There’s people that are going to probably go to their grave thinking whatever they think about the LGBT community. That’s their problem, not mine. And there’s people that think that monogamy and bisexuality are mutually exclusive. Again, their problem not mine…The reason I feel like it’s important to talk about this stuff is that the more normal and, frankly, mundane and boring this stuff becomes, I think the better it’s going to be for everyone who is part of our community.”
— Oscar-winning actress Anna Paquin, who is married to Stephen Moyer, her True Blood costar and father of her twins, expressing thoughts on her sexual orientation with HuffPo
H/t: Yahoo
hyhybt
Of course it’s possible. Why wouldn’t it be?
Wingfield
@hyhybt: it’s the idea that if you really like p3nis and v@gina equally can you really be happy with just one?
hyhybt
@Wingfield: If you’re just after body parts, monogamy isn’t for you anyway.
Mezaien
What Monogamous? is it English? I don`t want to miss on HOMO sex.
michael mellor
I don’t like bisexual women. Most of them are faking it. They want the attention.
A lot of these supposedly bisexual women are resentful of men who are bisexual because male bisexuality tends to be genuine and represents a threat to her ability to market her manufactured sexuality to men.
The only genuine bisexual people I’ve met have all been men.
ttzach
@Wingfield: I like blonds and brunettes, will I ever be happy with just one?
ttzach
@michael mellor: I can’t even
Stache99
@ttzach: +1..
Paco
The best relationships I have had have been with bisexual men. Actual dates and even flowers on occasion. They were heteronormative with the courting and very monogamous. Was quite the refreshing change from the usual “Give me your hole and I might date you later if nothing better comes along”. I have only been with a couple admitted bisexual men so I don’t know if that is the norm with them, but the first time it happened, I was hooked. I wish I would meet more.
jwrappaport
In other news, the sun rose today.
@Paco: I’ve definitely had a similar experience.
masc4masc
That was a pretty contradictory statement, but I get what she basically means. The fact that she even felt like she had to say this just shows how much evolving both heteros and gays/lesbians still have to do when it comes to bisexuality. As an openly bi guy, I’ve found it’s easier to just date other bi men and women.
Wingfield
@ttzach: ask her that, It’s just the assumption a lot of people make. But keep in mind something like hair color preference isn’t quite the same as enjoying both types of genetalia. Hair ultimately has the same function regardless of color, different body parts can do different things to and for your body.
Cam
@masc4masc:
Or the fact that she had to say it points our her own issues.
DistingueTraces
@Cam:How is this a meaningful point? Obviously homophobia is both society’s issue and her own issue, because she lives as part of a homophobic society.
We all do. And we’re all mentally affected by it, and we’re all sometimes guilty of reinforcing it with culturally ingrained behavior.
michael mellor
I always say this to straight guys: never call yourselves straight.
Male power comes from keeping women guessing.
hudson
@ttzach: +2, wow
Dxley
No one cares about women’s sexuality. I don’t think a woman can ever be homosexual let alone bisexual. They do it just to attract the attention of straight males and that’s why women are not so sexually powerful!
Tracy Pope
@michael mellor: Dear JimBryant,
oh never mind…
Tracy Pope
It seems that the mindset of those who say someone can’t be bisexual is very similar to those that say someone can’t be homosexual. These are the type of people who declare that “being” homosexual is a choice.
The part of this article about being monogamous is about the only part that is about choice.
robirob
Some people have the problem to understand that you don’t fall in love with genitals. You fall in love with a person.
michael mellor
Tracy Pope,
A serious discussion of human sexuality cannot neglect the fact that women don’t need to be aroused to expel their gametes. It makes it easy for women to fake their sexuality.
inbama
Y’all bitter queens are just jealous because Paquin got to do sex scenes with Alexander Skarsgard and Joe Mantello.
GeriHew
@michael mellor: You’re not a genuine person Jason. That’s why you need dozens of pseudonyms. But you’ll always be just Jason to me 🙂
GeriHew
@Cam:
“Or the fact that she had to say it points our her own issues.”
Was that just a typo, or was it a bungled Freudian slip?
GeriHew
@Dxley: A gay man who thinks lesbians don’t really exist?
Whatever next?
samwise343
@Tracy Pope: Yeah!!!! I kept trying to remember who Mellor was before. That’s him! I don’t remember when he was Jason. Thankfully.
Cam
@GeriHew:
LOL!!!!! Who can say?
Tackle
@Tracy Pope: Not only JimBryant, but those of us who have been around here for the past five year’s, also knew him as Jason. Then later as Bruce. And he’s been banned a couple of times, yet keeps coming back like a bad dream.
Tackle
Anna is such an amazingly gifted actress. To too this does not translate into to being an equally gifted speaker,or interviewee. This
could have been a very teachable moment on her part. But what does she do, she comes off as bitchy, snarky and
passive-aggressive. I could understand her frustrations, due to so many people being suspicious and not understanding
bisexuals/bisexuality. And she should take her own advice: This is HER problem. And deal with it. Right Anna? After all, it’s something she should be use to now.I didn’t learn anything from the interview except what sh!tty interviewee she is. She could and should have taken the time to explain, ” when or if a person has a desire for both sexes, how do you deal with that when being monogamous to one sex? Do you just turn or shut it off. Is it easy for you, and do you feelssomewhat tortured, or like you are missing something, and expressing ALL of who you are when being monogamous?? ” Someone who is mature could have made this plain and simple.
Cam
@Tackle:
Was he called “Brent” for a short time too?”
Jonty Coppersmith
Several previous comments above have seemed to find fault with Anna Paquin’s statement.
I find nothing at all wrong with what she said. In fact, I think she’s spot on. I do however think there is a problem with the author of this little article, whoever that might be. I’m specifically referring to the headline which originally said Anna Paquin “Claims” You Can Be Both Bisexual and Monogamous. Now the headline uses “Insists” in lieu of “Claims.” In both cases it appears the writer is clearly implying that bisexuals are not capable of monogamy. That is just wrong, and whoever posted this drivel should be ashamed.
tdx3fan
I absolutely agree with her. Being LGBT has to do with attraction not physical action. You can absolutely be attracted to both genders and not act on it.
That being sad, I think monogamy is a completely dated concept that no self-respecting person actually believes in. I own my own body, my partner does not get to tell me what to do with it.
tdx3fan
@michael mellor: Forgive me if I don’t take your circle of friends as proof of anything other than the some people can have absolutely no respect for themselves.
tdx3fan
@masc4masc: Oh come on, we all know based on your past comments that you detest the gay community. The reason you want to date bisexual men and women is because you feel gay men are beneath you… you feel they can never be as manly as you, and being manly is the most important thing in your world.
Stache99
@tdx3fan: Bingo. This closet case troll has never once spoken well of gay men. Only negative. Nothing but endless babble about how much better it is to be a normal he man. He supposedly has a wife and kids and plays on the side. Learned that from the post about gays making good parents which got his man panties all in a twist.
Charlie in Charge
@Cam: Sooooooo when gay men say that gay men can have monogamous relationships…. they are pointing out their own issues?
tdx3fan
@Tackle: She is a bitchy bad interviewee because she didn’t give you the exact comments you were looking for. What the hell makes you so incredibly important? She has no obligation to you. I actually like the way she speaks here. It is not her job to be an educator. Its her job to express herself.
tdx3fan
Just because we are gay men does not mean we need to feel the desire to hate women. There is so much misogynist crap in this post I feel like I’m at a Republican convention.
cformusic
no shit
Tackle
@Cam: Forgot that one. Yes he was…
Tackle
@tdx3fan: Yes she is, and that’s my opinion. And you like her interview, and the answers she gave, well good for you! Now you and Anna can both take a sh!t together and enjoy each others stench.
And I never said or implied that that I was so damed important. But if your own insecurity and inferiority have got the best of you, then that is YOUR own fu@king problem.
And a response to your early post: Monogamy is not “dated.” I practice it, and love it. It saves/saved me from alot of diseases: -)
And I and others I know who practice it, happen to have much self respect. And maybe the reason you choose or cannot be monogamous, is because you lack discipline, control and restraint D…
ChiChi Man
I don’t get the shade being thrown at Paquin. I know many people who don’t believe that bisexuality exists and/or that bisexual people (especially women) are promiscuous and can’t be trusted to stay faithful. She’s responding to that b.s.
Someone (I guess, me) should also note that this quote is from a HuffPost Live interview that you can watch. The interviewer was not great. She even asked about about BILL’S reaction to Paquin’s sexuality – Bill is the character played by Paquin’s husband, Stephen Moyer lol. But Paquin handled the annoying questions with grace.
Paco
@tdx3fan: I don’t understand it either. Sometimes it comes off as some kind of deep seated jealousy towards women.
Dxley
There’s no such thing as misogyny!
Stache99
@Dxley: Not getting enough attention sweety?
vive
@Paco, that sounds like a nice experience. While never seriously dating a bi guy, I have found it hard to connect with them given that I know there is a part of them I could never understand deeply, namely their attraction to women (I am 100% gay so I don’t get it at all) – it would prevent me from fully bonding to them, but that’s just me.
Dxley
@Stache99: Ahhhhh! You understand me. Why aren’t we fucking?
michael mellor
Men are extremely bisexual because they are very sexual. The things that stop men from seeking out men for sex are shame as imposed by religion and by women.
Women fear the physical power of men and the unbridled nature of male sexuality in general. This includes male bisexuality. Even bisexual women resent male bisexuality.
A man who is able to turn to men after being sexually rejected by women is a very powerful thing.
Paco
@michael mellor: I’m willing to bet you masturbate to that delusion. Yes?
Meb
I understand that a bisexual person is always bi. But I do not understand that underlines so strongly about it while is married or in a relationship. I mean, if a person is in a straight relationship would be for all purposes heterosexual.
hyhybt
@Meb: “But I do not understand that underlines so strongly about it while is married or in a relationship.”—Would you mind clarifying what you’d meant to say there? There are words missing, or present that shouldn’t be, or in the wrong order, because that doesn’t make a parseable sentence.
masc4masc
@Cam: Doubt it. Her statement is clearly a reaction. Sometimes straight guys treat bi women like nymphos. Lots of misogyny directed at them. Though I’m sure Anna’s gotten the most vitriol from lesbians, especially after marrying a man. Gays and lesbians seem to be much more offended by bisexuality (see tdx3fan’s comment).
@tdx3fan: Last time I checked B was part of the LGBT. Yes, bi guys do tend to be much more naturally masculine, but there’s also an easier bond. I don’t have to explain myself. I don’t have to constantly reassure them that I can be totally satisfied in a relationship with another guy just as I can with a woman. I can talk about how insanely hot Olivia Wilde is without them second guessing the whole relationship (true story). Like I said, it’s just easier for many reasons.
michael mellor
Resentment towards female bisexuality is essentially a resentment of females and their tendency to fake their sexuality.
DistingueTraces
it’s not actually all that funny that you’re horrible
Tracy Pope
@Tackle: I remember a few of those aliases. I’ve just never felt compelled to post here until recently. I often read some of those comments and think “Nope, too dull, not worth responding to”. That, and the fact that I’m too much of an a***ole to care most of the time 😉
inbama
“Naturally masculine?”
Down here the biggest nellies all are or have been married with children. Some would make bisexual Andy Dick look butch.
Dxley
I’m so loving me some Michael Mellor right now!
Meb
@hyhybt:
Ha, ha, ha… Ok…
In summary, if she is married and she leads exclusively a straight life I do not understand (or I do not believe) that the bisexuality can be so important for her.
hyhybt
@Meb: Try talking to them. Better, try *listening* to them. And remember that just because you don’t understand something doesn’t mean it’s not true.
vive
@Meb, “In summary, if she is married and she leads exclusively a straight life I do not understand (or I do not believe) that the bisexuality can be so important for her.”
Exactly! All these basically straight people jumping on the LGBT bandwagon for attention or for hip credentials.
Tackle
@Meb: @vive: This is what I was wondering, and asking,(In summery) but in a different manner,using different words. And some Assh@le jumped down my throat.
But a little something about these Hollywood/entertainment type unions: Many times, when it’s the women who is bisexual, the man allows them to, and are not bothered if they occasionally play around with women. And Anna insist that a person can both be bisexual and monogamous. But did she ever say that SHE was monogamous??
Cam
@michael mellor: said… “Men are extremely bisexual because they are very sexual. The things that stop men from seeking out men for sex are shame as imposed by religion and by women.”
______________________
If that was true, then why don’t gay men turn to women? Sheesh, you sound like somebody who has never had sex trying to come up with weird ideas in your room while you feverishly masturbate to old episodes of My Little Pony.
Tracy Pope
@Cam: Not cool. That’s completely uncalled for.
Disparaging My Little Pony is a new low.
.
.
.
.
!!!
Tracy Pope
@vive: I’m not sure what world you live on but being LGBT as hip? Really.
Tracy Pope
So many negative “oh no she isn’t” comments here. I’d bet not one of those who’ve posted similarly has actually met her and, other than her statement, knows no real details about her personal life.
Opinion and conjecture is a big part of the foundation in the comment section but sometimes it’s just stupid, ill-conceived, odorous brain vomit.
Paco
@Cam: thanks for saying what I was thinking. Except for the MLP part. Wasn’t thinking that at all. Lol
vive
@Tracy Pope, oh, it’s very hip for a woman to say she’s bi. It’s absolutely the in thing. They are the only part of LGBT that get’s CELEBRATED in the straight world. The planet I’m from straight guys can’t get enough of that.
Meb
@hyhybt:
Honestly, I do not agree with you. I see no need to ask them because I can have my own view about this issue.
Again, what affects us directly is what actually matters to us. Our real life experiences determine our identity perception and our priorities. I do not believe that a abstract concept can be the first priority. But it is merely my view about it.
Meb
@Meb: I made a typo, I meant to say: “an abstract concept”.
Tracy Pope
@vive: I don’t doubt that a lot of straight men fantasize about sex with two women. There’s certainly been plenty written about it. At the same time it’s beyond reason to believe every women who says they’re bisexual says so only because it’s popular – and yes, I’m just as aware as anyone else here that there are entertainment personalities who do just that.
Lefty
@Tracy Pope: Opinion and conjecture is a big part of the foundation in the comment section but sometimes it’s just stupid, ill-conceived, odorous brain vomit.
Most of the time it’s just stupid, ill-conceived, odious brain vomit. Especially when it’s to do with other people’s personal lives.
There’s also a lot of sexism on here, sadly.
vive
@Tracy Pope, sure, she could be for real. However, it sticks in my craw when people who live straight married lives, with all the privileges that entails, appropriate the LGBT identity for themselves, especially in the case of basically straight women who do it for personal benefit.