“American Horror Story” Stick-Figure Recap: Unholy Night

Briarcliff Manor must spend its budget on tortuous medical producers instead of security: Lana and Sister Jude just ran from room to room all episode.

Also, Sister Mary still throws objects/people around with her devil powers, and those damn alien hands continue to do a lot of mucking stuff up (and not much else).

But don’t take my word for it. Let these stick figures be your guide:












Jason Sweeten is a contributing writer for Queerty. All he wants for Christmas is Dylan McDermott.

Photo: Byron Cohen/FX