THERE GOES THE HOOD

Are Gay Sex Shops Corrupting New York’s Youth? Some Residents Say So.

50de0-screen-capture-5Manhattan’s Chelsea district may be known as the city’s premier gayborhood, but its supposedly liberal residents there say they’ve officially reached the limit to their tolerance when it comes to gay sex shops.

The neighborhood just had it’s fifth gay sex shop open up along a five-block stretch on Eighth Avenue. And it turns out, five is the unlucky number.

“It’s starting to feel like Times Square around here,” Stephen P. Williams told the New York Times.

Williams said he’s tired of seeing things like Boy Butter (“a revolutionary creamy formula”) and penis-enlargement systems (“used successfully for 30 years with 15 million satisfied customers”) being advertised in large window displays.

Yes, and the crap that chain stores peddle is so much more pleasing. Plus, where else would J.Lo’s boytoys like Casper Smart who are on the downlow possibly go and get photographed in the process?

One man described as a “father” told the Times that he was recently cooking dinner with his 6-year-old son. When he asked him to get the olive oil, the child replied: “Dad, why don’t we use the Boy Butter?”

Related: Right-Wing Mayor’s Family-Values Platform Foiled By Pesky Gay Sex Shop Receipts

Neighbors also say they regularly find used condoms and latex gloves in front of their homes and see men having sex on playground benches, though police beg to differ.

“We aren’t seeing what they are seeing,” Deputy Inspector Michelle Irizarry said, “and they are not calling us to these locations when they see these things.”

Corey Johnson, the openly gay councilman who represents Chelsea, says he hopes to find a common ground between neighbors and shop owners.

“Chelsea, as a neighborhood, is known around the world as a place of diversity and inclusion,” he said. “One of the challenges that neighborhoods face is how to balance local concerns.”

Good luck with that, councilman.

Related: Keep Your Nipples Unclamped! Newly-Released Documents Reveal Maggie Thatcher Wanted To Ban Sex Toys

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