Love life, supersized! A Reddit user said he asked out a McDonald’s employee and got a date out of the proposition, but his story has other users divided.
In a now-deleted post, the Redditor said he asked out the guy behind the counter, and the guy turned him down and explained that he was already seeing someone. “But today he messaged me saying he hasn’t stopped thinking about that day and how he declined out of shock,” the user wrote in a follow-up post. “He told me deep down he wanted to say yes but just got scared. He wants to meet me.”
“I am absolutely dumbfounded,” he added. “I feel like the happiest man alive right now! Just thought I’d share cause life is surprising. Never stop searching.”
Related: 10 rules for asking out a man on the first date in the age of Grindr
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While some commenters celebrated his success — “Get that McFlurry you bitch!” one wrote — others criticized him for asking someone out at that person’s workplace.
“Never hit on servers when they are working because you are putting them in an awkward situation where they can’t walk away from,” one wrote.
“It only takes 1% of the dudes to think this is okay to make it miserable for a worker who is required to be nice to hundreds of people a day,” observed another. “For every one of these nice [guys], there’s likely 10 skeezier or creepy guys who think it’s cool to do this and might not take a hint.”
One Reddit user, meanwhile, wrote an impassioned post titled “Don’t effing ask people for dates/numbers in the serving industry!”
“Good for the McDonald’s-story-guy that everything worked out in his favor, but that’s definitely not the norm, or to me that isn’t,” the user added. “I don’t know how many people here have actually worked in the service industry and know how awkward some of these situations can be. Sure, it’s all fun and games if the person you’re talking to stays polite even after being rejected, but I’ve seen customers losing their sh*t because of rejections. More so when there are a group of people — say, friends — and one of the guys asks an employee for her number.”
The user continued: “I’m proud and out, despite that I still wouldn’t like anyone to ask me for my number whilst working. Slip me your number and the choice is mine to make whether I want to give you a call or not. The power play is a completely different ordeal in this situation.”
Related: Real struggles of being gay at work are revealed on Whisper
Still, other Redditors begged to differ. “Honestly, people were overreacting… you were fine to ask him as long as [you] were being discreet about it,” one wrote. “As things turned out, it seems like he appreciated your boldness. Good luck to things between you two.”
Commented another: “People enjoy reacting to their version of a ‘social issue,’ their ideas of how problematic it could get, all the different scenarios it happens in… rather than just talk about the situation that we’re talking about. Most of them know that the average customer service employee receives many kinds of inappropriate interactions, on the regular, that drain or affect them. You’re asking him a simple question, getting a ‘no,’ and moving on with your day, doesn’t need a full ‘Power Imbalances in the Workplace’ behavioral lesson.”
And one user pointed out a different issue entirely: “Update us if he smells like French fries.”
PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
So basically he was seeking a #4 with a side of cuck??
rustyiam
The ones complaining are the ones who never get hit on or asked out: Fact! 😉
Crystix
Or they’re ladies and get hit on ALL THE TIME by creepy str8 dudes. I think Ally McBeal said it best. “If they find you attractive, it’s hot. If they find u ugly, it’s sexual harassment. (they’re referencing dame Edna here)
But alas this is reddit and how the eff did this guy get his contact after clearly stating no. Fake reddit garbage.
chupacabra
found that to be totally true
wikidBSTN
OR you could stalk them and ask once they get off work. I don’t think there is any problem in asking. Servers can be nice and just say no if they wish. But that should be the end of it – anything more on the part of the pursuer would be wrong.
Large Marge
Too much social justice warrior crap. He asked nicely (that’s important) and let it go after.
The bigger issue would be having never asked and that person was ‘the one’.
That being said, I was asked out by a person while working and I hated it. My coworkers kind of put him up to it. I didn’t like it at all. It just made me feel weird. But the situation was weird, not necessarily the asking. The dude ‘lurked’ for a while after asking which not only distracted me from my actual job (and literally could have gotten me fired if I made a mistake). I’d always be open to a ‘hey, I’d like to go out sometimes, here’s my number, give me a call.. and then the most important part.. LEAVE (unless I pursue it actively further then).
What happened was that I was literally captive. I couldn’t leave if I wanted to. I was forced into ‘small talk’ that I hate (introvert, but whatevers).. it wasn’t a time for me to chit chat.
Now, I was a bit flattered, but it was the wrong time and wrong approach. Slip me your number and let me decide. Don’t force me to engage with you beyond that (whether I like you or not, I’m still doing my job).
BiDaddyDude
Is Queerty going to talk about the fact Rich Juzwiak of Jezebel and other sites is being accused of sexual harassment by three men of color? It’s true.
Darsithis
When I was 17 and working drive-thru/counter at McDonalds on Morse & Western here in Chicago, there was a very cute dude who would come in regularly, and I always thought he liked me because he would always smile way more with me than any regular I knew. Finally, one day I asked him in the drive-thru window why he was always smiling so much at me, and he said “because I think you’re really cute” and then drove away! The lady afterward was getting her food when he ran up to the window and handed me his phone number.
Unfortunately he was 24, a bit out of my range at 17 and we didn’t end up dating, but like this guy, I didn’t find it a problem at all.
Mr-DJ
The initial story by the person who was asked out was posted as something good that happened to him. And in spite of all of the points made, whether they were good or bad, about how they assumed the situation went down, those ‘commenters’ with their own agendas were taking that story and making it about themselves by doing so. This was not a political piece, or something posted for debate. Those people have their own space to blog or vlog (FB, Twitter, Reddit, etc.) – so they should use it, and not step on others’ joy.
GregoryH
I am of a generation where being gay was a crime, so I’m not comfortable trying to pursue someone in a non-gay environment. I know that may sound archaic, but yes, I’m ‘old.’ Rather be safe than sorry.
ScottOnEarth
Why must people complain about everything?!?! Asking someone out at their place of employment – when done politely – is not crazy or bad. It has always happened, in spite of the Reddit morons.
RoughRugger
Having worked both at McDonald’s AND as a server, I’d say please do NOT verbally proposition someone at their place of employment…it’s hella awkward to say yes OR no. Discreetly pass ’em a note (or find ’em on the apps) & leave the ball in their court.
Alfy
I own a restaurant. I’ve had a few servers who ended up having relationships with customers that asked for their # or out, two got married even. The servers are always talking about how hot this guy or girl is out there and some hint pretty hard to the customers. The girls are always like Alf go check this guy out at table 9 but never my type. One server (black straight male) just got a note and a number from a guy the other day LOL. I had an 18 year old obviously gay server for a year that used to get hit on by ‘straight’ men a lot too and he’d already been banged by everyone I know locally on grindr; he played the innocent boy bit well and got huge tips from old women. It’s just not a big deal why is this a story.
RyanMBecker
I don’t find anything wrong with this although the proper approach would have been to hand the cashier a folded sheet of paper with his phone number or email right before he left. Or if it’s obvious that he’s out, give it to another cashier to give to him. That provides a buffer and guaranteed time delay. Then there’s no immediate pressure and the ball wound be in the server’s court. Of course, the customer should never bring the issue up again if he doesn’t receive a call within a week.
I’ve actually had two gay research patients look up my home number and ask me out. I was flattered beyond belief but turned them down since I’m straight. But I didn’t tell them that. I merely said that I was taken, which was true. But even if I’m gay, the ethical issues would have probably forced me to say no.
JeffreyNobleDonahue
I love how people are quick to tell others how they should go about finding their significant other. If you want to ask someone out while they are working then go for it. I’m pretty sure they will be more flattered than upset and who knows you may find your soulmate. I met my husband in a bar, which others would say is a no-no but guess what, it’s my decision/their decision and not yours. I’ve been with my husband 10 years and counting and I’m sure they can make it too…do you and leave the naysayers behind
RyanMBecker
JeffreyNobleDonahue wrote “I’m pretty sure they will be more flattered than upset”
As I wrote in my post, two patients looked up my home number and left messages asking me out. And yes, I was extremely flattered — so much so that I archived the voicemails. But the thing is that I’m straight (but often mistaken for gay since my research is in a gay-dominated field and my office is full of gayish memorabilia). I wasn’t freaked out, and sometimes even use the mistaken-identity to my advantage (studies show that patients tend to trust providers of their own demographic more and that includes gays).
It helped, of course, that they weren’t complete strangers to me. Heck, I had their full sexual history, HIV/STD status, address, etc — and have even seen them half-naked (the study didn’t require a full body exam, e.g. rectal ?). Ironically, one of the men was a patient of my girlfriend (who referred him to me), so she had seen him naked! Such a tangled web…