefit of the pseudo-liberal putzes of the Atlantic Monthly. You only believe him because he’s straight (or claims to be!) and because you’re a self-hating homophobe whose automatic response to everything is to hate 99.5% of the gay men who exist.
I’ll apologize for the pit bull remark if you’ll ever apologize for ANY of the hateful, vicious, sexist, self-hating homophobic remarks you’ve made to me & others in the past two years.
@Joel J: Sorry, I’ve been putting up with his hypocritical BULLYING for two years and I’ve had enough. Please don’t fall for it.
the other Greg
How many closeted readers has Little Kiwi driven to suicide with his hateful invective against gay men?
Guillermo3
@Joel J: Thanks,Joel J,but I always thought it was:”She Stops to Queer”.
Guillermo3
@the other Greg: TOG[because the other Greg takes too much time to type!]:
1):WHAT ANTI-GAY INVECTIVE????? I’m convinced that you see what you want to see.
2):Obviously,LK hasn’t driven enough[if any] readers,closeted,or not to suicide:YOU,TOG,are still commenting.
NOW DRINK YOUR DRANO & SHUT UP.
Guillermo3
@the other Greg: TOG:WHAT BULLYING? PLEASE!:CHILL,TAKE YOUR MEDS!
Guillermo3
@the other Greg: TOG:LITTLE KIWI posted his blogs and web-sites[several times].
LOOK at them,READ them. If you do,you will see that he’s no great beauty[just average] and that he loves his family.
I admire the work you say that you do,but YOU,TOG are an asshole.
Joel J
@Guillermo3: Better and asshole than a suckass.
Guillermo3
@Joel J: Joel J: 1]Why? 2]Who? I know nothing of TOG’s asshole,and with any luck,never shall.
the other Greg
@Guillermo3: My objection to LK is that he spends ALL his time attacking other gay men.
Why? He does this because it’s the easy way out and because that’s what bullies do.
At best (and it’s rarely “at best”), this is a lazy way of badgering other gay men via the internet into doing some (unspecified) “work” that he’s not doing himself, because he’s too busy bullying other gay men.
And believe me, regular readers have heard way too much already about his magical superhero parents, and for that matter his bizarre dumbfuck parental theories, blah blah blah blah blah, yada yada yada!
If only he spent one-tenth as much of his energy attacking straight homophobia as he does attacking imaginary gay “anonymity” (a non-problem that only he perceives), and bullying other gay men, he’d have solved all the problems of the gay world by now.
the other Greg
@Guillermo3: And again, “G3” – I’m finally snapping in reaction to over two years of this hateful, hypocritical bullying and bullsh*t.
Guillermo3
@the other Greg: @the other Greg:
Maybe so,TOG.You’ve been reading/posting on QUEERTY much longer than I have.I only came to it after the old[now sadly pale]GayNews from Gay Agenda was transformed int QUEERTY. From what I’ve seen,over the last year,or so, there are far worse viciously hateful[frequently pegged by other readers as self-hating closet cases] homophobes here.
Perhaps you are right/perhaps you are delusional.As as late-comer to digi-world,I’ve learned that the ‘net is a mysterious,DANGEROUS place,where miscommunication is easier than ever.Facebook seems to be the most treacherous place.
the other Greg
@Guillermo3: Thanks for calming down (after the “Drano” talk, yikes). Heh, I intend never to find out about Facebook but really, it’s “treacherous”? Uck.
But actually, in a way I think you have it exactly backwards. The internet is just pixels on a screen and you shouldn’t take it too seriously.
Imagine for a moment that the pseudonymous character “Little Kiwi” were less, um… insulting and cantankerous, but still always trying to badger other readers into doing work that he wasn’t doing. Which is a major feature of internet sites! Maybe especially the gay ones.
So who is the enemy here?
Little Kiwi looks for the enemy here and the usual enemy he sees is – other gay men.
What does his “work” consist of? Bashing (metaphorically speaking) other gay men.
If the internet hadn’t been invented yet, what would he be doing? Apparently, nothing.
goweho
@the other Greg: I promised I wouldn’t be a part of taking this post to 300, but now that’s broken. I think you are onto something here. If the internet wasn’t here, would he be as nasty to everyone in the gay ghetto he patronizes? He looks like a nice enough guy in his picture, cute dog and all that. He could even be the guy you showed to your mother. But this internet “work” he’s doing lacks judgement.
I don’t think anyone would be like this in their normal life. Maybe a little but not the extreme he has displayed in his “all youse homos” rantings. The internet allows him to be the cantankerous court jester he longs to be. If he was like this in “real life” his mug would probably be best friends with Mr. Knuckle Sandwich.
What he needs is a sidekick, a Laurel to his Hardy, and Abbott to his Costello. Then we could all laugh and have a good time.
Guillermo3
@the other Greg: Actually,TOG,you’re probably right about not taking the ‘net too seriously. For better or worse,I was,until 2-3 years ago,a Luddite.Can’t quite accept that the virtual world is just that,or forget that real people are communicating/mis-communicating and,wisely or not feeling real emotions,having real reactions.As you probably know,but that I did not until a year,or so,ago:There is a concept now of the Post-human,or Post-human,or Anti-Human.At its grimmest and most dystopian,it’s illustrated in the Fassbinder film “World On A Wire”
and the very recent film “Antiviral”.
Yes,F-book can be treacherous:I’ve found out[and have at least partially,by my comments,alienated,or nearly alienated]
things about relatives and friends that I didn’t know and wish that I had not discovered.
As for Drano,TOG:Don’t knock it ’til you’ve tried it!
the other Greg
@goweho: Thanks, and agreed. If anything he seems a bit old (30) for this Life Entirely Online stuff, old enough to remember before the net. In the ’80s I certainly knew guys like that, with that type of aggrieved energy, the difference being we had even more real problems for them to fight – & no net yet to waste time on, or to use to blame other gay people for not “doing” something (which apparently is more fun than just, you know, doing something yourself). Not really possible in my/my bf’s type of HIV work.
I have a friend who fancies himself a marriage “activist” but his “activism” consists entirely of sending angry emails to his gay friends trying to goad them into doing whatever work would actually need to be done on such an issue. Whatever that might be. If one were to ask him exactly what work would be required, I doubt he would even quite understand the question! He might even resent the question. It’s enough for him to be angry about it and to “care” more than those he’s pompously bombarding with emails, which gives him the moral high ground, in his mind anyway.
@Guillermo3: will try to check out the films in the dark winter days, but not the Drano, ha.
Nathan
@Boricuaex: “substitute black” as you say and what you have is acting in black face. Not a very good argument on your part…
goweho
I notice a lot of the people concerned about “grey matter” are drawn to these comments. If you are so interested in it you should go into psychotherapy. Either as a student or as a mental patient.
Guillermo3
@goweho:Go!,goweho!:That’s pretty good for an idiot!
invisiblebully
@Charles175: @MikeE: First of all its a psa about aids awareness.If his role was that of gay man he doesn’t have to kiss another guy to prove that he is a gay man.That is not the main point of the whole thing ,also how does not wanting to kiss another gay man because your straight being homophobic?? .After all he is straight hes used to kissing woman not men ,his reaction is perfectly natural.People shouldnt get on his case about it,acting is about having control not losing control. He was just being professional , the fact that he even volunteered to do the psa to help raise awareness for gays .I think,says speaks volumes he’s no less of a person because he didnt want to lock lips with another guy.That’s just fucking ignorant of the lowest common denominator .I’m and actor myself ,a straight one i dont have a problem doing a psa playing a character who happens to be gay.I however wouldnt kiss another man myself because i would find it uncomfortable as a straight man to do.There are other ways of playing gay without having to lock lips and pound each other in the ass.
Don’t you think that paints gays in a sterotypical light and not in a human light ? I also wouldn’t do it to support any kind of agenda .I would do what feels right because its something i know to be right .As actors its our jobs to show the human condition from different perspectives while enlightening others .We stand on all sides not just one side or the other .We play no favorties we favor all that is our job we are not politicians trying to win votes .Neither is this guy ,i know its 2013 and gay is being more excepted and thats great.It doesnt mean however we need to adjust our lives to fit the gay way of living;grow up.