Raising My Rainbow

C.J.’s 4th Birthday With ‘Virginia Slims’ And Some Very Friendly Disney Princesses

Raising My Rainbow is written by the mother of a slightly effeminate, possibly gay, totally fabulous son. She’s chronicling their journey on Queerty right here. Read up on RMR‘s cast of characters.

C.J. nearly peed his skinny jeans when we rounded the corner and saw her.

We recently celebrated C.J.’s fourth birthday with a trip to Disneyland (read more about our decision here). We woke up early that morning, drove to Anaheim, parked our car, walked to the tram, rode the tram and walked to the entrance. Finally, all that was standing between us and the mouse was security. “What? Does he play with Barbies?,” asked a security woman whom I will refer to as Virginia Slims, in large part because of the tell-tale smoker’s wrinkles that ringed her mouth. She was eyeing the doll in my son’s grip. “Yeah, he does,” I said as I opened our backpack for inspection. “Really? He plays with Barbies?” Virginia Slims asked again, more interested in my response than if I had large amounts of explosives in my bag.

C.J. and Snow White had a special moment

“Yes. He. Does.” I said with a psychotic smile spreading across my face with frozen eyes and my teeth clenched in fake politeness. “Well, I guess that’s alright,” she said shrugging her shoulders. Well, thank you o’ wise bag checker at Disneyland for letting me know that it is okay for my son to play with Barbies, I had been wondering from whom I should seek affirmation. And, besides, it wasn’t just a Barbie, it was Rapunzel. So there.

The rest of the day was pure Disney magic.

We headed straight for Fantasyland for the Alice and Wonderland ride because C.J. wanted to ride a “pat-a-pillar” (caterpillar for those who don’t speak four-year-old) and fall down the “rabbit ho’” (hole for those with their mind it the gutter). Ride after ride after ride.

C.J. has connections and got a personal intro by Aurora to Jasmine.

Then we hit the high note of our day: the Disney Princess Fantasy Faire. After all, C.J. wanted to go to Di-nee-land to see HIS princesses. “Meet some of your favorite Disney Princesses in person at Disney Princess Fantasy Faire,” the ride promised. “Walk down an enchanting pathway with scenic alcoves perfect for introducing little ones to each princess. Be sure to take a picture and make the special moment last forever! You never know which Disney Princesses will drop by Disney Princess Fantasy Faire to say hello. The greeting pathway usually features 3 Disney Princesses at any given time.”

Oh, we did it, we walked the enchanting pathway and visited the scenic alcoves. We got fairly lucky and met two A-list princesses and one from the B-list: Snow White, Aurora (a.k.a. Sleeping Beauty) and Jasmine.

Hold the doll one way and she is Aurora …

I followed Raising My Rainbow fan Mitch’s advice and told the first princess that it was C.J.’s birthday and all he wanted was to meet princesses. We got the royal treatment and each princess escorted us to the next and personally introduced C.J. to the next princess. It was the happiest 10 minutes of his life. When he gets nervous he stands up real straight, puts both hands behind his back and wrings and twiddles his fingers like he’s trying to pull them off. They were in full motion at the Fantasy Faire.

… flip her over and she’s Ariel. It took C.J. a moment to get over the shock of having two dolls in one.

Visitors conveniently exit into an all-princess gift shop and C.J. picked out his favorite present since the Disney’s Tangled Rapunzel Braiding Friends Hair Braider he got for Christmas. Hold her one way and she is Aurora, flip her over and her dress cascades down, covering her up and revealing Ariel, who was under Aurora’s skirt (how Ariel got under there and what she was doing is content for another blog entirely).

Who better to decorate C.J.’s birthday cake than C.J. himself?

More rides. More food. More fun. More memories. More photos.

At 4 p.m. we made our way to the Plaza Inn for the C.J.’s “My Disneyland Birthday Party with Mickey and Minnie.” We all got a party hat, souvenir sipper cup and mini birthday cake to decorate. We sang songs and snapped some shots with the mice. C.J. thought that everybody in the restaurant was specifically there to celebrate his day of birth, so he felt very special and I considered myself lucky when he didn’t expect all of the aforementioned people to give him a gift. A no-nap tantrum would have ensued for sure.

C.J.’s finished “mouse-terpiece.” We expect a call from Food Network any day now

We stayed until closing and C.J. talked to his Aurora/Ariel doll all the way home. I wonder what Virginia Slims would have thought of that! It was one of our family’s very best days. Happy birthday C.J., four never looked so good.

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  • rhen

    amazing what can happen when parents listen to their kids :)

  • kityglitr

    Love love love this series! Just one quick thing… what makes a Disney Princess A or B list? I guess there’s just a part of me that wants him to fall in love with Tiana or Mulan too!

  • justiceontherocks

    please stop encouraging this woman’s foolish behavior

  • Tommy Marx

    I love the idea of decorating your own mini cakes! I’m going to have to use that soon. Happy Birthday, CJ!

  • Oli

    @justiceontherocks: Why do you think her behaviour is foolish?

  • Bryan

    Regardless of what orientation CJ ends up being, at least he’ll KNOW he is loved by his parents!

  • Judd

    @justiceontherocks: stop encouraging what, giving her son a perfect, happy day?

  • hephaestion

    CJ is the luckiest kid EVER!!

    What a wonderful mother!

    “Justiceontherocks” must be Fred Phelps cruising Queerty again.

  • DJ

    Wish my mom was this supportive. She’s a total bitch when it comes to my orientation. Hell, she should be lucky to have a gay son. How many mothers can say that? lol

  • McMike

    Wow, you know, it’d be really nice if the LGBT community could show this woman our appreciation.

    I’m not sure how many of us are reading this blog but it’d be nice if those of us who wanted to show this woman how terrific she is were able to do so somehow.

    The mother should set up a PO Box so we can send her stuff.

    It’d also be nice if there was some way we could organize and pay for a “princess vacation” for them because there are plenty of us who had mothers that were complete opposites.

  • Jeffree

    Yay CJ’s mom!

    @DJ: Sorry to hear about *your* mom. I’m very lucky that my parents reacted so well when I came out. We went thru a lot of long discussions, but they are totally on board. In fact, my mom is just a little TOO supportive, lol, she’s already planning “the wedding” that, if it occurs, won’t be for 4-5 years. I’m sure she’s already picked out baby-names too, but she knows better than to bring that up around me!

    I hope your mom comes around. I’ve seen some really “anti” parents who really do come to accept their LGB children after what seems like many years.

  • DJ

    @Jeffree: Thanks for your support. She’s gonna have to come around at some point because I’m going to do what makes me happy regardless. She can be apart of it or not. It’s her choice and I don’t care what she thinks. I’m only living by her standards at the moment because I am dependant on her. Selfish? Maybe, but she’s selfish for wanting me to sacrifice my happiness for what she had planned for me to be.

  • Jack

    @justiceontherocks – you’re an asshole.

  • Ryan Schmidt

    I just have to say I look forward to reading the latest stories from you life. I just love so much to hear what goes through a parents mind when their child is different from what is the “norm” as being one of the children who always played with “girl toys” I can tell you 18 years ago all this boy wanted was an Ariel doll, thankfully my mother was just like you and thought of your child’s happiness over what would people think, I wish you the best in raising your rainbow!

  • Mark

    CJ’s mum, you’re great! What a very very lucky little boy to have you as his mum. I predict CJ is going to be one very well adjusted kid and is well on the way to a wonderful life. To anyone who tells you otherwise, they can just go fly a kite. I’d say something stronger, but heck, someone mean enough to be nasty to you should go fly a kite and find some joy in their life.

  • Brian

    So unbelievably awesome. And the gentle snark makes it an even better read.

    I wish everyone had parents like you.

  • Mike

    Your Disneyland blog entry helped me to begin to love Disneyland again after many years of indifference. Thank you.

  • Matthew

    I truly always look forward to the next story you share with us. You are a truly great mom! Very reminiscent of my own mom. My brother and I are both gay, but CJ reminds me a lot of my brother as he was growing up. He always had a strong imagination and a passion for princesses, fairies, and the alike. What you are doing now shows your great support that will continue throughout the rest of his life. It is great to see such loving parents in the world.

  • Healthy Life is Easy

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  • Guy

    I LOL’d at CJ’s cake. Only a four year old could think that looks delicous :) Happy birthday CJ and keep up the great work Rainbow mum.

  • Zander

    you are an awesome mother and so many of us would have only wished that ours would have been as open minded as you are, don’t change please. you are the example and the rare jewel in our society. You truly celebrate thinking outside of the box and let your child be himself, So many other parents force their children to stay in the lines of the male gender or female gender, it’s an endless cycle of sexism in our society and it leads to insecurity and confusion of ones self.

    xoxo – zander.

  • Gin

    That’s great! I’m so glad he got to meet the Princesses on his birthday! :)

    The whole girl/boy toy thing is just stupid as far as we’re concerned. Our daughter is 9 now, but for years when we go to a fast food place and get a kid’s meal she has chosen which toy she wants… so when they ask… “For a boy or girl?” if she happens to want the “boy’s toy” that time, my husband will say very clearly and distinctly,”My daughter would like a boy’s toy, please.” It often confuses them, but she gets the toy she wants, not the one they want to give her!

    Good for you! What a lucky little boy you have! :)

  • Spike

    What a wonderful way to experience childhood, having a parent the encourages his imagination rather the censor it in accordance with society’s expectations.

  • Lesley7

    CJ’s mom and dad, I am so glad that both of you support CJ. So much of what CJ is doing reminds me of myself at his age. Unfortunately, I got the boys don’t do that, boys don’t play with that speeches. I also would like you as parents to consider the transgender card. I am a male to female transgendered person who from the time I was CJ’s age felt that I was born the wrong sex. Just keep your ears open especially if CJ says things about wishing to be a girl.

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